seekfun 0 #1 May 26, 2004 The other day, I got caught checking out some guy's girlfriend. He caught me red handed. Then, he gave me a stare as if he was wishing me a fate worse than death. It was a terrifying stare. Then, 30 seconds later, I watch him and his girlfriend leave the parking lot we were standing in, and he didn't even open up the car door for her. How can he stare me down like that and then not even open the door for her? I sensed a contradiction in his behavior, and it's got me observing. What are your thoughts? topher "...there is a there out there..." - Tom Robbins Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
ACMESkydiver 0 #2 May 26, 2004 In 10 years of marriage I could probably count on one hand the number of times my husband didn't open my door for me...and yeah, all the girls are jealous. I've got a modern-day knight in shining armor. Now then on a plane, I'm pretty much on my own after yelling 'DOOR!!!' ~Jaye Do not believe that possibly you can escape the reward of your action. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Thanatos340 1 #3 May 26, 2004 Last time a similar discussion on this topic came up here, I was shocked to find out that there are several people who are actually offended by Chivalrous Gestures. However in this case, I fail to see the correlation between "checking out some guy's girlfriend" and Him being Chivalrous. No connection at all. I would not expect some one who actually got upset by someone else looking at his girlfriend to be the type who would open doors for ladies. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Dougiefresh 0 #4 May 26, 2004 Quotethere are several people who are actually offended by Chivalrous Gestures. Yeah, I dated one of them. First time I opened a door for her and she got pissed, I ended it. There's a fine line between being a self-confident and self-reliant woman and being a straight up beeotch. She crossed it. Her loss.Human beings, who are almost unique in having the ability to learn from the experience of others, are also remarkable for their apparent disinclination to do so. --Douglas Adams Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
seekfun 0 #5 May 26, 2004 Thanatos340, I wasn't really trying to make a connection between his disapproval of my glance and his chivalry. I wouldn't expect a significant correlation there. I guess I was trying to say, "if he's not going to respect the young lady, what right does he have to get upset about someone else noticing her?" You're probably right about: Quote I would not expect some one who actually got upset by someone else looking at his girlfriend to be the type who would open doors for ladies. TTFN, topher "...there is a there out there..." - Tom Robbins Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Keith 0 #6 May 26, 2004 QuoteI was shocked to find out that there are several people who are actually offended by Chivalrous Gestures. Yep. I no longer open a door for a woman unless I know her. I've been yelled at on more than one occasion because "I was being condescending." I open the door for men all the time though and have never been yelled at. Go figure Keith Don't Fuck with me Keith - J. Mandeville Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
lawrocket 3 #7 May 26, 2004 I am thinking, "vallerina! Wherefore art thou, Vallerina?!" My wife is hotter than your wife. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
weegegirl 2 #8 May 26, 2004 chivalry? pbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbt! doing nice things for each other just cuz? oh, yeah, baby! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
sunshine 2 #9 May 26, 2004 Quotedoing nice things for each other just cuz? oh, yeah, baby! Yup. ___________________________________________ meow I get a Mike hug! I get a Mike hug! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Taylor610 0 #10 May 26, 2004 Chivalry is alive and well, and is nothing more that a Gentlemanly show of respect! I think we call it good manners. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
skyyhi 0 #11 May 26, 2004 Chivalry is not dead yet but it is dying. I love it when a man will open a door for me, but I certainly am not going to hold it against him if he doesn't. Many people in this day and age are not brought up knowing that this is the way to treat people. Now one thing that does piss me off is when I am on a jump plane and a small petite girl is sitting by the door, and 4 or so big guys are sitting there with her. The light comes on to open the door and she starts in but is clearly struggling to get it open. . .do ya think even ONE of those guys could help her? No. . .I crawled over them to assist. . .stupid guys. I wanted to slap all of them. . .________________________________________ Take risks not to escape life… but to prevent life from escaping. ~ A bumper sticker at the DZ FGF #6 Darcy Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Dagny 0 #12 May 26, 2004 QuoteThe light comes on to open the door and she starts in but is clearly struggling to get it open. . .do ya think even ONE of those guys could help her? No. . .I crawled over them to assist. . .stupid guys. I wanted to slap all of them. . . Idiots. You would think they wouldn't need the door open to jump. Who wants to sit on the crowded plane watching someone struggle with the door as you blow over your spot? Silly. As for chivalry, I like it. I think it's respectful and sweet. Hmmmm, but then again.....when your man opens the car door for you is it to be nice? Or is it because he really wants to ensure you aren't going to be driving? Gotta wonder. Take me, I am the drug; take me, I am hallucinogenic. -Salvador Dali Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
