cygnusbase 0 #26 April 29, 2005 This is by far the biggest discussion that enters my brain. I am a BASE parent and freshly divorced with 50% custody so I have my daughter week on and week off. Certainly, married or separated I have spent all my time focussed on my child which is why I chose to stop jumping altogether for the last few years until I got things sorted out logistically and emotionally. However, I am gearing up to start up again on the weeks that I am without child because the activity gives me a certain passion for life. I feel that such passion is critical to me and my journey with my daughter at this particular point. It seems that the question of any activity can be plagued by the nagging thought of being selfish and the higher the risk activity the grayer the area of discussion becomes. But what holds true for me is that I believe that the spirit of the child has ultimately chosen you as a parent when he/she enters the world and your natural spirit is what he/she seeks to understand and grow from like a seed in a garden. the only real question you have to ask is did he/she choose you for the journey that you would endure in adventure/risk or the journey you would endure in sacrifice and you have to really look inside yourself for the deep inner part of you that you believe fires your soul. It is this thought that sets my foot over any cliff. Nick, you always bring a rather spiritual perpective to these types of posts(actually most of the posts). But it is not clear to me what you would choose to do although I am sensing you would stop jumping. Am i right? I agree that if I were the remaining parent in this world for my daughter I would start to sacfrifice certain activities becasue the mountains will always be there and you are never to old to BASE jump right?? So, perhaps that is the lesson that I was meant to learn from the spirit that I chose to bring into the world. It would be interesting to hear from your friend Nick. He is a great man, I have often wondered of his personal thoughts on jumping, in between the none stop chores of parenting:) On any given day I wonder if he too looks far into the future when he can at least dream of a jump when his children have found their own path in adulthood. If there is no peace in your heart before the Jump, there is no peace during or after. It's kinda like throwing a WDI of the heart. Are you at peace with your child's journey on this planet without you. if so, get up and walk out your front door and take a deep deep breath. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
base698 14 #27 April 29, 2005 QuoteYour chances of dying in a car crash far out weigh the chances of dying in any sport A lot of car crashes involve alcohol. Have half the jumpers start getting wasted before the jumps and see what the fatality rate is... That's the only fair comparison. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
GravityGirl 0 #28 April 29, 2005 If I was a very experienced BASE jumper when I got pregnant, I MIGHT have decided to continue jumping. But I was very much a novice and already enrolled in the school of hard knocks. So I chose to hang it up. Pun intended. It is a very dangerous sport. So don't fool yourself. And you cannot fool a mother. If you are willing to accept the risk and pursue your passion, your Mom will see how happy it makes you. She may not like the risk factor, but if she loves you, she'll grow to accept your choice. Just make good choices, and make her proud. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Peace and Blue Skies! Bonnie ==>Gravity Gear! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
lifewithoutanet 0 #29 April 29, 2005 QuoteStats don't lie, we all know that driving a car is far more dangerous than flying. Your chances of dying in a car crash far out weigh the chances of dying in any sport I get what you mean in theory and concept...statistically, you may be right. Chance. Odds. But some of it just doesn't fit when I really apply it to BASE. I spend more time in my car than I do jumping, but the amount of risk I expose myself to in the seconds that comprise every jump dwarf the risks of the hours spent on the freeway...even in and around LA. I know that when I step from the exit point that I'm dead until a number of things go right. I never think that when I get into my car. Granted, on a BASE jump, the only knuckleheads I have to worry about are the ones I brought with me, and I generally won't jump with someone I can't trust. Apply this same logic to driving and I'd never leave the house. But generally, when someone says to me, "It's as safe as driving to work." I ask them, "When was the last time you made it to the office, counted heads and said, 'Whew. Everybody made it.'?" Safe? No. Comparable risk? Not really. But chance and odds? I think you're right. We do everything we can to mitigate the risks for a jump. There's not much we can do about the unseen, drunken idiot 3 miles down the road. As for parenting and BASE, I applaud your decision to continue. I read a quote a while back...the jumper was asked if marriage/children had an effect on his jumping. His response was something along the lines of, "I don't want my kids to look back and say, 'Wow. Dad did a lot of cool shit before we came along.'" I don't think there's a general wrong or right answer. I think it's a personal decision. -C. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
