PhillyKev 0 #26 September 24, 2003 QuoteI'd consider cheating to be anything where touching is involved with someone else other than your SO! Whoa...your man can't get lap dances at his friend's bachelor party? I don't think there are many who could not cheat under that definition. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Vallerina 2 #27 September 24, 2003 QuoteWell, now you are saying that in regards to cheating the reaction is to be taken into consideration more than the action? Uhh...no. If Joe and Sue agreed that neither one would kiss anybody, but Joe has a wild night at the bar where he kissed 3 girls, then that's cheating. If Sue didn't really care, if Sue did care...it doesn't matter. He broke the rules that they had, hence he "cheated."There's a thin line between Saturday night and Sunday morning Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
wildblue 7 #28 September 24, 2003 QuoteWhoa...your man can't get lap dances at his friend's bachelor party? I don't think there are many who could not cheat under that definition. I should point you to the strip club thread in the woman's forum. Some people feel that way.it's like incest - you're substituting convenience for quality Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Pammi 0 #29 September 24, 2003 I'm with most of you...it depends on what you've set out in the relationship as acceptable and not. Pretty easy. But something you have to figure out in the beginning because you may assume they have the same ideas as you about it but find out too late they don't. I'd be more hurt if Merrick fell in love with another woman then f***ed her. I think you can emotionally cheat as well...so HA! If he were to begin sharing his thoughts, dreams, feelings and time with another woman, particularly if he wasn't doing that with me anymore, I think that damages a relationship, possibly worse then sex. I'm not saying you can't be close friends with the opposite sex, we both are, but you shouldn't let them be closer to you then your SO. If you are, then why? I'm also not saying that you can't have feelings for another person. You can't help that...you can help pursuing and nurturing those feelings though. I *do* think sex can be just sex, while love or such feelings are deeper. Pammi Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
whocares 0 #30 September 24, 2003 Uhh...no. If Joe and Sue agreed that neither one would kiss anybody, but Joe has a wild night at the bar where he kissed 3 girls, then that's cheating. If Sue didn't really care, if Sue did care...it doesn't matter. He broke the rules that they had, hence he "cheated." *** this would apply to highschool. I go to the DZ and see lady friends, give them a kiss, that does not make me a cheater. now if i bent one over or had he slob bob then i would be a cheater... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Casie 0 #31 September 24, 2003 QuoteQuoteI'd consider cheating to be anything where touching is involved with someone else other than your SO! Whoa...your man can't get lap dances at his friend's bachelor party? I don't think there are many who could not cheat under that definition. I should have given more detail....sorry! Anything where touching is involved such as with the mouth & private areas!~Porn Kitty WARNING: Goldschlager causes extreme emotional outbursts! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Vallerina 2 #32 September 24, 2003 Pammi, I completely agree with you!There's a thin line between Saturday night and Sunday morning Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
bkdice 0 #33 September 24, 2003 I agree that lying is cheating. But, as it's been pointed out, being honest about what happened, doesn't necessarily make it ok. Some people might consider a kiss cheating. Others might see a kiss between 2 girls as not cheating. Everyone's got their own "rules" in their head about whats OK and whats not. Both parties in a relationship need to effectively communicate what is acceptable and whats not and stick to it or separate. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
turtlespeed 221 #34 September 24, 2003 I agree w/ Pammi here. In order to "Cheat" rules have to have been established, either implied or otherwise agreed upon. cheat ( P ) Pronunciation Key (cht) v. cheat·ed, cheat·ing, cheats v. tr. To deceive by trickery; swindle: cheated customers by overcharging them for purchases. To deprive by trickery; defraud: cheated them of their land. To mislead; fool: illusions that cheat the eye. To elude; escape: cheat death. v. intr. To act dishonestly; practice fraud. To violate rules deliberately, as in a game: was accused of cheating at cards. Informal. To be sexually unfaithful: cheat on a spouse. n. An act of cheating; a fraud or swindle. One who cheats; a swindler. Law. Fraudulent acquisition of another's property. Botany. An annual European species of brome grass (Bromus secalinus) widely naturalized in temperate regions.I'm not usually into the whole 3-way thing, but you got me a little excited with that. - Skymama BTR #1 / OTB^5 Official #2 / Hellfish #408 / VSCR #108/Tortuga/Orfun Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
