Rules for contacting IT support ....

[SkydiveMonkey 0]

Had a user complain cos a JetDirect wasn't working - going through the normal procedures with it, it was only after about 15 minutes they mentioned that a bottle of water had been spilt over it. THey ordered a new one and it's now in their office covered in THICK plastic

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Say no to subliminal messages

[LuvToFly 0]

Of course, though, there are now corporate Help Desks located in India. So folks call across the ocean, talk to someone they barely understand, that gets interpreted by a person from a different culture/language - gets sent back to the states as a Work Order ticket. Thousands of miles, and two language translations before it can get back to a tech to help someone sitting next to them because their inkjet printer is stuck. Some genius got a raise for this plan. Here's a clue: The printer cost about $40 to buy, with cartridges in this case. Could have had some in stock, thrown the other one away and plugged in the new one and would have been cheaper than this process.

Okay, getting pissed off. Gonna start a thread about outsourcing - anyone been affected by that??

"The helicopter approaches closer than any other to fulfillment
of mankind's ancient dreams of a magic carpet" - Igor Sikorsky

[ifall 0]

I little off the subject (sorta), but I am adding users that are located in the Phillipines taking some of our overflow calls and can't help to snicker at some of these names: Ulynimpa Dimabuyu, Jinky Salucop etc.... Anyways, back to work I know....

[CrazyIvan 0]

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Okay, getting pissed off. Gonna start a thread about outsourcing - anyone been affected by that??

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Blue Skies and May the Force be with you.

[ifall 0]

Here's one. Reset a user's password because they forgot it. Called them up said "your password is _ you should be good to go." Calls me back "it's not working" verified the password and decided to go pay her a visit to see what the problem was. She was putting in underscore.

[DTOXX 0]

My wifes boss wanted his computer positioned as close to the "computer box" (his words) as possible so it would be faster. As he was explaining this to me in front of my wife I shot her a look. She was shaking her head at me to keep my mouth shut.

The computer box turns out to be a 4 port network hub. I left it at that.

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D.T. Holder
SIMstudy

[CrazyIvan 0]

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My wifes boss wanted his computer positioned as close to the "computer box" (his words) as possible so it would be faster. As he was explaining this to me in front of my wife I shot her a look. She was shaking her head at me to keep my mouth shut.

The computer box turns out to be a 4 port network hub. I left it at that.

Just a tip, using SHORTER cables also help

__________________________________________
Blue Skies and May the Force be with you.

[ifall 0]

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My wifes boss wanted his computer positioned as close to the "computer box" (his words) as possible so it would be faster. As he was explaining this to me in front of my wife I shot her a look. She was shaking her head at me to keep my mouth shut.

The computer box turns out to be a 4 port network hub. I left it at that.

The straighter the cable is the better also. If data has to go around a bend it slows it down.

[ifall 0]

Oh and don't forget to point the monitor towards the hub if you can.

[happythoughts 0]

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Just a tip, using SHORTER cables also help

In some of the early Crays, they actually did this.

On cold days, I tell people to disconnect their network cable and hang it off the desk to let it thaw.

[WFFC 1]

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BTW, I want to see the WFFC video.

I'll call you when I have it and you can come visit and we'll hook up with Bernice and Beth and drink lots of margaritas while we partake in the excitement.

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Just figure out a way to make me happy.

OK all, help me out with this one...is this humanly possible????

Love ya Mar~

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~~~Michael

[gravitysurfer 0]

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Here's one. Reset a user's password because they forgot it. Called them up said "your password is _ you should be good to go." Calls me back "it's not working" verified the password and decided to go pay her a visit to see what the problem was. She was putting in underscore.

lol been there.

Ok mam your password has been reset. your new password is "id10t"

aloha.

[ifall 0]

I was bored one day and wanted to mess with a particular person and while I was loading a new program to their PC I told them if they move the mouse in circles around the screen it makes the program initially load a little faster. To my suprise the person believed me

[CrazyIvan 0]

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Ok mam your password has been reset. your new password is "id10t"

I used to setup temporary passwords such as "muffin", "creampie" knowing that the user will NEVER change them (until it was time to do it, every 90 days)

__________________________________________
Blue Skies and May the Force be with you.

[nathaniel 0]

reprogram the led on the printer to say "Please insert 25c"

take a screenshot of the desktop and set it as the background image.

invert the mouse and set the sensitivity to 0.0001 or whatever the lowest value is

change all the icons and mouse pointers to the corn theme

My advice is to do what your parents did; get a job, sir. The bums will always lose. Do you hear me, Lebowski?

[CrazyIvan 0]

About icons, when Windows 3.11 was 'the shit' , I used to do this joke, putting ALL the icons one on top of another, so you see ONLY ONE!!!!, the guy using the computer panicked, because he thought everything was gone

And of course, still an 'oldie but goodie' add a pic of an icon to a wallpaper, and watch someone trying to click on it or delete it

__________________________________________
Blue Skies and May the Force be with you.