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MrBounce

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Ok, its an old one, but its a slow day at work and I'm bored, so....

The British are feeling the pinch in relation to recent bombings and have raised their security level from "Miffed" to "Peeved." Soon though, security levels may be raised yet again to "Irritated" or even "A Bit Cross." Londoners have not been "A Bit Cross" since the blitz in 1940 when tea supplies all but ran out. Terrorists have been re-categorized from "Tiresome" to a "Bloody Nuisance". The last time the British issued a "Bloody Nuisance" warning level was during the great fire of 1666.

Also, the French government announced yesterday that it has raised its terror alert level from "Run" to "Hide". The only two higher levels in France are "Surrender" and "Collaborate." The rise was precipitated by a recent fire that destroyed France's white flag factory, effectively paralysing the country's military capability.

It's not only the English and French that are on a heightened level of alert. Italy has increased the alert level from "shout loudly and excitedly" to "elaborate military posturing". Two more levels remain, "ineffective combat operations" and "change sides".

The Germans also increased their alert state from "disdainful arrogance" to "dress in uniform and sing marching songs". They also only have two higher levels: "invade a neighbour" and "lose".

:D

Gavin

Ashes to ashes, dust to dust. If you don't take it out and use it, its going to rust.

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and....

World's shortest fairytale.....

Once upon a time a man asked a woman "will you marry me?"

The woman replied "No" and the man went skydiving, fishing, motorcycling, drinking and shagging and even though he had no money left in his pocket at the end of the week, he lived happily ever after.

Gavin

Ashes to ashes, dust to dust. If you don't take it out and use it, its going to rust.

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