stupid things you did as a kid

[poe62 0]

I was having a conversation with my mom the other day. She told me about how my best friend and I when we were about 6 years old were trying to be helpful and clean for my friend's mom. We took Windex and thoroughly scrubbed a painting to clean it. I had no idea at the time, but it turns out it was an original Renoir painting. Being an artist now, it is one of my "oh shit" moments...I can't believe I destroyed something I find so amazing.

What things have y'all done?

~Nikki
http://www.facebook.com/poe62

Irgity Dirgity

[poe62 0]

I also jumped off the balcony with one of those bungee things with hooks you use to secure things. I thought it'd make a great bungee cord. Man, I was soooo wrong.

~Nikki
http://www.facebook.com/poe62

Irgity Dirgity

[mnealtx 0]

Oh, let's see.... making a parachute out of 4 leaf bags and jumping off the roof over the patio slab - still don't know why I picked that spot, Mom wouldn't have caught me if I'd done it off the garage instead.

Cut down the clothesline to use it to rappel down out of a tree in the backyard.

Took wood that my dad was saving for a cabinet and tried to make skis out of it.

Messing around in the truck (parked on the street) - popped the e-brake and couldn't get it back on.

I got my butt warmed a LOT as a kid... I wonder why?

Mike
I love you, Shannon and Jim.
POPS 9708 , SCR 14706

[poe62 0]

Nice! We used to jump off the roof onto trampolines to see how high we could launch the person sitting on them.

We also got caught jumping off our two story house into our pool that was only 5 feet deep. It seemed like a good idea.

~Nikki
http://www.facebook.com/poe62

Irgity Dirgity

[shropshire 0]

  Quote

I got my butt warmed a LOT as a kid... I wonder why?

Makes us better people - or so "they" say

(.)Y(.)
Chivalry is not dead; it only sleeps for want of work to do. - Jerome K Jerome

[d_squared431 0]

We used to take a 8ft ladder and set it next to the seesaw. One person stood on one side well the other jumped off the top of the ladder. You would shoot pretty high up ....

TPM Sister#130ONTIG#1
I love vodka.I love vodka cause it rhymes with Tuaca~LisaH
You having a clean thought is like billyvance having a clean post.iluvtofly

[Shepp 0]

When I was 6, I tried to make a zipline between two trees using a rope and a coat hanger. About 1 second after leaving tree #1, my encounter with the ground taught me two things:

1. Rope is not a suitable material for a zipline, especially when it is not pulled tight enough.

2. A metal coat hanger will not retain its shape under a 45 pound load.

I fell about 10 feet but managed to escape with only bruised ass and ego.

Experience is a hard teacher because she gives the test first, the lesson afterward.

Accidents don't just happen. They must be carelessly planned.

[MarkTL 0]

In 9th grade I was in bio class and we were doing an experiment. I was bored and took a metal rod and stuck it in the electric output. It shocked me so bad I gave a loud yell and passed out. everyone laughed at me :(

Live life with no regrets

[jtnesbitt 0]

I made my first BASE jump somewhere around 11 years old in a condo we rented in Florida. It was 3 floors with the 2nd and 3rd floors being lofts that overlooked the first floor. My sister and I decided to take turns jumping off the third floor balcony onto the couch on the first floor.

"If this post needs to be moderated I would prefer it to be completly removed and not edited and butchered into a disney movie" - DorkZone Hero

[prodiver913 0]

When I was 4 I locked my 2 year old little brother in a dresser drawer. Then went down stairs and asked my Mom if she needed any help with anything and she knew right away that I had done something.

My Mom had a vintage upright piano from the late 1800's with real ivory keys and when I was 5 I took a hammer and smashed about half of them.

There is a lot more but I don't have 10 hours to spare typing.

I'm completely in favor of the separation of Church and State. My idea is that these two institutions screw us up enough on their own, so both of them together is certain death.

[shropshire 0]

Me and our kid brought home a 'pet' rabbit ... turned out to be a wild one that had, what mom thought was myxomatosis.

I ejected him (my bruv') from the bucket of a dumper truck and split his head open - no damage done to the dumper truck!!

(.)Y(.)
Chivalry is not dead; it only sleeps for want of work to do. - Jerome K Jerome

[Icon134 0]

I was a bit of a monkey as a kid (both my brother and I were in fact) and we were known to climb into the tops of the sugar maples at our parents house.

