Somebody make me LAUGH, dammit!

[Yoshi 0]

So skydiver Joe was always the last bunk mate at boogies because he snored so loudly it sounded like a freight train was pulling into the station. Ever year at this particular boogie the other skydivers would draw straws who would bunk with him...

John drew the short straw the first night and the next morning at breakfeast he had bloodshot eyes, hair all a mess (and yes it was worse than the normal bloodshot eyes and messy hair than the rest of the skydivers)... when asked about his night he said it was horrible! he sat up all night just watching Joe snore as he was amazed that Joe didnt wake himself and didnt get a wink of sleep all night

the second night Frank drew the short straw and the next morning was very similar...when asked about the night (with his super bloodshot eyes and messy hair) he spoke of how disturbing it was that someone could snore that loudly..

on the third night Eli drew the short straw...he was 6'5" 240lbs monster of a marathon hop-n-pop-er...

The next morning Eli came to breakfeast bright eyed and bushy tailed completely refreshed by a great night's sleep... John (the snorer) however came to the breakfeast table with bloodshot eyes, messy hair and complaining of ot getting a wink

When the rest of the skydivers asked Eli about the night and how he was able to get any sleep he replied...Well after hearing your stories right before lights out I went over to John, kissed him on the cheek, pulled his covers up and winked at him...and he stayed up all night watching me!

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this space for rent.

[ACMESkydiver 0]

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You want to have my children.

~Jaye
Do not believe that possibly you can escape the reward of your action.

[ACMESkydiver 0]

I saved the car bailout pic and your bank giveaway for Joe...he loves sending those to his buddies.

~Jaye
Do not believe that possibly you can escape the reward of your action.

[LisaH 0]

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You want to have my children.

That's too cute.

Be yourself!
MooOOooOoo

[LisaH 0]

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You can click on their pictures.

And it's not me. I'm not a cheerleader. Well, I could be if asked nicely. ordered to.

hehe

Be yourself!
MooOOooOoo

[LOSTandCRAZY 0]

Best site ever:

http://www.fart-sounds.net/fart_sound_board.htm

"Get these balls!"

[Bolas 5]

1. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nP-XRg6jGTI
2. No matter what Moshe did in bed, his wife never achieved an orgasm. Since a Jewish wife is entitled to sexual pleasure, they decide to consult their Rabbi.

The Rabbi listens to their story, strokes his beard, and makes the following suggestion:
'Hire a strapping young man. While the two of you are making love, have the young man wave a towel over you. That will help the wife fantasize, and should bring on an orgasm.'

They go home and follow the Rabbi's advice. They hire a handsome young man, and he waves a towel over them as they make love. It doesn't help, and the wife is still unsatisfied.

Perplexed, they go back to the Rabbi.
'Okay,' he says to the husband, 'Try it reversed. Have the young man make love to your wife, and you wave the towel over them.'

Once again, they follow the Rabbi's advice. They go home, and hire the same strapping young man.
The young man gets into bed with the wife, and the husband waves the towel. The wife soon has an enormous, room-shaking, screaming orgasm.
The husband smiles, looks at the young man, and says to him triumphantly: 'You see, you schmuck, THAT'S how you wave a towel!'

Stupidity if left untreated is self-correcting
If ya can't be good, look good, if that fails, make 'em laugh.