Broke 0 #51 November 6, 2008 The sometimes is the important word there. If you leave it out then you is fucked. You can always pretend everything was great with the exception of one or two things that occurred in the evening.Divot your source for all things Hillbilly. Anvil Brother 84 SCR 14192 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
millertime24 8 #52 November 6, 2008 Quote Quote Quote Now if I wasn't married or attached to anybody, she'd be a good fuckbuddy, just as long as she shuts the fuck up. But isnt that the way it usually works? There is a chick that works here in the same building as me and she constantly has an elitist attitude (you know the opinionated bitch that nobody wants to talk to). Not only that but she's pretty much a fatass, and very sensitive about her weight. Anyway, she cought me on a "bad day" (I was pissed because I had to work late and couldnt go jump) and had the nerve to tell me how much of an anit-social prick I was because all I cared about is skydiving. Then I came up with something clever. I told her to go eat another doughnut and leave me the fuck alone (you have to be carefull to to call someone "fat" or you can get into big trouble). I havent had a problem with this person since. Dude! She was telling you she wanted to blow you. Seriously. Some guys are so clueless. Seriously if you saw this chick you wouldnt let anything you cared about within any sort of proximity to her mouth. She's always hungry. She must feed.Muff #5048 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
BillyVance 34 #53 November 6, 2008 Quote You know Ive always wanted to jump at the Farm. Maybe a late winter trip is in order since we dont jump here when its cold... Sounds good to me! Just let me know when!"Mediocre people don't like high achievers, and high achievers don't like mediocre people." - SIX TIME National Champion coach Nick Saban Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
littleskycrab 0 #54 November 6, 2008 HAHAHAHAAAA! You said "listen", that was funny, Billy.Next time a sunrise steals your breath or a meadow of flowers leaves you speechless, remain that way. Say nothing and listen as heaven whispers, "Do you like it? I did it just for you." Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
downwardspiral 0 #55 November 6, 2008 Quote Quote Quote Quote Now if I wasn't married or attached to anybody, she'd be a good fuckbuddy, just as long as she shuts the fuck up. But isnt that the way it usually works? There is a chick that works here in the same building as me and she constantly has an elitist attitude (you know the opinionated bitch that nobody wants to talk to). Not only that but she's pretty much a fatass, and very sensitive about her weight. Anyway, she cought me on a "bad day" (I was pissed because I had to work late and couldnt go jump) and had the nerve to tell me how much of an anit-social prick I was because all I cared about is skydiving. Then I came up with something clever. I told her to go eat another doughnut and leave me the fuck alone (you have to be carefull to to call someone "fat" or you can get into big trouble). I havent had a problem with this person since. Dude! She was telling you she wanted to blow you. Seriously. Some guys are so clueless. Seriously if you saw this chick you wouldnt let anything you cared about within any sort of proximity to her mouth. She's always hungry. She must feed. That just means she likely swallows. Sounds like abonus to me. www.FourWheelerHB.com Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
millertime24 8 #56 November 6, 2008 Quote Quote Quote Quote Quote Now if I wasn't married or attached to anybody, she'd be a good fuckbuddy, just as long as she shuts the fuck up. But isnt that the way it usually works? There is a chick that works here in the same building as me and she constantly has an elitist attitude (you know the opinionated bitch that nobody wants to talk to). Not only that but she's pretty much a fatass, and very sensitive about her weight. Anyway, she cought me on a "bad day" (I was pissed because I had to work late and couldnt go jump) and had the nerve to tell me how much of an anit-social prick I was because all I cared about is skydiving. Then I came up with something clever. I told her to go eat another doughnut and leave me the fuck alone (you have to be carefull to to call someone "fat" or you can get into big trouble). I havent had a problem with this person since. Dude! She was telling you she wanted to blow you. Seriously. Some guys are so clueless. Seriously if you saw this chick you wouldnt let anything you cared about within any sort of proximity to her mouth. She's always hungry. She must feed. That just means she likely swallows. Sounds like abonus to me. I would be more worried that she thinks my dick is a hotdog or something.Muff #5048 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Bolas 5 #57 November 7, 2008 Quote Quote She's being irritating because she sees you as a threat to their friendship. Sit her down and explain that you don't want to come between them because you know that your girlfriend needs someone with whom to share those deep, emotional things that you don't give a shit about. Hit it on the HEAD!!!! He is wise... Stupidity if left untreated is self-correcting If ya can't be good, look good, if that fails, make 'em laugh. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
