-What's the worst thing you ever said to a cop??

[freefalle 0]

You are an asshole, a chicken fucker, you are a dirt dishonest piece of shit, you are no better than the criminals you arrest and I quit.

Now Im going to nursing school.

[happythoughts 0]

I was leaving my regular haunt one night and there was something in the road so I let the right side go onto the grass a little. I hit something and flattened a tire.

Here I am, dressed up, drunk, 3am - changing the tire.

Cop pulls up and gets out, "What are you doing?"
Me, "Stealing flat tires."
"Good luck asshole" and drives off.

[ACMESkydiver 0]

Quote

2 am here by the way

Whoa, wayyyy past Acme's bedtime.

~Jaye
Do not believe that possibly you can escape the reward of your action.

[dixieskydiver 0]

I once told the interim sherrif of my county that he wasn´t all that and a pack of crackers and that I thought I could take him. This then led to a spirited but short lived wrestling match on the floor of the huntin´club. We had both been drinking at my dad´s 50th birthday party

Dixie
HISPA #56 Facil Rodriguez
"Scientific research has shown that 60% of the time, it works every time."

[Deuce 1]

Well, kinda a different context, but it was, with my .45 in my hand' "Bernie, you ever do anything like that ever again I will kill you. You understand?" (nods)
A bad scene and an enemy for life.
Tough job.

[ACMESkydiver 0]

So we're good on this though, right?

~Jaye
Do not believe that possibly you can escape the reward of your action.

[happythoughts 0]

I just thought that this pic was interesting.

[ACMESkydiver 0]

Quote

I just thought that this pic was interesting.

Oh man, THAT takes some marbles!!!

~Jaye
Do not believe that possibly you can escape the reward of your action.

[cHoDaBoY 0]

We actually have a jumper at our local dropzone that is a highway cop. Well he kinda looks like Farva from super troopers. Mentioned it to a few other guy that had seen the movie and they agreed.

So naturally we had to have some fun with this

me: "hey Farva does this look like spit to you?"
someone else jumps in: "someone get this guy a litre cola, do we serve litre cola?"
another guy: "say car ramrod"

Q. Why do birds sing?
A. Because they dont have to pack when they land

[skylord 1]

This didn't happen to me (REALLY), but is an example of what being a bit impolite can lead to.

My friend (really!!) was at a party and his wife wanted to go home. He drove her home, and then drove back to the party. Problem was he had a bit too much to drink, and while driving back to the party was speeding through a construction zone. Out here in California that is a double fine, so the cops tend to hang around in those spots.

He sees the lights in the mirror, pulls over, and chugs tic tacs, plastic box and all. He opens his window about three inches. "Hello, Officer, how are you?" Everything is aok so far.

"Sir, I'm fine, it seems you were in a hurry back there, I need your license and registration please."

"Sure, here you are, and I'm sorry I didn't notice the signs."

"You have to be careful in these construction areas, it can be very dangerous."

After telling my friend (REALLY!!!) he was still going to ticket him, my buddy started letting his attorney, Mr. Al Cohol, speak for him.

The policeman asked some questions, and then asked my pal how old he was. Albert Cohol, Esq. answered:

"Hey, you got the license, do the math!"

That was an incorrect response item, and my good friend spent the next 18 hours in the Big House.

Bob

Bob Marks

"-when you leave the airplane its all wrong til it goes right, its a whole different mindset, this is why you have system redundancy." Mattaman

[dgm458 0]

I've got a couple for you guys:

#1 My then g/f (now wife), her kid (2 years old) and myself are in my blue pickup driving through the city at about 1 AM when we get pulled over by multiple cops, guns drawn. First cop walks slowly up to my window and says to the others, "He's not black; we got the wrong one." I told the cop "Didn't they teach you guys that that shit is illegal (referring to profiling)." Gets a shitty grin and his face and says some black guy just robbed a gas station and fled in a white pickup. I said, "You're either having one helluva fuckin night or that color blindness is starting to catch up." Another shitty grin and he splits.

#2 Got pulled over for doing 65 in a 55. I was pissed because at the time I didn't realize that they had lowered the speed limit to 55 for the stretch of road I was on. Cop comes to side of my truck and asks, "Do you have a paper tag?" I replied, "No, why did your mom forget to wipe your ass for you?" Come to find out my tag was expired so the dude impounded my truck for failure to pay taxes due to the state. Got it back two days and $600 later.

#3 Got pulled over in a construction zone doing 28 in a 35 (yes you read that correctly). I went slow on purpose because I knew that they patrolled that zone like crazy at that time of the night (I got off work at 2 AM). Comes up and asks if I'd been drinking. I told her, "No, but I would have downed a couple of I knew I'd be running into ugly women on my way home." Oops-crazy lady called for backup, held me at gunpoint until they got there (including a federal off-duty cop who was just passing by), made me participate in every type of field sobriety test imaginable, including reciting the alphabet backwards while standing on one leg with one arm extended. I got to go home an hour later.

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Failure to prepare is preparing to fail