How to get back at a jerk

[Twoply 0]

Take a weight used for balancing tires and install it on one of the rear tires of their vehicle.
It makes the car shake terribly as long as you dont use more than a half ounce.

Or just poke them in the eye.

[dannydan 5]

I could input some fantastic ideas, but w/o naming names, what did this "jerk" do?

[jtval 0]

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I could input some fantastic ideas, but w/o naming names, what did this "jerk" do?

I'm guessing he found an extra weight on his tire.

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[airdvr 210]

Go to Border's or Barnes & Noble. Go to the magazine section and take those little subscription things outof magazines you know this person would hate. Check the "bill me later" box. Fill them out and throw them in a mailbox.

They'll be forever trying to stop the madness...muwahahaha!

Please don't dent the planet.

Destinations by Roxanne

[JoeyRamone 0]

Order 20 yards of dirt or gravel, pay for it and have it dumped in his/her driveway.

[masterrig 1]

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Order 20 yards of dirt or gravel, pay for it and have it dumped in his/her driveway.

It'd be just his 'luck' that the guy was needing some good dirt or gravel. Maybe... empty all hiss trash in the guy's drive-way!


Chuck

[warpedskydiver 0]

Coyote urine down the front vents at the bottom of the windshield works, so does stinkbait.

[Lastchance 0]

I'm going to remember that one.

I may be getting old but I got to see all the cool bands.

[livendive 8]

Quote

Go to Border's or Barnes & Noble. Go to the magazine section and take those little subscription things outof magazines you know this person would hate. Check the "bill me later" box. Fill them out and throw them in a mailbox.

They'll be forever trying to stop the madness...muwahahaha!

Border's and Barnes & Noble don't have the right inventory. To really get someone, do the above with the most offensive magazines at the local porn shop. When the mark's mailman and family see he's ordered a subscription to "Big & Beefy Gay Bondage", he'll have some 'splainin to do.

Blues,
Dave

"I AM A PROFESSIONAL EXTREME ATHLETE!"
(drink Mountain Dew)

[P.F. 0]

Duct tape his hands and feet, tie a rope around his goodies, throw the rope over something high like a branch in a tree, tie the other end to the bumper of a running car, put the car in drive, sit in the car with your foot on the brake, start drinking a bottle of Tequila!!!!!!

http://home.comcast.net/~thefishwrapper

[drdive 0]

Border's and Barnes & Noble don't have the right inventory. To really get someone, do the above with the most offensive magazines at the local porn shop. When the mark's mailman and family see he's ordered a subscription to "Big & Beefy Gay Bondage", he'll have some 'splainin to do.

Blues,
Dave

Come on Dave, how do you know about "Big and Beefy Gay Bondage Magazine"???

"We saved your gear. Now you can sell it when you get out of the hospital and upsize!!" "K-Dub"

"

[livendive 8]

Quote

Border's and Barnes & Noble don't have the right inventory. To really get someone, do the above with the most offensive magazines at the local porn shop. When the mark's mailman and family see he's ordered a subscription to "Big & Beefy Gay Bondage", he'll have some 'splainin to do.

Blues,
Dave

Come on Dave, how do you know about "Big and Beefy Gay Bondage Magazine"???

From browsing at Castle looking for just the right subsription for you. No need to thank me now, you can do that after you've gotten your third or fourth issue.

Blues,
Dave

"I AM A PROFESSIONAL EXTREME ATHLETE!"
(drink Mountain Dew)

[lawrocket 3]

There are loads of things to do with cars.

Possibly the most annoying is to put a slight crimp in the fuel line. It won't kill the car - just the power. And it'll take a while to figure it out.

You can get more in-your-face annoying, too. Just about any substance put on an engine will cause a stink. Lunch meats, etc. Milk-based substances also give quite a stink. If the person has REALLY wronged you, try a few drops of hunting lure on the engine.

Or, if you want to give a gift that will give later on, file a nut round. Apply some Loc-Tite to the filed lug nut for an added bonus if he really deserves it, For more instant gratification, cut the valve stem (don't mess with tires - those are expensive. A low financial cost (to the mark), high-annoyance thing to do.

My wife is hotter than your wife.

[Brains 2]

As a lawyer, should you really be putting all this out there?

Never look down on someone, unless they are going down on you.

[lawrocket 3]

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As a lawyer, should you really be putting all this out there?

I do advise against doing things like that. However, if his mind is set, he might as well make it good.