npgraphicdesign 3 #58 November 7, 2008 Am I the only one that read the thread title as "I'm f%@king my girlfriend's best friend"?? I guess a guy can dream can't he? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Misternatural 0 #59 November 7, 2008 You got any obnoxious buddies who has trouble getting laid whom your wife dislikes? Well invite that dude over when your wife has her she pal visiting and act like it's a big coincidence,bust out the mixed drink cart, then watch the chemistry. Maybe those two will spark up a little wah chika wah wah and cancel out each others noise. Once they get into the tab A into slot B mode you'll never see either of them again- and the balance will be restored at the ol' hacienda, you dig? Beware of the collateralizing and monetization of your desires. D S #3.1415 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
dynamicedge 0 #60 November 7, 2008 I have one extremely obnoxious friend. So obnoxious he pisses even me off most of the time. I recruited him to get that bitch the fuck away from me. I know he'll try cuz he'll fuck a hole in wall if it said his name. If anything, he'll at least make me look good. We'll see if this works.... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
popsjumper 2 #61 November 7, 2008 Quote Ain't it weird how often a good one always hangs out with a bozo one? I think it has to do with self-esteem...on BOTH their parts. The bozo makes the other one look good and the bozo gets to live vicariously through the other....leftovers and all that. THAT explains the friend request I received from you yesterday! Yes, I need a bozo to hang with me. My reality and yours are quite different. I think we're all Bozos on this bus. Falcon5232, SCS8170, SCSA353, POPS9398, DS239 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
popsjumper 2 #62 November 7, 2008 Quote signing with GREAT BIG GESTURES I can picture an irate deaf Italian. Wait...how can you tell when a deaf Italian is irate? I dunno. My reality and yours are quite different. I think we're all Bozos on this bus. Falcon5232, SCS8170, SCSA353, POPS9398, DS239 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
popsjumper 2 #63 November 7, 2008 You still with us here? My reality and yours are quite different. I think we're all Bozos on this bus. Falcon5232, SCS8170, SCSA353, POPS9398, DS239 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
futuredivot 0 #64 November 7, 2008 Quote He is wise... And yet you never fucking listen You are only as strong as the prey you devour Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Misternatural 0 #65 November 7, 2008 >>I have one extremely obnoxious friend. So obnoxious he pisses even me off most of the time. I recruited him to get that bitch the fuck away from me. I know he'll try cuz he'll fuck a hole in wall if it said his name. Bwahhahaha! Excellent, the project is on track then. keep us posted if your buddy succeeds with the shwanzel in the bergoyna procedure. it's usually effective at fending off bitchy wing sistahs. at least temporarily-untill they start fighting,in which case you'll never hear the end of it. Good luck with this mission. Beware of the collateralizing and monetization of your desires. D S #3.1415 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
debussyschild 0 #66 November 7, 2008 Quote So I recently started dating this girl and I can't fucking stand her best friend! We often hang out in a group so I have no choice but to put up with her. She is so fucking goddam annoying and horribly unnattractive (which is fine but she thinks she's so fucking hot) which is not fine). I sometimes wanna rip my left arm off just so I have something to throw at her. I've been able to keep my mouth shut so far but I don't know how much longer I can go. Anyone else been in this situation? Hahaha, that's hilarious. Obviously, not from where you're standing. Hmm... as a girl I'll say kudos to you for keeping your mouth shut. IMHO the VERY LAST thing you should do is tell your g/f that you hate her best friend. That's asking for the boot, not to mention she'll be very hurt by that (somethings are better left unsaid, right?). Buuuuuuuuut, if you just started dating her and you're ALREADY turned off by who she hangs out with, maybe now would be the time to politely peace out. If you can't stand the bff now and you aren't 100% enthralled by your girlfriend, odds are it's going to continue to annoy the crap out of you and you'd be better off dating someone else. I don't know what the situation looks like between you and your g/f, but I can guarantee you one thing: a girl lives and dies by her best friends (usually). If she's really close with them, she will undoubtedly choose them over you. Plain and simple. It is rare when a girl chooses her man over her best friends... those are usually times when something has gone seriously wrong in the relationship, like abuse. I digress...So, ask yourself if it's worth it to stick it out, but try not to let it get personal if that friend becomes really annoying. It's in your best interest to be a gentleman, always"For once you have tasted flight you will walk the earth with your eyes turned skyward, for there you have been and there you will long to return." Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
