marriage stats

[highfly 0]

100% of all divorces are started by marriages

www.myspace.com/durtymac

[OlympiaStoica 0]

Quote

100% of all divorces are started by marriages

Duh ... thanks Captain Obvious ...

(I get what you subtly imply though ... no marriage to begin with = no divorce to deal with later.)

O

[OlympiaStoica 0]

Quote

I like your post. It seems that the people who are against marriage have experienced a bad marriage because of the person they chose to marry. Im 26 years old with a wonderful boyfriend (celebrated three years together yesterday, actually
It seems as if marriage as an institution shouldn't be to blame, but rather the combination of the two people that share the union, and the changes the individuals make toward each other when the world 'husband' and 'wife' are now taped on their foreheads.

You see … when I was 24 years old and in love, I too was driven by the bliss of my ignorance and naiveté … my relationship was wonderful and I was so arrogant as to believe that the downfalls of all other people whom have loved and lost before me will not apply to me and my relationship. When I got married, I would have bet my life that I/we would be smarter and luckier and more perseverant than all those other people … if someone told me that statistically I only have a 50% chance of making it, I dismissed them as being jealous of my happiness.

With that being said, don’t let us jaded divorcees rain on your parade. You are young, in love and full of hope … just because you might get married one day and you might get divorced one day years after that, it doesn’t diminishes or devalues the love you feel today.

As for your statement “that the people who are against marriage have experienced a bad marriage because of the person they chose to marry” … that’s the arrogance I mention above speaking. You not so subtly imply that the marriage failed because of choosing the wrong person to marry … in actuality, it’s never that simple … but you too will learn that lesson … in time.

O

[TiaDanger 0]

Quote

You not so subtly imply that the marriage failed because of choosing the wrong person to marry …

Okay, maybe those weren't the right words, but below in my post I said " It seems as if marriage as an institution shouldn't be to blame, but rather the combination of the two people that share the union, and the changes the individuals make toward each other"...maybe this statement is more appropriate. It's semantics really, because the bottom line is the same regardless-one or both in the union change in a way that doesn't jive with the other. And, I guess, only time will tell if that ever happens with two people.

You're right, I may get married and things may fall apart. But, I'm hoping that these unmarried years of ours will get all the kinks worked out and improve communication enough that we can get through the hard times.

But I agree with everybody about infidelity being a deal breaker, divorce maker. I don't stand for that shit. I am so very sorry for anybody who has gone through that and sincerely hope that they never have to experience it again.

And for the record: the appropriate ranking of cool modes of transportation is jet pack, hover board, transporter, Batmobile, and THEN giant ant.
D.S. #8.8

[amstalder 0]

Quote

I like your post. It seems that the people who are against marriage have experienced a bad marriage because of the person they chose to marry. Im 26 years old with a wonderful boyfriend (celebrated three years together yesterday, actually
It seems as if marriage as an institution shouldn't be to blame, but rather the combination of the two people that share the union, and the changes the individuals make toward each other when the world 'husband' and 'wife' are now taped on their foreheads.

I like your post
I got married a week ago... And quite honestly, before I met Patrick, I swore up and down that I wouldnt be married before I was 40 and had made a name for myself in one of the big four accounting firms. Im also a big believer in the "If you really are perfect for each other, you dont actually NEED to get married" theory. However, the Army intervened. The idea of being apart when we dont have to is ridiculous, especially since we'll face a few deployments through his career. So while yes, we did get married a good bit sooner than either of us expected, neither of us could be happier with this decision.

I watched my mother get divorced twice, and quite honestly, nothing scares me more.... I know very very few people getting married with any inkling of "Im going to get divorced," and I hope and pray that I am never one of those people. It breaks my heart that any of you have felt the pain of divorce.

[LuckyMcSwervy 0]

I'm only getting married to have marital relations again. Sex outside of marriage is evil.

Always be kinder than you feel.

