Ashtanga 0 #26 March 24, 2006 She is planning on a weekend with lots of peanut butter, your dog and a midget named Shorty the Pimp and she doesn't want to feel guilty. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
5432154321 0 #27 March 24, 2006 QuoteOk, all good info so far ....I will add the questions - What would each of you do in this situation? and have you been there yourself? Well if it were me and I loved this girl and didn't just want to throw away a good thing, I'd skip the reunion and do somthing special with her instead. If she still hints around about being to busy with her masters later I'd take that as she's trying to break it off, but leaving it up to you to end it, which would suck, but very few people have the balls to speak the truth. So supprise her by booking something with her instead and see where it goes from there. --- xenaswampjumper SPANKS THIS ASS!!! I WISH karenmeal spanked this ass too..... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
waltappel 1 #28 March 24, 2006 QuoteOk, all good info so far ....I will add the questions - What would each of you do in this situation? and have you been there yourself? I would ask her what is really going on and go from there. I have never had a GF give me "permission" to cheat and like many others have said, you should see warning flags all over the place. Walt Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
skymama 37 #29 March 24, 2006 QuoteWhat would each of you do in this situation? and have you been there yourself? No, I haven't been there but I think you should talk to her and get her to say what she is really saying before you break up with her. Like someone else said, it could be her own insecurities making her say such a thing. It's very strange though.She is Da Man, and you better not mess with Da Man, because she will lay some keepdown on you faster than, well, really fast. ~Billvon Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
wmw999 2,515 #30 March 24, 2006 Talk to her. Now. Ask her if it bothers her that you're going to the HS reunion. If it does, yes, it's an insecurity -- if she's way stressed from working on her masters, her tolerance for stuff like that's going to be way down. It's a huge red flag. But if you care about her and the relationship, this is where you invest some work into it, and talk to her. Plan what you want to ask, what you want to say, and what you expect to hear, so that you have more time to actually listen to what she says. That's what makes a relationship, is the willingness to work at it when it's hard. Wendy W.There is nothing more dangerous than breaking a basic safety rule and getting away with it. It removes fear of the consequences and builds false confidence. (tbrown) Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
5432154321 0 #31 March 24, 2006 QuoteIt's a huge red flag. But if you care about her and the relationship, this is where you invest some work into it, and talk to her. Plan what you want to ask, what you want to say, and what you expect to hear, so that you have more time to actually listen to what she says. That's what makes a relationship, is the willingness to work at it when it's hard. Yup. Bravo!!! If you love this girl, time to act like adults and get to the bottom of this. You guys aren't in college any more. --- xenaswampjumper SPANKS THIS ASS!!! I WISH karenmeal spanked this ass too..... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
jeiber 0 #32 March 24, 2006 QuoteShe's not screwing around so why should I. Um, yeah... since you don't know about it, it couldn't possibly be happening, right? I think you're life is about to change. JeffShhh... you hear that sound? That's the sound of nobody caring! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
jeiber 0 #33 March 24, 2006 QuoteShe is fucking someone else. Period. End of story. You're not the slightest bit jaded right now, are ya? Man, seems like everyone has been cheating the past couple weeks! I feel left out... JShhh... you hear that sound? That's the sound of nobody caring! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Icon134 0 #34 March 24, 2006 QuoteMan, seems like everyone has been cheating the past couple weeks! I feel left out... Its just like the John Mayer song... "St Patrick's Day"Livin' on the Edge... sleeping with my rigger's wife... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