juanesky 0 #35 September 24, 2003 Cool, so I can go to Foxy Lady and come back full of glitter, and no prob... thanks for the great advice everyone!!!"According to some of the conservatives here, it sounds like it's fine to beat your wide - as long as she had it coming." -Billvon Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
jerm 0 #36 September 24, 2003 Quote this would apply to highschool. I go to the DZ and see lady friends, give them a kiss, that does not make me a cheater. now if i bent one over or had he slob bob then i would be a cheater... it's cheating if it's against the esablighed rules of your relationship... you probably wouldn't have a relationship where kissing someone else was considered cheating... if you did, and you went to the DZ and kissed people, then it WAS cheating. This whole thing is very personal -- as in it varies form person to person... cheating is breaking the rules of the game.... the rules of the games can vary depending on who's playing, so different games can have very different rules. Landing without injury is not necessarily evidence that you didn't fuck up... it just means you got away with it this time Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
sunshine 2 #37 September 24, 2003 QuoteI'd be more hurt if Merrick fell in love with another woman then f***ed her. I think you can emotionally cheat as well...so HA! If he were to begin sharing his thoughts, dreams, feelings and time with another woman, particularly if he wasn't doing that with me anymore, I think that damages a relationship, possibly worse then sex. I'm not saying you can't be close friends with the opposite sex, we both are, but you shouldn't let them be closer to you then your SO. If you are, then why? I'm also not saying that you can't have feelings for another person. You can't help that...you can help pursuing and nurturing those feelings though. I *do* think sex can be just sex, while love or such feelings are deeper. Pammi, you said it perfectly. I once had a boyfreind that cheated on me. The part that hurt was that he was emotionally connected to this other person, the fact that they were fucking didn't hurt near as much as their emotional closeness. ___________________________________________ meow I get a Mike hug! I get a Mike hug! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Pammi 0 #38 September 24, 2003 QuotePammi, I completely agree with you! Well dang...and here I was prepping for a fight on that one. LOL! We really are earily alike it seems! ('cept you got the cool wingsuit in your av...where's the big pic of that!?) Pammi Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
juanesky 0 #39 September 24, 2003 Hey Pammi, speaking of cheating and definitions on sex, where is your avatar?"According to some of the conservatives here, it sounds like it's fine to beat your wide - as long as she had it coming." -Billvon Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
freeflybella 0 #40 September 24, 2003 QuoteIf Joe and Sue agreed that neither one would kiss anybody, but Joe has a wild night at the bar where he kissed 3 girls, then that's cheating. If Sue didn't really care, if Sue did care...it doesn't matter. He broke the rules that they had, hence he "cheated." Exactly! The same goes for lying. If Joe lies then the next day tells Sue he lied. He still lied. I think Foz was agreeing with that - and that Dove was the one questioning it. Action expresses priority. - Mahatma Ghandi Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Vallerina 2 #41 September 24, 2003 hehe! The pic is in this thread: http://www.dropzone.com/cgi-bin/forum/gforum.cgi?post=672946;sb=post_latest_reply;so=ASC;forum_view=forum_view_collapsed;;page=unread#unread So, I have a question for you all. Did anybody set up a "This is not considered cheating" type thing, but then after such an event happened changed your mind? (Did that make sense at all?)There's a thin line between Saturday night and Sunday morning Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
jerm 0 #42 September 24, 2003 QuoteIf he does it, and then he runs straight to you and tells you about it, that's not lying sure it is. If you said it was against the rules and both agreed not to break the rules, then that was a liw.. the lie was in the action, telling you about it is comin clean about the lie. cheating is breaking the rules, be it chess or a 4way meet or a relationship. Landing without injury is not necessarily evidence that you didn't fuck up... it just means you got away with it this time Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
freeflybella 0 #43 September 24, 2003 Cheating is lying. Whatever you feel about monogamy, however you feel about love vs. fucking, whether you tell, don't tell, do it once, do it all the time. Whatever. If you do anything that is contrary to your commitment, on whatever level - you're cheating. Action expresses priority. - Mahatma Ghandi Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