Of course, the first rule has been violated - keep your mouth shut.

My wife is hotter than your wife.

[freefal 0]

Get a nice warm pile of fresh doggie do from the park... preferably that slighty green kind that's alittle wet... and wipe it under Mr. Jerl's car door handle. It's quick and easy... and you definately won't catch him biting his nails any time soon!

"Ignorance is bliss" and "Patience is a virtue"... So if you're stupid and don't mind waiting around for a while, I guess you can have a pretty good life!

[dannydan 5]

I am pretty damn sure that I do NOT want to become one of these jerks to ANY of you f&CkeRs...

I am busting over a few of these... esp the crimp in the fuel line!!! Damn it....

[keka 0]

How to get back at a jerk?

have you tried "jerking"off on him?

dunno..for reall... out of ideas today

http://www.woundedwarriorproject.org
PMS#551
I love my life :)

[livendive 8]

Put an ad in the paper for a yard sale at his address both days next weekend, along with something like "Items will be in back yard, just come through gate". If you list an 8 o'clock start, he'll have people wandering through his yard by 6 AM. If he lives in an apartment, call it an "estate sale" or "moving sale" with lots of very underpriced items like beds, appliances, flatscreen TV, etc...they'll be knocking on his door early and often.

Blues,
Dave

"I AM A PROFESSIONAL EXTREME ATHLETE!"
(drink Mountain Dew)

[masterrig 1]

Can't beat 'stink bait'! Shove a potatoe up his tailpipe! Doggy poo on his manifold!


Chuck

[skyjumpsteve 0]

I didn't understand the "coyote urine" comment until I googled it and discovered it is sold all over the place as an animal repellent. A gallon is $148 from Yardiac...or for the low low price of $39.95 you can get a quart! Wow....that stuff is expensive!

[masterrig 1]

...and it works! When I was driving trucks, over the road, I got behind a 'bull-wagon' and before I got around him... one of the cattle peed and it blew all over my windshield. Moral of the story... if, that happens... don't use your windshield wipers! It's like smearing milk.


Chuck

[Brains 2]

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...or for the low low price of $39.95 you can get a quart! Wow....that stuff is expensive!

Ever tried collecting urine from a coyote??

Never look down on someone, unless they are going down on you.

[ACMESkydiver 0]

I posted this quite some time ago when someone asked about how people deal with anger...this was my response. Maybe it will help:

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'Acme's Patented Anger Management Course':

Here's how I deal with anger:

I cuss out the individual I'm angry at. Then I call and cuss out their mother, father, sisters, brothers, children, employers, employees, doctor, 5th grade school teacher, mailman, creditors, pastor, dry cleaner, and the girl at the coffee shop that served them their last Venti Mocha with whip.

I call and order 50 pizzas to be delivered COD to their home. I put out a neighborhood watch for a level 4 sex offender living at their address. I give collection agencies their home phone number. I list their phone number in 'Who's Who' porn conventions.

I give their address to Jehova's witnesses and LDS. I call the local news stations and tell them of breaking news public indeceny occuring at their home address. I put them on every 'Do you know anyone that could benefit from our services?' questionnaire from every company I have ever dealt with.

I call every national charity for MS, Heart Disease, Cancer, Firefighters, Law Enforcement, Veterans, Mentally Retarded, Cerebral Palsy, Girl and Boy Scouts, Autism, Shrine Templers, and tell them that this person was excited about making a $1,000 donation to their cause, "...but be persistent, because they screen calls for sales people."

Then I call Kirby and request a free demo in their home. I call the local Avon and Mary Kay reps and schedule in-home consultations for the same one hour block for both reps in that person's home. I put out flyers in the local grade schools announcing that person's address and that they would LOVE to help out the school's fund raiser for cookie dough or wrapping paper or whatever the hell they are doing.

Then I break into their home and leave a 'positive' pregnancy test in their master bathroom and a bottle of cheap cologne in the husband's medicine cabinet. I leave an obnoxious shade of lipstick in the wife's cosmetics bag. I fax their picture to every major bank within a 25 square mile radius and list them as bank robbers on the run.

I make every aspect of their life into a living hell until they beg forgiveness for pissing me off.

...but the tire thing sounds good, too. I might add that to my list.

~Jaye
Do not believe that possibly you can escape the reward of your action.

[mamajumps 0]

Valve stem pullers are very handy little tools, I keep one in my glove box...

not that I would ever use it to get back at someone or anything....