I did fall out of a tree or two but fortunately I generally fell out of the apple trees and seldom fell more then about 5-10 ft.

Some of the vantage points in the Maple Trees were upwards of 50-70 ft above the ground...

Livin' on the Edge... sleeping with my rigger's wife...

[lawrocket 3]

From another post..

The list of dumb things I did as a kid far exceeds the list of smart things I did as a kid. It's an interesting thing when a mother knows that there is something physically wrong with a kid instead of just being a little boy. I got injured so often, social services were often investigating. Fortunately, the same ER doctors were there, who would vouch that, yes indeed, this was a case of the child abusing himself and the parents, and not a case of the parents abusing the child.

How bad? When I was a child of four, I opened up a gash on my forearm by playing with a glass bottle that I dropped and fell on. I told my parents I didn't was "the pin" - yes, I'd had stitches 7 times, already, and I didn't want them again. I got them anyway, and was returned a few hour slater after I'd pulled them out. It must have hurt like hell to do that, but I was stupid.

Other stuff I did before age 8:

I used to climb roofs, jump off roofs. Climb up our school building grab ahold of the top of a cypress tree and jump (I figured out that it would slow the fall and deliver me safely to the ground.) This continued until one of my friends got hurt when he lost his grip.
I got in fights all the time - 2 or 3 times per week after school.
I'd break bicycles by jumping them.
I'd experiment with electrical currents by plugging stuff in wall sockets.

Maybe the stupidest was the time I filled sandwich baggies with gasoline from the gas can used for the lawn mower. I lit the charcoal grill and stood a few feet away shooting baskets with the baggied gasoline. It was awesome!

Another idiot move was returning from a book fair on my bike. I was reading the book while riding and actually rear-ended a moving car. The dude was not happy and informed my mother of it in no uncertain terms.

My wife is hotter than your wife.

[BillyVance 34]

I did a lot of stupid fucked up shit as a kid, most of which has already been chronicled on here. I put my parents through hell and back, and then back to hell!

The funny thing is, of all that crap I did, none of it involved alcohol or drugs.

I do remember when I was about 13, I found my dad's blue steel .22 revolver (with a trigger lock on it) in a box, including ammo, up on the shelf of my parents' bedroom closet and finding the key for it in their nightstand drawer. I took it downstairs to the basement, set up scrap wood against the concrete block walls and had my own firing range. I missed the wood a few times. You can still see the divots in the wall 25 years later. I never took the gun outside the house though, I knew better.

"Mediocre people don't like high achievers, and high achievers don't like mediocre people." - SIX TIME National Champion coach Nick Saban

[poe62 0]

My mom, on a hunting trip while she was a teen, accidentally shot my grandpa in the butt right after he had told her to make sure the safety was on and the gun was pointed at the ground.

~Nikki
http://www.facebook.com/poe62

Irgity Dirgity

[BillyVance 34]

Hmmm, I don't want to write a book but here's a quasi-summarized list:

Yes, I was a climbing monkey. I was so good at climbing trees that I probably could have had a career with one of the major tree trimming companies if I'd wanted to, and all of my climbs were free-style, sans safety equipment. I never fell out of one, and even climbed some very tall trees for the mistletoe, maybe 80-100 feet up. The only time I did fall from a tree, it was a young one that I had no business being in, I got too high, about 25 feet up in a 35 foot tree, and my weight bent the trunk over so far I snapped it off about 20 feet high and fell 10 feet to the ground still holding the trunk! My dad was sooooo pissed when he got home and noticed the top of the tree missing.

I also climbed up on the roof many times, sometimes deforming the decorative metal support posts for the porch overhangs.

Took my dad's riding mower out when I was 10, let my friend drive it (he'd never driven one before) and panicked when it started rolling backwards down the hill in the backyard and he jumped off before it flipped over upside down against a tree. Thank God he wasn't hurt. That bent the axle on it though I was able to get it righted and restarted so I could drive it back where it was and park it, never telling dad about it. He found out anyway when he noticed the steering wheel a bit off. He never did find out I let my friend ride it, I didn't dare tell him.

Gasoline, hooo boy, did I play with that or what? I'm surprised I didn't burn down the house! Had a metal bucket that I poured about 4 inches of gas in there, threw a match in, FOOOM!!!! Charred the back of the boxwood bushes along the front of the porch and blackened the ceiling of the roof overhang...

