Reasons for calling in sick

[BillyVance 34]

Saw this site and laughed out loud.

Some good ones in there! What else have you heard/used? Extra points for originality!

http://www.theworkbuzz.com/work/%E2%80%9Ca-chicken-attacked-my-mom%E2%80%9D-and-other-reasons-you-called-in-sick/?cobrand=msn&siteid=cbmsnhpbuzz>1=23000

See comment #4 at the bottom!

"Mediocre people don't like high achievers, and high achievers don't like mediocre people." - SIX TIME National Champion coach Nick Saban

[AggieDave 6]

The two years before having a baby I used a total of 6hrs of sick time.

Now, not counting baby-daddy leave, I've burned about 40hrs of sick time sitting home with ear infections and other various typical baby things.

--"When I die, may I be surrounded by scattered chrome and burning gasoline."

[skyrider 0]

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The two years before having a baby I used a total of 6hrs of sick time.

Now, not counting baby-daddy leave, I've burned about 40hrs of sick time sitting home with ear infections and other various typical baby things.

40 hours???Daaaayummm.................



You got one healthy baby......thank you lucky star's!

[AggieDave 6]

Yeah, by and large he's very healthy, he just keeps picking up stuff at day care.

Anyways, I have more sick time available than my wife does (not by a little, but by hundreds of hours). So I'm the stay-at-home winner.

--"When I die, may I be surrounded by scattered chrome and burning gasoline."

[BillyVance 34]

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Yeah, by and large he's very healthy, he just keeps picking up stuff at day care.

Anyways, I have more sick time available than my wife does (not by a little, but by hundreds of hours). So I'm the stay-at-home winner.

Yeah, its the day care that's rife with all those damned germs. We didn't put our older girl into day care until she was 2, and she had hardly ever been sick before then. Then all of a sudden, BAM! She got sick with an ear infection. A month later BAM! Sick again. Next month KABLOOIE! Sick again! By that time our doctor said she would be better off getting her adenoids and tonsils removed, and tubes inserted into her ears. So we had that done. The next time she got sick, I saw her right ear all covered with that yellowish green snot. Since then, she's been pretty good about not getting sick, even though she's now in her 3rd year at that day care/pre-kindergarten.

We're fortunate that we do not have to put our 2nd girl in day care. She's always got one of us at home to care for her. Hopefully she won't go through what her big sister experienced.

"Mediocre people don't like high achievers, and high achievers don't like mediocre people." - SIX TIME National Champion coach Nick Saban

[skipbelt 0]

one of these days you will call in well to work , and it will be a beautiful day !

[Conundrum 1]

[skycamefalling 0]

Could always call in and say that you have rectal glaucoma.......when they ask what is, tell them that you can not see your ass going to work today.

Speedracer~I predict that Michael Jackson will rise from the dead.
And that a giant radioactive duck will emerge from the ocean and eat Baltimore.

[mutumbo 0]

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Could always call in and say that you have rectal glaucoma.......when they ask what is, tell them that you can not see your ass going to work today.

Lmao. I like that one.

My best one was i calld work and told them i was dead, and that i wouldnt be in today.

Thanatos340(on landing rounds)--
Landing procedure: Hand all the way up, Feet and Knees Together and PLF soon as you get bitch slapped by a planet.

[93zx11 0]

My best was I decided on a thursday to take a trip out to a different dropzone all weekend. I was going to wake up early on friday to call in sick, but overslept a bit.

I ended up calling my boss on the first load on the way up to altitude.

"whaaat, can't hear you. sorry, won't be in today. yeah, bye."

wooohoooo

[Cheach 0]

I am the one who people call into in the morning. Everyone seems to feel saying " I've got it coming out both ends, " is the best excuse ever. I also have one lady- poor gal- she had at least 15 grandparents die in the year she was here.

I woke up next to a blowup doll Ash....so what do you think?

[turtlespeed 226]

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I am the one who people call into in the morning. Everyone seems to feel saying " I've got it coming out both ends, " is the best excuse ever. I also have one lady- poor gal- she had at least 15 grandparents die in the year she was here.

So if I called in and said I have been really bad and should be disciplined . . . would that be a viable excuse?

I'm not usually into the whole 3-way thing, but you got me a little excited with that. - Skymama
BTR #1 / OTB^5 Official #2 / Hellfish #408 / VSCR #108/Tortuga/Orfun

[SSHusky 0]

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So if I called in and said I have been really bad and should be disciplined . . . would that be a viable excuse?

I wish Scott could do that. He does need to punished on a regular basis!

[turtlespeed 226]

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So if I called in and said I have been really bad and should be disciplined . . . would that be a viable excuse?

I wish Scott could do that. He does need to punished on a regular basis!

I can see it happenning.

"Human Rescorses."

-"Yes, this is Bob Newman, in Accounting. I was just instructed to call in, I won't be in today, and maybe not tomorrow."

"What's the issue, Bob?"

-"Evidently, I have been a 'Bad Boy' and I have to be punished."

"I understand Bob, no time will be deducted from either your vacation account, or your sick leave. Make sure you get her all taken care of though, this can't be a habit."

I'm not usually into the whole 3-way thing, but you got me a little excited with that. - Skymama
BTR #1 / OTB^5 Official #2 / Hellfish #408 / VSCR #108/Tortuga/Orfun

[Stem13 0]

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i think that article is full of crap. It says something like 29% of people called out of work when not sick... Are you kidding me?I'd bet the number is closer to 75%.

