Squeak 17 #51 May 18, 2007 QuoteWHAT DO I DO???? SHE IS NOT MY FAMILY, HE IS NOT MY SON I HAVE TOLD THEM EVERYTHING YOU HAVE TOLD MEWhat you do is STEP AWAY, beleive me, I know how hard it is to do that but that's all you can doYou are not now, nor will you ever be, good enough to not die in this sport (Sparky) My Life ROCKS! How's yours doing? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
methsucks 0 #52 May 18, 2007 HOW DO I DO AN INTERVENTION WITH JUST ME? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
bozo 0 #53 May 18, 2007 QuoteHOW DO I DO AN INTERVENTION WITH JUST ME? You dont. You have to get her parents on board and they can do it legally. We had my sister committed on several occasions. She cleaned up got a good job...got moneyed up and bought meth. There are no guarantees...meth is of the devil. bozo Pain is fleeting. Glory lasts forever. Chicks dig scars. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
LisaH 0 #54 May 18, 2007 QuoteHOW DO I DO AN INTERVENTION WITH JUST ME? Where is the child's biological father? Can't he step in?Be yourself! MooOOooOoo Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
unformed 0 #55 May 18, 2007 QuoteQuoteWHAT DO I DO???? SHE IS NOT MY FAMILY, HE IS NOT MY SON I HAVE TOLD THEM EVERYTHING YOU HAVE TOLD ME Depends on how much you care about her. Care a bunch....do an intervention NOW. Care very little...walk away. Clean your suit for the funeral. An intervention means nothing when the person doesn't want to quit. You can't force someone to quit. You can't even force them to see the folly of their ways. If you really care about someone, all you can do is step away and if she ever decides she really wants to quit, be the friend she so desperately needs. This isn't theory. I've been there. Drugged minds don't listen to logic or reason. They listen to the drug. Once they decide they don't want the drug anymore, they'll listen to logic and reason. If she's saying she wants to wean herself, she's still listening to the drug and there's nothing you can do.This ad space for sale. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
methsucks 0 #56 May 18, 2007 The father sat there and wathced her waste away using meth and did nothing, even when I asked him "Man to man, tell me the truth". He lets his son be around it knowing the situation. He is a total enbabler Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
LisaH 0 #57 May 18, 2007 Quote The father sat there and wathced her waste away using meth and did nothing, even when I asked him "Man to man, tell me the truth". He lets his son be around it knowing the situation. He is a total enbabler Not good. Looks like this child will become a ward of the state if the grandparents are proven unfit as well. Very sad. My prayers to all of you!!Be yourself! MooOOooOoo Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
unformed 0 #58 May 18, 2007 QuoteThe father sat there and wathced her waste away using meth and did nothing, even when I asked him "Man to man, tell me the truth". He lets his son be around it knowing the situation. He is a total enbabler First of all, there's not much you can say given that you were the one who introduced her to the drug, especially taking into account that you've been in the scene for ten years. Within two year of starting coke, I knew better than to introduce ANY drug to ANYBODY. Within three or four, I made it a point to tell EVERYBODY who was interested to never touch it, and if they were going to, to do it before they had any sort of family. Given that you recognized the dangers, knew she had a child and knew she had a sister who was an addict, you really should have known better. At least you are manning up to it. That's taking responsibility. You said you were planning on going into rehab. Ask yourself, why? Is it to show her that she should go into it? Or is it to clean yourself up? I don't think it's the latter because you said the use has never adversely affected your life, and that's okay, but the problem is, if you're going into rehab just to show her, it's not going to work because you don't believe in it. The best thing you can do is extract yourself from the situation and they need to work things out on their own. This is an internal family crisis, and from the sounds of it, you're not really part of it, so extract yourself. Now, if you really do want to clean yourself up, props to you, but extract yourself as well, since it doesn't do them any good. As for the family, it's difficult for one to believe that a loved one is a drug addict, especially when they were so different not too long ago. It will take time for them to come to terms with it, but that's just how it is. Things always take time and a lot of pain to fix.This ad space for sale. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
