GQ_jumper 4 #1 January 9, 2005 I wanna hear everyone's best "no shit there i was" stories. they can be about anything, but they have to start with no shit there i was.History does not long entrust the care of freedom to the weak or the timid. --Dwight D. Eisenhower Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Courteney 0 #2 January 9, 2005 No shit, there I was...I thought I was going...nah fuckit I thought I was dying or worse, Paralized!!! My first BASE jump off a 75m bridge...no as good as my girlfriend's who's was perfect. I er...fucked up a tad and went off head low....hard opening (obviously), swung me upside down, foot snags the right hand line set and I swing back into about 4 line twists...canopy was flying straight but now turned to those nasty rocks on the left side of the gorge. Forget for a few seconds that I'm NOT on a skydive and start swearing and kicking out...but those rocks are coming closer....so I grab the risers to flare but stall the canopy and plough backwards onto hard, wet sand flat out on my back, (no helmet), winding myself like you wouldn't believe, my head hurts like hell and I can't breathe...in agony looking up at my g/f and her friend looking down at me...shouting if I'm ok...can't speak...can only muster a shaky thumbs up. Feeling returned to my feet and I started breathing again. Had a mild concusion for a coupla days but walked away with only my pride bruised....drags me down like some sweet gravity!!! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
GQ_jumper 4 #3 January 9, 2005 Had a mild concusion for a coupla days but walked away with only my pride bruised. *** ouch!!! ok how bout stories that are a little less painful to read!!! glad to see you walked away from that oneHistory does not long entrust the care of freedom to the weak or the timid. --Dwight D. Eisenhower Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
popsjumper 2 #4 January 9, 2005 No shit, there I was...hiding in the closet with my clothes in my hand listening to her father bitch her out for skipping school....got away safely after he left the house an hour later...My reality and yours are quite different. I think we're all Bozos on this bus. Falcon5232, SCS8170, SCSA353, POPS9398, DS239 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
GQ_jumper 4 #5 January 9, 2005 I've got one of those stories, every man should have at least one like that... No shit there I was, asleep in bed in my barracks room with the girl I was dating, when in walks her husband, his commander, and my first sergeant. OOPS!! how did i miss that one?!?! lost half a months pay, 14 days restriction to the barracks 14 days of extra duty, and a letter of reprimand(which is no longer in my file).History does not long entrust the care of freedom to the weak or the timid. --Dwight D. Eisenhower Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
lightningbugirl 0 #6 January 9, 2005 Squatting in the woods to pee outside a DZ camp fire area when all of a sudden six police cars turned on their headlights behind me. They had been watching me the whole time because some neighbor had reported a loud party and they were checking it out. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
GQ_jumper 4 #7 January 9, 2005 Squatting in the woods to pee outside a DZ camp fire area when all of a sudden six police cars turned on their headlights behind me. They had been watching me the whole time because some neighbor had reported a loud party and they were checking it out. Quote ok but when they shined their lights on you did you flip them the bird and keep on peeing right in front of them just to spite them?!?!History does not long entrust the care of freedom to the weak or the timid. --Dwight D. Eisenhower Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites GQ_jumper 4 #8 January 9, 2005 and how convinient that they all replied to the loud party that was going on while you were peeing!!! coincidence or not??History does not long entrust the care of freedom to the weak or the timid. --Dwight D. Eisenhower Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites bodypilot90 0 #9 January 9, 2005 QuoteNo shit there I was, asleep in bed in my barracks room with the girl I was dating, when in walks her husband, his commander, and my first sergeant. OOPS!! how did i miss that one?!?! lost half a months pay, 14 days restriction to the barracks 14 days of extra duty, and a letter of reprimand(which is no longer in my file). was it worth it? Bet Top was pisses off eh? edit to add did you salute when the CO came in Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites GQ_jumper 4 #10 January 10, 2005 did you salute when the CO came in *** yeah i was saluting, just not with my hands girls like that are why i no longer date hooters waitressesHistory does not long entrust the care of freedom to the weak or the timid. --Dwight D. Eisenhower Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites bseriesboosted 0 #11 January 10, 2005 Quotedid you salute when the CO came in *** yeah i was saluting, just not with my hands girls like that are why i no longer date hooters waitresses pricelessPruitt Skydive The Farm Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites Brigitte36 0 #12 January 10, 2005 On a date with my boyfriend when his wife came over and said, "I am so glad to finally meet you! Family is so important to my husband, he talks about how special you are all the time! I wish some of my cousins lived nearby!" (No, he wasn't my cousin, no he never had told me he was married and told me he was single btw.) I can pick them all right!! I do it every time! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites RkyMtnHigh 0 #13 January 10, 2005 QuoteOn a date with my boyfriend when his wife came over and said, "I am so glad to finally meet you! Family is so important to my husband, he talks about how special you are all the time! I wish some of my cousins lived nearby!" (No, he wasn't my cousin, no he never had told me he was married and told me he was single btw.) I can pick them all right!! I do it every time! whoa...he must have been very convincing to avoid telling you all that. Hope you cutaway right away. _________________________________________ Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites Brigitte36 0 #14 January 10, 2005 I sure as hell cutaway. I also told his wife! I also threw my cocktail into his lap. Petty? Yes. Satisfying? YES. Unfortunately, he was a well-known man in the community and I ended up moving out of the area. People thought I instigated the relationship. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites flyangel2 2 #15 January 10, 2005 No shit there I was, thought I was going to die, when my reserve malfunctioned. Edit cause I can't spellMay your trails be crooked, winding, lonesome, dangerous, leading to the most amazing view. May your mountains rise into and above the clouds. - Edward Abbey Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites Brigitte36 0 #16 January 10, 2005 Now that is a real reason to say "Oh shit!" Glad you are still around. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites flyangel2 2 #17 January 10, 2005 Yea, I was being a big baby after I landed, all whinning and crying. But my JMs didn't care, they slapped another rig on me and made me make another jump right then and there. That was the best thing they could have done to me.May your trails be crooked, winding, lonesome, dangerous, leading to the most amazing view. May your mountains rise into and above the clouds. - Edward Abbey Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites freeflir29 0 #18 January 10, 2005 Quote Yea, I was being a big baby after I landed, all whinning and crying. Geez....girls........ Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites bigway 4 #19 January 10, 2005 no shit, there i was, second night in london from New zealand, pub was closing and got invited back to this chicks house for some more drink....no more than 2 minutes after i entered the house did the the door get kicked down....around 15 police come charging through the house in full riot gear armed with cameras. I thought, well i did not know what to think when i heard the door being kicked in and people out of knowhere started running around everywhere. So the cop informs me i am inside a drug house that they have been watching. The cop later asks me what happened to my pants as they were soaking. i said to him that i must of spilled my glass of water but then remember i never had a glass of water. The cops let me leave after long interogation in to who i am....so i walk out the door to be welcomed by about 10 more police with, a couple more with cameras, and they ask me to say my name into the camera while i have this massive wet spot down my pants. I watch cop reality shows in this country all the time, just waiting to be more ashamed. On the way home to the backpackers i am staying at, i get jumped at the cash machine for 180 pounds. I left london the next day. .Karnage Krew Gear Store . Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites ahegeman 0 #20 January 10, 2005 Dude, that sucks hard.--------------------------------------------------------------- There is a fine line between 'hobby' and 'mental illness'. --Dave Barry Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites freeflir29 0 #21 January 10, 2005 I got a decent one from my days in the Air Force. No shit there I was.....standing in an OPEN field. Wearing a kevlar helmet, flak vest (No high speed body armor like they have now), web gear, and a ruck with ~30lbs of radio and batteries. I hear an urgent voice behind me yelling "RUN!!!!!!" I look back to see the artillery FO already 10 steps or more away and running like hell. I didn't ask questions.....I started running. It's uphill of course.....and 300+ meters to a "safe area." There were 5 of us out there. The guy controlling the planes is trying to yell into the mike to get them out of there. Long story short.......the arty fired a little early....and the planes were screwing around longer than they should have been. I'm in an open field about 300 meters from exploding 81MM mortars and 105 arty rounds. I can hear the shrapnel cracking by. Amazingly.......no one got hurt. Sure scared me though. The Army can be VERY dangerous to be around. I mean.......this was in "peacetime" on a range!!!! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites flyangel2 2 #22 January 10, 2005 QuoteI got a decent one from my days in the Air Force. I knew there was a reason I liked you.May your trails be crooked, winding, lonesome, dangerous, leading to the most amazing view. May your mountains rise into and above the clouds. - Edward Abbey Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites freeflir29 0 #23 January 10, 2005 QuoteI knew there was a reason I liked you. Here I thought it was my stellar charm and good looks. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites GQ_jumper 4 #24 January 10, 2005 I'm in an open field about 300 meters from exploding 81MM mortars and 105 arty rounds. I can hear the shrapnel cracking by.