PhreeZone 20 #35 March 24, 2006 Swing by and get a blood test done, its better to be safe then not anymore.Yesterday is history And tomorrow is a mystery Parachutemanuals.com Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Richards 0 #36 March 24, 2006 Two possibilities A: She is geniunely putting your needs first, and you would be an ingrate to take advantage of her selflessness. B: She has been with someone else and feels that allowing you to do the same thing will ease her conscience (has she been acting strange lately? Other than the bizarre offer?) Your call, Richards My biggest handicap is that sometimes the hole in the front of my head operates a tad bit faster than the grey matter contained within. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Girlfalldown 0 #37 March 24, 2006 QuoteQuoteShe is fucking someone else. Period. End of story. You're not the slightest bit jaded right now, are ya? Man, seems like everyone has been cheating the past couple weeks! I feel left out... J Not everyone! And trust me, that is one thing you want to feel left out of. Being cheated on sucks and can fuck up your view of relationships for a long long time. -------------- (Do not, I repeat DO NOT, take my posts seriously.) Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
lawrocket 3 #38 March 24, 2006 Quotethings have been rough lately because of her schoolwork and life in general. This says plenty. I've been on her end of it, and had ZERO time for a clingy woman. When I graduated from law school, I told me gf at the time that for the next two months, I would be simply unavailable because I will be devoting 14 hours per day to studying for the bar. That's it. Period. I'm sorry, but I'm being honest. It didn't work out too well. She unfortunately thought that I didn't mean it. She was clingy and I was unable to be there for her. She thought I must be cheating on her. Her friends thought I must be cheating on her. Then she did a couple of very hurtful things. I ended it. I am NOT going to assume, like others, that she is with someone else. I've been in her spot, and it's a tough spot to be in. Perhaps you've been clingy with her. Why else would it be rough due to her schedule? She's harving a hard time - unable to do what she WANTS to do, but finishing out her responsibilities. What is she up to this weekend? Do you know? If you know it's related to work or school (end of March means midterms to me) then you know it's not because she's messing around. I'd encourage you to take the high road. I'd encourage you to think the best of this. I'd also encourage you to know that this relationship might just be in its denoument. Very few relationships can withstand the demands of of a job and graduate-level education. Mine did not. Speak with her about her comments. Be open and honest about everything - how you feel, what you are thinking, etc. Ask her to be open and honest, too. Ask her whether you are being too clingy, etc. She's probably not even in the mood for much romance over the past several months. If so, she is aware. Still, it's not the easiest thing to hear. The best thing to do is talk to her. "I know you are busy, but we need to talk now. No, I'm not angry, but I am concerned and need to discuss something you said." Good luck. My wife is hotter than your wife. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
cocheese 0 #39 March 24, 2006 She's just PMSing and needs some chocolate. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
jeiber 0 #40 March 24, 2006 QuoteThe best thing to do is talk to her. "I know you are busy, but we need to talk now. No, I'm not angry, but I am concerned and need to discuss something you said." Then go to the reunion and bury it to the hilt of an old flame! Hey, she gave you permission!Shhh... you hear that sound? That's the sound of nobody caring! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Girlfalldown 0 #41 March 24, 2006 I dated a guy from the end of his med-school, through the time when he took the boards, all the way through his internship. Then we moved up to San Francisco and I continued to date and live with him through his residency. It was 4+ agonizing years for both of us. I ended up leaving him just before he finished his residency because I couldn't take the mental distance. Everyone says doctors should date doctors because only they can truly understand. I guess it must be similar with lawyers and other similar types. I know at times I must have seemed clingy and insecure and at other times he seemed to be banging another resident. Who knows what really happened. Anyway, I do know that she's going through a really tough time and I agree with lawrocket. Don't just assume she's with someone else. Instead, ask her. Point blank. Ask her what you want to know, tell her what is bothering you and deal with it like an adult. Don't play games and don't let her play them with you if you feel that's what's going on. I have spoken. -------------- (Do not, I repeat DO NOT, take my posts seriously.) Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
