VanillaSkyGirl 6 #51 July 9, 2009 A piece of advice: Don't take dating advice from a man posting advice to you. Most of them don't know what they are talking about. Also, if the girl likes you, don't worry about overdoing it. Getting lots of attention from the right man always feels good. It's equal to a man getting lots of flirting and attention from a woman that he likes. That feels good, right? That said, don't be fake with your declarations of passion or love. Say what you mean and mean what you say. It's ok to be passionate, if that's what you feel. Leading a girl on for no reason is also wrong. Still, if you ignore a girl that you like or try to act like it's not a big deal to be with her, she might be totally turned off. If a man were to ignore me, he's lost me completely. There is NO reason to be rude like that to anyone, even to a friend, unless a guy or girl does not like the other person. In my book, if a man doesn't call first thing the next morning (or even that same evening as he's driving away), it's because he doesn't like the woman that he dated the night before. No man has followed any of those stupid rules with me, and if he did, I wouldn't date him. Get with the program, people. Real men call. So do real women. Good luck! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
kmills0705 0 #52 July 9, 2009 Quote Talking on the phone IS boring. I can't pay attention at all. Hmmm... My phone conversations lately are anything but boring! Kim Mills USPA D21696 Tandem I, AFF I and Static Line I Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
theonlyski 8 #53 July 9, 2009 Quote Quote And personally I hate the "rules" about how long after the date before you can call the girl. When my American girl friend gave me dating advice and explained to me "the rules", I just stood there in disbelief. That is some fucked up shit!!! He likes you ... you like him ... have fun and be happy. That conversation kinda turned me off from dating American boys -- when she explained to me that they expect me to "play the game" and if I don't, they'll think I'm "easy", my "type" just changed to "foreign men only". No, I won't be as stupid as those people playing "the rules" and I won't stereotype - the last boy I dated was American ... O Does it count if you have spent years outside of the US? How YOU doin "I may be a dirty pirate hooker...but I'm not about to go stand on the corner." iluvtofly DPH -7, TDS 578, Muff 5153, SCR 14890 I'm an asshole, and I approve this message Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
skittles_of_SDC 0 #54 July 9, 2009 Quote Quote Quote And personally I hate the "rules" about how long after the date before you can call the girl. When my American girl friend gave me dating advice and explained to me "the rules", I just stood there in disbelief. That is some fucked up shit!!! He likes you ... you like him ... have fun and be happy. That conversation kinda turned me off from dating American boys -- when she explained to me that they expect me to "play the game" and if I don't, they'll think I'm "easy", my "type" just changed to "foreign men only". No, I won't be as stupid as those people playing "the rules" and I won't stereotype - the last boy I dated was American ... O Does it count if you have spent years outside of the US? How YOU doin You clearly haven't been following the morning coffee thread. VB's got that locked down. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
chasteh 0 #55 July 9, 2009 >Don't take dating advice from a man posting advice to you. Most of them don't know what they are talking about. Amen. >Also, if the girl likes you, don't worry about overdoing it. Getting lots of attention from the right man always feels good. It's equal to a man getting lots of flirting and attention from a woman that he likes. That feels good, right? It just so happens that the one who is the "right man" isn't the one who smothered you on the first few (fifty) dates. Also, getting lots of attention from someone I am really attracted to raises a BIG red flag. Why is this awesome girl suddenly so interested? Does she want something other than an interaction with me? (This has happened to me LOTS. I am a pilot. What beautiful woman who has had men give everything under the sun to her would think that she couldn't get a free ride in an airplane from someone she just met-me?) I'm sure you would think the same way as I do, judging by your looks. "Does this guy want something more from me besides an interaction with me? Hmm. Better make sure he takes it slow." >That said, don't be fake with your declarations of passion or love. Say what you mean and mean what you say. It's ok to be passionate, if that's what you feel. Leading a girl on for no reason is also wrong. Yea, fakeness is a major turnoff for me too. Who is this person that can't even be themselves around me? It is ok to be passionate. Just don't be passionate with someone you just met. Why? Because nutcases are passionate with someone they just met. People in general loathe being smeared, especially when that person is a potential candidate for a relationship. Yep, leading a girl on for no reason is totally wrong. So is leading a guy on for no reason. Slow it down, she hopefully will go slow too, this is cheap insurance to keep yourself from giving your heart to someone who could care less about you in reality. >Still, if you ignore a girl that you like or try to act like it's not a big deal to be with her, she might be totally turned off. If a man were to ignore me, he's lost me completely. There is NO reason to be rude like that to anyone, even to a friend, unless a guy or girl does not like the other person. I whole heartedly agree. Where along the line did we guys think that we had to be dicks (HAH!) to women we just met? I mean, alot of women out there enjoy the company of guys who could care less about them. However, I think it is because they are attracted to the quality of "going slow" that is found in all the "dicks" (HAH!). We can still take it slow without ignoring her. Only girls who are willing to sacrifice their integrity for a dude will respond to rudeness. >In my book, if a man doesn't call first thing the next morning (or even that same evening as he's driving away), it's because he doesn't like the woman that he dated the night before. No man has followed any of those stupid rules with me, and if he did, I wouldn't date him. Wow, I would NEVER call a girl right after the date! Please, NEVER call a guy right after a date, either. Space Space Space! Slow it down! >Get with the program, people. Real men call. So do real women. Good luck! IF your interested and they are interested, they will call after a handfull of days. (And the other person will pick up and be willing to either go on a date or set up for another day if that day won't work.) Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
skittles_of_SDC 0 #56 July 9, 2009 Quote>Don't take dating advice from a man posting advice to you. Most of them don't know what they are talking about. Amen. ... So basically you agree I should ignore everything you just said. Got it. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
OlympiaStoica 0 #57 July 9, 2009 Quote Quote Talking on the phone IS boring. I can't pay attention at all. Hmmm... My phone conversations lately are anything but boring! Ha ha ... same here ... I can't be bored when I'm struggling to understand the tick Swiss accent at the other end ... O Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
chasteh 0 #58 July 9, 2009 That's up to you. She said most of them don't know what they are talking about when it comes to dating. I am saying that, and that most PEOPLE don't know what they are talking about when it comes to dating. edit: After all, we have a 50% divorce rate here in the United States, so you have reason to suspect that half of the people who end up having a serious relationship that makes it to marriage still haven't quite figured out the game themselves. With so many people who don't make it to marriage and break up with someone after dating for say a few months, you have to wonder if people are approaching relationships with perceptions that get them into trouble down the road. I am of the opinion that you will find out who is full of shit and who isn't after having enough dates yourself. Take it or leave it. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
skittles_of_SDC 0 #59 July 9, 2009 You gave advice to wait a few days to call which is entirely contrary to what at least 3 women have said. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
skittles_of_SDC 0 #60 July 9, 2009 nap time. Well actually time to go to bed. keep the replies coming ladies. thanks. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
chasteh 0 #61 July 9, 2009 Yep. In that time she will have time to think about it, to calm down a little bit (if she really had a great time) and think about the next time your going to call. (If she really liked you) edit: Don't assume that because women tell you to call them immediately after a date or that they want you to call them or text them all the time that they will necessarily respond to you better. A woman who doesn't have attachment issues will wait a few days for you. She's also dating other guys while you aren't "together" yet, just like you ought to be. She should know better than to be so possessive so as to require you to phone her the next day to demonstrate your loyalty to her. I think they are telling you this because it is genuinely how they feel. However, I also think that each of them would respond better if you waited a little bit before calling them (Smearing them) as opposed to calling them immediately after the date or the next morning. Try it yourself, man. Hell, your a 21 year old guy, you probably meet two or three girls a day that youd be interested in seeing again, right? Then it must be no big deal for you to take three of them out, call them as the 3 ladies here reccomend and see how they react. Then try my advice. You can take it or leave it, man. If it works out that their advice works better, then so be it. However, being the one dissenting voice here that is telling you this, you might consider it an option. Enjoy your date man. edit: I JUST saw your sigline. How perfect. "Pain is temporary. It may last a minute, or an hour, or a day, or a year, but eventually it will subside and something else will take its place. If I quit, however, it lasts forever. - Lance Armstrong" Perfect, you have great reason to use trial and error then. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
downwardspiral 0 #62 July 9, 2009 The game was invented by women and they make all the rules and the rules change without notice...often. There is at least one perfect example of that in this thread (Hi Rosa! ) The best thing you can do is forget the rules and learn to read body language. She will tell you exactly what you need to do if you're paying attention. www.FourWheelerHB.com Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
anthonyfellows 0 #63 July 9, 2009 Quote Quote Quote Nikki! I already apologized for that. I've obviously moved on, I wish you would too. Seriously though. I don't talk to her every day but I do talk to her several times a week but when I do it's about all kinds of stuff. Not just me trying to convince her to go out with me. Are both hands above the table?? Cause we can tell when you're jerking it when you're talking to us you know. When I talk to people on the phone I'm usually outside smoking cause I'll be honest I need something else to do. Even if I enjoy the conversation I can still get bored. Smoking fixes that. Smoking is BAD!!!!Serious relationships turn into work after a few weeks and I already got a fucking job :) ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ H.A.F. = Hard As Fuck ... Goddamn Amateurs Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
