prepheckt 0 #1 June 9, 2009 I have a friend who asked me for advice with regard to a situation she's trying to figure out how to handle. She has a client that she works with who's married and has asked her out for a beer after work tomorrow. In addition he's 10+ years older than she is. (She's in her early 20's). He's a client that is traveling to her office for a business orientation. They mainly interact over the phone or e-mail, but have rarely see each other face to face. I said the offer most likely is an attempt to hit on her. She agrees with me, but does not know how she wants to handle the situation because she's attracted to him. I'm throwing this out there for you DZ commers to comment and offer your advice."Dancing Argentine Tango is like doing calculus with your feet." -9 toes Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
skyjumpenfool 2 #2 June 9, 2009 All you have to do is ask yourself... "To what end"? If you’re very clear in your answer to this question, you can make up your own mind. Oh my God, that sounds philosophical! I'm sorry, please disregard this post.Birdshit & Fools Productions "Son, only two things fall from the sky." Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
RkyMtnHigh 0 #3 June 9, 2009 If she wants to go, then be independent and provide her own transportation and pay for her own beer and enjoy the company. However if she feels uneasy and feels like the guy has a motive, then she can elect to not go. Simple as that. _________________________________________ Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
headoverheels 333 #4 June 9, 2009 Quote... She agrees with me, but does not know how she wants to handle the situation because she's attracted to him. He's married. This statement makes her sound like a skank. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
popsjumper 2 #5 June 9, 2009 Politely turn down the offer. Period. No questions asked. No-brainer. This is really cock-block thread, right?My reality and yours are quite different. I think we're all Bozos on this bus. Falcon5232, SCS8170, SCSA353, POPS9398, DS239 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
billeisele 130 #6 June 9, 2009 so it is not possible for a married guy to take a business partner/acquaitance out for a beer without hitting on her?? are we all that worried that everyone out there is an axe murderer?? sure, be careful but only one reason not to go - you said she was attracted to him, if she can't keep her panties on then don't go, it will eventually wreck the business relationship, and there is no way that someone else will not find out - might be possible that he has no other motive except to enjoy her company and build a better business relationship, this is done all the time, the biggest deal I ever closed was with a women in a sports bar - drive herself, she can pick the spot, and tell him ahead of time that she needs to leave at XX PM, possibly bring another business partner or her bossGive one city to the thugs so they can all live together. I vote for Chicago where they have strict gun laws. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
skymama 37 #7 June 9, 2009 Since he's on a business trip, he could just want some company and coversation with a friendly person he knows instead of sitting in his hotel room alone. Just because you have a beer with someone, it doesn't mean you have to fuck. She is Da Man, and you better not mess with Da Man, because she will lay some keepdown on you faster than, well, really fast. ~Billvon Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
SARLDO 0 #8 June 9, 2009 Quote Since he's on a business trip, he could just want some company and coversation with a friendly person he knows instead of sitting in his hotel room alone. Just because you have a beer with someone, it doesn't mean you have to fuck. Right. That would be tequila shots. IMO, if she's attracted to a married man, better to politely decline offer."Always do right. This will gratify some people and astonish the rest" ~Samuel Clemens MB#4300 Dudeist Skydiver #68 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
DJL 235 #9 June 9, 2009 Welcome her to the world of equality. I go out for a beer/coffee/lunch/dinner with many peers in my field; it's standard practice for cordial professional relationships. People who don't do it are doomed to the cubicle farm for their lives."I encourage all awesome dangerous behavior." - Jeffro Fincher Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
DaGimp 0 #10 June 9, 2009 Quote- might be possible that he has no other motive except to enjoy her company and build a better business relationship, this is done all the time, the biggest deal I ever closed was with a women in a sports bar this was gona be exactly my advise.....most business deals now a days are made in bars, on golf courses, over dinners."Professor of Pimpology"~~~Bolas Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
NWFlyer 2 #11 June 9, 2009 Quote(She's in her early 20's). That, right there, is the red flag for me. His motives could be purely professional, but they may not. Knowing how (and wanting to!) extricate yourself from a situation like that is a skill that people in their early 20s may not have. Early in your career you're much more willing to "go along to get along" so that you don't risk your career. It may cause her to let an uncomfortable situation go farther than someone who is a bit more established and secure in their career might. Then you add the fact that she's admitted attraction ... well ... sounds like a potentially bad situation. However, if for professional reasons it's important to spend time with this client, perhaps she can bring along a few other coworkers. It can be very casual, like "It'll be great for you to meet Joe - he handles [X] within the company and Jane is my counterpart in [Y] product.""There is only one basic human right, the right to do as you damn well please. And with it comes the only basic human duty, the duty to take the consequences." -P.J. O'Rourke Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
prepheckt 0 #12 June 9, 2009 Wow, not one vote to screw the guys brains out? What happened to the Bonfire? Where did this sense of morality come from. I don't like it.That being said, I showed my friend the thread, and she said to say: "Tell them that I would treat this situation like I was drinking with a friend and nothing more." IMO, I think it is possible to do this without being compromised, and I actually suggested the "bring a friend defense." More updates to follow. "Dancing Argentine Tango is like doing calculus with your feet." -9 toes Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
kmills0705 0 #13 June 9, 2009 I say ask another co-worker or two to join in on the drinks and make it a group thing. And yes, take that any way you wish!!! Kim Mills USPA D21696 Tandem I, AFF I and Static Line I Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
virgin-burner 1 #14 June 9, 2009 Quote ... - might be possible that he has no other motive except to enjoy her company and build a better business relationship, this is done all the time, the biggest deal I ever closed was with a women in a sports bar ... soliciting is not really considered a business deal, right!? Quote Since he's on a business trip, he could just want some company and coversation with a friendly person he knows instead of sitting in his hotel room alone. Just because you have a beer with someone, it doesn't mean you have to fuck. abso-fucking-lutely!“Some may never live, but the crazy never die.” -Hunter S. Thompson "No. Try not. Do... or do not. There is no try." -Yoda Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
prepheckt 0 #15 June 10, 2009 My friend isn't sure if this is his way of hitting on her or if this is just a casual business thing, but would treat it like a casual business thing."Dancing Argentine Tango is like doing calculus with your feet." -9 toes Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