manship 0 #30 April 29, 2005 QuoteWe all put our lives at more risk driving to and from the sites. Hi Lonnie, Man ya know I like you but that just can't be right. I know I have been hurt a LOT more BASE jumping than I ever was in a car accident. How about you? ========================================== I didn't invent skydiving, but I jumped with the guys who did. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
manship 0 #31 April 29, 2005 Quote A lot of car crashes involve alcohol. Have half the jumpers start getting wasted before the jumps and see what the fatality rate is... Quote Well, Ok, but you are gonna have a hard time getting that many BASE jumpers to sober up to make the ratio 50 - 50. Quote========================================== I didn't invent skydiving, but I jumped with the guys who did. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites 460 0 #32 April 29, 2005 yes, there is more danger driving to the site than jumping. I drive to all my sites at a minimum speed of at least 170mph!Looks like a death sandwich without the bread - Steve Deadman Morrell, BASE 174 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites TVPB 0 #33 April 29, 2005 I am a BASE parent. I have two absolutely awesome, wonderful, beautiful children. They are one of the most amazing things that I have achieved/done in life. And given the quality of life I have had, that is a big statement. How has it all affected my hobbies / interests / BASE / etc? Absolutely. But it is by choice and it was not forced upon me. I think it was Nick DG that said something like "On the issue of children you do give up some freedom if you chose to have them, or you aren’t doing your job." Its not a job, its a lifestyle choice. And I'm pretty sure that money is always going out, not coming in (except from gifts from grand parents). I have to disagree with you on this one Nick. Having children is a conscious decision to change your priorities in life. And if you have consciously made that decision without accepting the fact that you will have less time to pursue other activities, you are extremely naive and ignorant. You have not lost any freedom. You do however, have to be much more efficient about the way you live your life. You can't just drop everything and go for a jump. You have to plan ahead. You also have to be flexible enough to alter your plans. You have no less or no more freedom when you have kids. You can still travel around the planet and spend all your time jumping. But, if you do this, why in hells name did you have kids for in the first place? People who think they have lost there freedom have not thought about all the consequences and responsibilities involved with children. They have made a mistake. We all have 24 hours each day and seven days each week, etc. If you fill 100% of this time with activities, you have no time left. If you want to pursue other activities or interests, guess what, something has to give. On a personal level, I jump much less now than I have in the past. When I do jump, it is usually focused training camps and international competitions with BASE jumps thrown in during my travels. I occasionally sneak a few jumps in when I do find spare time amongst all my other commitments and interests. I have mellowed somewhat in terms of the quantity and risk level of my jumps. This is due to a number of reasons. Children is one, long time in the sport making a lot of higher risk jumps has had a greater impact, losing jumping buddies (not because I lost them, but because I don't have their company anymore), changing priorities / commitments / life goals, other interests, etc. I have also been very lucky to have an understanding wife. I will never stop BASE jumping, even if I have already made my last jump. I will always be a BASE jumper in my heart. It has been an integral part of who I am during a part of my life where I have undergone immense personal development. And NO ONE can take that away from me. I think doing really high risk jumps well beyond your ability without the potential for great personal reward is a waste of human life. When kids are involved, I think this is where selfish / arrogant / ignorance / comes into it. If the jumps are very well planned for, risk managed, trained & prepared, then my opinion softens quite a bit. Its all relative. And its all about your personal opion, morals, beliefs, ethics. Should you consider your kids when you go jumping? Hell yes. You have chosen to be a part of their lives and to bring them into the world, you should stick around to fulfil the commitment. But this is just my personal opinion, which may change tomorrow. I don't think it is necessarily right. . . . or wrong. Its just an opinion. Do what you heart and your mind tells you is right. Stay Safe Have Fun Good Luck Tom Stay Safe - Have Fun - Good Luck The above could be crap, thought provoking, useful, or . . But not personal. You decide. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites Treejumps 0 #34 April 29, 2005 Damn Kris, you guys got divorced. Sorry to hear that. I hope all is well. I am a base parent of a 6 month old son. I had already reeled in my jumping to a level that I consider at least as safe as skyjumping. It is a personal choice, and clearly I want all the time possible on this planet. However, everyone does what makes them comfortable, and just like jumping iteself, everyone has their own limitations. Cya. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites cygnusbase 0 #35 April 29, 2005 Hey Tree, Congratulations on your child!:) Yes Life has it's suprises and in this case it was a bit of a 180 for me. It's hard for me to say if I corrected it in time. I still am looking for peace there:) For all the BASE parents who find it in their Soul/spirit to pursue what they believe is the right choice, there is nothing greater than that of which you have chosen to be the essence of who you are and who you celebrate that with:) Foot over edge or not, it was always about exploring your inner being anyhow. Koolio. Tree, Keep me in the loop if you are heading to TF or the rocks of chocolate for the turkey boogie. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites klapaucius 0 #36 April 29, 2005 QuoteQuoteI'm guessing your a parent who wants to take up BASE or is thinking of having kids and taking up BASE or somthing. Lonnie took up BASE 1100 jumps ago. That's 1100 BASE jumps. I'd hazard a guess that he is the person on earth with the most experience at being a BASE jumping parent. I feel there is a difference between continuing to jump when becoming a parent and starting to jump while being a parent. On the other subject - the stats: There is 1 fatality every 100,000 skydives or so (USPA) , and 1.7 fatalities every 100,000,000 car-miles (DOT). So if I got the number right, you have a 1:6000 chance to die in a car accident if you drive 10,000 miles a year, and 1:6000 chance to die if you skydive 17 or so times a year. Obviously "mileage will vary": 40 years old in a minivan is not the same thing as a 24 year old in a Mustang. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites Dalai 0 #37 April 30, 2005 QuoteI think doing really high risk jumps well beyond your ability without the potential for great personal reward is a waste of human life. When kids are involved, I think this is where selfish / arrogant / ignorance / comes into it. If the jumps are very well planned for, risk managed, trained & prepared, then my opinion softens quite a bit. Its all relative. And its all about your personal opion, morals, beliefs, ethics. Well said... I agree! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites Faber 0 #38 May 1, 2005 Im a proudly father to 2 kids.Michelle 5 years and sarah 3 years,besides thouse my GF has 2 kids(whith her x husban,Lene and i dont have kids together)Camilla 7 years and Christian 12 years. None of the above kids can rember me not be a jumper(skydiver),actualy only Christian rember as i didnt BASE jump yet...(just 3 years ago i started). ALL of them acsept me as the person i am,they know i love them ALL,they also know that i did choose my way of living and it dosnt matter if i die jumping or behind a sewing mashine.. The kids knows that i feel great about jumping,they know i do care about them and they know that i neither wants to get hurt or killed... Now all you people who DONT have kids BACK OFF,im teiret about this bullshit.. Our way of living is the way we are,you could drive the motorbike aswell as a lifestyle... My kids(speaking all 4 of them) often ask me to my adventures and about if i could tell a storry(about my adventures). They love watching me on video while jumping. IF i stop BASEjumping becourse its "ego" them im not me,however if i stop as i want to walk away,its another case... True our sport is dangerus and you sometimes need to back off. but to you who dont have kids but still parents,when did you stop last time thinking,oh what do i do to my parents?Do you think your even better,i know as a fact that i rather die than surviving ANY of my kids.. i guess YOUR mom and dad think the same... Aslong you play your game as safe as you can,still giving love to thouse you love then they truly will love you and your passion aswell... sorry my "bable"just teiret about reading from people that your selfish while jumpng and having kids..please get it,aslong you have relatives and freinds its selfish.. Stay safe Stefan Faber Share this post Link to post Share on other sites Faber 0 #39 May 1, 2005 QuoteSince you've been BASE jumping, how many funerals for BASE jumpers have you: heard of? attended? hosted? spoken at? less than skydives... you still skydive? Stay safe Stefan Faber Share this post Link to post Share on other sites Faber 0 #40 May 1, 2005 QuoteIn Reply To -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- I just don't understand why you think anyone should quit just because they have kids... -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- I'm pretty sure that's not something he said. thats pretty much what iread between the lines... Stay safe Stefan Faber Share this post Link to post Share on other sites Prev 1 2 Next Page 2 of 2 0 Go To Topic Listing