*** yeah who hasn't seen that one played out at least once or twice jk glad to here your ok, doesn't say much for the artillery though!!History does not long entrust the care of freedom to the weak or the timid. --Dwight D. Eisenhower Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites GQ_jumper 4 #25 January 10, 2005 QuoteOn a date with my boyfriend when his wife came over and said, "I am so glad to finally meet you! Family is so important to my husband, he talks about how special you are all the time! I wish some of my cousins lived nearby!" (No, he wasn't my cousin, no he never had told me he was married and told me he was single btw.) I can pick them all right!! I do it every time!*** you forgot to say no shit there i was....every self respecting single person in this country has to have something like that happen at least once, or more than once in my case!! no shit there i was dropping off a girl i had picked up at the bar. she's giving me directions to her house when suddenly i realize i just drove onto fort benning. i knew she wasn't in the military so that could only mean one thing if she lived on post. she was married to someone that was. she made up some BS excuse i can't remember for why i had to drop her off a block away from her house. and as she climbed out of the car at 5am i noticed an angry looking man standing about a block away. i got back to the barracks with just enough time to get changed and make it to first formation, and as i was walking out the door my phone rigns, i answer and there is an angry man on the other end asking why there is a phone number for a guy named dan in his wifes pocket. my name was richard for the rest of the week.History does not long entrust the care of freedom to the weak or the timid. --Dwight D. Eisenhower Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites Prev 1 2 Next Page 1 of 2 Join the conversation You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account. Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible. Reply to this topic... × Pasted as rich text. Paste as plain text instead Only 75 emoji are allowed. × Your link has been automatically embedded. Display as a link instead × Your previous content has been restored. Clear editor × You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL. Insert image from URL × Desktop Tablet Phone Submit Reply 0
GQ_jumper 4 #8 January 9, 2005 and how convinient that they all replied to the loud party that was going on while you were peeing!!! coincidence or not??History does not long entrust the care of freedom to the weak or the timid. --Dwight D. Eisenhower Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
bodypilot90 0 #9 January 9, 2005 QuoteNo shit there I was, asleep in bed in my barracks room with the girl I was dating, when in walks her husband, his commander, and my first sergeant. OOPS!! how did i miss that one?!?! lost half a months pay, 14 days restriction to the barracks 14 days of extra duty, and a letter of reprimand(which is no longer in my file). was it worth it? Bet Top was pisses off eh? edit to add did you salute when the CO came in Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
GQ_jumper 4 #10 January 10, 2005 did you salute when the CO came in *** yeah i was saluting, just not with my hands girls like that are why i no longer date hooters waitressesHistory does not long entrust the care of freedom to the weak or the timid. --Dwight D. Eisenhower Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
bseriesboosted 0 #11 January 10, 2005 Quotedid you salute when the CO came in *** yeah i was saluting, just not with my hands girls like that are why i no longer date hooters waitresses pricelessPruitt Skydive The Farm Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Brigitte36 0 #12 January 10, 2005 On a date with my boyfriend when his wife came over and said, "I am so glad to finally meet you! Family is so important to my husband, he talks about how special you are all the time! I wish some of my cousins lived nearby!" (No, he wasn't my cousin, no he never had told me he was married and told me he was single btw.) I can pick them all right!! I do it every time! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
RkyMtnHigh 0 #13 January 10, 2005 QuoteOn a date with my boyfriend when his wife came over and said, "I am so glad to finally meet you! Family is so important to my husband, he talks about how special you are all the time! I wish some of my cousins lived nearby!" (No, he wasn't my cousin, no he never had told me he was married and told me he was single btw.) I can pick them all right!! I do it every time! whoa...he must have been very convincing to avoid telling you all that. Hope you cutaway right away. _________________________________________ Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Brigitte36 0 #14 January 10, 2005 I sure as hell cutaway. I also told his wife! I also threw my cocktail into his lap. Petty? Yes. Satisfying? YES. Unfortunately, he was a well-known man in the community and I ended up moving out of the area. People thought I instigated the relationship. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
flyangel2 2 #15 January 10, 2005 No shit there I was, thought I was going to die, when my reserve malfunctioned. Edit cause I can't spellMay your trails be crooked, winding, lonesome, dangerous, leading to the most amazing view. May your mountains rise into and above the clouds. - Edward Abbey Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Brigitte36 0 #16 January 10, 2005 Now that is a real reason to say "Oh shit!" Glad you are still around. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
flyangel2 2 #17 January 10, 2005 Yea, I was being a big baby after I landed, all whinning and crying. But my JMs didn't care, they slapped another rig on me and made me make another jump right then and there. That was the best thing they could have done to me.May your trails be crooked, winding, lonesome, dangerous, leading to the most amazing view. May your mountains rise into and above the clouds. - Edward Abbey Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
freeflir29 0 #18 January 10, 2005 Quote Yea, I was being a big baby after I landed, all whinning and crying. Geez....girls........ Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
bigway 4 #19 January 10, 2005 no shit, there i was, second night in london from New zealand, pub was closing and got invited back to this chicks house for some more drink....no more than 2 minutes after i entered the house did the the door get kicked down....around 15 police come charging through the house in full riot gear armed with cameras. I thought, well i did not know what to think when i heard the door being kicked in and people out of knowhere started running around everywhere. So the cop informs me i am inside a drug house that they have been watching. The cop later asks me what happened to my pants as they were soaking. i said to him that i must of spilled my glass of water but then remember i never had a glass of water. The cops let me leave after long interogation in to who i am....so i walk out the door to be welcomed by about 10 more police with, a couple more with cameras, and they ask me to say my name into the camera while i have this massive wet spot down my pants. I watch cop reality shows in this country all the time, just waiting to be more ashamed. On the way home to the backpackers i am staying at, i get jumped at the cash machine for 180 pounds. I left london the next day. .Karnage Krew Gear Store . Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
ahegeman 0 #20 January 10, 2005 Dude, that sucks hard.--------------------------------------------------------------- There is a fine line between 'hobby' and 'mental illness'. --Dave Barry Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
freeflir29 0 #21 January 10, 2005 I got a decent one from my days in the Air Force. No shit there I was.....standing in an OPEN field. Wearing a kevlar helmet, flak vest (No high speed body armor like they have now), web gear, and a ruck with ~30lbs of radio and batteries. I hear an urgent voice behind me yelling "RUN!!!!!!" I look back to see the artillery FO already 10 steps or more away and running like hell. I didn't ask questions.....I started running. It's uphill of course.....and 300+ meters to a "safe area." There were 5 of us out there. The guy controlling the planes is trying to yell into the mike to get them out of there. Long story short.......the arty fired a little early....and the planes were screwing around longer than they should have been. I'm in an open field about 300 meters from exploding 81MM mortars and 105 arty rounds. I can hear the shrapnel cracking by. Amazingly.......no one got hurt. Sure scared me though. The Army can be VERY dangerous to be around. I mean.......this was in "peacetime" on a range!!!! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
flyangel2 2 #22 January 10, 2005 QuoteI got a decent one from my days in the Air Force. I knew there was a reason I liked you.May your trails be crooked, winding, lonesome, dangerous, leading to the most amazing view. May your mountains rise into and above the clouds. - Edward Abbey Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
freeflir29 0 #23 January 10, 2005 QuoteI knew there was a reason I liked you. Here I thought it was my stellar charm and good looks. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
GQ_jumper 4 #24 January 10, 2005 I'm in an open field about 300 meters from exploding 81MM mortars and 105 arty rounds. I can hear the shrapnel cracking by.*** yeah who hasn't seen that one played out at least once or twice jk glad to here your ok, doesn't say much for the artillery though!!History does not long entrust the care of freedom to the weak or the timid. --Dwight D. Eisenhower Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
GQ_jumper 4 #25 January 10, 2005 QuoteOn a date with my boyfriend when his wife came over and said, "I am so glad to finally meet you! Family is so important to my husband, he talks about how special you are all the time! I wish some of my cousins lived nearby!" (No, he wasn't my cousin, no he never had told me he was married and told me he was single btw.) I can pick them all right!! I do it every time!*** you forgot to say no shit there i was....every self respecting single person in this country has to have something like that happen at least once, or more than once in my case!! no shit there i was dropping off a girl i had picked up at the bar. she's giving me directions to her house when suddenly i realize i just drove onto fort benning. i knew she wasn't in the military so that could only mean one thing if she lived on post. she was married to someone that was. she made up some BS excuse i can't remember for why i had to drop her off a block away from her house. and as she climbed out of the car at 5am i noticed an angry looking man standing about a block away. i got back to the barracks with just enough time to get changed and make it to first formation, and as i was walking out the door my phone rigns, i answer and there is an angry man on the other end asking why there is a phone number for a guy named dan in his wifes pocket. my name was richard for the rest of the week.History does not long entrust the care of freedom to the weak or the timid. --Dwight D. Eisenhower Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