After getting my drivers license, I snuck out late at night several times for joy-rides. Once I almost ran out of gas and there were no gas stations open in the city, and I ended up driving 20 mph trying to conserve enough to get home. I was backing the car down the driveway when it did run out. It rolled back and I tried to slam the brakes but the car's bumper smashed the metal gutter drain pipe at the corner of the carport. I had to get the gas can for the mower and pour some in, which was not an easy task with the older cars which had the gas cap behind the license plate, plus the back end of the car was downslope. I was shocked that I never woke my parents up.

Another time during the winter I snuck out in the car and took it up the mountain, hit a patch of black ice and the car did a slow but terrifying 720 degree spin down the slope. I decided I had better go home but that meant going back up the mountain and back over. I couldn't do it on the paved lanes, so I used the graveled/grassy median to get enough traction with one side of the car, and when I got to the top, police had blockaded the highway off so I couldn't go down that way, fuck. The only way was to take the local side road that led to the higher part of the mountain so I went that way, knowing I could go across the ridge to the other side and back down. Only problem, more black ice at the other end where the road took a sharp dive down and there were already two other cars wiped out there. I used the gravel edges off the road to navigate my car through at 2 to 4 mph. Fuck that was scary for a 16 year old, but I never wrecked during any of those secret outings. Dad probably would have disowned me.

Oh yeah, we had a couple of those 4 wheeled giant plant platforms that's used to make it easy to move the big heavy potted plants around. A nice steep downhill driveway into the carport + a wheeled platform + 8 year old boy = trouble. I'd sit on the platform at the top of the driveway, facing the carport, and let go, wheeeeeeeeee! Then use my feet as brakes to keep from slamming into the back door. One time I failed to stop and gashed my forehead on the glass storm door, which shattered.

I took ice skating lessons when I was 6 years old, you know, earning the Alpha, Beta and Gamma patches, which is as far as I got. Huntsville is a hotbed for ice hockey in the south. During a free skate session I tried my hand at speed skating. I really got going and found myself headed right for a group of 3 people standing and talking on the ice and plowed right into them like a bowling ball on pins, STEEERIKKEEEEEE!!!!! And THEN I felt someone's skate run over my finger, and you know how sharp those fuckers are. FUCK that HURT! I got up, looked at my hand and blood was dribbling down my hand and arm. I ran off the ice holding my hand and ran all the way to the front office, skates still on and screaming, leaving a trail of blood 20 yards long. The guy behind the counter couldn't tell which hand was bleeding as both of them were covered in blood. A trip to the family doctor and 7 stitches later I was good as new. 35 years later the scars are still there, including where the stitches went into the skin.

I got so many more stupid shit stories but I wanna go back to reading and postwhoring...

"Mediocre people don't like high achievers, and high achievers don't like mediocre people." - SIX TIME National Champion coach Nick Saban

[ravenhk 0]

I put my brother in the dryer to give him a ride, and when we got caught I mad because I didn't get my ride in dryer.

I tried jumping off with roof with a sheet.

I use to sneak out of my bedroom window, and go ride my horse, and sometimes I would just go out to the barn and sleep, I thought I was getting away with it until my grandmother said that my Dad or no one else had the heart to stop me, I started sneaking out when I was eight and kept doing it unitl I was eighteen.

pain is weakness leaving the body

[skybytch 273]

My older brother did all the stupid stuff. I learned from his mistakes.

I was a perfect child... until they gave me a car.

[jonstark 8]

Drank Clorox

[pirana 0]

I did so many reckless things as a youngster, it is truly amazing I'm still alive.

Started at age 9 and getting hit by a car while riding bicycle, progressed thru falling 40' out of a tree, getting hit by motorcycle while riding bicycle, making an incredibly lucky grab-save while free climbing a rock wall, getting hit by a truck while riding motorcycle (the scariest feeling one by far - really really thought I was going to die), very nearly getting trapped in a burning building, plus a couple others that didn't have quite the fatality potential.

The scariest part is that one of my daughters is of the same ilk. I don't want to see her get hurt badly, but am kinda hoping she has a nasty scare or two so she'll pause to think once in a while.

