ACMESkydiver 0 #1 August 17, 2007 Kind of a 'wingless' wingman...woman...whatever the f*ck. I'm in a bar last night with my single girlfriend and we are surrounded by pretentious, arrogant douche-nozzles that are all attempting (unsuccessfully) to impress each other and convince each other of their status. I'm sitting on a bar stool next to my girl friend who's trying to hook up with one of these douche-nozzles. She's getting loaded, I'm sipping my one Mojito and drinking more coffee (I can tell I'll be driving tonight! ). It's hard not to laugh as you hear these guys talking, "I have a Masters in Business from blah blah blah...I'm a blah blah blah, I have blah blah blah...what degrees do you hold?" -Nobody is listening to what anyone else is saying; they're just all trying to be the 'big man'. I'm nearly crying in my coffee I'm laughing so hard...texting Joe and telling him about this 'singles' mixer that I was invited to for business contacts. I'm handing out business cards, I'm collecting business cards, so it's all good! Gyad, then I gotta do the job I was brought here for...my girl friend gets up to go use the restroom, and the guys start asking me about her..."She's so much fun to go out with, she's a real estate investor, she's been a residential realtor for years, she's moving into commercial...she was president of this that and the other business association...blah blah blah..." My friend is beautiful. No, I don't mean 'in my eyes', I mean she was a Miller girl in college, is about 5'6", a 25" wiast and DD's. She has a perfect face with long dark hair and hazel eyes. She's freaking beautiful. And she's now loaded. -So what do these guys do...? They fucking ignore her and continue trying to impress each other with their credentials! H - E - L - L - O ?!?!? Oh well, I tried...my friend asks anyone if they want to join us for dinner at the sushi restaurant next door...no. They want to keep feeling each other up. I think it's hilarious, because they are all competing for the SAME damn business (they're all real estate and lenders)! Oh well...she has some more merlot, we eat our delicious sushi, I hold her up as we stumble along the docks looking at the yachts in the marina, and I drive her home in her Lexus SUV (which I've always wanted to test-drive! Unsuccessful evening, dammit!!! Oh well, at least she has a lunch date today. I hope they fall in love, get married, and have many Italian babies, because apparently I SUCK at this wingman stuff. ~Jaye Do not believe that possibly you can escape the reward of your action. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Squeak 17 #2 August 17, 2007 it was a GAY bar ,you just missed the sign on the door You are not now, nor will you ever be, good enough to not die in this sport (Sparky) My Life ROCKS! How's yours doing? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
ryoder 1,590 #3 August 17, 2007 Quote She's freaking beautiful. And she's now loaded. And you didn't call me."There are only three things of value: younger women, faster airplanes, and bigger crocodiles" - Arthur Jones. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
ACMESkydiver 0 #4 August 17, 2007 Quote it was a GAY bar ,you just missed the sign on the door Dude I was seriously starting to wonder...~Jaye Do not believe that possibly you can escape the reward of your action. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
ACMESkydiver 0 #5 August 17, 2007 Quote Quote She's freaking beautiful. And she's now loaded. And you didn't call me. ~Jaye Do not believe that possibly you can escape the reward of your action. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
virgin-burner 1 #6 August 17, 2007 set up a date, i'll take her.. just for the records, i'm account manager for eastern-switzerland and liechtenstein. i've only bragged about it in the beginning.. “Some may never live, but the crazy never die.” -Hunter S. Thompson "No. Try not. Do... or do not. There is no try." -Yoda Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Remster 30 #7 August 17, 2007 Quote i'm account manager for eastern-switzerland and liechtenstein For what? Swisher bathroom products? Remster Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
virgin-burner 1 #8 August 17, 2007 Quote Quote i'm account manager for eastern-switzerland and liechtenstein For what? Swisher bathroom products? not quite, i'm selling investment goods. thats all. “Some may never live, but the crazy never die.” -Hunter S. Thompson "No. Try not. Do... or do not. There is no try." -Yoda Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
cocheese 0 #9 August 17, 2007 Silly Jaye, they were all fighting over you. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
ACMESkydiver 0 #10 August 17, 2007 Quote Silly Jaye, they were all fighting over you. One guy did offer to buy me a drink. He was just being polite because he was reaching over me to order his. I told him that I'd tell the bartender that my next water was on him. ~Jaye Do not believe that possibly you can escape the reward of your action. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
popsjumper 2 #11 August 17, 2007 Must have been an upscale bar. Some bars have guys whippin' it out and comparing dick sizes. Oh wait...same things, they're just just too uppity to hang it out there.My reality and yours are quite different. I think we're all Bozos on this bus. Falcon5232, SCS8170, SCSA353, POPS9398, DS239 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Thanatos340 1 #12 August 17, 2007 QuoteSome bars have guys whippin' it out and comparing dick sizes. Andy.. That is called a Dropzone, not a bar. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
ACMESkydiver 0 #13 August 17, 2007 Quote Quote Some bars have guys whippin' it out and comparing dick sizes. Andy.. That is called a Dropzone, not a bar. "I was at a bar and suddenly parachutes started landing all around me!" ~Jaye Do not believe that possibly you can escape the reward of your action. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
popsjumper 2 #14 August 17, 2007 Quote Quote Some bars have guys whippin' it out and comparing dick sizes. Andy.. That is called a Dropzone, not a bar. Point taken. We already know you have the biggest deck at the DZ. My reality and yours are quite different. I think we're all Bozos on this bus. Falcon5232, SCS8170, SCSA353, POPS9398, DS239 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
simplyputsi 0 #15 August 17, 2007 Should I pm you my number. I'm pretty sure you are just trying to torture me these days. I can tell you that you have positively done your duty. I give up. I surrender. Skymama's #2 stalker - Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
turtlespeed 221 #16 August 17, 2007 I had a wingperson at LP this year - Yeah - she cock blocked me.Seriously.It was funny the next day - but - DAMN! Look wingpeople are not ever meant to be moral compasses - they are there to help get you laid! I'm not usually into the whole 3-way thing, but you got me a little excited with that. - Skymama BTR #1 / OTB^5 Official #2 / Hellfish #408 / VSCR #108/Tortuga/Orfun Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
squirrel 0 #17 August 17, 2007 wonder if any of them work for Countrywide? If they do, please take them outside and shoot them...for helping create the sub prime meltdown, and scaring buyers away from the market. btw, anyone wanna buy a house, 3 weeks from completion, just over an hour from 3 great so-cal DZs? ________________________________ Where is Darwin when you need him? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
McBeth 0 #18 August 17, 2007 Quote I had a wingperson at LP this year - Yeah - she cock blocked me.Seriously.It was funny the next day - but - DAMN! Look wingpeople are not ever meant to be moral compasses - they are there to help get you laid! Wasn't me... though I did try to help get the cougar off you. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
ACMESkydiver 0 #19 August 17, 2007 Quote Should I pm you my number. I'm pretty sure you are just trying to torture me these days. I can tell you that you have positively done your duty. I give up. I surrender. Are you Italian, Greek, or Egyptian? She like her men 'exotic, hot & rich'. ~Jaye Do not believe that possibly you can escape the reward of your action. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
turtlespeed 221 #20 August 17, 2007 Quote Quote I had a wingperson at LP this year - Yeah - she cock blocked me.Seriously.It was funny the next day - but - DAMN! Look wingpeople are not ever meant to be moral compasses - they are there to help get you laid! Wasn't me... though I did try to help get the cougar off you. Yes - cougar had teeth! But that said - all we really needed was some time, a lot of meth, some viagra and we could have knocked the bitch off the blocks.I'm not usually into the whole 3-way thing, but you got me a little excited with that. - Skymama BTR #1 / OTB^5 Official #2 / Hellfish #408 / VSCR #108/Tortuga/Orfun Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
virgin-burner 1 #21 August 17, 2007 Quote Quote Should I pm you my number. I'm pretty sure you are just trying to torture me these days. I can tell you that you have positively done your duty. I give up. I surrender. Are you Italian, Greek, or Egyptian? She like her men 'exotic, hot & rich'. swiss aint exotic enough, uh!? we're being called the brazilians of europe, you know..!?“Some may never live, but the crazy never die.” -Hunter S. Thompson "No. Try not. Do... or do not. There is no try." -Yoda Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
