Cool t shirt sayings

[Brains 2]

Snowflake has one that says, "Fuck more, bitch less" I thought it was pretty funny

Never look down on someone, unless they are going down on you.

[QuickDraw 0]

A mate of mine saw one that said..

"I hate old people... they smell of piss."

I couldn't argue with that.

-- Hope you don't die. --

I'm fucking winning

[pds 0]

fuck consensus reality

you are being lied to

the cia traffics drugs

there are 10 kinds of people. those that understand binary and those that dont.

select * from users where clue >0;go
0 records returned

code poet

namaste, motherfucker.

[airtwardo 7]

I have a Tee-Shirt...
and a couple of bumper stickers that read;


SKYDIVERS ARE GOOD!
*To the last drop*

~ If you choke a Smurf, what color does it turn? ~

[Mayhem 0]

I got a Camoflage shirt that says "I'm here about the Hummer!"

------------------------------------------------------------
What have you done to make your life better?

[happythoughts 0]

I went to school with a guy who had just got out of the Navy. He had a shirt that said "I won't go down on the ship, but I'll go down on your little sister."

Drunks in bars would walk up and say, in a threatening tone, "Look buddy, you don't even know my little sister."

He finally quit wearing it.

[McDuck 0]

I have a shirt that says, "Fuck with me and I will saw off your legs" and it has a solid white outline of a person with a hand saw over the...you guessed it, legs.

There's one that I want to get that says, "I'm the teenage girl you jerked off in the chatroom with."

Kevin - Sonic Beef #5 - OrFun #28
"I never take myself too seriously, 'cuz everybody know fat birds don't fly." - FLC
Online communities: proof that people never mature much past high school.

[alanab 0]

a artender (female) down here at OU has a shirt that says "i fuck on the first date"

[bch7773 0]

Quote

There's one that I want to get that says, "I'm the teenage girl you jerked off in the chatroom with."

bwahahhahah. thats horrible, but its hilarious.

MB 3528, RB 1182

[juanesky 0]

The Joy of Sex

I Need Somebody Bad. Are You Somebody Bad?
At My Age, Getting Lucky Is Finding My Car in the Parking Lot
Remember When Sex Was Safe and Skydiving Was Dangerous?
The Battle of the Sexes

Men Are Like Grapes. If You Stomp on Them and Keep Them in the Dark Long Enough, They Might Turn Into Something That You Would Take to Dinner
My Wife Comes With Instructions -- Lots of Instructions
He Rules the Roost -- But I Rule the Rooster
(On the front) Randolph-Macon Woman's College (On the back) Not a Girls' School with No Men, but a Women's College with No Boys
Never Go to Bed Mad. Stay Up and Fight
Parenting Pearls of Wisdom

I Childproofed My House, But They Still Get In!
We Got Rid of the Kids -- The Cat Was Allergic
Got Pickles? (on a maternity shirt)
Don't Worry, Mom -- It's Just a Phase
You Spend the First Two Years of Their Lives Teaching Them to Walk and Talk -- and the Next 16 Telling Them to Sit Down and Shut Up
The Joy of Aging

(On the front) 60 Is Not Old . . . (On the back) If You're a Tree
I'm Still Hot -- It Just Comes in Flashes
I'm Not 50 -- I'm $49.95 Plus Tax
I Know I Came Into This Room for a Reason
Fifty Is the Ultimate F-Word
Wrinkled Was Not One of the Things I Wanted to Be When I Grew Up
Feeling Stressed?

I Used to Have a Handle on Life, But It Broke
Out of My Mind. Back in Five Minutes
My Reality Check Just Bounced
Cancel My Subscription -- I Don't Need Your Issues
Dangerously Under-Medicated
Madness Takes Its Toll -- Please Have Exact Change
No Pain, No Gain

Every Time I Hear the Dirty Word 'Exercise' I Wash My Mouth Out With Chocolate
Physically Pffffft!
It's One of Those Days

Some Days You're the Pigeon, Some Days You're the Statue
Earth Is the Insane Asylum for the Universe
Life Is Short -- Make Fun of It
Travel Fun

Buckle Up. It Makes It Harder for the Aliens to Snatch You From Your Car
Hang Up and Drive
I Took the Road Less Traveled, and Now Where the Heck Am I?
Welcome to Tennessee -- Set Your Watch Back 20 Years
Good Advice

Use Vowels Every Day or You'll Get Consonated
Don't Hate Yourself in the Morning -- Sleep Till Noon
Ego-Boosters

I'm Not a Snob. I'm Just Better Than You Are
Live Your Life So That When You Die, the Preacher Will Not Have to Tell Lies at Your Funeral
If You Think Nobody Cares, Try Missing a Couple of Payments
Pets Rule

It's My Dog's World. I'm Just Here to Open Cans
Cats Regard People As Warm-Blooded Furniture
A Dog's Parents Never Visit
What's Your IQ?

