0
flyinchicken

Alright! I've had it with winter. Looking for fake husband so I can move to AZ and jump for the rest of my life.

Recommended Posts

Quote


OMG Chicken!
:o




I am opening a Canadian Ladies Only Winter foster home in Tucson, 45 minutes from Eloy. Great French Chef. Views on Mt. Lemmon located in the Catalina foothills, pool. regular shuttle to the DZ.

Applicants are requested to present face and full body shots along with resume, weight and measures, age, education, vices, tattoos, piercings and wing loading. number of jumps etc.. All kind of trade will be considered.

Reflex jumpers may not apply.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Psst.... Why not try Vancouver (hint, hint). Open almost all year round, I think. It's pretty temperate for Canada. I was there in December a few years ago and it was sometimes warm enough to go without a jacket. Never saw any snow except in the Rockies.

Although I am a mere Ottawa mortal that has to suffer these winters too, I'm sure there are some cuties out west. Much easier than moving down south ;)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Quote

Reflex jumpers may not apply.


I guess Karen is safe then! ;)




She jumps a Reflex? eww... that hurts! ;)
Well you guys have purple too so... you are not salvagable!
But it might be time to get her a proper container especially you you decide to seriously get out of your r-dub suits.

Back to the Canadian Foster home... I though you guys just acquired a large house in the vicinity of my area? It will be nice you and K can come visit you fellow Canadian-ettes as often as you wish.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
reflexes are fine FF rigs! :P When packed right! lol.. the last rigger who did her reserve packed so large at the bottom that her main container is all ugly now...

But in any event, we're shopping around already... ;)


As far as our home goes, I asked karen and we cant have live-in "guests" :D
Remster

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Quote

I hate winter in Canada so much, I am willing to prostitute mlyself to some poor skydiver that lives in the south.

Ok here goes......................
You gotta put up with my bitching.
~
(No problem….put up with ex-wife for over 12 years!):P
~
I talk in my sleep but I still like too cuddle.
~
(I only mumble in my sleep! Cuddling is fine also!);)
~
Sleep with whoever you want as long as I get to do the same,(if my chick is hotter than yours, no whining and no threesomes, trust me, they are boring).
~
(OK as long as I get to watch occasionally!):)
~
I will provide sexual favours,(as long as they don't scare the shit out of me).
~
(I only scare myself!....maybe I shouldn’t have said that!):S
~
If you keep me medicated, I'm a lot of fun,(Vodka is NOT suggested).
~
(all the Southern Comfort you can drink!):o
~
I need to be able to climb and jump year round or the bitchy part gets worse.
~
(Not a lot to climb around here, North Georgia mountains not too far away! We jump YEAR ROUND including the BEST beach jumps you will ever make!........Loads of FUN!)B|
:)
Photos attatched.................

Man I hate winter!
>:(



"You made my panties wet!" Skymama (Fitz 09)
"Never argue with an idiot. They will bring you down to their level and beat you with experience."

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Come to Dallas I moved down here to escape the horrid Illinois winters, I lived in AZ awhile back, I think you should come to TX instead, Have you seen The Last Unicorn? the bitching part is fine I have large speakers to drown you out, I don't cuddle a whole lot when I sleep though, Hey have as many women as you want the more the merrier right. I don't think I person the rest of one's life is plausible it just wasn't meant to be that way... anyhow I should go work. I'm the one on the right, cowboy hat optional can be used as sex prop if you like it!!! You gotta love Dogs though I have a large German Sheperd.



***Glory Favors the Bold***

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Jay, Im pretty sure she wouldnt care about a ring, she just wants to be closer to a warm dz, hell let her stay in the van, she seems low maintence, and uhhh dont forget to set those hidden cameras up in the van;)
Sudsy Fist: i don't think i'd ever say this
Sudsy Fist: but you're looking damn sudsydoable in this

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Sup Chicky?!! It's me, Nick.

So you lookin' to sell the ol' sole eh? Max is moving out there on the 25th. He's going to be staying with Sarah and Curtis. I'd suggest you marry him but he's and ass... and he's foreign. :D


Hey, btw, where were you this weekend? Your brother and father both did their :D solos yesterday! :)



My Karma ran over my Dogma!!!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Before you make your final decision consider this...

I live a short plane ride to any DZ in the country.
I have no expections for pool cleaning and/or yard work or housework of any kind.
I can send you my bank account number as a good-faith offer.
I'm really good at eliminating causes of bitchiness - except for hormone-induced rants.
I have no outstanding warrants against me.

My only requirement is to not be late for the limo to the DZ.

Welcome to Georgia!:D;)
My reality and yours are quite different.
I think we're all Bozos on this bus.
Falcon5232, SCS8170, SCSA353, POPS9398, DS239

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
hmmm...
Chicken, this is attesting to be a very attractive thread.

~ You have popsjumper c**kblocking bill
~ 3 Hot skychicka's supporting/wanting boobie shots
~ A few Texas Cowboys, one with the name DIVERSGODOWN... gIDDYuP!
~ Zee French Chef with Zee palace... good thing you sold the Reflex! (oh...and he thinks canadian girls are Easy)
~ There's even a gay man offering to be a Fake Husband.
~ The Soldier in Iraq with a harem of lively consorts, with it's reprimands and rewards... Hey, can I buy your tent?

Its an "all American after school special":D

and.... well... I don't even know what to say about Max~~

Buried said: Does the winner get a test drive?
...hmm... can't answer that... but I can offer the "winner" some cleavage shots from the yearend party... and the "real" story behind the name "Flyin'Chicken"... I know you'll truly enjoy... I did!;)

The mighty ocean has but one taste, the taste of salt. Even so, the true way has but one savor, the savor of freedom.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Quote

...hmm... can't answer that... but I can offer the "winner" some cleavage shots from the yearend party... and the "real" story behind the name "Flyin'Chicken"... I know you'll truly enjoy... I did!



I'll expect a Pm from you shortly :)B|

Where is my fizzy-lifting drink?

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Quote

hmmm...
Chicken, this is attesting to be a very attractive thread.

~ You have popsjumper c**kblocking bill



FOUL...or should that be FOWL!
I'm innocent! You do me injustice!....Cockblocking Bill?
What? Not prone to cockblocking.
Please explain your reasoning.:P
My reality and yours are quite different.
I think we're all Bozos on this bus.
Falcon5232, SCS8170, SCSA353, POPS9398, DS239

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Quote

Applicants are requested to present face and full body shots



Ok, got the face shot, you'll have to ask Karri for the shots that make me LOOK like I HAVE cleavage. Full body shot attatched.

Quote

weight and measures



107lbs, 5'2", 34-26-36

Quote

age


That is not a polite question too ask a lady so I will decline to answere it.


Quote

education, vices, tattoos, piercings



I'm dumb I never finished highschool. Two tattoos, a unicorn on my chest, (as seen in shots at the beginning of thread), and Bullwinkle on my ass. I have my nose and my ears pierced too chicken to get anything else.

Quote

wing loading. number of jumps etc


You're a smart guy figure it out from my profile.

Quote

Reflex jumpers may not apply



My first rig was a REFLEX and I loved it! Geesh! No doggin my fave baby!

A five star hotel with all the amenities of home would be wonderful so when you get it set up give me a call!:P

Dammit don't have a pic small enough.

"Diligent observation leads to pure abstraction". Lari Pittman

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.
Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

0