lawrocket 3 #42 March 24, 2006 QuoteQuoteThe best thing to do is talk to her. "I know you are busy, but we need to talk now. No, I'm not angry, but I am concerned and need to discuss something you said." Then go to the reunion and bury it to the hilt of an old flame! Hey, she gave you permission! Exactly. And when one of my ex-girlfriends years ago said, "you should slap me" because "I was such a bitch" I should have given her five across the eyes! After all, not only did she give me permission, she actually told me to do it. Damn, I shoulda given her the back of my hand, eh? Of, boy, the regrets I have today for not hitting her. It's been a life of personal hell since then - my regrets at wondering how different things could have been had I bloodied her nose a bit. That damned conscience of mine. My wife is hotter than your wife. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Bolas 5 #43 March 24, 2006 QuoteOk, my girlfriend called me from work just now and said : "if you want to have sex with someone at your 20th college reunion that would be fine.... Call her from the reunion and tell her, "You said I could have sex, so I'm calling for phone sex." Stupidity if left untreated is self-correcting If ya can't be good, look good, if that fails, make 'em laugh. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Girlfalldown 0 #44 March 24, 2006 Quote Call her from the reunion and tell her, "You said I could have sex, so I'm calling for phone sex." Awe, that's cute. -------------- (Do not, I repeat DO NOT, take my posts seriously.) Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
billvon 3,059 #45 March 24, 2006 I know this is a dumb thing to say but - why not ask her what she means instead of us? She could mean anything from "I know you've really wanted to do Suzie forever and I think it would be best for both of us if you got it out of the way" to "I want an open relationship" to "I don't want to feel guilty if I see Jack again and we do it." Nobody here knows which one it is. She does. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
masterrig 1 #46 March 24, 2006 I'd say, keep your nose clean! Then, what happens...happens. The main thing is, you'll have a clear conscience. I don't think, she's 'screwin' around' on you. She may be 'testing' you and your fidelity. Stay on the straight and narrow and you can't go wrong. That's just what I'd do. What you do in the 'end', is up to you. Chuck Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
ryno1972 0 #47 March 24, 2006 I think she is stressed out with life in general. When my wife gets stressed, it bleeds over into our relationship (ie. sex life, stupid arguements). She might be a little jealous that she cannot go with you. I say buy her some flowers, or perfume or something, go out to eat, have a couple of drinks and make her feel good. You will get rewarded for your effort.glad to be here!! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
leroydb 0 #48 March 24, 2006 dont do itLeroy ..I knew I was an unwanted baby when I saw my bath toys were a toaster and a radio... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Thanatos340 1 #49 March 24, 2006 Dude.. I think everyone has it all wrong..... Here is the real deal. She knows you are off your game and wants to prove it to you. Her Plan.. Give you permission to go Bang some High School Sweetheart from 20 years ago.. But she knows either... A. You are way off your game and will only strike out.. or B. Your high Shoool Sweetheart is now too Fat and Ugly and you wouldn’t be able to get it up anyway. Sooo.. She gives you permission... You go and try.. find out that you don’t have the Mojo anymore and come home crawling back to her cause she has just proven to you that she is the best you will be able to get. She gets to take the High road for then next 20 years (She gave you your Chance to get some strange.. and you struck out.. not her fault) while destroying your confidence at the same time. Pretty Smart Chick if you ask me. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
turtlespeed 226 #50 March 24, 2006 QuoteOk, my girlfriend called me from work just now and said : "if you want to have sex with someone at your 20th college reunion that would be fine....I'm focused on getting my masters right now and you do what you have to do, what ever happens happens." WTF does that mean? Background info: together for three years. its a getaway weekend reunion at a hotel resort. Yeah, we joke around about hooking up and its funny but...serious??!! She's not screwing around so why should I. We have conflicting schedules that weekend and she can't go to my reunion. yes things have been rough lately because of her schoolwork and life in general. I don't even know if I will be attraced to anyone there and even if I am how is that going to play out when I get back? Holy shit Batgirl what a predicament! Simply - it means - Don't Go To The Reunion With Out Me!I'm not usually into the whole 3-way thing, but you got me a little excited with that. - Skymama BTR #1 / OTB^5 Official #2 / Hellfish #408 / VSCR #108/Tortuga/Orfun Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
