happythoughts 0 #1 May 27, 2008 My friend just called me up because of a difficult end to a relationship. How did it happen? An acquaintance of theirs met their SO. Then, a friend of the acquaintance is visiting town, or looking, or unattached. "Know anyone single? Help me out?" For any variety of incredibly selfish reasons, the acquaintance, who neither respect or values them, makes a call. "I have this friend who wants to meet you." Response, "I'm dating someone (that you know and trusts you)." "Oh... it's not really a date. It's just lunch/a couple of drinks/a movie." (Uh-huh...) "Besides... you are seriously dating." "Well, ok, but just for a couple of drinks." Making a long story short, breakup. Who caused it? The instigator? Who applied social pressure? The Enabler? If you've done that before, while "helping a friend out". If you've been the initial domino that broke up a relationship, you are not a friend. Also, don't ever bitch about the lack of trust that people have for relationships. It's your fault. This has happened to me before, and I just listened to my friend in pain for 45 minutes. My wish for everyone is that they have friends exactly like them. It's a wonderful blessing or a brutal curse, depending on their character. Rant over. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
cocheese 0 #2 May 27, 2008 If there is a female involved in all this, can i have her number? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
happythoughts 0 #3 May 27, 2008 Quote If there is a female involved in all this, can i have her number? I am waiting to find a nice girl who can appreciate you. You'll get a great recommendation. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
cocheese 0 #4 May 27, 2008 I'm running out of time,bro. but thanks for watching out for me. If you find one good enough for me, you better keep her. Take care of yourself. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
happythoughts 0 #5 May 27, 2008 Quote I'm running out of time,bro. but thanks for watching out for me. If you find one good enough for me, you better keep her. Take care of yourself. Dating me would qualify as the "curse" part of the equation. I'm not really b/f material. Skydiving and hanging out is all I need to be doing. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
cocheese 0 #6 May 27, 2008 me too. Who has time or money for relationships? I'll teach ya how to sit fly if you can teach me how to not go low on a big way. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
happythoughts 0 #7 May 27, 2008 Quote me too. Who has time or money for relationships? I'll teach ya how to sit fly if you can teach me how to not go low on a big way. I have two solutions. One, I'm always an attachment point on the base. Can't go low on the base if you are the base.Two, a month ago, I spent an hour in the tunnel with Sally on that very point. Went up and down very fast and learned better brakes. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
cocheese 0 #8 May 27, 2008 I need new brake pads? already? But I'm still under warranty and i've been babying them.Admit it, you just wanted to fly with Sally for an hour....and go up and down very fast. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
JohnMitchell 16 #9 May 27, 2008 Quote I am waiting to find a nice girl who can appreciate you. I think he needs a bad girl that can appreciate him. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
RkyMtnHigh 0 #10 May 27, 2008 Awwwwwwwww...this is so cool watching male bonding take place on here. _________________________________________ Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
chinagirl 0 #11 May 27, 2008 Quote Dating me would qualify as the "curse" part of the equation. I'm not really b/f material. Skydiving and hanging out is all I need to be doing. Why aren't there more girls like you guys who are only interested in casual "dating" (aka fuck and just leave)? My boyfriend needs an outlet when I can't be available...~Built for Abuse www.skydivethefarm.com Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Whiskeyboi 0 #12 May 27, 2008 Quote Why aren't there more girls like you guys who are only interested in casual "dating" (aka fuck and just leave)? My boyfriend needs an outlet when I can't be available... Oh, there are plenty of women like that. I seem to end up dating them...sadly, I figure it out AFTER we've dated. (Think I could write a book on being used as a rebound guy.) Maybe I should sell pics and phone numbers to the highest bidder... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
happythoughts 0 #13 May 27, 2008 Quote Quote Dating me would qualify as the "curse" part of the equation. I'm not really b/f material. Skydiving and hanging out is all I need to be doing. Why aren't there more girls like you guys who are only interested in casual "dating" (aka fuck and just leave)? My boyfriend needs an outlet when I can't be available... Cocheese is more interested in dating a girl for a relationship. He would treat them too well though. I'm not really interested in the boyfriend title because I'm just not cut out for it. No point in tormenting some nice girl. Most of my buddies are great guys, but are jealously guarded by girlfriends already. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
chinagirl 0 #14 May 27, 2008 Quote Oh, there are plenty of women like that. I seem to end up dating them...sadly, I figure it out AFTER we've dated. (Think I could write a book on being used as a rebound guy.) Maybe I should sell pics and phone numbers to the highest bidder... That's just perfect. Be nice and share!!!~Built for Abuse www.skydivethefarm.com Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