debussyschild 0 #67 November 7, 2008 Quote She's being irritating because she sees you as a threat to their friendship. Sit her down and explain that you don't want to come between them because you know that your girlfriend needs someone with whom to share those deep, emotional things that you don't give a shit about. Now now now, that's jumping to a conclusion if I ever saw it. Don't be foolish to immediately write people's quarks off as strategic battle maneuvers. And vice versa. If you just started dating this girl, you're going to be put in your place SOOO fast if you try to have a sit down with her best friend. Putting her best friend in her place is not your job... yet. Talk to the g/f FIRST. She's the one who is responsible for talking to her best friend, not you. If she does talk to her and it STILL hasn't worked, then you can ask your g/f if it's ok for you to have a one-on-one with the best friend. If you want to start a WAR, by all means, go ahead and bypass your g/f (who knows her best friend better than you do) and try to remedy the situation yourself. This is just asking for trouble."For once you have tasted flight you will walk the earth with your eyes turned skyward, for there you have been and there you will long to return." Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
debussyschild 0 #68 November 7, 2008 Quote Whats that? You want gratuitous cute puppy pics? Welll ooookay.. just for you. Off topic: cutest puppy ever!!!!"For once you have tasted flight you will walk the earth with your eyes turned skyward, for there you have been and there you will long to return." Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Bolas 5 #69 November 7, 2008 Quote I have one extremely obnoxious friend. So obnoxious he pisses even me off most of the time. I recruited him to get that bitch the fuck away from me. I know he'll try cuz he'll fuck a hole in wall if it said his name. If anything, he'll at least make me look good. We'll see if this works.... Ah the look better by comparison play... Problem is, eventually, that person leaves and the bar goes back up. Stupidity if left untreated is self-correcting If ya can't be good, look good, if that fails, make 'em laugh. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Bolas 5 #70 November 7, 2008 Quote Quote He is wise... And yet you never fucking listen I always listen. Heeding, OTOH... Stupidity if left untreated is self-correcting If ya can't be good, look good, if that fails, make 'em laugh. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Misternatural 0 #71 November 7, 2008 No No No- girl, you're making WAY too much fuckin' sense. Guys don't think like that, we like to get ourselves into maximim trouble and then try to get back out of it, relationships are much more fun like that.Beware of the collateralizing and monetization of your desires. D S #3.1415 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
dynamicedge 0 #72 November 7, 2008 So anyway....my girl and I are going to a comedy club tonight just the two of us. As we all know (well at least me) the drinks flow pretty heavy at comedy clubs. So I thought this would be a good time for my dickhead friend to meet his new "girlfriend". So I told him to call UglyAndAnnoying up and ask her to double with my girl and I. (I can handle one night with her if it means less of her in the future). So he does. She says "I'd love to, blah blah blah blah, hehe". An hour or two later she calls him up and says she can't cuz she has to go to the airport. If you don't already know you need to go to the airport, it's a fucking lie. So I'm wondering if she told my girl, and then my girl said no to this for some reason. so fuck.....back to the drawing board. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
debussyschild 0 #73 November 7, 2008 Quote No No No- girl, you're making WAY too much fuckin' sense. Guys don't think like that, we like to get ourselves into maximim trouble and then try to get back out of it, relationships are much more fun like that. Hmm...... I could see how sacrificing simple logic for unabated and unadulterated adventure would be damn exciting........let's just keep that philosophy far, far away from skydiving "For once you have tasted flight you will walk the earth with your eyes turned skyward, for there you have been and there you will long to return." Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Misternatural 0 #74 November 7, 2008 >>So I thought this would be a good time for my dickhead friend to meet his new "girlfriend" AHAHAHAHA! thats genius! -however it's just like women to counter all our evil plans with a goddam conspiracy of their own. but i'm tellin ya it's got to be a "coincidence" to work- i find if you let them think about it too much they will put the kaibosh on all your masterpieces. and your weekends will be forever ruined. it's a process. Beware of the collateralizing and monetization of your desires. D S #3.1415 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
dynamicedge 0 #75 November 7, 2008 Not 'forever'. Maybe temporarily. I really just need to get through the winter till skydiving season starts up again. Then my weekends are all booked up anyway and nobody will want to date me since on weekdays I just like to come home from work and lay on my couch naked eating blueberries till a pass out. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
