Open Letter Thread

[dixieskydiver 0]

First of all:

Dear Sangiro,

You rock.

Dixie


Dear Coca-cola,

You are the nectar of life, Ambrosia. Please find a diet formula that tastes as good as the real thing so I can lose some weight. I'm way too lazy to do it by exercising and my fall rate and wing loading are getting out of control!

Thanks,
Dixie


Dear Hot DZ.com Women,

How y'all doin'?

Sincerely,
Dixie


Dear Empty Wallet,

I went to Rantoul and you were full of money. Now you are completely empty. WTF mate?

Dixie

Dear Beer,

Mmmmmmmmmm Beer. What would my life be without you?

Dixie


Dear Indiana Skydiver Girl,

You stole my sheet. So not cool. I gave back your shirt, WTH? That was a nice, albeit slightly smelly, sheet! If I had known I would have kept that shirt and jumped in it! Send me my sheet back!

Dixie

Dear Lil Sis,

I know that when you were packing for college you thought you couldn't possibly live without all of your possesions, but being as how you were curiously absent when my ass had to haul all 20 boxes up the four flights of stairs to your dorm in 100 degree humid ass fucking heat you may in the future do it your damned self.

Your Brother

Dixie
HISPA #56 Facil Rodriguez
"Scientific research has shown that 60% of the time, it works every time."

[RevJim 0]

Dear people of Iraq,

I may be visiting soon, to help rebuild your country. Please do not kill me, ok?

Rev

Dear KBR, Halliburton,

Please, arm me, and arm me well...

Rev

Dear Sky,

Please be welcoming and blue when I return.

Rev

It's your life, live it!
Karma
RB#684 "Corcho", ASK#60, Muff#3520, NCB#398, NHDZ#4, C-33989, DG#1

[VanillaSkyGirl 6]

Dear SKY,

I miss you so very much. I think about you all the time. My beloved TUNNEL sees me every so often, but it's just not the same...

Always,
ROSA

[swedishcelt 0]

Dear ground,

WTH did I ever do to you? I have never littered and man, that just hurt.

Swedishcelt

Dear leg,

Weakling!!

Swedishcelt

Dear Sky,

I miss you too.

Swedishcelt

[BGill 0]

Dear Dixie,

whatever you were smoking when you came up with this thread... fuckin share it man!!!

your bastard son,
casa suerte rodriguez


Dear life,

just one more day in the week would be great. hell, just add a few hours to each day and that would actually solve most of my problems.

bgill


Dear work,

HAHAHAHA!!!! I QUIT BITCHES!!!!!

bgill


Dear school,

damnit, you made me quit my job. now i have to revert back to my old (and less lucrative) job that works around my school schedule. bastard.

bgill


Dear midgets with mullets,

you rock. keep up the good work.

bgill

[RevJim 0]

Dear bgill,

That initiation was weak...

Your bastard grandpa,
Rev

It's your life, live it!
Karma
RB#684 "Corcho", ASK#60, Muff#3520, NCB#398, NHDZ#4, C-33989, DG#1

[dixieskydiver 0]

Dear Ants That Are Invading My House,

You suck. Stop finding every single empty Coke can I leave near the computer desk. Although I do take some pleasure in smashing you all with my index finger one by one, it's getting out of control. I put the cat down so now I am free to employ all manner of pesticides on you. Beware.

Dixie

Dixie
HISPA #56 Facil Rodriguez
"Scientific research has shown that 60% of the time, it works every time."

[NWFlyer 2]

Dear Road Rash on my Right Leg:
Heal faster, damnit.

Sincerely,
Scabby girl


Dear Wednesday:
Get here, soon, so's I can jump.

Sincerely,
8 days without jumping

"There is only one basic human right, the right to do as you damn well please. And with it comes the only basic human duty, the duty to take the consequences." -P.J. O'Rourke

[calledisrael 0]

Dear shoulder,
Please stop itching and hurting so damned much. I know I let that guy probe around all inside of you with some needles and cameras and other assorted metallic instruments of torture, but this is for your own good, so that we can both get back in the sky and you can do your job like you are supposed to. I promise he'll take the stitches out soon.
So until then, chill out, and heal faster.
Sincerely,
C.I.

life is either a daring adventure or nothing at all.
(helen keller)

[wildWilly 0]

LMAO

Great attitude!
Get back in the sky soon.

Willy

growing old is inevitable, growing up is optional.

[ACMESkydiver 0]

Dear [censor],

I miss you. I want to feel you. From the inside. All over. The way I like it. The way you like it. You know you want it again and again, like we've done so many times before...

Come here you little [censor]!

I know you want me to sit on your [censor]. You love that, don't ya? Sure you do...