[amstalder 0]

Quote

I'm only getting married to have marital relations again. Sex outside of marriage is evil.

wait wait wait... ARE you getting married???? Maybe this should be obvious, but im just checking

[LuckyMcSwervy 0]

Quote

Quote

I'm only getting married to have marital relations again. Sex outside of marriage is evil.

wait wait wait... ARE you getting married???? Maybe this should be obvious, but im just checking

Oh hell no!!

ETA: Yes, I would get married again and be a "surrendered wife".

Always be kinder than you feel.

[amstalder 0]

Quote

Quote

Quote

I'm only getting married to have marital relations again. Sex outside of marriage is evil.

wait wait wait... ARE you getting married???? Maybe this should be obvious, but im just checking

Oh hell no!!

ETA: Yes, I would get married again and be a "surrendered wife".

OK just checking

[LuckyMcSwervy 0]

Quote

Quote

Quote

Quote

I'm only getting married to have marital relations again. Sex outside of marriage is evil.

wait wait wait... ARE you getting married???? Maybe this should be obvious, but im just checking

Oh hell no!!

ETA: Yes, I would get married again and be a "surrendered wife".

OK just checking

I'd like to have a man to cook all of that yummy stuff for.

Always be kinder than you feel.

[happythoughts 0]

Someone once told me that people got married when
they were ready to get married by selecting from those available
at that time.

By being ready, that can mean -
- has a job
- or is out of college finally

People in college, or not yet comfortably financially stable,
are still interested in sex. So, they don't get married,
but they still live together.

They have birth control, they have fun, they don't get
permanently involved with someone who may be just attractive.

Seems like the options have changed since 1920.
Women, especially, have more control over their reproduction,
so they have a different view on the fun part.

[popsjumper 2]

Quote

...us jaded divorcees

Anything we can do to help you over that hump?

My reality and yours are quite different.
I think we're all Bozos on this bus.
Falcon5232, SCS8170, SCSA353, POPS9398, DS239

[popsjumper 2]

Quote

Quote

I used to think all divorces were caused by women but that doesn't hold true any more since gay marriages came into vogue.

You “used to think” … but don’t exercise that skill anymore? You clearly didn’t before making this statement ...

O

Right. I used to think, I think, but I think that thinking is somewhat overrated so I think I think less often now, I think, if you think about it.

"Think" is such as weird word donchya think?

My reality and yours are quite different.
I think we're all Bozos on this bus.
Falcon5232, SCS8170, SCSA353, POPS9398, DS239

[DFWAJG 4]

I love being married. Even with my first marriage, I loved being married. My first husband was a mean, nasty, abusive, cruel, narcissistic asshole. But I loved having a "husband." I felt a sense of accomplishment. I felt "grown-up." And I loved coming home to someone, or having someone come home to me.

My new marriage, is just lovely! LR is just such a kind and caring man. He is considerate. We learn from one another. We share similar interests and introduce one another to our own interests. Last month, I introduced LR to The Pageant of the Masters, a fabulous living art show held annually in SoCal. This weekend, he is introducing me to professional hockey in Las Vegas. We enjoy sharing our lives together.

Aside from our similar interests, we have similar goals, in our careers, our finances, our living desires and how we want our children raised. We compliment one another.

And above all, we have a mutual respect for one another that developed long before we ever met face to face. Our friendship grew out of writing letters to one another which developed a stronger bond that I have ever had when dating someone that I had already physically known. We were able to get to know one another without the sex getting in the way.

LR was 31 when he first married, I was 35. Both of us had educational and career goals to establish before we considered marriage. While our first marriages did not work out, the bond between us is strong. I would highly recommend marriage, but only when the couple is mature enough and has his and her educational goals accomplished and career goals established and in progress, so that your marriage can be a priority. (Med school and law school destroy marriages).

It takes a lot of mutual respect for one another. You have to bend with a marriage. And above all, have to enjoy and explore your differences as well as your similarities.

[Broke 0]

Quote

I used to think all divorces were caused by women but that doesn't hold true any more since gay marriages came into vogue.