My sick days are reserved for when something fun comes up and i have to work that day. not for when im sick.

That's what I use mine for. I go into work sick, I'm just going to be sitting around home anyway. Might as well make some "use" of the day and not totally waste it.

some sort of crazy liquor cheeseburger party

[freakflyer9999 1]

I was on a hunting trip with my dad and several of his work buddies when we stopped to have breakfast before starting the drive from Texas to Kansas.

Apparently dad and all of his buddies had scheduled vacation for the following week, but we were leaving on a Friday in order to get there in time for opening day of the pheasant season on Saturday.

Once breakfast was over dad said that he had to make a phone call to work to call in sick. He put a quarter in the pay phone outside (before cell phones) and gave his employee number and stated that he wouldn't be in that day. Then he said hold on and handed the phone to the next guy, who did the same thing. All five or six of them called in sick on the same quarter.

[JohnMitchell 16]

My favorite sick days are the ones where I'm too sick to go into work, but well enough to get things done around the house. This week, on Monday, I came in to do paperwork after taking some benadryl. I got my admin stuff done in 3.5 hours, then had to take the rest of the day sick because I can't work at the radar scope after taking OTC drugs.

[d_squared431 0]

I have not called in sick in over 3-4yrs. Came close a few months back but dragged myself into work.


When I was younger I used to call in all the time. Everything from i was snowed in to there is a bear in my driveway and animal control is on there way. Oh, and my cat was stuck in a tree about 50ft up and my friend is bringing a ladder over.

TPM Sister#130ONTIG#1
I love vodka.I love vodka cause it rhymes with Tuaca~LisaH
You having a clean thought is like billyvance having a clean post.iluvtofly

[VTmotoMike08 0]

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i think that article is full of crap. It says something like 29% of people called out of work when not sick... Are you kidding me?I'd bet the number is closer to 75%.

My sick days are reserved for when something fun comes up and i have to work that day. not for when im sick.

+1
If you're gonna feel like shit, might as well do it on company time!! In fact, I kinda feel a cough coming on for tomorrow... and right before the Halloween Boogie too

[NWFlyer 2]

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i think that article is full of crap. It says something like 29% of people called out of work when not sick... Are you kidding me?I'd bet the number is closer to 75%.

My sick days are reserved for when something fun comes up and i have to work that day. not for when im sick.

I have a bank of "PTO" so sick and vacation comes from the same pool of time. The good news is that my job is one that I can do from home, so I'll usually do that rather than taking a sick day when I just have a nasty cold or flu. We do have a separate bank of days for serious injury/illness, but I think you can't use those unless you're hospitalized, have surgery, or will otherwise be out for 5+ days for sickness.

Edited to add - my best legit "late for work" story was that I couldn't get out of my street because there was a hostage situation down the street. It was a one-block, dead-end street and they had the whole street blocked off past my house - it was a decent neighborhood but the perp had decided to hole up in his grandmother's house (who lived on my street). My boss just laughed at me and said "Really? You couldn't come up with anything better than that?"

"There is only one basic human right, the right to do as you damn well please. And with it comes the only basic human duty, the duty to take the consequences." -P.J. O'Rourke

[mutumbo 0]

Yeah o actually had something likethat happen to me too!! Couldnt get into my appt to get my work clothes because while i was out on a trip to wally world my neighbor, the frienrdly neighboorhood drug dealer got shot and killed. And that was on my second dAy st the job. Haha! Thankfully i was only a little late.

Thanatos340(on landing rounds)--
Landing procedure: Hand all the way up, Feet and Knees Together and PLF soon as you get bitch slapped by a planet.

[JerryBaumchen 1,442]

Hi John,

When I first went to work for the fed. gov't I did a quick calculation on the Sick Leave thing: It would take 20 yrs of never being sick to equal one additional year of credit when I retired.

I decided to use the Sick Leave; I 'think' I had about 8 hrs accrued when I retired.

Darn good pay off IMO,

JerryBaumchen

[Icon134 0]

I don't actually have a pool of sick leave... but technically I'm expected to actually go to the doctor if I am sick instead of going to work...

when ultimately I would probably rather just stay home...

having said that I haven't actually ever called in sick before...

I think if I didn't abuse it I could probably call in sick (if I was actually sick) and not have to report to Sick Call... but I don't know... I've always just gone to work and suffered through my Colds... (because I don't generally get the flu... due to that flu shot thing they force on me every year)

Livin' on the Edge... sleeping with my rigger's wife...

[Southern_Man 0]

I don't get sick very much. I take my sick leave when I do. I can also take it for doctor's appointments or for children's sickness, so that is a nice benefit to have.

I have a huge amount of sick time saved, I guess my plan is to use it if I ever have a skydiving accident.

"What if there were no hypothetical questions?"

[regulator 0]

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I don't get sick very much. I take my sick leave when I do. I can also take it for doctor's appointments or for children's sickness, so that is a nice benefit to have.

I have a huge amount of sick time saved, I guess my plan is to use it if I ever have a skydiving accident.

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Look if you want to get away with being away from work and not having to answer any questions when you get back....(it helps to have a job you dislike). But just man up..go tell your boss that you just caught Gonorrhea from a hooker you banged a few nights ago. No one is going to want to see your pubes and I'm pretty sure no one will want to breach tthat subject publicly. It's a win-win situation....you get to be off work...and everyone is now afraid to talk to you. Brilliant!