But of course it always ends the same way with you, doesn't it? You cheap little whore! You always let me take a ride to heaven and then dump me with just a moment's warning. You turn your back and leave, never looking back once.

But I'll be back anyway, dammit. I always do. It's just a matter of when. How long can I hold out before I give in to that sexy purr...

I hate this relationship, but I need it.











Fuck you, 38D!

~Jaye
Do not believe that possibly you can escape the reward of your action.

[waltappel 1]

I'm envious. Why don't I ever get any open letters like that!

Walt

[ACMESkydiver 0]

Quote

I'm envious. Why don't I ever get any open letters like that!

Walt

Do you have wings?

~Jaye
Do not believe that possibly you can escape the reward of your action.

[jumpchikk 0]

Dear Tard,

Learn how to flare your canopy so you can finally have some more stand up landings. You are killing my knees.

Love Always,

Les

Dear Boss,

Where in the hell is my raise?

Your hardworking legal assistant,

Lesley

Dear Weekend,

Hurry up and get here. I need to have some more Girl Scout cookies.

Sincerely,

L

[waltappel 1]

Quote

Quote

I'm envious. Why don't I ever get any open letters like that!

Walt

Do you have wings?

If you mean angel wings, no, definitely not, and my prospects for getting them any time soon (or any time at all, for that matter) are looking kind of bleak.

Walt

[j0nes 0]

fyi:

censor = j0nes

[waltappel 1]

Quote

fyi:

censor = j0nes

Open letter to j0nes:

Thankyou for taking the heat off of me on a very regular basis. For a very long time I have known my purpose in life to be making other people seem great by comparison, but it's nice to have a vacation now and then.

You, my friend, have been making me look like a fairly nice alternative at times lately.

Thanks!!!

Walt

[j0nes 0]

Quote

You, my friend, have been making me look like a fairly nice alternative at times lately.

I live to serve. You're welcome sweetie.

[ACMESkydiver 0]

Quote

Quote

Quote

I'm envious. Why don't I ever get any open letters like that!

Walt

Do you have wings?

If you mean angel wings, no, definitely not, and my prospects for getting them any time soon (or any time at all, for that matter) are looking kind of bleak.

Walt

Dear Walt,

No need for jealousy. Wings or not, I'm sure you smell better than the inside of 38D anyhow.
Jaye P.

~Jaye
Do not believe that possibly you can escape the reward of your action.

[waltappel 1]

Quote

Dear Walt,

No need for jealousy. Wings or not, I'm sure you smell better than the inside of 38D anyhow.
Jaye P.

Yuk!!!

Walt

[airtwardo 7]

Dear Santa~

As you know we open our presents on Christmas eve, long after the stores are closed...

Next time please INCLUDE the batteries, wife was pissed!

~ If you choke a Smurf, what color does it turn? ~

[swedishcelt 0]

Are you a woman?

[dixieskydiver 0]

Dear Guy Sitting Behind Me At The Waffle House At 5 AM:

What the fuck old dude. I've been out night drinking with people 3 times my body mass who are intent on getting themselves drunk and insisting that I match them drink for drink and I've finally staggered into the Waffle House at 5 am to sober the fuck up before I go to bed. Is it REALLY fucking necessary for you to make the most DISGUSTING fucking sounds you can directly behind me. Your mucus problems interest me not in the least, go see a fucking doctor. Christ. As if I didn't need to puke before I walked in there I also have to eat the food and listen to you! Even the WH employees made disgusted faces when you went to the bathroom and that is fucking saying something.

This semi-sober rant has been brought to you by:

Dixie

Dixie
HISPA #56 Facil Rodriguez
"Scientific research has shown that 60% of the time, it works every time."

[dzdiva 7]

Dear Mr. Right,

Where the hell are you?

Dear Mr. Wrong,

How is it that you always know where to find me? If you run into Mr. Right could you please give him my phone number?!

Dear friends,

Thank you for always being there. I am blessed to have you in my life.
Dear Sky,

Thank you for always being there and giving me peace.

"It's not just a daydream if you choose to make it your life..."

[kenz 0]

dear left ankle,

i've been very good to you since you were injured, so will you please hurry the hell up so i can jump again?!? thanks :)

dear u of d,

can you please stop screwing up my schedule and classes EVERY freakin semester so i can finally graduate and move on with my life!!

dear friends and family,

you are all awesome and i love all of you guys dearly, you mean the world to me !!

dear dz.com'rs

thanks for always making my days more than entertaining :) you guys are all great, and thanks for letting me be a part of it..

"life does throw curveballs sometimes but it doesn't mean we shouldn't still swing for the homerun" ~ me