anthonyfellows 0 #64 July 9, 2009 Quote>Don't take dating advice from a man posting advice to you. Most of them don't know what they are talking about. Except for me.Serious relationships turn into work after a few weeks and I already got a fucking job :) ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ H.A.F. = Hard As Fuck ... Goddamn Amateurs Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Rstanley0312 1 #65 July 9, 2009 Quote Definitely a line...if you email/call/text all day for a month telling her how awesome you are and that they should be their girl even after she's made it clear she just wants to be friends, then you're just down right stalkerish and creepy. Not saying you are doing that...but if she comes right out and says no, then you should leave it alone. haha! Sorry...that's just from my personal experience recently. I said I was sorry and I stopped didn't I? Life is all about ass....either you're kicking it, kissing it, working it off, or trying to get a piece of it. Muff Brother #4382 Dudeist Skydiver #000 www.fundraiseadventure.com Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
chasteh 0 #66 July 9, 2009 I leave everything I said to be compared with actual experiences for you guys to have on your own. Therefore, you are more than welcome to test it out and prove me wrong. If you are seeking dating advice then the best thing you can do is go out in the real world and see which one of these philosophies actually works. I don't claim to be any better than others here posting their advice, but I will say that the other advice being offered here is bullshit because I have tried it myself. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
chasteh 0 #67 July 9, 2009 >The game was invented by women and they make all the rules and the rules change without notice...often. There is at least one perfect example of that in this thread (Hi Rosa! Even more reason to think twice about what they are telling you in an online forum. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
guppie01 0 #68 July 9, 2009 Well, it depends... If the woman is somewhat interested in the man, the advances can be welcome. If the guy is a creep, or the woman is not remotely interested in him - the guy is considered crazy stalkerish. For the record, my husband stalked me for 4 years.... Persistance paid off for him. g "Let's do something romantic this Saturday... how bout we bust out the restraints?" Raddest Ho this side of Jersey #1 - MISS YOU OMG, is she okay? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
anthonyfellows 0 #69 July 9, 2009 Quote I leave everything I said to be compared with actual experiences for you guys to have on your own. Therefore, you are more than welcome to test it out and prove me wrong. If you are seeking dating advice then the best thing you can do is go out in the real world and see which one of these philosophies actually works. I don't claim to be any better than others here posting their advice, but I will say that the other advice being offered here is bullshit because I have tried it myself. Well thanks for offering a book of useless advice for him to read. You were a lot of help Serious relationships turn into work after a few weeks and I already got a fucking job :) ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ H.A.F. = Hard As Fuck ... Goddamn Amateurs Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
chasteh 0 #70 July 9, 2009 Useless? Even if it were bad advice it would still be useful. If he goes out, tries it a few times, and it doesn't work out for him-he will have even better of an idea of what does not work. Thanks for the put down. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Icon134 0 #71 July 9, 2009 I know this question was directed to the women... but as others have mentioned there really is no right or wrong answer to the question being posed... Which some others have alluded to... and the "rules" change from woman to woman and in each individual situation... The best advice anyone can give you is to be yourself... which I'm sure you're doing...Livin' on the Edge... sleeping with my rigger's wife... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
banesanura 1 #72 July 9, 2009 Hey bitch ass. Call me. I'll give you the best advice I'm gonna call you to harass the hell out of you. Best Girl Scout Ever. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
anthonyfellows 0 #73 July 9, 2009 Quote Useless? Even if it were bad advice it would still be useful. If he goes out, tries it a few times, and it doesn't work out for him-he will have even better of an idea of what does not work. Thanks for the put down. No problem. So how many times have you been divorced? Serious relationships turn into work after a few weeks and I already got a fucking job :) ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ H.A.F. = Hard As Fuck ... Goddamn Amateurs Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
anthonyfellows 0 #75 July 9, 2009 Quote None. You? I would have to stop avoiding marriage in order to make it to divorce .. haha You know I'm just screwing with you ... Don't be so offended Serious relationships turn into work after a few weeks and I already got a fucking job :) ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ H.A.F. = Hard As Fuck ... Goddamn Amateurs Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
