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Thanatos340

11 Things Women dont Know.

By Thanatos340, in The Bonfire

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Thanatos340    1

Thanatos340
Plus one they Do know but dont want to admit.

This from an article linked on the front page of Yahoo. Most are fairly accurate I would say except for #4. I think most women look better without the war paint.
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1. Getting angry at us for not reading your mind is like getting angry at yourself for not being able to fly. It's not just futile, it's physically impossible.
2. Yes, we do think Jessica Alba is hot. Sometimes we're even dumb enough to admit it.
3. Don't ask us to understand your shoe fetish. Asking us to respect it is even sort of pushing it.
4. You do look good without makeup, just not as good as you look with it.
5. Ever notice how we don't fight with our male friends? That's why we get so frustrated when we fight with you.
6. You care what you're wearing infinitely more than we do. In fact, if you're naked when you open the front door, you won't hear an argument from us.
7. You don't like to get hit on in public, you don't want to date online and you don't want to be set up on blind dates. Tell us if sending messenger pigeons is an appropriate way of courting. Because if it is, we're all over it.
8. There should a statute of limitations on stupid things that we said that can come back to haunt us. I propose 24 hours.
9. Cooking dinner for a man is like buying flowers for a woman, except it takes a lot more time, effort and thought for you to do it. Thanks. We appreciate it.
10. We actually like your girly pet-names for us, but please, not in front of the guys!
11. Just because we like looking at the women in Maxim doesn't mean we want to actually converse with the women in Maxim. Not for long, anyway.
12. Your nice guy friends are the most reliable source for telling you if your new boyfriend's a jerk. And he probably is. (By the way, you might want to consider marrying that nice guy who's giving you advice about the jerk.)



:P:D:D:D

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flyinchicken    0

flyinchicken
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1. Getting angry at us for not reading your mind is like getting angry at yourself for not being able to fly. It's not just futile, it's physically impossible.
2. Yes, we do think Jessica Alba is hot. Sometimes we're even dumb enough to admit it.
3. Don't ask us to understand your shoe fetish. Asking us to respect it is even sort of pushing it.
4. You do look good without makeup, just not as good as you look with it.
5. Ever notice how we don't fight with our male friends? That's why we get so frustrated when we fight with you.
6. You care what you're wearing infinitely more than we do. In fact, if you're naked when you open the front door, you won't hear an argument from us.
7. You don't like to get hit on in public, you don't want to date online and you don't want to be set up on blind dates. Tell us if sending messenger pigeons is an appropriate way of courting. Because if it is, we're all over it.
8. There should a statute of limitations on stupid things that we said that can come back to haunt us. I propose 24 hours.
9. Cooking dinner for a man is like buying flowers for a woman, except it takes a lot more time, effort and thought for you to do it. Thanks. We appreciate it.
10. We actually like your girly pet-names for us, but please, not in front of the guys!
11. Just because we like looking at the women in Maxim doesn't mean we want to actually converse with the women in Maxim. Not for long, anyway.
12. Your nice guy friends are the most reliable source for telling you if your new boyfriend's a jerk. And he probably is. (By the way, you might want to consider marrying that nice guy who's giving you advice about the jerk.)



What a woman KNOWS.......

1 When you pay attention to our conversations, mind reading isn't necessary.
2 It's always good to know your guy is only with you because Jessica Alba won't have him.
3 We put up with your sports or car fetish and EVEN respect it.
4 Wow a compliment!
5 Oh really? So barroom brawls are just men fighting with strangers? Of course, that isn't frustrating at all.
6 So is it ok if we are naked when we meet your parents?
7 We love it when a man intelligently shows interest. A "hey babe" or annoying whistle isn't going to turn our heads. Try interesting conversation. It gets guys laid.
8 Not our fault if you can't stand behind your word.
9 Then stop buying flowers and put in a little more effort.
10 you can have this one. We have always understood the fragile male ego.
11 Good! Then we can look at hot guys without accusation?
12 Bad boys are HOT. We all pound our heads off the pavement wishing we could be attracted to the nice guy. :|

"Diligent observation leads to pure abstraction". Lari Pittman

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moodyskydiver    0

moodyskydiver
Quote

What a woman KNOWS.......

1 When you pay attention to our conversations, mind reading isn't necessary.
2 It's always good to know your guy is only with you because Jessica Alba won't have him.
3 We put up with your sports or car fetish and EVEN respect it.
4 Wow a compliment!
5 Oh really? So barroom brawls are just men fighting with strangers? Of course, that isn't frustrating at all.
6 So is it ok if we are naked when we meet your parents?
7 We love it when a man intelligently shows interest. A "hey babe" or annoying whistle isn't going to turn our heads. Try interesting conversation. It gets guys laid.
8 Not our fault if you can't stand behind your word.
9 Then stop buying flowers and put in a little more effort.
10 you can have this one. We have always understood the fragile male ego.
11 Good! Then we can look at hot guys without accusation?
12 Bad boys are HOT. We all pound our heads off the pavement wishing we could be attracted to the nice guy.



And yes,we know the nice best guy friend is right about the jerks..and hes probably hot and you would do him if you werent such close friends.:P


"...just an earthbound misfit, I."

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JustChuteMeNow    0

JustChuteMeNow
14. If we stop and ask for directions it just prolongs the time we are lost.

15. We will never forget a) your birthday, b) Valentine’s Day, or c) our wedding or first kiss or first date or first ‘I Love You’ anniversary if you would just remind us that it is coming up.

16. We do hear you the first time. The lag is because we’re analyzing our responses, just in case it’s a trick question.

17. We do care about doing it wrong but if you want us to keep doing it wrong then keep faking orgasms.
Think of how stupid the average person is and realize that statistically half of them are stupider than that.



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lawrocket    3

lawrocket
1 When you pay attention to our conversations, mind reading isn't necessary.
- if we were allowed to get a word in then it would be a conversation. Conversation does not mean listening to your poetry. If you could read OUR minds you'd hear us saying, "Wow. She's been dumped LOTS of times. By lots of guys."

2 It's always good to know your guy is only with you because Jessica Alba won't have him.
- And that you're with him because Tom Brady isn't with you

3 We put up with your sports or car fetish and EVEN respect it.
- The sport's car was how we landed you, anyway. Dudes don't like hot cars. Chicks like hot cars. Dudes get hot cars because they like chicks.

4 Wow a compliment!
- WOW! A female actually heard a compliment instead of an insult.

5 Oh really? So barroom brawls are just men fighting with strangers? Of course, that isn't frustrating at all.
- We don't throw haymakers at friends. We fight our enemies. Friends? We say, "Man. That was fucked up. Here, dude, have a beer. Dude. Jessica Alba is HOT!" Problem solved.

6 So is it ok if we are naked when we meet your parents?
- Fine with me. It'd be cool with my old man, too. He'd thank me. It's my MOTHER who would object.

7 We love it when a man intelligently shows interest. A "hey babe" or annoying whistle isn't going to turn our heads. Try interesting conversation. It gets guys laid.
- We aren't interested in what was said today on Oprah or the latest news from the red carpet. When was the last time you saw a dude and said, "Wow! I bet he could explain the possible practical applications of a confirmation of the Maldacena duality." I call bullshit.

8 Not our fault if you can't stand behind your word.
- When you pay attention to our conversations, you'll know what we meant. "I said you look good without makeup! It was a compliment!"

9 Then stop buying flowers and put in a little more effort.
- This works fine until you say, "You never buy me flowers."

10 you can have this one. We have always understood the fragile male ego.
- best exemplified by the full length mirrors that are the hallmark of masculinity. Not.

11 Good! Then we can look at hot guys without accusation?
- Sure. Just cuz you've ordered doesn't mean that you can't look at the menu.

12 Bad boys are HOT. We all pound our heads off the pavement wishing we could be attracted to the nice guy.
- Back to No. 1. Most of the time we can read her mind: "She's been dumped LOTS of times."


My wife is hotter than your wife.

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pinkfairy    0

pinkfairy
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12 Bad boys are HOT. We all pound our heads off the pavement wishing we could be attracted to the nice guy. :|



Bad boys aren't that hot. I think it's more a "I can't get him, so I want him"-thing.
Relax, you can die if you mess up, but it will probably not be by bullet.

I'm a BIG, TOUGH BIGWAY FORMATION SKYDIVER! What are you?

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