jerm 0 #44 September 24, 2003 QuoteWhatever you feel about monogamy, however you feel about love vs. fucking, whether you tell, don't tell, do it once, do it all the time. Whatever. If you do anything that is contrary to your commitment, on whatever level - you're cheating. amen, 100% Landing without injury is not necessarily evidence that you didn't fuck up... it just means you got away with it this time Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
bkdice 0 #45 September 24, 2003 QuoteWhatever you feel about monogamy, however you feel about love vs. fucking, whether you tell, don't tell, do it once, do it all the time. Whatever. If you do anything that is contrary to your commitment, on whatever level - you're cheating. Well said. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites happythoughts 0 #46 September 24, 2003 Suspicion of cheating? (see attachment) Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites GrumpySmurf 0 #47 September 24, 2003 It is only cheating if you get caught Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites happythoughts 0 #48 September 24, 2003 QuoteDid anybody set up a "This is not considered cheating" type thing, but then after such an event happened changed your mind? (Did that make sense at all?) I have seen this happen in two cases. "We're going to be apart at college for a long time so we'll date others and it's ok..." and people with open relationships. There is a seminar (really) for these topics and the first thing that they tell them is that they will be surprised how much jealousy emerges, even though each understood the ground rules. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites sunshine 2 #49 September 24, 2003 Quote"We're going to be apart at college for a long time so we'll date others and it's ok..." and people with open relationships. There is a seminar (really) for these topics and the first thing that they tell them is that they will be surprised how much jealousy emerges, even though each understood the ground rules. Yeah, like when 2 people agree to just be "friends with benefits" but 1 of the people actually ends up liking the other one. That can get really bad. ___________________________________________ meow I get a Mike hug! I get a Mike hug! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites bkdice 0 #50 September 24, 2003 QuoteYeah, like when 2 people agree to just be "friends with benefits" but 1 of the people actually ends up liking the other one. That can get really bad. Same crap can happen when exes have sex. Seen that really hurt some people. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites Prev 1 2 3 4 Next Page 2 of 4 Join the conversation You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account. Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible. Reply to this topic... × Pasted as rich text. Paste as plain text instead Only 75 emoji are allowed. × Your link has been automatically embedded. Display as a link instead × Your previous content has been restored. Clear editor × You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL. Insert image from URL × Desktop Tablet Phone Submit Reply 0
happythoughts 0 #46 September 24, 2003 Suspicion of cheating? (see attachment) Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
GrumpySmurf 0 #47 September 24, 2003 It is only cheating if you get caught Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
happythoughts 0 #48 September 24, 2003 QuoteDid anybody set up a "This is not considered cheating" type thing, but then after such an event happened changed your mind? (Did that make sense at all?) I have seen this happen in two cases. "We're going to be apart at college for a long time so we'll date others and it's ok..." and people with open relationships. There is a seminar (really) for these topics and the first thing that they tell them is that they will be surprised how much jealousy emerges, even though each understood the ground rules. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
sunshine 2 #49 September 24, 2003 Quote"We're going to be apart at college for a long time so we'll date others and it's ok..." and people with open relationships. There is a seminar (really) for these topics and the first thing that they tell them is that they will be surprised how much jealousy emerges, even though each understood the ground rules. Yeah, like when 2 people agree to just be "friends with benefits" but 1 of the people actually ends up liking the other one. That can get really bad. ___________________________________________ meow I get a Mike hug! I get a Mike hug! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
bkdice 0 #50 September 24, 2003 QuoteYeah, like when 2 people agree to just be "friends with benefits" but 1 of the people actually ends up liking the other one. That can get really bad. Same crap can happen when exes have sex. Seen that really hurt some people. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