Suppose You Were an Idiot...And Suppose You Were a Member of Congress...But I Repeat Myself
My Mind Works Like Lightning -- One Brilliant Flash and It's Gone
God Must Love Stupid People -- He Made So Many
I Have a Short Attention...
Making It Big In This World

I'm Destined for Greatness -- I'm Just Pacing Myself
I Was God's Gift to Women, But I Have Been Rewrapped and Placed on a Closet Shelf
I've Gone to Find Myself. If I Get Back Before I've Found Me, Please Keep Me Here
Bless Me, Father

Protons Have Mass! And I Didn't Even Know They Were Catholic
Heck Is Where People Go Who Don't Believe in Gosh
Retirement

Retirement -- Twice as Much Husband for Half as Much Money
Before You Can Be Old and Wise, You Must First Be Young and Stupid
Retired -- I Was Tired Yesterday and I'm Tired Again Today
My Back Goes Out More Than I Do
Retired -- Know It All and Got Plenty of Time to Tell You About It

"According to some of the conservatives here, it sounds like it's fine to beat your wide - as long as she had it coming." -Billvon

[McDuck 0]

Quote

Quote

There's one that I want to get that says, "I'm the teenage girl you jerked off in the chatroom with."

bwahahhahah. thats horrible, but its hilarious.

It will make some people cringe, and others laugh...we know what the cringing means.

If you go to this site, they have loads of stickers and such. I buy loads of them and give them away at the DZ. And there are some pretty edgy tshirts here.

But my all time favorite tshirt is the one with a young Gary Coleman with "Bling Bling" in diamond lettering beneath it. So sarcastic.

Kevin - Sonic Beef #5 - OrFun #28
"I never take myself too seriously, 'cuz everybody know fat birds don't fly." - FLC
Online communities: proof that people never mature much past high school.

[cop 0]

My translations may be like shit but;

My favourite t-shirts;

"I'm outpatient"

"Those have best laughs who have strongest medication"

T-shirt with printed prescription "5 x 20mg Diapam 3 times per day for general pissed off mood"

"Just go on and fuck with me, there is plenty of room behind the sauna" (if someone really pisses you of, we have phrase "he should be taken behind the sauna and...)

"You can call me Mike"

[G5fh84 0]

Don't Tailgate me or I'll flick a booger on your Goggles

[Zenister 0]

its actually an old henry rolling tour shirt but i still love it

in small print on the top
Ways to Die #401

in very large letters

Touch me I'm a Freak.

its one of my favorite shirts but i considered giving it to someone at Eloy just to watch the carnage ensue

____________________________________
Those who fail to learn from the past are simply Doomed.

[Jayruss 0]

the best one I have is "friends don't let friends go to New Jersey”

__________________________________________________
"Beware how you take away hope from another human being."
-Oliver Wendell Holmes

[Kramer 0]

I saw a funny one the other day:

Why Kobe Why?

(Insert Picture of Kobe's Accuser Here)

I chuckled, I did.

-Kramer

The FAKE KRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAMER!!!!!!!!!

[SkyPsycho 0]

Quote

the best one I have is "friends don't let friends go to New Jersey”

i saw a nj shirt last week that said: new jersey, where the weak are killed and eaten


my old united shirt says on the back : see dick skydive, see dick swoop, girls like dick......and there are 2 stick figure chicks with big cans hangin on dick

_______________________________
HK MP5SD.........silence is golden

[usedtajump 1]

Used to be a bumper sticker from one of the Okla. DZs that said " Skydivers Have More Fun Than People." Had that one on my car for years.

The older I get the less I care who I piss off.

[Canuck278 0]

A friend of mine has a bumper sticker on his beat up van that says...."don't laugh...you daughter is in here"

Steve
Therapy is expensive, popping bubble wrap is cheap.

[mccurley 1]

I used to have a non-skydiving related one, that I was only game to ware at the DZ it read

If the lord had not intended for man to eat pussy, he wouldn't have made it look so much like a Taco.

One of the girls at the DZ bailed me up while she read it and said "I don't get it, do Mexicans eat cats?"

Watch my video Fat Women
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eRWkEky8GoI

[Atlas 0]

At one point I was driving along and came across a truck with a bumper sticker that said:

"Master Baits, For the fisherman that fishes alone."

Easily applicable to a T-Shirt :)

[tbrown 26]

Saw one once that said, "Smile Motherfucker" that made me chuckle.

Your humble servant.....Professor Gravity !

[DivaSkyChick 0]

I have a great tank top that says "Did I have fun last night?" Always seems to get laughs on a Sunday morning at the DZ.

---
www.facebook.com/mandyhamptonfitch

[TitaniumLegs 8]

Quote

and while we're at it, not skydive related but: "Hold my beer while I kiss your girlfriend."

Who says that's not skydiving related? That's perfectly acceptable, standard, heck, almost required behaviour for a skydiver, especially an instructor.

(>o|-<

If you don't believe me, ask me.

[Faber 0]

just bourght a shirt sayin

"Don´t worry
Come after me
to protect
yourself"

then theres a delil in freefall just below it.Got it in a non skydive gearshop,i just could walk by whith out getting one

Stay safe
Stefan Faber