VanillaSkyGirl 6 #13 May 26, 2004 To me, being chivalrous is also being respectful and a gentleman. I do not find this degrading or condescending at all. As a matter of fact, I really, really appreciate when a man (whether it be my boyfriend or just a male friend or acquaintance) opens car doors, pulls out seats, helps to carry my HUGE bags, walks me to my car, etc. , etc. I don't expect to be treated this way, but I seem to be lucky enough to usually be treated in such a kind and respectful manner as this. I definitely notice this behavior and am truly grateful. Small gesture from women towards men are also beautiful. I try to do similar polite things for my female and my male friends because I want to show them that I respect and care for them. Even using the words "please" and "thank you" when talking is a very nice way to show respect. Just yesterday, one of my good friends was repeatedly opening doors for me and doing little things that were obviously quite chivalrous...and it only made me admire the person that he is even more. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites MarkM 0 #14 May 26, 2004 Personally I don't get the connection of carrying someone bags or opening a door for them as showing respect. It's polite for sure, but it shows respect? I guess I see respect as being a much deeper thing, something beyond a simple behavior a trained chimp could duplicate. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites Cajundude 0 #15 May 26, 2004 Definitely not dead. I open doors all the time. It's courteous and gentlemanlike. I even let women enter and exit elevators before me. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites Katzeye 0 #16 May 26, 2004 QuoteChivalry is alive and well, and is nothing more that a Gentlemanly show of respect! I think we call it good manners. AMEN! Check out this book: The Compleat Gentleman: The Modern Man's Guide to Chivalry Is a chicken omelette redundant? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites seekfun 0 #17 May 26, 2004 Katzeye, Is this book worth reading for those already categorizing ourselves as 'chivalrous', or is it simply full of stuff our Dad's should have demonstrated to us? I'm curious. I read a lot. And, in about 25 more pages, it'll be time for another book. TTFN, topher "...there is a there out there..." - Tom Robbins Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites SkyDekker 1,465 #18 May 26, 2004 QuoteHmmmm, but then again.....when your man opens the car door for you is it to be nice? Or is it because he really wants to ensure you aren't going to be driving? Gotta wonder Actually it is just to look up your skirt Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites Katzeye 0 #19 May 26, 2004 I don't know, I only found it last week! Reading the reviews tho it sounds pretty good. LA* Is a chicken omelette redundant? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites Stacy 0 #20 May 26, 2004 Quote when your man opens the car door for you is it to be nice? Or is it because he really wants to ensure you aren't going to be driving? Gotta wonder. THAT explains why Galen always opens the car door for me! dammit! __ Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites DrunkMonkey 0 #21 May 26, 2004 I open car/building doors, push chairs in, pick up dinner tabs, walk on the sidewalk closer to the street, etc... and I'm 100% unapologetic about it. My father taught me to do things that way, and mom showed me how ladies ought to appreciate such deferrence... However, paying more for the same jump ticket is still horseshit... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites Luv2Fall 0 #22 May 26, 2004 Quote The other day, I got caught checking out some guy's girlfriend. He caught me red handed. Then, he gave me a stare as if he was wishing me a fate worse than death. It was a terrifying stare. Then, 30 seconds later, I watch him and his girlfriend leave the parking lot we were standing in, and he didn't even open up the car door for her. How can he stare me down like that and then not even open the door for her? I sensed a contradiction in his behavior, and it's got me observing. What are your thoughts? topher Prolly a "security/insecurity" issue more than anything. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites jtval 0 #23 May 26, 2004 chivalry is NOT dead. at least in this man's heart/head. its not necessarily a sign of obedience,respect,or condecendance. I just think If I open the door for people it may help them out. as for my G/f I open her side of the door first when I drive somewhere as a sign of appreciation, thoughtfulness etc. OF COURSE, i respect her or I wouldnt be driving with her in the first place LOL But I make sure I dont over do it or then its just plain overbearingMy photos My Videos Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites VanillaSkyGirl 6 #24 May 26, 2004 Quotechivalry is NOT dead. at least in this man's heart/head. its not necessarily a sign of obedience,respect,or condecendance. I just think If I open the door for people it may help them out. as for my G/f I open her side of the door first when I drive somewhere as a sign of appreciation, thoughtfulness etc. OF COURSE, i respect her or I wouldnt be driving with her in the first place LOL But I make sure I dont over do it or then its just plain overbearing I LOVE and TOTALLY agree with everything that you wrote, JT. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites jtval 0 #25 May 26, 2004 Thanks. You should see my ....penmenship!My photos My Videos Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites Prev 1 2 3 Next Page 1 of 3 Join the conversation You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account. Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible. Reply to this topic... × Pasted as rich text. Paste as plain text instead Only 75 emoji are allowed. × Your link has been automatically embedded. Display as a link instead × Your previous content has been restored. Clear editor × You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL. Insert image from URL × Desktop Tablet Phone Submit Reply 0 Go To Topic Listing
MarkM 0 #14 May 26, 2004 Personally I don't get the connection of carrying someone bags or opening a door for them as showing respect. It's polite for sure, but it shows respect? I guess I see respect as being a much deeper thing, something beyond a simple behavior a trained chimp could duplicate. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Cajundude 0 #15 May 26, 2004 Definitely not dead. I open doors all the time. It's courteous and gentlemanlike. I even let women enter and exit elevators before me. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Katzeye 0 #16 May 26, 2004 QuoteChivalry is alive and well, and is nothing more that a Gentlemanly show of respect! I think we call it good manners. AMEN! Check out this book: The Compleat Gentleman: The Modern Man's Guide to Chivalry Is a chicken omelette redundant? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
seekfun 0 #17 May 26, 2004 Katzeye, Is this book worth reading for those already categorizing ourselves as 'chivalrous', or is it simply full of stuff our Dad's should have demonstrated to us? I'm curious. I read a lot. And, in about 25 more pages, it'll be time for another book. TTFN, topher "...there is a there out there..." - Tom Robbins Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
SkyDekker 1,465 #18 May 26, 2004 QuoteHmmmm, but then again.....when your man opens the car door for you is it to be nice? Or is it because he really wants to ensure you aren't going to be driving? Gotta wonder Actually it is just to look up your skirt Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Katzeye 0 #19 May 26, 2004 I don't know, I only found it last week! Reading the reviews tho it sounds pretty good. LA* Is a chicken omelette redundant? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Stacy 0 #20 May 26, 2004 Quote when your man opens the car door for you is it to be nice? Or is it because he really wants to ensure you aren't going to be driving? Gotta wonder. THAT explains why Galen always opens the car door for me! dammit! __ Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
DrunkMonkey 0 #21 May 26, 2004 I open car/building doors, push chairs in, pick up dinner tabs, walk on the sidewalk closer to the street, etc... and I'm 100% unapologetic about it. My father taught me to do things that way, and mom showed me how ladies ought to appreciate such deferrence... However, paying more for the same jump ticket is still horseshit... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Luv2Fall 0 #22 May 26, 2004 Quote The other day, I got caught checking out some guy's girlfriend. He caught me red handed. Then, he gave me a stare as if he was wishing me a fate worse than death. It was a terrifying stare. Then, 30 seconds later, I watch him and his girlfriend leave the parking lot we were standing in, and he didn't even open up the car door for her. How can he stare me down like that and then not even open the door for her? I sensed a contradiction in his behavior, and it's got me observing. What are your thoughts? topher Prolly a "security/insecurity" issue more than anything. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
jtval 0 #23 May 26, 2004 chivalry is NOT dead. at least in this man's heart/head. its not necessarily a sign of obedience,respect,or condecendance. I just think If I open the door for people it may help them out. as for my G/f I open her side of the door first when I drive somewhere as a sign of appreciation, thoughtfulness etc. OF COURSE, i respect her or I wouldnt be driving with her in the first place LOL But I make sure I dont over do it or then its just plain overbearingMy photos My Videos Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
VanillaSkyGirl 6 #24 May 26, 2004 Quotechivalry is NOT dead. at least in this man's heart/head. its not necessarily a sign of obedience,respect,or condecendance. I just think If I open the door for people it may help them out. as for my G/f I open her side of the door first when I drive somewhere as a sign of appreciation, thoughtfulness etc. OF COURSE, i respect her or I wouldnt be driving with her in the first place LOL But I make sure I dont over do it or then its just plain overbearing I LOVE and TOTALLY agree with everything that you wrote, JT. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites jtval 0 #25 May 26, 2004 Thanks. You should see my ....penmenship!My photos My Videos Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites Prev 1 2 3 Next Page 1 of 3 Join the conversation You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account. Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible. Reply to this topic... × Pasted as rich text. Paste as plain text instead Only 75 emoji are allowed. × Your link has been automatically embedded. Display as a link instead × Your previous content has been restored. Clear editor × You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL. Insert image from URL × Desktop Tablet Phone Submit Reply 0
jtval 0 #25 May 26, 2004 Thanks. You should see my ....penmenship!My photos My Videos Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
