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Sutton 0
QuoteI disagree wholeheartedly. Some situations must not be addressed in a calm, lovey-dovey manner. Some situations, if serious enough, should be handled with abrupt, hammer-it-through-the-thick-head, style.
I totally agree with Max, but maybe that's because we are routinely put in situations where you simply cannot let stupid mistakes slide or people end up dead. I have been accused a bunch of time of being a total asshole and I really don't care. If something truly demands attention, I will gladly step up and be the bad guy. Most of the time you end up getting thanked by the person for setting them straight.
Chuck
That may even involve percussion tuning, if it was serious enough.
Muzzle sweep the back of your team mates head and see you don't get a love tap upside your head.
If they really piss you off, Shove the carrot up their ass and Beat them with the stick. Works everytime.
2fat2fly 0
QuoteI have been accused a bunch of time of being a total asshole and I really don't care.
I don't know you from Adam's housecat, but reading the advice that you give-I expect that you "being the bad guy" is firm correction, not verbal abuse. You probably don't spend 30 minutes yelling at someone and calling them stupid before you get in to the thing that they did and why it was wrong. I would picture you as more of a "That was dumb, this is why". I might be wrong.
ChrisL 2
QuoteI disagree wholeheartedly.
Some situations must not be addressed in a calm, lovey-dovey manner.
Some situations, if serious enough, should be handled with abrupt, hammer-it-through-the-thick-head, style.
Everyone makes mistakes sometimes. Even skygods.
If I screwed up and someone approached me in this aggressive, loud, confrontational, and humiliating fashion, I would hurt them.
Give respect, get respect in return. It's as simple as that.
An old lady screwed up a few weeks ago and rear ended me on the road.
Should I have gotten all up in her face because she did something unsafe that could have resulted in me being injured?
Grow up.
My mighty steed
Richards 0
QuoteQuoteYelling and screaming is most often counter-productive.
While you are yelling, the listener is thinking about what an asshole you are and not listening to the content of your presentation.
Educate with style, not brute force.
Said perfectly. I second that.My biggest handicap is that sometimes the hole in the front of my head operates a tad bit faster than the grey matter contained within.
piisfish 140
some people are willing to be educated/to learn, even if it is from their own mistakes. Some other people will never admit they can do anything wrong.QuoteMost of the time you end up getting thanked by the person for setting them straight
They deserve different treatments.
QuoteQuoteI disagree wholeheartedly. Some situations must not be addressed in a calm, lovey-dovey manner. Some situations, if serious enough, should be handled with abrupt, hammer-it-through-the-thick-head, style.
I totally agree with Max, but maybe that's because we are routinely put in situations where you simply cannot let stupid mistakes slide or people end up dead. I have been accused a bunch of time of being a total asshole and I really don't care. If something truly demands attention, I will gladly step up and be the bad guy. Most of the time you end up getting thanked by the person for setting them straight.
What he said. If it's a novice, and they honestly didn't know any better, I'll approach them privately and we'll have a reasonable talk about it. If it's someone with some experience who made a rare mistake, they'll probably get the same treatment. But if it's someone who's a frequent offender that's gotten the kit gloves before, or showing blatant disregard for others' safety, or intentionally being stupid to please a crowd, a bit of humiliation can be an effective taskmaster. Light, public joking about serious breaches of safety can make them seem light and funny, encouraging an environment in which such acts are seen as positive attention-getters. That cycle has to be nipped right in the bud.
Edit to add: On the other hand, see attached.
Blues,
Dave
(drink Mountain Dew)
He went on for over a minute about how stupid I was in doing what I did. He would have gone on longer had I not acknowledged it and apologized.
It was a real wake-up call, and gave me a different perspective on things. Not only can I f.ck myself up, but I can f.ck someone else up if I am not careful enough. I wouldn't be able to live with that. It taught me a lesson and I've been much more careful since.
I never saw him again, but if I do I will remind him of the incident and thank him for being an a-hole about it.
Sometimes a harsh scolding can be very effective and is quite called for.
Be humble, ask questions, listen, learn, follow the golden rule, talk when necessary, and know when to shut the fuck up.
Brian425 0
Pulling someone to the side and talking/educating them will get far more results. When you are doing something, you do not see it from an observer's perspective. Education is the way to go.
If that fails, buy their name in Bounce Bingo. Somehow that always get their attention.
The only time you should look down on someone is when you are offering them your hand.
DAVE619 0
QuoteOn my 20-x jump I went into final a bit high and sashayed over the landing area to lose altitude and land in the landing area. Once I picked up my canopy some guy came rushing over to me and called me a f.cking moron and told me to look around before doing something that stupid -- he was going into final behind me as I was doing my s-turns.
He went on for over a minute about how stupid I was in doing what I did. He would have gone on longer had I not acknowledged it and apologized.
It was a real wake-up call, and gave me a different perspective on things. Not only can I f.ck myself up, but I can f.ck someone else up if I am not careful enough. I wouldn't be able to live with that. It taught me a lesson and I've been much more careful since.
I never saw him again, but if I do I will remind him of the incident and thank him for being an a-hole about it.
Sometimes a harsh scolding can be very effective and is quite called for.
Dont you think that if he took you aside and explained the situation to you and how serious it was that the lesson would have been just as effective? There was no reason for him to talk to you in the way that he did. You were a student and did not know any better. I can tell you that if I ever witness anyone do that to a student I will definately have words with that person. They need to know that this is wrong and people are not to be treated with disrespect. I dont care if they have a bazillion jumps, that does not give them the right to treat somebody in such a manor!
Sometimes people screw up without hurting themselves or anyone else and they take it as a wakeup call. I'm not going to be disrespectful to them.
Sometimes people screw up because they didn't know better. Again, as long as they're receptive to constructive criticism, I see no problem.
If someone is consistently screwing up in a way that *only* puts themselves at risk and won't listen to constructive criticism, I don't see any problem with that either. Those problems tend to take care of themselves. The one exception I can think of is if someone I care about is doing something that will get them hurt. I'm not going to let them off easy and I hope they would jump on my case if I were doing something stupid that could get me hurt.
It's the very rare person who puts others at risk and doesn't care that gets under my skin. Even then, I don't know that there is anything gained by reaming them out. They just need to be grounded.
Walt
ryno1972 0
I know a few people that will correct someone or point out a mistake in front of the whole world and make a point to let EVERYONE know that they are giving advice or saw something out of whack. I think people like that think they are going to look better.
While you are yelling, the listener is thinking about what an asshole you are and not listening to the content of your presentation.
Educate with style, not brute force.
Exception previously noted with respect to the skygod...which should also be followed up by a banning from the DZ.
Why are DZOs so reluctant to kick off the idiot that repeatedly screws with your skydiving health?
I think we're all Bozos on this bus.
Falcon5232, SCS8170, SCSA353, POPS9398, DS239
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