460 0 #32 April 29, 2005 yes, there is more danger driving to the site than jumping. I drive to all my sites at a minimum speed of at least 170mph!Looks like a death sandwich without the bread - Steve Deadman Morrell, BASE 174 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
TVPB 0 #33 April 29, 2005 I am a BASE parent. I have two absolutely awesome, wonderful, beautiful children. They are one of the most amazing things that I have achieved/done in life. And given the quality of life I have had, that is a big statement. How has it all affected my hobbies / interests / BASE / etc? Absolutely. But it is by choice and it was not forced upon me. I think it was Nick DG that said something like "On the issue of children you do give up some freedom if you chose to have them, or you aren’t doing your job." Its not a job, its a lifestyle choice. And I'm pretty sure that money is always going out, not coming in (except from gifts from grand parents). I have to disagree with you on this one Nick. Having children is a conscious decision to change your priorities in life. And if you have consciously made that decision without accepting the fact that you will have less time to pursue other activities, you are extremely naive and ignorant. You have not lost any freedom. You do however, have to be much more efficient about the way you live your life. You can't just drop everything and go for a jump. You have to plan ahead. You also have to be flexible enough to alter your plans. You have no less or no more freedom when you have kids. You can still travel around the planet and spend all your time jumping. But, if you do this, why in hells name did you have kids for in the first place? People who think they have lost there freedom have not thought about all the consequences and responsibilities involved with children. They have made a mistake. We all have 24 hours each day and seven days each week, etc. If you fill 100% of this time with activities, you have no time left. If you want to pursue other activities or interests, guess what, something has to give. On a personal level, I jump much less now than I have in the past. When I do jump, it is usually focused training camps and international competitions with BASE jumps thrown in during my travels. I occasionally sneak a few jumps in when I do find spare time amongst all my other commitments and interests. I have mellowed somewhat in terms of the quantity and risk level of my jumps. This is due to a number of reasons. Children is one, long time in the sport making a lot of higher risk jumps has had a greater impact, losing jumping buddies (not because I lost them, but because I don't have their company anymore), changing priorities / commitments / life goals, other interests, etc. I have also been very lucky to have an understanding wife. I will never stop BASE jumping, even if I have already made my last jump. I will always be a BASE jumper in my heart. It has been an integral part of who I am during a part of my life where I have undergone immense personal development. And NO ONE can take that away from me. I think doing really high risk jumps well beyond your ability without the potential for great personal reward is a waste of human life. When kids are involved, I think this is where selfish / arrogant / ignorance / comes into it. If the jumps are very well planned for, risk managed, trained & prepared, then my opinion softens quite a bit. Its all relative. And its all about your personal opion, morals, beliefs, ethics. Should you consider your kids when you go jumping? Hell yes. You have chosen to be a part of their lives and to bring them into the world, you should stick around to fulfil the commitment. But this is just my personal opinion, which may change tomorrow. I don't think it is necessarily right. . . . or wrong. Its just an opinion. Do what you heart and your mind tells you is right. Stay Safe Have Fun Good Luck Tom Stay Safe - Have Fun - Good Luck The above could be crap, thought provoking, useful, or . . But not personal. You decide. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Treejumps 0 #34 April 29, 2005 Damn Kris, you guys got divorced. Sorry to hear that. I hope all is well. I am a base parent of a 6 month old son. I had already reeled in my jumping to a level that I consider at least as safe as skyjumping. It is a personal choice, and clearly I want all the time possible on this planet. However, everyone does what makes them comfortable, and just like jumping iteself, everyone has their own limitations. Cya. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
