banesanura 1 #26 March 9, 2010 bah hahahahahahaBest Girl Scout Ever. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Thanatos340 1 #27 March 9, 2010 1. Well It is not going to Suck itself!! 2. Nice Shoes, Wanna Fuck? 3. Can I buy you a Drink or would rather I just give you the cash instead? 4. You must have a Keg in your pants cause All I can think about is how much I wanna Tap That Ass!! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
burtonjm 0 #28 March 9, 2010 Wanna get a pizza and fuck?This shit, right here, is OK Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
shropshire 0 #29 March 9, 2010 You don't sweat much for a fat lass (.)Y(.) Chivalry is not dead; it only sleeps for want of work to do. - Jerome K Jerome Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Southern_Man 0 #30 March 9, 2010 Do you know the difference between a ham sandwich and a blow job? "No" Want to have lunch?"What if there were no hypothetical questions?" Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
cocheese 0 #31 March 9, 2010 Quote Quote Quote I really wish you were my Calc homework 'cause then you'd be hard and I'd be doing you on my desk. You've been spending too much time in The Bonfire... Nah Freshman year, you couldnt leave the lunch table until you "picked up" one of the upperclassmen. Silly, but I have a whole bunch of pickup lines now 1st the tatt and now this kind of talk? You were so sweet and innocent. What have we done to you? No more bonfire for you unti you're 40 young lady do you hear me? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Harmless 0 #32 March 9, 2010 QuoteDoes this rag smell like chloroform to you? So are you allergic to GHB?"Damn you Gravity, you win again" Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
regulator 0 #33 March 9, 2010 Is your father a terrorist? Because you're the bomb! Go over to the person with a sugar packet and say, "Excuse me, I think you dropped your name tag." If you were a booger, I'd pick you. Do you have a mirror in your pocket? Because I can see myself in your pants. OR the captain morgan commercial where the guy walks up to this cute girl and asks her to hold this pole for him and when he walks away a flag unfurls saying MARTY...he walks back with two drinks in his hand...thats funny..my names MARTY! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
nigel99 466 #34 March 9, 2010 Quote I know somebody that thinks youre hot. And if i wasnt so shy, I would tell you who it is. I've come across the following: Guy - Hello Spanner Girl - Why you calling me spanner? Guy - Cause everytime I look at you my nuts tightenExperienced jumper - someone who has made mistakes more often than I have and lived. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
JohnMitchell 16 #35 March 9, 2010 My favorite? "I could pay you." Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
JohnMitchell 16 #36 March 9, 2010 Quote You're quite tempting. (This one is actually really good, but I already knew the guy and he doesn't have a chance.) Ah, and there's the truth. The women have always been and will always be in control.It could be the most amazing, witty, G.B. Shaw pickup line in the world and if you look like moldy troll, you're sleeping alone again. But if you look like Brad Pitt, even an incoherent mumble becomes a sparkling gem of humor. What's a guy to do? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
comslayer 0 #37 March 9, 2010 got any south african in you? well would you like some... this has worked for me. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Bolas 5 #38 March 9, 2010 http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zlLPTmwaiJoStupidity if left untreated is self-correcting If ya can't be good, look good, if that fails, make 'em laugh. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
idrankwhat 0 #39 March 9, 2010 "I've got a nine inch tongue and can breathe through my ears". Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
flashvortx 0 #40 March 9, 2010 later tonight i'm gonna be so deep inside you, the man that pulls me out is gonna become the king of england (heard that from collegehumor, thought it was funny). Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
muff528 3 #41 March 9, 2010 Quote later tonight i'm gonna be so deep inside you, the man that pulls me out is gonna become the king of england (heard that from collegehumor, thought it was funny). If I turn the water hose on you do I still get to be king? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
godfrog 2 #42 March 9, 2010 Last week I was working a split shift at camp and the towel (house keeping) girl (19) came in to deliver towels. She didn't seem to mind that I was taking a shower! She did this all week, I varied my shower times and one time she even watched me go into the dry, I think I was being stalked. Kinda weird having some one else like that be so bold!Experience is a difficult teacher, she gives you the test first and the lesson afterward Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Pokerstar 0 #43 March 10, 2010 ".... Yeah, that works, is there an ATM around here?' or Me: You're Cute! Her: I have a Boyfriend Me: I have a gold fish Her: What? Me: Oh, I thought we were talking about things that were irrelevant.Fortunately, I'm adhering to a pretty strict, uh, drug, uh, regimen to keep my mind, you know, uh, limber. --- The Dude --- Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
JohnMitchell 16 #44 March 10, 2010 Quote Me: You're Cute! Her: I have a Boyfriend Me: I have a gold fish Her: What? Me: Oh, I thought we were talking about things that were irrelevant. Perfect. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
IMGR2 0 #45 March 10, 2010 My favorite pickup line is GMC. lol I couldn't help myself. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
liftedtitan 0 #46 March 10, 2010 Those pants look pretty good! They would look even better on the floor next to my bed though! God took the sparkle out of the stars and put it in your eyes. Nice belt!<<<<-------- I shit you not this works killer!Moriuntur omnes, sed non omnes vixerunt. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
jumpoutnow 0 #47 March 10, 2010 I'm from the Himalayas. Wanna see my Yeti?People are crazy. Cuz there's more of 'em. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
slcooper 0 #48 March 10, 2010 Me: Would you like to dance? Her: No Me: I didn't ask you to dance, I said you look fat in those pants! Why would anyone jump out of a perfectly good airplane? Cause the door was open! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Bolas 5 #49 March 10, 2010 Ask her if she want to dance and if she says yes, sit in a chair and assume the lap dance receival pose...Stupidity if left untreated is self-correcting If ya can't be good, look good, if that fails, make 'em laugh. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Harmless 0 #50 March 10, 2010 Quote Those pants look pretty good! They would look even better on the floor next to my bed though! God took the sparkle out of the stars and put it in your eyes. Nice belt! Funny enough I wasn't even hitting on the girl... and "Nice belt" was replied with "Thanks, would you like to take it off me?" and landed me a threesome "Damn you Gravity, you win again" Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites