robskydiv 0 #26 May 28, 2003 Rarely will I do it. Usually, someone else has already broken the silence so if I let one loose, it's quiet and everyone else is blaming the first guy. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
freeflir29 0 #27 May 28, 2003 Quote Farting in the plane- Do you.. More and more often I say! I do have the courtesy to crack the door if I am sitting near it though. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
VanillaSkyGirl 6 #28 May 28, 2003 I do have the courtesy to crack the door if I am sitting near it though. Thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
freeflir29 0 #29 May 28, 2003 Quote Thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you... I'm still wondering why I don't get more dates.... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
fundgh 0 #30 May 28, 2003 You mean the sexy pic of me drinking Corona that I posted on the Pic thread...? Shanna who...?You will have to get used to farts in the plane...thats just the way it works! ...FUN FOR ALL! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
VanillaSkyGirl 6 #31 May 28, 2003 You mean the sexy pic of me drinking Corona that I posted on the Pic thread...? Shanna who...? ...thats just the way it works! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
helicam 0 #32 May 28, 2003 I think Squeak is a Master of this........is the story true about an entire load exiting at like 3500?? I am ready to meet my Maker. Whether my Maker is prepared for the great ordeal of meeting me is another matter Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Luv2Fall 0 #33 May 28, 2003 Maybe I haven't had enough jumps. I have only eleven, but know darn well I haven't as the loads include ladies. It's fucking killing me, but so far so good. I had that attitude, also, when I first began to date my wife. I swore that I would never, never, never fart in front of her. Dating was freakin miserable as the change in diet that often accompanies dating, was screwing me up. I couldn't wait to get into my car and haul ass away from her place. Anyway, that changed one night while spending the night with her (I'm a sinner so what LOL). Here we were butt-ass naked in a deep sleep and my system starts to have a mind of its own. As I was sleeping - ass against her stomach and her left arm over top of me - my ass exploded - so loud and long it woke the both of us up. I played it cool and pretended I was still asleep - I hear nothing from her, but she was giggling underneath her breath as I felt it from her body. The next morning, she told me what happened and I couldn't hold a straight face and laughed my ass off and told her my version. Anyway, that was the first fart of many in the presence of my wife. Maybe one day, something will similarly "ms?" happen in the plane, but it hasn't yet. Edited........my grammer is lacking LOL. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
moodyskydiver 0 #34 May 28, 2003 Quote I know you can do it. I'm sure if a penis got too close to your butt you could figure out a way to defy physics and make this happen. ROFLMAO! *wipes away tears* Girl that is SO true! If most guys know theres another guy behind them, you couldn't pry their butt apart with a crowbar and the jaws of life. But for some reason they just can't do that when it comes to sharing their bodily functions. "...just an earthbound misfit, I." Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
fundgh 0 #35 May 28, 2003 why put myself through that kind of discomfort because one girl gets dry heaves! Its not that people can't hold it, I can and usually do, as long as it doesn't hurt, when my stomach starts inflating and my eyes are bulging out (usually around 13000 ft) I let er go. Sorry...that is the way it is. I know that 1-15 other people on the load are doing the same thing....FUN FOR ALL! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
jerry81 10 #36 May 28, 2003 and besides, you gotta be relaxed when you exit the plane if you want to perform best (at least I know I do). When you relax, things can happen. Although it's not that bad if the door is already open- let out a 'farewell fart' and jump. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Skypup 0 #37 May 28, 2003 I find that a good fart helps launch a 4-way out the door. Not only that but it insures that you get lots of separation from the other groups. T.S.S # 5 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ To dream great dreams is itself an act of daring. -Eric Shipton & Bill Tilman ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Sebazz1 2 #38 May 28, 2003 It's skydiver farts that are eating up the ozone layer you bastard!! Keep those farts in the hot tub where they belong!!! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
fasterfaller 0 #39 May 28, 2003 Quote I laugh, and laugh a lot. So far I've made a jumper cry due to a fart and have forced the door open... You must have one powerful ass , I have never made anyone cry because of my farts . Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Sebazz1 2 #40 May 28, 2003 I've heard women claim their farts smell like fresh roses... I don't believe them. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
lizzieb 0 #41 May 28, 2003 what are you talking about? women don't fart Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Sebazz1 2 #42 May 28, 2003 Asila has that sticker on her helmet that says "Chicks Who Rip!" I assume that means chicks who rip farts!! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
fundgh 0 #43 May 28, 2003 That is because they learn at a young age what their "flower" is and the smell becomes an association!...FUN FOR ALL! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
MrHixxx 0 #44 May 28, 2003 I am a very bad man, guilty on all counts. Many times I have fouled the cabin with my sweet essence. Even in the dead of winter in a cramped Cessna with the heater blowin' have I torched comrades in air. However, a note to my victims. Justice was served on a wintery Nebraska night. I was at a Japanese steakhouse with my boy Drake. I had just gorged myself with steak, chicken and shrimp and was filled to the brim. Drake looks at me with the dreadful squinty-face and says "Dad, I gotta poop". So, I take him into the bathroom and sit him down and he fires off the first salvo. Whoa, that takes care of most of the oxygen in the place. I say "Okay buddy, are ya done?" he answers "No Dad, some are stuck" He then looks at his belly and says "Bad Poops, get out!" So I am realin' from the fumes, there is no escape and he gets me laughin and suckin air. I think we spent 15 minutes in there, without air. Whew, the wonders of parenthood. -Hixxxdeath,as men call him, ends what they call men -but beauty is more now than dying’s when Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
freeflir29 0 #45 May 28, 2003 Quote "Bad Poops, get out!" Man....I have had that EXACT same thought on more than a few Sunday mornings after a good Saturday night. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
robskydiv 0 #46 May 28, 2003 Mr. Hixxx, that was great. Those kids are precious but at times, stinky. Lord knows I've changed my share of diapers. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Luminous 0 #47 May 28, 2003 Claim it and rate it. Ya gotta claim it if it's yours. you get a 10 if the pilot leaves the plane.And what's this "women don't" stuff. I've known women, and been on teams with some, that put me to shame. BSBD Larry Member of 8way team "Stink Fist" Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
fundgh 0 #48 May 28, 2003 My girlfriend recently became comfortable farting around me and my buddies...Damn she's rotten! My farts aren't bad, but she eats veggies like mad! ...FUN FOR ALL! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
AirMail 0 #49 May 29, 2003 At our DZ we always blame Adam. It's usually him anyway. Patrick-- It's never too late to have a happy childhood. Postal Rodriguez, Muff 3342 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
jumprunner 0 #50 May 29, 2003 Quote Quote I laugh, and laugh a lot. So far I've made a jumper cry due to a fart and have forced the door open... You must have one powerful ass , I have never made anyone cry because of my farts . This is by far the funniest thread Ive ever read. Im at work reading this, and by this one I accidentally busted out laughing so hard people were looking over and wondering what the hell was going on. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites