How big of an IDIOT are you?

[Slappie 9]

1. Do they have a 4th of July in England?
2. How many birthdays does the average man have?
3. Some months have 31 days; how many have 28?
4. A woman gives a beggar 50 cents; the woman is the beggar's sister, but the beggar is not the woman's brother. How come?
5. Why can't a man living in the USA be buried in Canada?
6. How many outs are there in an inning?
7. Is it legal for a man in California to marry his widow's sister? Why?
8. Two men play five games of checkers. Each man wins the same number of games. There are no ties. Explain this.
9. Divide 30 by 1/2 and add 10. What is the answer?
10. A man builds a house rectangular in shape. All sides have southern exposure. A big bear walks by, what color is the bear? Why?
11. If there are 3 apples and you take away 2, how many do you have?
12. I have two U.S. coins totaling 55 cents. One is not a nickel. What are the coins?
13. If you have only one match and you walked into a room where there was an oil burner, a kerosene lamp, and a wood burning stove, which one would you light first?
14. How far can a dog run into the woods?
15. A doctor gives you three pills telling you to take one every half hour. How long would the pills last?
16. A farmer has 17 sheep, and all but 9 die. How many are left?
17. How many animals of each sex did Moses take on the ark?
18. A clerk in the butcher shop is 5' 10" tall. What does he weigh?
19. How many two cent stamps are there in a dozen?
20. What was the President's name in 1950?


Answers to follow.. Please post the question number and your answer.

"Find out just what any people will quietly submit to and you have found out the exact measure of injustice and wrong which will be imposed upon them."

[jtval 0]

too easy

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[Phillbo 11]

1. no
2. 1
3. 1
4. it's her sista
5. he aint dead
6. 6
7. he be dead
8. different games
9. 70
10. white ... the house is at the pole
11. 2
12. I forget this one ...
13. the match


too lazy to go on ..

[DaGimp 0]

dont know if i should do this but......

Quote

1. Do they have a 4th of July in England?
no
2. How many birthdays does the average man have?
1
3. Some months have 31 days; how many have 28?
1, leap year?
4. A woman gives a beggar 50 cents; the woman is the beggar's sister, but the beggar is not the woman's brother. How come?
cause shes a woman
5. Why can't a man living in the USA be buried in Canada?
cause hes living
6. How many outs are there in an inning?
6
7. Is it legal for a man in California to marry his widow's sister? Why?
dunno
8. Two men play five games of checkers. Each man wins the same number of games. There are no ties. Explain this.
2 men...five games each...dosent mean they played eachother...they both won five games against someone else.
9. Divide 30 by 1/2 and add 10. What is the answer?
25
10. A man builds a house rectangular in shape. All sides have southern exposure. A big bear walks by, what color is the bear? Why?
white.....north pole
11. If there are 3 apples and you take away 2, how many do you have?
2
12. I have two U.S. coins totaling 55 cents. One is not a nickel. What are the coins?
quater and a nickel
13. If you have only one match and you walked into a room where there was an oil burner, a kerosene lamp, and a wood burning stove, which one would you light first?
14. How far can a dog run into the woods?
one step
15. A doctor gives you three pills telling you to take one every half hour. How long would the pills last?
an hour
16. A farmer has 17 sheep, and all but 9 die. How many are left?
9
17. How many animals of each sex did Moses take on the ark?
2
18. A clerk in the butcher shop is 5' 10" tall. What does he weigh?
?
19. How many two cent stamps are there in a dozen?
12
20. What was the President's name in 1950?
?

Answers to follow.. Please post the question number and your answer.

"Professor of Pimpology"~~~Bolas

[wildblue 7]

yes
1
all of them
sister
can't bury people alive
6
no, he's dead
they weren't playing each other
70
white - north pole
2
a nickel & 50-cent piece
the match
1/2 way
1 hour
9
none
meat
12
president of what?

it's like incest - you're substituting convenience for quality

[jtval 0]

Quote

1. no
2. 1
3. 1
4. it's her sista
5. he aint dead
6. 6
7. he be dead
8. different games
9. 70
10. white ... the house is at the pole
11. 2
12. I forget this one ... the other one is a nickel
13. the match


too lazy to go on ..

My photos

My Videos

[Phillbo 11]

18. Meat

[piisfish 140]

Quote

1.yes
2. 1
3. 1
4. the beggar is her sister too
5. cause he's alive
6. ?? not that kind of sport here
7. No cause he's dead
8. 1 game not finished yet
9. 70
10. white, it's a polar bear (from north pole)
11. 2
12. 1 50ct, 1 5 ct
13. the match
14. depends of the lenght of the leash
15. 1h
16. 17, 9 alive, 8 dead
17. Did moses have an ark too ??
18. meat
19. 12
20. Mister President

scissors beat paper, paper beat rock, rock beat wingsuit - KarlM

[lawrocket 3]

Okay - I'll bite...
***
1. Do they have a 4th of July in England?
Yep. Every year/

2. How many birthdays does the average man have?
1. When he's born.

3. Some months have 31 days; how many have 28?
All of them

4. A woman gives a beggar 50 cents; the woman is the beggar's sister, but the beggar is not the woman's brother. How come?
She's a nun at church, or the brother disowned "her" after a sex change.

5. Why can't a man living in the USA be buried in Canada?
Because he's still alive and in the USA. Now, you can bury a man alive in Canada if he's there. And you can hold prisoners in Cuba (USA) or USA (Cuba). Now I'm confused. Is it USA or CUba? Who cares. No rights.

6. How many outs are there in an inning?
Strike out, fly out, ground out, three out, outfield, dugout - lots.

7. Is it legal for a man in California to marry his widow's sister? Why?
No. Under Cal. Family Code section 300, "Marriage is a personal relation arising out of a civil contract between a man and a woman, to which the consent of the parties capable of making that contract is necessary." The man lacks capability to consent and contract.

8. Two men play five games of checkers. Each man wins the same number of games. There are no ties. Explain this.
They're on the same team.

9. Divide 30 by 1/2 and add 10. What is the answer?
70.

10. A man builds a house rectangular in shape. All sides have southern exposure. A big bear walks by, what color is the bear? Why?
White. The house is on the north Pole. (unless it's a Chicago Bear, or Berkeley Bear, or something like that)

11. If there are 3 apples and you take away 2, how many do you have?
I've got two.

12. I have two U.S. coins totaling 55 cents. One is not a nickel. What are the coins?
A 50 cent piece and a nickel.

13. If you have only one match and you walked into a room where there was an oil burner, a kerosene lamp, and a wood burning stove, which one would you light first?
The match.

14. How far can a dog run into the woods?
Till he gets into the woods.

15. A doctor gives you three pills telling you to take one every half hour. How long would the pills last?
Who knows? Some might say an hour and a half, but that fais to take into consideration pharacological issues. Also, it assumes the person follows doctor's orders, and this is a skydiving forum, so that would never happen.

16. A farmer has 17 sheep, and all but 9 die. How many are left?
17. Clay's only got 9 good ones to choose from.

17. How many animals of each sex did Moses take on the ark?
1

18. A clerk in the butcher shop is 5' 10" tall. What does he weigh?
Meat.

19. How many two cent stamps are there in a dozen?
12.

20. What was the President's name in 1950?
George W. Bush.

My wife is hotter than your wife.

[gjhdiver 0]

Quote

1. Do they have a 4th of July in England?
2. How many birthdays does the average man have?
3. Some months have 31 days; how many have 28?
4. A woman gives a beggar 50 cents; the woman is the beggar's sister, but the beggar is not the woman's brother. How come?
5. Why can't a man living in the USA be buried in Canada?
6. How many outs are there in an inning?
7. Is it legal for a man in California to marry his widow's sister? Why?
8. Two men play five games of checkers. Each man wins the same number of games. There are no ties. Explain this.
9. Divide 30 by 1/2 and add 10. What is the answer?
10. A man builds a house rectangular in shape. All sides have southern exposure. A big bear walks by, what color is the bear? Why?
11. If there are 3 apples and you take away 2, how many do you have?
12. I have two U.S. coins totaling 55 cents. One is not a nickel. What are the coins?
13. If you have only one match and you walked into a room where there was an oil burner, a kerosene lamp, and a wood burning stove, which one would you light first?
14. How far can a dog run into the woods?
15. A doctor gives you three pills telling you to take one every half hour. How long would the pills last?
16. A farmer has 17 sheep, and all but 9 die. How many are left?
17. How many animals of each sex did Moses take on the ark?
18. A clerk in the butcher shop is 5' 10" tall. What does he weigh?
19. How many two cent stamps are there in a dozen?
20. What was the President's name in 1950?


Answers to follow.. Please post the question number and your answer.

1. Yes.
2. One
3. All of them
4. It's her sister
5. He's still alive
6. Six
7. No, he's still alive
8. They are not playing each other
9. 70
10. White. He's at the North Pole
11. Two
12. Half dollar and a nickel
13. The match
14. Halfway
15. One hour
16. 9
17.None, because he's not Noah
18. Meat
19. 12
20. Bush

And no I didn't cheat, and I didn't look at anyone else's answers first, because it wouldn't be fun otherwise.

How did I do ?

[Slappie 9]

Answers:
1. Yes
2. One
3. All of them (12)
4. The beggar is her sister.
5. He can't be buried if he isn't dead.
6. 6
7. No - because he is dead.
8. They aren't playing each other.
9. 70
10. White. The house is at the North Pole so it is a polar bear.
11. 2
12. 50 cent piece and a nickel. (The other one is a nickel)
13. The match.
14. Half way. Then he is running out of the woods.
15. 1 Hour
16. 9
17. None - Noah took them on the ark.
18. Meat
19. 12
20. George W. Bush - Same as it is today...

Answers to Test and Scoring guide:

* 20 Correct - Genius
* 17 Correct - Above Normal
* 15 Correct - Normal
* 8 Correct - Not the brightest crayon in the box
* 6 Correct - Not quite an idiot...definitely not an Einstein
* 3 Correct - Big Idiot

"Find out just what any people will quietly submit to and you have found out the exact measure of injustice and wrong which will be imposed upon them."

[happythoughts 0]

The Presidents name in 1950 was George Bush. He was younger then, but his name was still George.

[bvsdjumper 0]

1. Yes. but it's not a holiday
2. Only born once
3. All of them
4. Both are sisters
5. He could be buried alive
6. 6?
7. Californians are weird, they'd probably let her marry a dead guy
8. Not playing each other
9. 70
10. White polar bear near the north pole
11. 2
12. the other is so 5 cent and 50 cent
13. the match
14. As long as the leash
15. 1 hour
16. 9
17. None it was Noah
18. Meat
19. a dozen
20. same as it is now


how'd I do?
--Art

Sky-div'ing (ski'div'ing) n. A modern sport that involves parties, bragging, sexual excesses, the imbibing of large quantities of beer, and, on rare occasions, parachuting from aircraft.

[mouth 0]

1. no
2. 1
3. 12
4. she's her sister
5. cause he is LIVING
6. 3
7. no...although maybe it is now...I can't keep up with what is legal in the gay and lesbian world anymore
8. they aren't playing each other
9. 25
10. white, but who cares...I ran away
11. 2
12. a 50cent and a nickel..the other one is the nickel
13.match
14.a step
15. an hour if you take one now, but an hour and a half if you wait 30 minutes to take the first one
16. 9
17. 1 of each sex
18. meat
19. 12
20. Mr. President

--
Hot Mama
At least you know where you stand even if it is in a pile of shit.

[livendive 8]

1. Do they have a 4th of July in England?
Yes
2. How many birthdays does the average man have?
1
3. Some months have 31 days; how many have 28?
12
4. A woman gives a beggar 50 cents; the woman is the beggar's sister, but the beggar is not the woman's brother. How come?
The beggar is the woman's sister
5. Why can't a man living in the USA be buried in Canada?
Because he's still living
6. How many outs are there in an inning?
6
7. Is it legal for a man in California to marry his widow's sister? Why?
No, because he's dead
8. Two men play five games of checkers. Each man wins the same number of games. There are no ties. Explain this.
They were not playing against each other
9. Divide 30 by 1/2 and add 10. What is the answer?
70
10. A man builds a house rectangular in shape. All sides have southern exposure. A big bear walks by, what color is the bear? Why?
White, because he built at the north pole.
11. If there are 3 apples and you take away 2, how many do you have?
2
12. I have two U.S. coins totaling 55 cents. One is not a nickel. What are the coins?
a nickel and a fifty cent piece
13. If you have only one match and you walked into a room where there was an oil burner, a kerosene lamp, and a wood burning stove, which one would you light first?
The match.
14. How far can a dog run into the woods?
Halfway
15. A doctor gives you three pills telling you to take one every half hour. How long would the pills last?
1 hour
16. A farmer has 17 sheep, and all but 9 die. How many are left?
9
17. How many animals of each sex did Moses take on the ark?
None. He was too busy getting the 10 commandments.
18. A clerk in the butcher shop is 5' 10" tall. What does he weigh?
meat
19. How many two cent stamps are there in a dozen?
12
20. What was the President's name in 1950?
George Walker Bush

"I AM A PROFESSIONAL EXTREME ATHLETE!"
(drink Mountain Dew)

[mcrocker 0]

1. Do they have a 4th of July in England?
-Yes, it isn't a holiday but it is on the calendar

2. How many birthdays does the average man have?
-One, the day he is born, everything else is a celebration of his birthday, not his actual birthday.

3. Some months have 31 days; how many have 28?
- 6 and all of the months have 28 days, some have more but they all have at least 28

4. A woman gives a beggar 50 cents; the woman is the beggar's sister, but the beggar is not the woman's brother. How come?
- The beggar is a woman and her sister.

5. Why can't a man living in the USA be buried in Canada?
- He is still alive

6. How many outs are there in an inning?
- 6 outs, 3 per side

7. Is it legal for a man in California to marry his widow's sister? Why?
- No, if he has a widow he is already dead, can't marry while dead.

8. Two men play five games of checkers. Each man wins the same number of games. There are no ties. Explain this.

- They aren't playing against each other

9. Divide 30 by 1/2 and add 10. What is the answer?

- 70. 30 / 1 / 2 + 10 = 3 * 2 + 10 = 70

10. A man builds a house rectangular in shape. All sides have southern exposure. A big bear walks by, what color is the bear? Why?

-- Uh, no idea

11. If there are 3 apples and you take away 2, how many do you have?
- 2

12. I have two U.S. coins totaling 55 cents. One is not a nickel. What are the coins?
-- .50 + .05. One isn't a nickel but the other one is...

13. If you have only one match and you walked into a room where there was an oil burner, a kerosene lamp, and a wood burning stove, which one would you light first?
-- Uh...


14. How far can a dog run into the woods?
15. A doctor gives you three pills telling you to take one every half hour. How long would the pills last?

- 1 hour, 1 when you get them, 1 30 minutes later, 1 30 minutes later, total of 1 hour

16. A farmer has 17 sheep, and all but 9 die. How many are left?
- 9

17. How many animals of each sex did Moses take on the ark?
1 of each sex

18. A clerk in the butcher shop is 5' 10" tall. What does he weigh?
- meat

19. How many two cent stamps are there in a dozen?
- 12

20. What was the President's name in 1950?

Truman? ??

[newsstand 0]

5) It may not be socially acceptable but you could bury a live person in Canada.

"Truth is tough. It will not break, like a bubble, at a touch; nay, you may kick it about all day like a football, and it will be round and full at evening."
-- Oliver Wendell Holmes

[wildblue 7]

Damn I'm smart.

it's like incest - you're substituting convenience for quality

[Slappie 9]

Dayum to many of you peeps have seen these questions before. I missed 2 my first time.

"Find out just what any people will quietly submit to and you have found out the exact measure of injustice and wrong which will be imposed upon them."

[lawrocket 3]

Quote

5) It may not be socially acceptable but you could bury a live person in Canada.

Not if he's in the USA, as the question stated.

My wife is hotter than your wife.

[mouth 0]

I'm thinking I'm an idiot.....for answering this thing.

--
Hot Mama
At least you know where you stand even if it is in a pile of shit.

[Misslmperfect 0]

Quote

1. no
2. 1
3. all
4. the begger is a woman
5. he's not dead
6. 6
7. he's dead
8. 10 games..not playing each other
9. 70
10. ummmm
11. 2
12. one isnt a nickel, but 1 is..a quarter and a nickel
13. stove?
14. until he's into the woods? umm?
15. 1hour
16. hehehe 9
17. 1 of each sex?
18. the meat..?
19. 12
20. truman

Oh Canada, merci pour la livraison!

• Quote

[wildblue 7]

Quote

Quote

5) It may not be socially acceptable but you could bury a live person in Canada.

Not if he's in the USA, as the question stated.

He could be living in the US, but travelling through Canada

it's like incest - you're substituting convenience for quality

[Misslmperfect 0]

10. A man builds a house rectangular in shape. All sides have southern exposure. A big bear walks by, what color is the bear? Why?
White, because he built at the north pole.


oohhhhhhh
DUH!

Oh Canada, merci pour la livraison!

[airdweller 0]

1. yes the day after the third
2. You are only born once so 1, unless you count reincarnation
3. all months have at least 28 days, some even have more!
4. because the beggar is the girls sister.
5. because a living man is not dead, and they usually only bury dead people in Canada.
6. same number as the question number, at least for baseball.
7.I don't think even in CA, that a dead man can get married.
8.there aponant is not the other man, but someone else.
9.30/.5=60+10=70.
10. White, the color of bears are in the north pole.
11. Two, unless I started with the three apples to begin with, then I would still have three.
12. a fifty cent piece is the coin that is not the nickel, The other coin is a nickel.
13. I would light the match to get the other things lit.
14. half way if he wants to get back.
15. if the doctor says 1 ever half hour I would assume they last only 30 minutes.
16.if all but 9 die then there are only 9 left.
17. according to the Bible, I think it was only one of each sex.
18. If he is in a butcher shop I would imagine he weighs meat.
19. 12 2 cent stamps unless it's a bakers dozen, then it would be 13 stamps.
20. I think he still had the same name as he does today, George W. Bush

So Yes I must be an idiot to answer all these questions

------------------------------------------------------
"From the mightiest pharaoh to the lowliest peasant,
who doesn't enjoy a good sit?" C. Montgomery Burns