Ethical/Attraction question

[karenmeal 0]

I am taking a homework break and looking through this book of questions that I have. I found one question that I thought might be fairly thought provoking... (and somewhat related to sex) so.. (and I modified it slightly)

If you were to meet someone that you were very attracted to, physically, mentally, etc., that you respected and then you found out that they were in a relationship..

How would that affect your actions? Would you continue to pursue them? Would it matter to you if they were very satisfied in their relationship vs. not so satisfied?

Now I'm not talking everyday attraction, but like, Wow! kind of stuff.

Just curious what people do in this sort of ethical dilemma.

-Karen

"Life is a temporary victory over the causes which induce death." - Sylvester Graham

[BillyVance 34]

I think this happened quite often on "Friends"...

"Mediocre people don't like high achievers, and high achievers don't like mediocre people." - SIX TIME National Champion coach Nick Saban

[karenmeal 0]

I guess I'm curious what skydivers would do.. since we're all perverts and what not.

"Life is a temporary victory over the causes which induce death." - Sylvester Graham

[jtval 0]

it doesnt seem to stop anyone else.

and honestly who am I to get in the way of what COULD be true love.


IF i found someone that I thought was a great match for me I would test the waters a bit and tryto pursue it.

If I just wanted to fuck..I would probably just leave it alone

My photos

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[SBS 0]

It depends on their level of commitment, the level of WOW!, and how happy they are.

-S

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I'm not conceited...I'm just realistic about my awesomeness...

[airtwardo 7]

Just curious what people do in this sort of ethical dilemma


***

Usually 20 to Life if caught...

~ If you choke a Smurf, what color does it turn? ~

[karenmeal 0]

Say they're engaged and co-habituating, level of wow = high and they are happy.

"Life is a temporary victory over the causes which induce death." - Sylvester Graham

[NWFlyer 2]

I might let the person know I was interested, but I would also also respect the existing relationship that they have. Especially if they are married. If someone is looking to end a marriage, I don't want to be a party to that. They can come find me after that's all said and done.

"There is only one basic human right, the right to do as you damn well please. And with it comes the only basic human duty, the duty to take the consequences." -P.J. O'Rourke

[lisamariewillbe 1]

Then it would have to be a no, then again skydivers want their cake and eat it too so maybe some might think to send nekkid pictures to the guy might change his mind, or profess their un-dying love, but to be honest the ethics would be on the people in the relationship... do they bite or reject, or forward said nekkid pics to the girlfriend for her viewing as well?

Sudsy Fist: i don't think i'd ever say this
Sudsy Fist: but you're looking damn sudsydoable in this

[jtval 0]

ok i said it..now what? LOL


j/k
well if she was happy I would probably mind my own business. but I would have to talk with her a bit and decide for myself that the woman I MAY thikn could be my soul mate was INDEED not that woman.


JSUT b/c I feel that way for her doesn't mean I have the right to fuck up her life with WHAT if's

most of the time those WHAT if's turn into WHY ME's

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[SBS 0]

If they are happy, I would let it be.

Unless she was as hot as you, of course... ;-)

-S

_____________
I'm not conceited...I'm just realistic about my awesomeness...

[Lindercles 0]

if this is the kind of woman who will leave her live in fiancee, whom she is happy with, for some dude she just met, do i really want to date her?

[karenmeal 0]

wait..

do I know you?

"Life is a temporary victory over the causes which induce death." - Sylvester Graham

[SBS 0]

Do you mean to stab me in the heart?

_____________
I'm not conceited...I'm just realistic about my awesomeness...

[Lindercles 0]

Quote

wait..

do I know you?

me? i don't think so

[airtwardo 7]

Quote

if this is the kind of woman who will leave her live in fiancee, whom she is happy with, for some dude she just met, do i really want to date her?

***

Yeah....as opposed to merely stalking her?!

~ If you choke a Smurf, what color does it turn? ~

[karenmeal 0]

I guess so? Sorry, I've had some drinks.

"Life is a temporary victory over the causes which induce death." - Sylvester Graham

[SBS 0]

No, you don't know me. And I do have pretty high standards, so I guess I shouldn't assume...

*ducking for cover*

_____________
I'm not conceited...I'm just realistic about my awesomeness...

[airtwardo 7]

And I do have pretty high standards,

***

in SUNNYVALE????????

~ If you choke a Smurf, what color does it turn? ~

[SBS 0]

I know, I was bluffing...I have no standards...

_____________
I'm not conceited...I'm just realistic about my awesomeness...

[1969912 0]

If she were in a good relationship, I would not pursue. if she were in a bad relationship, I would provide support if desired/requested, but a little pursuit might be mixed in. Still, I feel that it would be unethical to perform heavy pursuit or try to make the bad relationship fail, but being human....

"Once we got to the point where twenty/something's needed a place on the corner that changed the oil in their cars we were doomed . . ."
-NickDG

[jtval 0]

are you saying that the only women you can get is one with low self esteem? LOL



J/K but thats kinda of the type of thing that would probably end up in a WHY ME thing that i was refering to.

its best if they have a clear head about YOU and not just looking for ANYONE who listens

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[CanuckInUSA 0]

I would let them continue in the exisiting relationship since I wouldn't want someone interferring with my relationship if the shoe was on the other foot. We can't always get what we want, and some/many relationships don't last. So why put yourself into a situation where others can get hurt and others may end up making enemies with you only because of your lust. Of course I'm not saying you're actually doing this to someone else ... or are you?

Then again what do I know ... I'm single (which has it's pros and cons).

Try not to worry about the things you have no control over

[Nightingale 0]

If they are in a relationship, they are off limits and will be treated strictly as a friend.

[Beverly 1]

I would suggest a visit to the Woman's Forum to see the responses to the people that have been on the other end of a broken relationship due to infidelity.

I was too, the girl persued and broke up my 10 year co-habit relationship, because "She wanted what me and my guy had"

It was horriffic! My life as I knew it ended.

If anyone would think of doing that they have no respect or honour.
It does not matter if the relationship is perfect or not, rather wait until it is completely over and be a support structure if necessary, and maybe something can happen.

If not, leave the hell alone!

I think true friendship is under-rated

Twitter: @Dreamskygirlsa