HELP!

[monarch135 0]

Im in a funk lately, life sucks milk, and i cant seem to smile no job no life, no sky no jet fuel...!
"what did you expect to find was it something you left behind do you remember everything i said dont fall away...."

[pop 0]

Suck all the milk you can out of life. It'll give you stronger bones.

7 ounce wonders, music and dogs that are not into beer

[monarch135 0]

laughing!

[AggieDave 6]

Hey, I thought last time you said "suck the milk out of my life, it'll give you shinier hair..."

--"When I die, may I be surrounded by scattered chrome and burning gasoline."

[pop 0]

I was drunk

7 ounce wonders, music and dogs that are not into beer

[Vallerina 2]

A wise woman called the local radio station and said what she does when she's in a bad mood or whatever to relieve tension: she throws ice at her fence! Seriously, though! Try it! If you don't have a fence, a brick wall or something else would work. Ice is dense enough so that it feels like you are actually throwing something. You can hear it break/crack. And, when you're done, there's nothing broken and nothing to clean up!

I've come to the conclusion that alcohol just makes you feel like crap more in the end, so I won't suggest that.

Making out always helps.

There's a thin line between Saturday night and Sunday morning

[themaninblack 0]

basic funk repair instruction manual.....

step 1: get a job packing, or...any nearby form of employment delivering at least enough money to live on mickeyfood and do a minimum of a jump or two a day...i find factories to be reliable if boring employment, myself, and you never run out of factories...(no factories where you are?)

step 2: find some skydivers and just hang out with em. even if you don't know them just kinda hang out and dont do anything. sooner or later one of them will do something entertaining that probably involves removal of clothing in public and consumption of alcoholic beverages. let them hog tie you in your canopy or hit you with a pie or something. this will help with the no life part.

step 3: imagine as vividly as you can your first few jumps before you kinda got used to going out that door. this includes the details like being so scared youre shaking, so excited the sound of someone yelling "DOOR!" is enough to give you a heart attack, then in your minds eye, grin hugely, shriek like a banshee and leap out the door like youre trying to take down a wildebeest with your teeth. this will help with the no-smile problem. you jumped out of an aircraft awhile ago. chances are you will again sometime in the near future. all else is trivial.

step 4: being already at a drop zone with the skydivers from step 2, the fuel and sky problems are already handled. if current sky quality is unacceptable, whip out a case of beer pass a few around and bitch about the gray sky. politely. the sky will hear you and get right on the problem, i know for a fact the sky hates to be seen as boring and if it has been neglecting you and you let it know, it will mix up a nice batch of blueness with occasional puffies for decorative purposes blended well with a warm lightly breezy air mass and send it your way. the sky being somewhat large it may take some time to reach you but rest assured its on its way. did i miss anything?

evolution WILL be served, one way or another!!!! im not jumping, im imitating a reluctant meteor.

[monarch135 0]

thanks!