prepheckt 0 #1 March 9, 2008 I attended a performance of Die Zuberflote performed by the Phoenix Opera Company last night. It was an excellent performance; the acting and singing was beautiful. I swear the man playing Sarastro had a subwoofer implanted in his larynx....he was making the floor rumble everytime he hit low notes. He almost made Barry Manilow look like a castrato. Anyhow, during Act II, the Queen of the Night, tells her Pamina that she will disown her if she does not kill Sarastro. Talk about cold blooded. This got me thinking..... FOCUS: Are there any circumstances in which disowning your child is called for? I would say no, but I'm not a parent, and I've never made anyone that mad."Dancing Argentine Tango is like doing calculus with your feet." -9 toes Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
dannydan 5 #2 March 9, 2008 Quote FOCUS: Are there any circumstances in which disowning your child is called for? Lots of circunstances for saying it... Meaning it and then acting on this "ULTAMATUM" are entirely two different ideals!!! Typically said to get them (the children) to wake their lil ass uP and see REALITY!!! I have said it and later within the hour appologized for saying it because 1- I knew I could never actually carry it out and 2-She knew that deep down I didnt really mean it! Did it change what my daughter was/is doing that displeases me so? NOPE!! She knows that it is "Her bed that She is making" for Herself and that I am dissapointed.... Some disresecpt against me, but then again She is a person (17yoa) so in her eyes I am disrespecting her life.... CATCH 22 and it CAN totally suck being "a parent" sometimes.... But 99% of the time it is and has been AWESOME watching these weeds grow with a lil pruning along the way. I have really GREAT, FANTABULOUS WONDERFUL etc daughters! I am a VERY blessed father!!! THANK YOU God, Jesus and MY holy spirit.... Oh and Kelly (their Mother) and to ALL the peeps that helped ME along my trials and tribulations!!! peace and happy hairbrush on the buttocks!!:dd Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
mamajumps 0 #3 March 9, 2008 There isn't anything that my kids could ever do to cause that! I might not always like them and the choices they make, but I will ALWAYS love them and be there for them... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Squeak 17 #4 March 9, 2008 Quote..... FOCUS: Are there any circumstances in which disowning your child is called for? I would say no, but I'm not a parent, and I've never made anyone that mad. I dont think dis-owning them is what i would call it. But there are times when i can see parents, cutting off all ties and assistance with their older offspring, in order to help them.You are not now, nor will you ever be, good enough to not die in this sport (Sparky) My Life ROCKS! How's yours doing? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
peregrinerose 0 #5 March 9, 2008 My parents dis-owned me because I left the Catholic Church. Do or do not, there is no try -Yoda Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Lindsey 0 #6 March 9, 2008 Have they started owning you again? linz-- A conservative is just a liberal who's been mugged. A liberal is just a conservative who's been to jail Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
SkydiveStMarys 0 #7 March 10, 2008 Totally agree. Drug addiction, alcohol abuse...yep I don't want to be an enabler. BobbiA miracle is not defined by an event. A miracle is defined by gratitude. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
prepheckt 0 #8 March 10, 2008 QuoteI dont think dis-owning them is what i would call it. But there are times when i can see parents, cutting off all ties and assistance with their older offspring, in order to help them. Isn't that the definition of disowning??"Dancing Argentine Tango is like doing calculus with your feet." -9 toes Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Squeak 17 #9 March 10, 2008 QuoteQuoteI dont think dis-owning them is what i would call it. But there are times when i can see parents, cutting off all ties and assistance with their older offspring, in order to help them. Isn't that the definition of disowning??might be your definition but it's not mineYou are not now, nor will you ever be, good enough to not die in this sport (Sparky) My Life ROCKS! How's yours doing? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
kbordson 8 #10 March 10, 2008 "Disowning" to me means no longer acknowledging the child as yours, not just cutting off support - financial, material and emotional. If the child does something (drug addictions for example) and as a parent, money is pulled so as not to enable that behavior. That is not disowning. Then the child starts stealing from parents so as a consequence, the child is kicked out and material support is removed. That is still not disowning. Then if the child tries to manipulate with guilt in an attempt to regain that necessary funding and support.... the parent has to set limits on those emotion - "I still love you Susie, but I can not support this until you get help." That still is not disowning. Sometimes being a parent is really tough. But "disowning" a child should be something that no parents ever should do (except maybe Dahlmers mom.... but even then... she probably still loves him) Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
dannydan 5 #11 March 10, 2008 thank you Doc for expalining what I was trying to... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
peregrinerose 0 #12 March 10, 2008 QuoteHave they started owning you again? linz Nope. I doubt they ever will. I can't say I'm all that upset about it since I left home at 17 (extremely abusive mother... physically, sexually, emotionally... it was bad). I went to my grandfather's funeral and my father was introducing my brother to distant family members, with me standing beside my brother, he totally ignored the fact I was there, refused to acknowledge me as his daughter. That stung a little. Do or do not, there is no try -Yoda Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
lisamariewillbe 1 #13 March 10, 2008 QuoteI might not always like them and the choices they make That seems a bit harsh Misty, I always love and like my children, just not always the behaviours or choices they make.Sudsy Fist: i don't think i'd ever say this Sudsy Fist: but you're looking damn sudsydoable in this Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
sharimcm 0 #14 March 10, 2008 My uncle disowned my cousin for being gay. He'll talk about his daughter all day long, but when you ask him about his son, he'll give you a blank stare, then look confused. In his mind, he doesn't even have a son. Sad. "I had a dude tip his black cowboy hat to me after I provided him with a condom outside my hotel room at 3-something in the morning." -myself Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
piratemike 0 #15 March 10, 2008 Quote My parents dis-owned me because I left the Catholic Church. Wow. That's WAY not okay. That must have been hard for you to work through. I'm sorry to hear that some people can treat their children in such a deplorable fashion. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
SivaGanesha 2 #16 March 10, 2008 Quote Quote My parents dis-owned me because I left the Catholic Church. Wow. That's WAY not okay. That must have been hard for you to work through. I'm sorry to hear that some people can treat their children in such a deplorable fashion. Disowning kids seems to be a great family tradition in my family. One of my aunts disowned all three of her daughters for reasons that remain rather hard to understand. Another of my aunts disowned one of her sons when said son started dressing up in women's clothes and announced he preferred to be thought of as a daughter rather than a son. My mother hasn't exactly disowned me but she, my brother, and my sister-in-law all think I'm on a one-way ticket to hell because I haven't accepted their version of who Jesus was. It's kind of sad because my family used to support me absolutely in everything I did--even skydiving--but when they went off in a different direction than I was comfortable with where the Jesus dude was concerned, all hell (pun intended) broke loose. No one would even sit beside me at my mother's wedding (remarriage) or my (paternal) grandmother's funeral. Again, it's rather sad because my family used to be so close--but somehow they got into this whole disowning thing awhile back."It's hard to have fun at 4-way unless your whole team gets down to the ground safely to do it again!"--Northern California Skydiving League re USPA Safety Day, March 8, 2014 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
BillyVance 34 #17 March 10, 2008 My friend just had a baby last Wednesday morning. She's a lesbian and she had a sperm donor from a sperm bank. I went to see her and the baby the next day. She told me that her father, who she hadn't seen or talked to in 10 years, came down to see her baby while she was still in recovery, but never bothered to see her. That stung her a bit... She figured her dad just wanted to see if the baby looked normal. "Mediocre people don't like high achievers, and high achievers don't like mediocre people." - SIX TIME National Champion coach Nick Saban Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
