Guys - what would you consider as cheating?

[Nataly 38]

I'm just curious.. Which one(s) of the above would you consider cheating?

I think for me, all of the above I would consider as being unfaithful if it was my guy doing it.. But I was wondering what guys consider as unfaithful..



Edit - oops! spelling!

"There is no problem so bad you can't make it worse."
- Chris Hadfield
« Sors le martinet et flagelle toi indigne contrôleuse de gestion. »
- my boss

[nanook 1]

I picked all but the second one. I still think it wrong, but I can't imagine possible to not fantasize. As long as either of us doesn't act on it or flirt.

_____________________________

"The trouble with quotes on the internet is that you can never know if they are genuine" - Abraham Lincoln

[Nataly 38]

Quote

I picked all but the second one. I still think it wrong, but I can't imagine possible to not fantasize. As long as either of us doesn't act on it or flirt.

Think you meant the 3rd option? Yeah.. I suppose that's true.. But I guess it depends.. If he/she fantasises all the time and never tells you about it.. I dunno.. Not sure how I feel about that..

"There is no problem so bad you can't make it worse."
- Chris Hadfield
« Sors le martinet et flagelle toi indigne contrôleuse de gestion. »
- my boss

[skyrider 0]

So is there something you would like to share with us?

Everyone has fantasies, and plays flirtatious games, totally harmless, maybe even healthy for a strong relationship!

[skyrider 0]

I picked only the options with a 3 on them right now!

[nanook 1]

OOP! Yup, I meant the third option. I guess that my threshold here is when it goes beyond "Man, if I wasn't married. . ." then it becomes iffy.

_____________________________

"The trouble with quotes on the internet is that you can never know if they are genuine" - Abraham Lincoln

[turtlespeed 220]

No one can be the thought police . . .

I'm not usually into the whole 3-way thing, but you got me a little excited with that. - Skymama
BTR #1 / OTB^5 Official #2 / Hellfish #408 / VSCR #108/Tortuga/Orfun

[hungarianchick 0]

Not a guy, but your poll is missing an important option, emotional infidelity, which is not the same as fantasizing.

Emotional infidelity (google it if you are unsure what it means) is a form of cheating and can lead to physical if not stopped.

Fantasizing is normal and not a form of cheating.

"I love cooking with wine. Sometimes I even put it in the food."

[Smirniof 0]

Well I wouldn't mind my gf/wife sleeping with another chick ...if she allows me to join in :D

[Nataly 38]

Quote

Not a guy, but your poll is missing an important option, emotional infidelity, which is not the same as fantasizing.

Emotional infidelity (google it if you are unsure what it means) is a form of cheating and can lead to physical if not stopped.

Fantasizing is normal and not a form of cheating.

The poll isn't meant to be comprehensive, anyway.. And cheating is a relative term.. I think it's fair to say that not everyone agrees on what is and what isn't acceptable..

For me, infidelity is hard to determine.. But essentially, it's about 2 things:

1 - if you do something you know your partner wouldn't be happy with
2 - if you have to lie about it

If either one (or both) applies, you're almost certainly cheating.

"There is no problem so bad you can't make it worse."
- Chris Hadfield
« Sors le martinet et flagelle toi indigne contrôleuse de gestion. »
- my boss

[ZigZagMarquis 9]

Quote

No one can be the thought police . . .

Give Pelosi time...

[ZigZagMarquis 9]

1 & 2: I'd be disappointed I wasn't invited on the 3-way.

3: No big deal. Guys do it to about other women all the time, its called "married" not "buried".

4: I'd be concerned.

5 - 9: She could find herself some other place to be.

[Remster 30]

Too many options in your damm poll

To me, it boils down to this: are you honest in your relationship, or not. And telling after something happens isnt what I'd call honest.

Remster

[skydiver30960 0]

It's pretty simple: if one of us is having sex, and the other isn't involved, it's cheating.

Elvisio "still leaves plenty of options open" Rodriguez

[skyrider 0]

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It's pretty simple: if one of us is having sex, and the other isn't involved, it's cheating.

Elvisio "still leaves plenty of options open" Rodriguez

then I must cheat almost every day! other than when I am using my wifes escapades for motivation!

[ryoder 1,590]

"internet sex"???

Sorry, but my definition of "sex" doesn't involve sitting at a computer;
Unless she is blocking my view of the monitor.

"There are only three things of value: younger women, faster airplanes, and bigger crocodiles" - Arthur Jones.

[popsjumper 2]

I DID NOT HAVE SEX WITH THAT WOMAN!

My reality and yours are quite different.
I think we're all Bozos on this bus.
Falcon5232, SCS8170, SCSA353, POPS9398, DS239

[Shotgun 1]

Quote

I DID NOT HAVE SEX WITH THAT WOMAN!

Hey, if it's just a cigar and a blow job, that's not really cheating.

[Nataly 38]

Hmm.. So far, fantasising, flirting, and kissing a woman have the lowest scores.. I guess that isn't really too surprising given those are the "milder" choices..

I like Remster's answer, though.. Dishonesty is a pretty sure sign of unfaithfulness..

"There is no problem so bad you can't make it worse."
- Chris Hadfield
« Sors le martinet et flagelle toi indigne contrôleuse de gestion. »
- my boss

[happythoughts 0]

Everybody has to identify what matters to them.
Then, they should find someone with a similar definition of the good/bad relationship.

They should stick to their version. If one violates their
agreement, that's a problem.

If someone wants to change the agreed-upon definition,
they should do it in advance.

The bidness of everyone else is none of my bidness.

[wolfriverjoe 1,523]

Simple fantasies are human nature. That's not cheating.

But cheating is a lot more than physical.

For me at least, a solid relationship is based on intimacy. Physical, emotional, spiritual and intellectual.

I should be most intimate with my partner in those areas.
If I start getting closer to another woman in any of those areas, it feels like cheating.

"There are NO situations which do not call for a French Maid outfit." Lucky McSwervy

"~ya don't GET old by being weak & stupid!" - Airtwardo

[Nataly 38]

That's a good philosophy..

"There is no problem so bad you can't make it worse."
- Chris Hadfield
« Sors le martinet et flagelle toi indigne contrôleuse de gestion. »
- my boss

[Nataly 38]

Quote

I start getting closer to another woman in any of those areas, it feels like cheating.

Agree with you on that one.. Although I can see how you could get spiritually or intellectually close to someone without it being cheating.. Depending on the circumstance.. And only if it's purely platonic, IMO.

"There is no problem so bad you can't make it worse."
- Chris Hadfield
« Sors le martinet et flagelle toi indigne contrôleuse de gestion. »
- my boss

[JohnMitchell 16]

Quote

1 & 2: I'd be disappointed I wasn't invited on the 3-way.

3: No big deal. Guys do it to about other women all the time, its called "married" not "buried".

4: I'd be concerned.

5 - 9: She could find herself some other place to be.

Absolutely frickin' nailed it. A big fat +1 for me.

[davjohns 1]

I had a simple rule when I was married. If there was any chance that an interaction with another woman could look bad, I told my wife about it that night when I saw her. It didn't matter if it was clearly a joke or just being friendly or what. I made sure that my wife had nothing to worry about.

Oddly, I later found out she was cheating on me the whole time. Not sure what that means.

I know it just wouldnt be right to kill all the stupid people that we meet..

But do you think it would be appropriate to just remove all of the warning labels and let nature take its course.