captainquim 0 #1 January 2, 2006 there once was a monkey named pichoko. he lived in a hill of karma beans with pink flowers on the side and tropicana flowed like flowy things. one day, a dark cloud came over the hill with baboons in tow, and flicked the switch of terrifying flying thorn bushes. oh no! what was pichoko to do? well, fortunately he had his trusty ant hole, and he climbed inside and did nothing for five years. eventually, once his leg had grown back, since in the second year he had to cut it off to feed the pet cats that had moved in next door and erected a monstrosity of a conservatory, he crawled out and readjusted his eyes to the light with the revolutionary new mind patch that ran off a hand held pc running linux. this being done, he set about building the new world order of competitive fence erection, running down The Great Ridge. numerous challenges were surmounted including but not excluding and including again - the formation of hillside cheese eating picnic centres, the now world famous artificially intelligent lama races (they were born out of the collaboration between the feared penguin and whirpool washing machine alliance, bringing great leaps in sandwich manufacture technology - you will, of course, know the hairy loose leaf sweetcorn munch and retarded duck mayonnaise combo that took the south american 2 minute baguette challenge by storm), the oppression of the newly resplendent ox farmers that had beguiled the princess of the third vegetable patch on the left of the greenhouse belonging to geoffrey, that produced the world's largest organically grown swede (which we fondly remember as No. 6, and was the main ingredient in the fantastic pie that missus hobergauder made for the joyous shed party in november). this is of course not an exhaustive list, and new challenges arise daily, nay, hourly and are formally logged by the council of badger baiters in league with afghan jelly farmers, that tirelessly minute the sit down meetings conducted in spanish only. being a very lucky monkey, his gas cooker had an extra hob dedicated to the furtherment of egg boiling technology, bringing back the watercress growing races that characterised the fifth dynasty (the years between the rules of the gregory and fullumly families) and left an indelible imprint on the psyches of all known arthropods, which were forced to hop on only one toe, and hence developed very hardy immune systems, making them ideal for food service. nose licking has become popular, as pichoko took to sporting a raspberry compote on his nasal orifice, and being a cumly fellow, was happy for the tongues of a nation to stroke his facial area. now i'm sure you will be concerned to return to the weighty matter of those pesky cats and that conservatory.... musky tones, and grape rolling saved a famished smith family, and pichoko was forced onto the back foot! being a child of the cubist era, he did like a slouch now and then, but due to unforseen spring weakening, the sofas had become uncomfortable, and standing whilst watching the tv was now en vogue. so, in the end, it was all just a raging effulent geyser, fuelling the growth of lychen in the lower part of the hill which undermined the vegetable farmers, and hence wheelchairs were stockpiled and created the new continent of eropos. now i realise that all this seems unconnected, but viewed from the vantage point of being hungarian, i think that we all see that a final showdown with the gravy boat designers is unavoidable. pichoko, being a canny statesmen realised this from the very beginning, and had mortgaged his bmx with the gold trick bars, and deposited the sizeable proceeds in an environmentally concious equity plan managed by jon the african. jon with his voluminous knowledge of bamboo growing, had contacted the head of the indian eugenics program violations committee on tuesday the 3rd, which is incongruent with all the teachings of betty boothroyd, as such meetings were decreed to take place on wednesdays. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
NlghtJumper 0 #2 January 2, 2006 Aight... I am completely and utterly lost. I tried keeping up and was semi-successful until about the second paragraph... Then I just gave up! Maybe one day when I am older and wiser, I might be able to decipher this strange other-worldly message... A man will do anything for the right woman, and when that woman destroys him, that man will become a hunk of meat with the common sense of a rodeo clown! ~ Christopher Titus Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
waltappel 1 #3 January 2, 2006 Put the crack pipe down!!! Walt Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
akarunway 1 #5 January 2, 2006 LSD anyone?I hold it true, whate'er befall; I feel it, when I sorrow most; 'Tis better to have loved and lost Than never to have loved at all. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
NlghtJumper 0 #6 January 2, 2006 Well at least I'm not the only one... How far did you guys get before giving up this futile effort of understanding? A man will do anything for the right woman, and when that woman destroys him, that man will become a hunk of meat with the common sense of a rodeo clown! ~ Christopher Titus Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
captainquim 0 #7 January 2, 2006 listen up, you have to look for the REAL meaning. the sexually deviant, uplifting, rabit rearing... whatever... meaning. see? it's all about the 80s Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
RhondaLea 4 #8 January 2, 2006 There are several sites that create such "prose." Ashtanga posted one such in another thread. Edited to add: I generally don't read posts that don't come neatly packaged in paragraphs. They make me dizzy. rlIf you don't know where you're going, you should know where you came from. Gullah Proverb Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
captainquim 0 #9 January 2, 2006 or, you could just use the good old sex muscle, nooooo..... your head. head. see, when it comes to the underside of a roof garden, no man can compete with the orange, sometimes gravy tasting tones of a complete stranger's waxed tash. innit Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
thawk58 0 #10 January 2, 2006 WTF..........Lost? I didn't even get started....Alice in wonderland magic mushroom trip couldn't even decipher that rambling Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