Wait a minute when did you think pops?

Divot your source for all things Hillbilly.
Anvil Brother 84
SCR 14192

[The_Don 0]

http://www.dropzone.com/cgi-bin/forum/gforum.cgi?post=3963628;sb=post_latest_reply;so=ASC;forum_view=forum_view_collapsed;;page=unread#unread

I am NOT being loud.
I'm being enthusiastic!

[OlympiaStoica 0]

Quote

... But I loved having a "husband." I felt a sense of accomplishment. I felt "grown-up." And I loved coming home to someone, or having someone come home to me.

You do realize that one doesn't need to be married to come home to someone ... or have someone come home to him/her ... One doesn't need a piece of paper to have companionship an love in his/her life.

O

[popsjumper 2]

Quote

You do realize that one doesn't need to be married to come home to someone ... or have someone come home to him/her ... One doesn't need a piece of paper to have companionship an love in his/her life.

O

Oh, Damn! I learn something new every day.

My reality and yours are quite different.
I think we're all Bozos on this bus.
Falcon5232, SCS8170, SCSA353, POPS9398, DS239

[popsjumper 2]

Quote

Quote

I used to think all divorces were caused by women but that doesn't hold true any more since gay marriages came into vogue.

Wait a minute when did you think pops?

I think it was in 1972 but I'm not sure.

Oh wait. 1977. Thermodynamics class. I had to think about that one.

My reality and yours are quite different.
I think we're all Bozos on this bus.
Falcon5232, SCS8170, SCSA353, POPS9398, DS239

[ryoder 1,590]

Quote

Oh wait. 1977. Thermodynamics class. I had to think about that one.

AAACCKKK!!!
Why did you need to remind me of that nightmare???

"There are only three things of value: younger women, faster airplanes, and bigger crocodiles" - Arthur Jones.

[Skootz 0]

My question to those in long term relationships without wanting to get married. Do you forever keep separate money?

[Amazon 7]

Quote

Quote

Quote

I used to think all divorces were caused by women but that doesn't hold true any more since gay marriages came into vogue.

Wait a minute when did you think pops?

I think it was in 1972 but I'm not sure.

Oh wait. 1977. Thermodynamics class. I had to think about that one.

Yup... agreed... that one sucked.. and I am pretty damn sure I have not used any of it since altho..... I am sure SOMEONE uses it

[ryoder 1,590]

Quote

Quote

Quote

Quote

I used to think all divorces were caused by women but that doesn't hold true any more since gay marriages came into vogue.

Wait a minute when did you think pops?

I think it was in 1972 but I'm not sure.

Oh wait. 1977. Thermodynamics class. I had to think about that one.

Yup... agreed... that one sucked.. and I am pretty damn sure I have not used any of it since altho..... I am sure SOMEONE uses it

My problem with Thermo was that the prof looked like he was 20 years past retirement age,
and had totally forgotten how to teach anything.
The worst engineering prof I had.

On the flip side, I had an advanced DifEq class with a prof who was a ringer for Abe Vigoda.
One of the best profs I ever had!

"There are only three things of value: younger women, faster airplanes, and bigger crocodiles" - Arthur Jones.

[regulator 0]

I was single for 40 year of my life until the day after my 40th birthday which I got married on. I will say that I lived with her for 4 years to determine the 'drama' factor. If she brought more drama to the table than I was willing to live with then I would leave her. That didnt happen and I am happy with my life. I will say that yes you have to pay to get married and divorced...but the tax returns filing single in the beginning of the year and then filing married at the end..make up for that money spent getting married significantly.

[DFWAJG 4]

Quote

Quote

... But I loved having a "husband." I felt a sense of accomplishment. I felt "grown-up." And I loved coming home to someone, or having someone come home to me.

You do realize that one doesn't need to be married to come home to someone ... or have someone come home to him/her ... One doesn't need a piece of paper to have companionship an love in his/her life.

O

A marriage is not just a piece of paper.