cygnusbase 0 #35 April 29, 2005 Hey Tree, Congratulations on your child!:) Yes Life has it's suprises and in this case it was a bit of a 180 for me. It's hard for me to say if I corrected it in time. I still am looking for peace there:) For all the BASE parents who find it in their Soul/spirit to pursue what they believe is the right choice, there is nothing greater than that of which you have chosen to be the essence of who you are and who you celebrate that with:) Foot over edge or not, it was always about exploring your inner being anyhow. Koolio. Tree, Keep me in the loop if you are heading to TF or the rocks of chocolate for the turkey boogie. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
klapaucius 0 #36 April 29, 2005 QuoteQuoteI'm guessing your a parent who wants to take up BASE or is thinking of having kids and taking up BASE or somthing. Lonnie took up BASE 1100 jumps ago. That's 1100 BASE jumps. I'd hazard a guess that he is the person on earth with the most experience at being a BASE jumping parent. I feel there is a difference between continuing to jump when becoming a parent and starting to jump while being a parent. On the other subject - the stats: There is 1 fatality every 100,000 skydives or so (USPA) , and 1.7 fatalities every 100,000,000 car-miles (DOT). So if I got the number right, you have a 1:6000 chance to die in a car accident if you drive 10,000 miles a year, and 1:6000 chance to die if you skydive 17 or so times a year. Obviously "mileage will vary": 40 years old in a minivan is not the same thing as a 24 year old in a Mustang. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Dalai 0 #37 April 30, 2005 QuoteI think doing really high risk jumps well beyond your ability without the potential for great personal reward is a waste of human life. When kids are involved, I think this is where selfish / arrogant / ignorance / comes into it. If the jumps are very well planned for, risk managed, trained & prepared, then my opinion softens quite a bit. Its all relative. And its all about your personal opion, morals, beliefs, ethics. Well said... I agree! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Faber 0 #38 May 1, 2005 Im a proudly father to 2 kids.Michelle 5 years and sarah 3 years,besides thouse my GF has 2 kids(whith her x husban,Lene and i dont have kids together)Camilla 7 years and Christian 12 years. None of the above kids can rember me not be a jumper(skydiver),actualy only Christian rember as i didnt BASE jump yet...(just 3 years ago i started). ALL of them acsept me as the person i am,they know i love them ALL,they also know that i did choose my way of living and it dosnt matter if i die jumping or behind a sewing mashine.. The kids knows that i feel great about jumping,they know i do care about them and they know that i neither wants to get hurt or killed... Now all you people who DONT have kids BACK OFF,im teiret about this bullshit.. Our way of living is the way we are,you could drive the motorbike aswell as a lifestyle... My kids(speaking all 4 of them) often ask me to my adventures and about if i could tell a storry(about my adventures). They love watching me on video while jumping. IF i stop BASEjumping becourse its "ego" them im not me,however if i stop as i want to walk away,its another case... True our sport is dangerus and you sometimes need to back off. but to you who dont have kids but still parents,when did you stop last time thinking,oh what do i do to my parents?Do you think your even better,i know as a fact that i rather die than surviving ANY of my kids.. i guess YOUR mom and dad think the same... Aslong you play your game as safe as you can,still giving love to thouse you love then they truly will love you and your passion aswell... sorry my "bable"just teiret about reading from people that your selfish while jumpng and having kids..please get it,aslong you have relatives and freinds its selfish.. Stay safe Stefan Faber Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Faber 0 #39 May 1, 2005 QuoteSince you've been BASE jumping, how many funerals for BASE jumpers have you: heard of? attended? hosted? spoken at? less than skydives... you still skydive? Stay safe Stefan Faber Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Faber 0 #40 May 1, 2005 QuoteIn Reply To -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- I just don't understand why you think anyone should quit just because they have kids... -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- I'm pretty sure that's not something he said. thats pretty much what iread between the lines... Stay safe Stefan Faber Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