waltappel 1 #11 January 2, 2006 Quotelisten up, you have to look for the REAL meaning. the sexually deviant, uplifting, rabit rearing... whatever... meaning. see? it's all about the 80s Nobody who was a full participant in the 80s remembers much about it. Walt Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
NlghtJumper 0 #12 January 2, 2006 Yeah, I definatly dont remember it... then again, I wouldnt consider being born in the 80's as being a full participant... A man will do anything for the right woman, and when that woman destroys him, that man will become a hunk of meat with the common sense of a rodeo clown! ~ Christopher Titus Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
yamtx73 0 #13 January 2, 2006 QuoteQuotelisten up, you have to look for the REAL meaning. the sexually deviant, uplifting, rabit rearing... whatever... meaning. see? it's all about the 80s Nobody who was a full participant in the 80s remembers much about it. Walt 80's?? hell, what happened to the 70's?? I think I lost a decade somewhere....The only naturals in this sport shit thru feathers... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
crwpj 0 #14 January 2, 2006 QuoteNobody who was a full participant in the 80s remembers much about it i dare you to tell that to anyone who was at Tienemann Square, or involved in launching the Challenger. you could even tell it to the Texas researchers who found a treatment that was effective in saving the life of a patient who needed a bone marrow transplant when no donor could be found. i will not speak for any of those people, however i would tend to think their participation in the eighties was full. i am not saying it wasn't a fun time. i'm just saying some people sacrificed their lives, and some people saved some lives. In the eighties there were "good people in the world". even though they may have been so selfish that, rather than feed a stray dog, they stood in front of a tank(let's face it, you only stand in front of a tank if you want to, and that is just selfish). i consider some of them to be heroes, and i'm sure some of them have vivid memories of twenty years ago. you dishonor them as well as yourself when you sayQuoteNobody who was a full participant in the 80s remembers much about it blue stuff, p.j. pulling is cool. keep it in the skin. options: it does a body good. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
NlghtJumper 0 #15 January 2, 2006 QuoteIn the eighties there were "good people in the world". even though they may have been so selfish that, rather than feed a stray dog, they stood in front of a tank(let's face it, you only stand in front of a tank if you want to, and that is just selfish). I wouldnt say that to the men and women who are currently over seas making sure you have the right to say stuff like that. I dont think that those who volunteered [no draft needed] to stand on the front lines for you, is selfish in any sense of the word. In case you didnt know, I am one of those men and women who volunteered. I am currently in Afghanistan, and I take great offense to what you decided is so selfish of us. And yes, being an avid dog lover, I am one who would also stop to feed the stray dog... A man will do anything for the right woman, and when that woman destroys him, that man will become a hunk of meat with the common sense of a rodeo clown! ~ Christopher Titus Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Lindercles 0 #16 January 2, 2006 yeah, walt. jeez, you're such a dick. what were you thinking?? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
waltappel 1 #17 January 2, 2006 Quoteyeah, walt. jeez, you're such a dick. what were you thinking?? I was sitting around thinking, "Hmmm, since I'm a dick and my chosen profession is to piss people off, I need to think of a good way to start some shit." "I know--I'll dishonor the memory of people who did significant things in the 80's. NOBODY could ignore such a flagrant disregard for humanity like that!!!! People's heads will explode; it will cause old men to have strokes and old ladies to cry uncontrollably. It will start wars and set off natural disasters!!!!" "I will be in a league with Charles Manson!!!! Am I good, or what? I can die happy now. Walt Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
waltappel 1 #18 January 2, 2006 Well, at least now I know for sure that I'm not the only one not getting laid!!! Walt Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
crwpj 0 #19 January 2, 2006 QuoteWell, at least now I know for sure that I'm not the only one not getting laid!!! you would know more if you did more listening and less talking. pulling is cool. keep it in the skin. options: it does a body good. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
waltappel 1 #20 January 2, 2006 QuoteQuoteWell, at least now I know for sure that I'm not the only one not getting laid!!! you would know more if you did more listening and less talking. Are you just having a bad day today? Walt Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
captainquim 0 #21 January 2, 2006 crwpj, a bit menstrual today crwpj? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
waltappel 1 #22 January 2, 2006 I think he got turned around. He must think this is Speakers Corner. Walt Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
captainquim 0 #23 January 2, 2006 oh well, don't blame him. we all get confused sometimes. now and then i think i'm batman Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
waltappel 1 #24 January 2, 2006 Quoteoh well, don't blame him. we all get confused sometimes. now and then i think i'm batman So you're NOT batman?!!! I used to quite regularly think I was good-looking, charming, intelligent, and downright witty. Then I would get sober. Yuk!!!! edited to add: crwpj: I hope my smartass remarks aren't making you have a worse day. I really mean no harm.Walt Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Lindercles 0 #25 January 2, 2006 Quotecrwpj: I hope my smartass remarks aren't making you have a worse day. I really mean no harm. Woah there, hoss. That almost sounded genuine. We wouldn't want you ruining a perfectly good bad reputation by actually being compassionate. Now go back to poisoning racoons, kicking stray dogs, and making posts about how much you hate women. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
