bigbearfng 18 #1 October 11, 2008 A person you've shared the sky with........ And all you can do is watch and start to mutter "cutaway"....."do something"....... And then yell to call 911 and head out there..... And there's still not a damn thing you can do.... Seems you always look at fatalities and say " hey I maintain my gear so that'll never happen to me" or "I don't swoop so that'll never happen to me". But then there's the one's that, "Ya it sure as hell could happen to me too and wouldn't be a damn thing I could do about it." This sport is my therapy and I'm not about to give it up, but some days it sure makes you think about a lotta shit......... Sorry, I'm just rambling here, but seems to help.... BSBD Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
CSpenceFLY 1 #2 October 11, 2008 I have never looked at anything in this sport and said "That could never happen to me". Well, except for the things I don't do,tandems,wingsuit,CRW. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
NWFlyer 2 #3 October 11, 2008 I'm sorry you had to watch that. That had to suck. Take care of yourself. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
travelingmack 0 #4 October 11, 2008 Quote And there's still not a damn thing you can do.... ...nope, there are nothing you could do about it, if this is a close friend of you..you could only use time to heal your pain and your grief... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
VanillaSkyGirl 6 #5 October 11, 2008 I'm sorry that you had to see that. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
bigbearfng 18 #6 October 12, 2008 Quote I'm sorry that you had to see that. I'm sorry that I could only watch and not be able to do anything......You feel frustratingly useless......... I know the saying that you have no friends below 2000ft....... And despite all the critizism that instructors have been given when chasing a student low, I can begin to understand those instructors....... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
swovelin 11 #7 October 12, 2008 Pete: No. you are not rambling. I'm glad that you took the time to organize and communicate your thoughts and feelings on this terrible day. There really is relief in 'getting things off your chest,' saying right out loud the things that are sometimes the hardest to say. We are all feeling a bit sad & helpless in times like these. Hold fast to the good memories. Harry was a good man and right at this moment many, many people are holding him fondly in their thoughts. Peace, Jerry Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
AggieDave 6 #8 October 12, 2008 I'm sorry you had to witness that. Hopefully it was your first. Be wary of the signs of PTSD. Sure it effects people that have gone to war, but it effects every person after a traumatic event. Its something that may effect you, even if only a little, after an event such as this. What really sucks, is that after time these sorts of incidents tend to numb you out to where even when you're loosing friends. --"When I die, may I be surrounded by scattered chrome and burning gasoline." Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Nightingale 0 #9 October 12, 2008 Quote And there's still not a damn thing you can do.... You did do something. You were there. You were telling people to call 911. You headed out there, knowing what you were probably going to see, but you went anyway. You did what you could to be there for him. Harry was important to so many people here and he was my friend, and I'm grateful that he had someone there trying to look out for him. Thank you for doing what you could. Nightingale Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Amazon 7 #10 October 12, 2008 Quote nope, there are nothing you could do about it, if this is a close friend of you..you could only use time to heal your pain and your grief... Its been 32 years since I saw my first. I can still see the color of his canopy... the color of the sky... the sounds of everyone watching and shouting.. and the sounds of the final moment of his life as if it were just a few minutes ago.You do move on.. but I do think it is far worse for those who have watched than if it was you yourself in that moment. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
diablopilot 2 #11 October 12, 2008 Ramble away, it helps. And it is one of the toughest things I've EVER dealt with. To watch and feel so helpless. To arrive at the scene and know there is nothing you can do to help. To relive the image in your minds eye. Time helps, and I find sharing good stories with your friends helps too. On the other note, I have always know I can do EVERYTHING right and still get bit. It's the other half of that "Blue Skies" coin...... Take care of yourself friend....---------------------------------------------- You're not as good as you think you are. Seriously. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
mrwrong 0 #12 October 12, 2008 So sorry for you and the fact that you had to watch him go down Take care and ramble away if it helps. “The sum of intelligence on the planet is a constant; the population is growing.” - George Bernard Shaw He who dies with the most toys, wins..... dudeist skydiver # 19515 Buy quality and cry once! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
bigbearfng 18 #13 October 12, 2008 I greatly appreciate everyones thoughts. But please no sorrys for me... Some more rambling now. I've come to terms with my own mortality, and I'm good with it if I die tomorrow. But it gets to me when someone else goes. I want to do something!!! And I worry like hell about my friends that are students and newbs, especially when they started skydiving because of me........I can't help but feel responsible-just me. I realize that skydiving is not the safest sport, and as is always stated in these forums-if you keep jumping you will lose friends to the sport. But skydiving and the dz has always been the place where I can clear my brain out and mentally recharge. I know it may sound ridiculous to some, but this sport certainly helped me cope with bringing first my mom and then my dad home on hospice. So now I'm finding I need to integrate the harsh reality of the sport with my feeling of the dz as a refuge of sorts.... So to the oldtimers here, is this kind of a natural progression/realization that most hit? I'll not stop jumping, it is my therapy-as hokey as that may sound, it works for me. Thanks for listening. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Genn 0 #14 October 12, 2008 The sound is something I will never forget. Especially when I knew if was by bf crash/landing. Running to the scene as fast as you can. Holding the persons hand, telling them everything will be OK. Getting your head together, geting the insurance card, etc. Getting to the hospital asap. It's not easy and it is part of the sport. QuoteAnd I worry like hell about my friends that are students and newbs, especially when they started skydiving because of me........I can't help but feel responsible-just me. I stopped doing that a long time ago. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Andy_Copland 0 #15 October 12, 2008 I don't ever want to go through it again, i know that much. I have our picture next to my desk and i can't help but look at it sometimes and remember his final moments, while cradling a beer in my fist.1338 People aint made of nothin' but water and shit. Until morale improves, the beatings will continue. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
airdvr 210 #16 October 12, 2008 Turning points...crossroads...call it whatever you want. Everyone who stays in the sport for more than a couple of seasons will see something like this. For me, it took the shine off the penny for awhile. After a little bit it got better. WHen I started people told me "fear is replaced by knowledge". Later I learned that, with enough knowledge about the possibilities fear can creep back into the picture. It does get better.Please don't dent the planet. Destinations by Roxanne Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
bigbearfng 18 #17 October 12, 2008 it took the shine off the penny __________________________________________________ I wasn't sure I was making sense. Thanks for finding some clarifying words. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
warpedskydiver 0 #18 October 12, 2008 I am sorry for anyone having to watch someone die, you never forget it and seldom get over it. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
JohnMitchell 16 #19 October 13, 2008 I agree with Dave that you'll want to watch for signs of PTSD. I know I've gone through it. Sorry about your friend. It is a helpless feeling, isn't it. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
BillyVance 34 #20 October 13, 2008 Quote I agree with Dave that you'll want to watch for signs of PTSD. I know I've gone through it. Sorry about your friend. It is a helpless feeling, isn't it. Same here... It sucks. I still think about that day more than 11 1/2 years ago. Only difference is I was involved in a canopy collision and I watched the other guy streamer in. I dealt with it by jumping my ass off that year and remembering why it happened so I would not let it happen again. But that's not the only one I've seen go in. I saw two at Quincy '97 that same year. "Mediocre people don't like high achievers, and high achievers don't like mediocre people." - SIX TIME National Champion coach Nick Saban Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
The_Don 0 #21 October 13, 2008 I agree. I am NOT being loud. I'm being enthusiastic! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
parachutist 2 #22 October 13, 2008 QuoteI have never looked at anything in this sport and said "That could never happen to me". Well, except for the things I don't do,tandems,wingsuit,CRW. Idunno Chris, lately a few people who never intended to try CRW got some really hard docks. With fast canopies in the air above you there are no guarantees you won't be doing CRW at some point. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
jamiem 1 #24 October 13, 2008 Quote >> I agree with the This is my second season ending and I have not seen it yet. I dread the day and I worry how it will effect me and how I view the sky. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Amazon 7 #25 October 13, 2008 Quote I agree with the This is my second season ending and I have not seen it yet. I dread the day and I worry how it will effect me and how I view the sky. Turn your back...put your fingers in your ears and go NANANANANANANANANANANANANANANAIf you have to watch...you will remember all of the sights and sounds for a lifetime. I saw a cutaway at LP this year where the jumper did a whole lot of in the air rigging.. THEN choppped and dropped and dropped and dropped..... and opened very low... I had already turned around and did not watch.. I did not want to see it. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