tigra 0 #15 May 27, 2008 Your story made me dizzy but........ If the girl was that quick to go out on a date with some other guy (even if it was a "non-date") then she and your friend probably didn't have much going on to begin with. Blame the instigator all you want but SHE took the bait. He's better off and maybe he ought to thank domino number 1. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
downwardspiral 0 #16 May 27, 2008 Quote Your story made me dizzy but........ If the girl was that quick to go out on a date with some other guy (even if it was a "non-date") then she and your friend probably didn't have much going on to begin with. Blame the instigator all you want but SHE took the bait. He's better off and maybe he ought to thank domino number 1. lol that's what I was thinking. Its her fault for accepting the date to begin with. However, if one of my friends were to call up my gf and ask her to take a dude out on a "non-date", I would beat his ass whether or not my gf accepted. www.FourWheelerHB.com Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
happythoughts 0 #17 May 28, 2008 QuoteIts her fault for accepting the date to begin with. However, if one of my friends were to call up my gf and ask her to take a dude out on a "non-date", I would beat his ass whether or not my gf accepted. Women apply a lot of social pressure when they want something. Even if it is something stupid like getting invited to a party at a cool condo. "Yeah, he's renting the place. He's from out of town. Bring a friend for my friend..." Some people sell it surprisingly well for the stupidest of agendas. I was just pointing out the irony of the people who complain that they can't find a good relationship, but they're the ones destroying them. "Yeah, he just wants to talk. He asked for your phone number..." "It's not like you are seriously dating yet... and he has a hot car." Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
tigra 0 #18 May 28, 2008 It really doesn't matter what kind of "pressure" was applied or the reasons behind it. The person who accepted the blind date with the friend of the acquaintance is the one who blew the relationship she (or he) was in. Then again, now you're making it sound like all she did was go to a party, in which case something may have gotten totally blown out of proportion and SHE's the one who is better off without the jealous control freak. Its kind of hard to tell from your post, you know? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
happythoughts 0 #19 May 28, 2008 QuoteThen again, now you're making it sound like all she did was go to a party, in which case something may have gotten totally blown out of proportion and SHE's the one who is better off without the jealous control freak. Its kind of hard to tell from your post, you know? I haven't been describing "just a little innocent fun...". I described an intention to subvert a relationship. Start to finish, that is the plan. An unconcern about the value of the relationship of another. It is an action. People should accept responsibility for their actions. I have just been describing the "prime mover". The push of the first domino of events that leads down a long path. The end of the relationship is the end of that story. I've seen this more than once. I just mentioned an example. This is how it starts. No, I didn't provide blow-by-blow details of the entire ordeal. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
mnealtx 0 #20 May 28, 2008 I don't disagree that the enabler is the first domino..... but in this case, the *SECOND* domino has a choice whether or not to 'fall', so to speak...Mike I love you, Shannon and Jim. POPS 9708 , SCR 14706 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
happythoughts 0 #21 May 28, 2008 Quote I don't disagree that the enabler is the first domino..... but in this case, the *SECOND* domino has a choice whether or not to 'fall', so to speak... Certainly. If someone is dating a decent person and someone else talks them into backstabbing that decent person, then they are a dumbass. Also, these are not drug freaks, their judgment is always suspect. A person who does drugs can be talked into anything for free drugs. "A party at the beach with big piles of coke? Race you to the car..." Just normal people. What makes me laugh is that there will be apologists for the enabler. Somehow it wasn't their fault. "If the other person had values, they wouldn't have been talked into it." That is the excuse of every confidence man in the world. Paraphrased as, "You can't cheat (corrupt) an honest man." Trying to rationalize the intent of f-ing over your friends? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
mnealtx 0 #22 May 28, 2008 QuoteTrying to rationalize the intent of f-ing over your friends? Not at all - I think it's a shitty thing to do. I merely make the point that 'it takes two to tango', that is all.Mike I love you, Shannon and Jim. POPS 9708 , SCR 14706 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
JohnMitchell 16 #23 May 28, 2008 Quote Not at all - I think it's a shitty thing to do. I merely make the point that 'it takes two to tango', that is all. Absolutely. Who wants a relationship with someone who strays so easily? Your friend is lucky to find out earlier instead of later. When someone finally commits, they don't stray away. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
tigra 0 #24 May 28, 2008 I don't doubt there are so called "friends" who sabotage relationships, but a stable relationship isn't going to be destroyed as easily as what you described. And the "friends" that do that are usually way more subtle than setting up a friend's SO with another guy. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
lilDevil 2 #25 May 28, 2008 Thats just shit ! He wasnt a friend or he wouldnt have called, All she had to do was say NO Why do people have trust issues ??? SEE ABOVE POST !``````````````````````````````````` " Cant keep a good woman down " Angels have wings, but devils can fly ! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