airtwardo 7 #59 May 18, 2007 Care a bunch....do an intervention NOW. Care very little...walk away. Clean your suit for the funeral. Quote And either way, get YOUR life on track. That's YOUR priority, what you owe yourself. I know you're hurting and in a tough situation...I do feel for you. If it were me, I would walk away with the parting words to her parents that they need to get her in treatment immediately and away from her child. I would offer to them if the kid isn't protected from her, you may seek legal authorities to intervene in the interest of the youngster's safety. You can't get dragged into this further without damaging YOURSELF...walk away. I hope you get on track, you sound like a good caring person...made some mistakes but manned up, you get YOU strong & clean....and like I said yesterday, I for one am pulling for ya! ~ If you choke a Smurf, what color does it turn? ~ Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites virgin-burner 1 #60 May 18, 2007 there has been some good advice on this thread.. but also some bad ones, coming from people who dont really know that much about this kind of stuff.. i believe they way into addiction, and out of it, cant really be described with general statements. its different for everyone.. but one thing is for sure: the way out only works with your own will. loosing child, job, family and friends is not enough for some to stop.. and there's no reasoning with hardcore addicts! everyone has to deal it with themselves..“Some may never live, but the crazy never die.” -Hunter S. Thompson "No. Try not. Do... or do not. There is no try." -Yoda Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites airborneak 0 #61 May 18, 2007 If you want some support, shoot me a message. I have been in recovery for the past 7 years. I am always willing to talk. Something to know... The secret to staying clean is simple...if you don't pick up, you can't get loaded...anything else you do s up to you. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites BelskyBlueEyes 0 #62 May 18, 2007 I do not think it is far to blame methsucks for introducing her to meth. She had her own mind, she could have just said no. If the rest of the world can can say no, so can she. He has enough trouble with the guilt, don't make it worse. She is not taking the responsibility for her decisions in trying to blame you for what has happened. Typical of a drug abuser, blame the world, but do not look at themselves! It's easy to make others feel bad, takes all that feeling of their back. Do not fall for it, do not feel guilty. Again, all she had to do was say no. At least he realizes he needs to do something about his own life. He can not help her if she does not want help. The only way she will ever get better is if she realizes herself that she has a problem. I have experience with a friend that is a different person now, and this person just does not get it. Meth addicts are not capable of seeing their problem. Please dont let her problem tear your life apart. She did this to HERSELF. What she put in her body was HER decision. Prayers and hugs to you, it is a long hard road full of tears for you, I pray you survive it just as much as she does. The both of you are capable of getting beyond this, you do have the power within. I know you do! I'm not saying it is easy, but you CAN do it. You have to want it bad enough. Feel free to PM me if you like. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites Lindsey 0 #63 May 18, 2007 I do not think it is far to blame methsucks for introducing her to meth. Yes it is. Not his fault for her continuing to use, but it is his fault for introducing her to it. I would expect, though everyone's different, that it will be an important event for his recovery to recognize the effects of his behavior on other people. This one is big. She is not taking the responsibility for her decisions in trying to blame you for what has happened. and THAT will be important for her to overcome if she is going to recover herself. This is, however, THEIR problem, their recovery, and not mine, so I'll stop my commentary here.-- A conservative is just a liberal who's been mugged. A liberal is just a conservative who's been to jail Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites BelskyBlueEyes 0 #64 May 18, 2007 He said he has never used meth, and in fact knew of it's dangers and told her not to ever do it. She has a sister that is an addict, do you think maybe the sister was the person she got it from? (hmm, maybe!) He did not introduce her to it, she found it herself. So how can he be to blame? She is the one that wanted to try it, she sought it out, and she got herself addicted. I dont understand how this can be his fault at all? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites FacePlant 0 #65 May 18, 2007 get her arrested man. find out where she's buying and call in a tip. and call child services to get that kid taken care of at least until she's out of the house. then he can go back to his grandparents. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites Lindsey 0 #66 May 18, 2007 Okay....he introduced her to ecstasy and coke. She moved on to meth on her own. People who introduce others to drugs have some responsibility for the outcome. In my mind, supporting a person's recovery is not patting them on the hand and telling them "everything will be okay....it's really not your fault what happened to your friend (and her child) whom you introduced to hard drugs." Maybe she would have gone there anyway, but as it is, it's he who facilitated her entry into the lifestyle of drug use. I hope he continues to recognize his part in this....more for his sake than for hers. linz-- A conservative is just a liberal who's been mugged. A liberal is just a conservative who's been to jail Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites airtwardo 7 #67 May 18, 2007 QuoteI hope he continues to recognize his part in this....more for his sake than for hers. From the tone and manner of his beginning post, I think he realizes it. To admit that to her parents was a hard thing to do, and shows acceptance of responsibility and maybe even remorse. That's a positive sign regarding 'his' stepping away from all this and getting a new life start. I know a lot of people that deflect 'all' responsibility for their actions. ~ If you choke a Smurf, what color does it turn? ~ Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites methsucks 0 #68 May 25, 2007 Well, I went to an evaluation for inpatient treatment for alcholism. I have to say Im not all that impressed. The 'councelor' seemed to eager to label me an 'addict' with very little info. She claimed that I will be doing meth soon too if I didnt get treatment. She also seemed to have no idea about effects and addiction qualities of different drugs. She lumped them all together. I asked her if they treated depression and they dont. It is a 6 week program and I might try it just for the hell of it. As for my ex, she is not ready to stop. And, those here that blame me, im ok with that and those opinions dont affect me. She knew better. She is in the medical field and has seen meth addicts die. Her sister is a meth addict. I almost think this was a cry for help or the same as sticking a gun in her mouth. She knows its suicide. I am coming to grips with my feelings and guilt. THANK ALL OF YOU FOR YOUR SUPPORT! You all have been a lifesaver. (its amazing how many of my friends knew this was me) Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites Squeak 17 #69 May 25, 2007 Quote (its amazing how many of my friends knew this was me) Actually not it's not that amazing. Selfdenial is a powerfull thing, they probably knew way before you postedYou are not now, nor will you ever be, good enough to not die in this sport (Sparky) My Life ROCKS! How's yours doing? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites Prev 1 2 3 Next Page 3 of 3 Join the conversation You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account. Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible. Reply to this topic... × Pasted as rich text. 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virgin-burner 1 #60 May 18, 2007 there has been some good advice on this thread.. but also some bad ones, coming from people who dont really know that much about this kind of stuff.. i believe they way into addiction, and out of it, cant really be described with general statements. its different for everyone.. but one thing is for sure: the way out only works with your own will. loosing child, job, family and friends is not enough for some to stop.. and there's no reasoning with hardcore addicts! everyone has to deal it with themselves..“Some may never live, but the crazy never die.” -Hunter S. Thompson "No. Try not. Do... or do not. There is no try." -Yoda Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
airborneak 0 #61 May 18, 2007 If you want some support, shoot me a message. I have been in recovery for the past 7 years. I am always willing to talk. Something to know... The secret to staying clean is simple...if you don't pick up, you can't get loaded...anything else you do s up to you. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
BelskyBlueEyes 0 #62 May 18, 2007 I do not think it is far to blame methsucks for introducing her to meth. She had her own mind, she could have just said no. If the rest of the world can can say no, so can she. He has enough trouble with the guilt, don't make it worse. She is not taking the responsibility for her decisions in trying to blame you for what has happened. Typical of a drug abuser, blame the world, but do not look at themselves! It's easy to make others feel bad, takes all that feeling of their back. Do not fall for it, do not feel guilty. Again, all she had to do was say no. At least he realizes he needs to do something about his own life. He can not help her if she does not want help. The only way she will ever get better is if she realizes herself that she has a problem. I have experience with a friend that is a different person now, and this person just does not get it. Meth addicts are not capable of seeing their problem. Please dont let her problem tear your life apart. She did this to HERSELF. What she put in her body was HER decision. Prayers and hugs to you, it is a long hard road full of tears for you, I pray you survive it just as much as she does. The both of you are capable of getting beyond this, you do have the power within. I know you do! I'm not saying it is easy, but you CAN do it. You have to want it bad enough. Feel free to PM me if you like. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Lindsey 0 #63 May 18, 2007 I do not think it is far to blame methsucks for introducing her to meth. Yes it is. Not his fault for her continuing to use, but it is his fault for introducing her to it. I would expect, though everyone's different, that it will be an important event for his recovery to recognize the effects of his behavior on other people. This one is big. She is not taking the responsibility for her decisions in trying to blame you for what has happened. and THAT will be important for her to overcome if she is going to recover herself. This is, however, THEIR problem, their recovery, and not mine, so I'll stop my commentary here.-- A conservative is just a liberal who's been mugged. A liberal is just a conservative who's been to jail Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
BelskyBlueEyes 0 #64 May 18, 2007 He said he has never used meth, and in fact knew of it's dangers and told her not to ever do it. She has a sister that is an addict, do you think maybe the sister was the person she got it from? (hmm, maybe!) He did not introduce her to it, she found it herself. So how can he be to blame? She is the one that wanted to try it, she sought it out, and she got herself addicted. I dont understand how this can be his fault at all? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
FacePlant 0 #65 May 18, 2007 get her arrested man. find out where she's buying and call in a tip. and call child services to get that kid taken care of at least until she's out of the house. then he can go back to his grandparents. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Lindsey 0 #66 May 18, 2007 Okay....he introduced her to ecstasy and coke. She moved on to meth on her own. People who introduce others to drugs have some responsibility for the outcome. In my mind, supporting a person's recovery is not patting them on the hand and telling them "everything will be okay....it's really not your fault what happened to your friend (and her child) whom you introduced to hard drugs." Maybe she would have gone there anyway, but as it is, it's he who facilitated her entry into the lifestyle of drug use. I hope he continues to recognize his part in this....more for his sake than for hers. linz-- A conservative is just a liberal who's been mugged. A liberal is just a conservative who's been to jail Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
airtwardo 7 #67 May 18, 2007 QuoteI hope he continues to recognize his part in this....more for his sake than for hers. From the tone and manner of his beginning post, I think he realizes it. To admit that to her parents was a hard thing to do, and shows acceptance of responsibility and maybe even remorse. That's a positive sign regarding 'his' stepping away from all this and getting a new life start. I know a lot of people that deflect 'all' responsibility for their actions. ~ If you choke a Smurf, what color does it turn? ~ Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
methsucks 0 #68 May 25, 2007 Well, I went to an evaluation for inpatient treatment for alcholism. I have to say Im not all that impressed. The 'councelor' seemed to eager to label me an 'addict' with very little info. She claimed that I will be doing meth soon too if I didnt get treatment. She also seemed to have no idea about effects and addiction qualities of different drugs. She lumped them all together. I asked her if they treated depression and they dont. It is a 6 week program and I might try it just for the hell of it. As for my ex, she is not ready to stop. And, those here that blame me, im ok with that and those opinions dont affect me. She knew better. She is in the medical field and has seen meth addicts die. Her sister is a meth addict. I almost think this was a cry for help or the same as sticking a gun in her mouth. She knows its suicide. I am coming to grips with my feelings and guilt. THANK ALL OF YOU FOR YOUR SUPPORT! You all have been a lifesaver. (its amazing how many of my friends knew this was me) Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Squeak 17 #69 May 25, 2007 Quote (its amazing how many of my friends knew this was me) Actually not it's not that amazing. Selfdenial is a powerfull thing, they probably knew way before you postedYou are not now, nor will you ever be, good enough to not die in this sport (Sparky) My Life ROCKS! How's yours doing? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