" . . . the lust for power can be just as completely satisfied by suggesting people into loving their servitude as by flogging them and kicking them into obedience." -- Aldous Huxley

[BillyVance 34]

Ah yes, the ride in the dryer. Done that too, BY myself! It took a bit of rigging with a coat hanger, but I was able to climb in and then start the dryer. I don't remember how I was able to make it keep going with the door open, but for some reason I couldn't stop it. It's truly a disheartening feeling when you're looking out the door and everything's rapidly spinning and there's not a damn thing you can do to stop it. Thank God I had the good sense to do it when mom was home. She heard me screaming and got me out. Tanned my ass for the trouble too.

"Mediocre people don't like high achievers, and high achievers don't like mediocre people." - SIX TIME National Champion coach Nick Saban

[BPilk 0]

I started the woods on fire when i was 6, didnt learn my lesson after that beating...4 years later, i started the side of the house on fire, and nearly the propane heater too...that beating almost killed me, but didnt stop it...5 years later i raked the leaves into the fire, did i mention that the rake was plastic?...yea...that beating stopped it for good..some bad habits are hard to break...!!;)

"Never take life seriously. Nobody gets out alive anyway."

[normiss 846]

Well...I don't have the time to detail ALL of the crap I pulled....but:

Swinging from the flag pole at elementary school - if you stood on the roof, someone could hand you the rope for the flag....get a nice run going, swing a HUGE circle out over the parking lot....and land on the roof again!

Riding my motorcycle on the rear wheel through the halls at the school (only got suspended for it once ) or the Winter Haven mall

Pretended to jump from the 3rd floor platform of the fire escape by sliding down the support pole, then laying on the ground all jacked up looking to make the teacher think I actually jumped...she had a nervous breakdown and again, I was suspended

Completely disassembled the brand new color tv my parents bought - it was the first color tv we had. I put it all back together just fine in fact Dad always joked afterwords that it worked better since I rebuilt it.

Launched Estes rockets in my bedroom, burned a hole in the mattress. Man those things are LOUD indoors.

We had a '76 Trans Am for drivers ed at Winter Haven High coach kicked me out of drivers ed for taking the entire course with the rear tires smoking. SMOKEY BURNOUTS!!! He did compliment me on completing it though.

When I was real little....I filled mom's car up for her...with the garden hose.

Painted dad's taillights on the car with house paint. he was painting the house...I wanted to help!

Used to get the security guards at the local community college to chase me around the golf course on my motorcycle....for some odd reason they didn't like me using the greens as jump ramps.

Used to stick garden hoses in the ground with the water running. You know you can get the ENTIRE hose to drill itself down? Anybody know how the hell to get one out???? Damn did dad cuss when he had to cut off ANOTHER garden hose!!!

Got in a fist fight with a teacher in Jr High. Again, suspended. Dad got me back in though...teacher admitted he started it. Apparently I called him a cocksucker, so he swung on me.

"Borrowed" a Piper Cub from Brown's Seaplane base with my friend once. Winter Haven is real pretty from the air.

We used the roof of the house for a diving board into the pool.

Made pretty little ring decorations all over the interior of mom's car when I was three. That's a cigarette lighter? Whoops...makes real nice little circle patterns too mom!

[poe62 0]

  Quote

I started the woods on fire when i was 6, didnt learn my lesson after that beating...4 years later, i started the side of the house on fire, and nearly the propane heater too...that beating almost killed me, but didnt stop it...5 years later i raked the leaves into the fire, did i mention that the rake was plastic?...yea...that beating stopped it for good..some bad habits are hard to break...!!;)

We used to take lighter fluid and draw pictures in the street then light them. One got a little out of control, and my brother tried to put it out. His pants caught on fire. It was pretty funny.

~Nikki
http://www.facebook.com/poe62

Irgity Dirgity

[ryoder 1,590]

  Quote

Launched Estes rockets in my bedroom, burned a hole in the mattress. Man those things are LOUD indoors.

You know those little electric cars that are about the size of a 1/25 scale plastic model, and powered by 2 AA batteries? Well, I wanted more speed, so I taped an Estes rocket motor to the top of one. Problem was we lived on a gravel road, and the driveway was gravel, so the only smooth surface was the garage floor. I positioned it at the back of the garage pointed toward the open door, so it could at least get a good run before it hit the gravel driveway.

Believe it or not, the car never moved. The motor accelerated so quick that it popped free from the tape and proceeded to richotet around the garage until it burned out, with me doing my wildest war-dance, trying to keep from getting hit/burned by it.

"There are only three things of value: younger women, faster airplanes, and bigger crocodiles" - Arthur Jones.