hooked 0 #1 March 24, 2003 I had to let my dog, Toby go today. Why isn't there an icon for tears? This is so hard, so thanks for listening. We knew it would happen eventually, but not now. I had thought I heard him cry and he wasn't inside so I looked outside. There he was laying on the patio, and every time he tried to move, he faintly cried. It was heart wrenching. Why is it, in times of stress, your mouth feels like it's stuffed with cotton? We put him in a blanket and lifted him into the car and raced to the Vet. Because of his age, his being in a shock condition, and not wanting him to suffer, we decided it was time to say good bye. He actually had cardiac arrest before they could do anything.....so it was time. He will struggle no more to do the things he wants to do. I am emotionally drained and now I have to rid the house of his food, dog dish, beds and many, many, many toys. He is truly loved and will be always, we will miss him dearly. I also have to answer my 2 yr. old grandson question, "Where Toby go?" He loved Toby too. J -------------------------------------- Sometimes we're just being Humans.....But we're always Human Beings. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
wmw999 2,485 #2 March 24, 2003 I'm so sorry. I'm glad he had family around him who cared -- I'm sure that made it easier on him. Take care, and hold onto all of the good memories. Wendy W.There is nothing more dangerous than breaking a basic safety rule and getting away with it. It removes fear of the consequences and builds false confidence. (tbrown) Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
BadDog 0 #3 March 24, 2003 I'm so sorry. It's too bad they have to go. I wish they could stay with us forever. I lost one of my cats pretty much the same way at Christmas time, and it isn't easy. My thoughts are with you. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
QuickDraw 0 #4 March 24, 2003 Man, that always sucks. Time is the only cure right now, and the fact that he went quite quickly, is believe me, a blessing. I lost my first dog 9 years ago, when i was 26, and cried like a baby when the vet put her to sleep. I have not cried since, and have two of the dumbest rescued dogs now, and they always give me joy. I hope you get another when the time feels right, but until then i can only offer my sympathy. -- Hope you don't die. -- I'm fucking winning Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
SpeedRacer 1 #5 March 25, 2003 Very sad. My condolences. Toby looks a lot like Jerry Garcia in that pic! Speed Racer -------------------------------------------------- Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
tigra 0 #6 March 25, 2003 I'm so sorry This is never an easy thing to deal with, but take some comfort in knowing you gave him a good life and he was loved right up to the end. Hugs to you! maura Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
gemini 0 #7 March 25, 2003 Sorry for you. I like to think that we'll get to see our trusting friends again. Always happy to see us, didn't care how dirty we were, never asked for anything except a pat and a scratch, and a little food and water. Blues, Blue skies, Jim Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
mouth 0 #8 March 25, 2003 I am so sorry you lost your Toby. {{{{{HUGS}}}}} to you Know that Toby will be in the sky with you as an angel from now on. -- Hot Mama At least you know where you stand even if it is in a pile of shit. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Michele 1 #9 March 25, 2003 Jan, Toby, in the picture you posted, was smiling. He was saying how much he loved you, protected you, and cared for you. I know you were smiling, too, because you loved him, protected him, and cared for him...even while letting him go, you were caring for him, loving him harder, not allowing him to suffer. It is hard, and it is sad. And I know it will soon be time for me and my BK, and it is with a very heavy heart that I say "I know what you're going through, you are not alone". And when you see the spot of garden he loved best lit with sunshine, know he is there. And when you see the doorway he would always lay across, know he is there. And when, in the darkness of night, you reach for him to pet his head, know he feels it, and is licking your hand back. He may not be here, but he is not gone. He is never farther away then a smile, a ray of sun, a memory held in your heart. Trust that knowledge, and let it guide you now. Many hugs to you, Jan. Ciels- Michele Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Shark 0 #10 March 25, 2003 Jan, That is a very tough loss. I am also sad. Toby looks very happy in the picture and I believe he is smiling.Mark Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
skygal3 0 #11 March 25, 2003 I'm so sorry for your loss. ((hugs)). Please take comfort in knowing Toby is not suffering any longer. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
hooked 0 #12 March 25, 2003 Getting through all my tears, I want to thank you all for your kind words. Michele, you couldn't have said anything more true....... He would always be laying across the doorway! He will always be in my memories, because of how special he was to us. My dream was to have an Old English Sheepdog, and he fulfilled that dream and gave me joy everyday (except when he was sick or made a mess!) He will always be with us, in every room, on every walk, on every Christmas (when we will miss him opening his own gift). Someone said, to get another dog some day. No, I won't, it's just too hard. I will say the same thing a year from now. Maybe, I will be a dog sitter! J -------------------------------------- Sometimes we're just being Humans.....But we're always Human Beings. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
dove 0 #13 March 25, 2003 I am so sorry to hear about your loss. My family always had dogs growing up, and everytime we lost one we'd say we weren't gonna get another because it was just too hard to lose them. So painful and like you said, heart-wrenching. But like they say... better to have loved and lost. In the end, we always got another and it's always worth it. The good news is your baby is in a happy place and is no longer in pain. Hope you heal quickly. Fall in dove. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
JJohnson 0 #14 March 25, 2003 I have cried harder and mourned more for dogs I have known than for most people I know. I feel bad for anyone who has not known the love and affection of dog. Truly one of God's greatest gifts to us......and undoubtably a burden for the dogs. Do we as humans ever really do them justice? I think quite often that they are the higher life form. I feel for you my dear. I really do.JJ "Call me Darth Balls" Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Brisco 0 #15 March 25, 2003 My condolences as well. i too had to say good-bye to my best friend of 12 years about 3 years ago. He had a doggie heart attack and saved me the pain of having to make that awful decision that I knew was coming. I share your tears tonight. On the matter of getting another dog, I swore at the time that I wouldn't do it. I felt that if I got another do I was being "unfaithful" to my friend - a silly choice of wording, but I just don't know any other way to put how I was feeling. And I was being selfish by not ever wanting to experience that pain of loss again. But someone explained to me that I can never replace my friend, but there's nothing wrong with making a new friend. So it was just a few months later - the house being way too quiet - when I brought another furry friend home and I love him just as much. And then not long after that, a stray wandered up and I gave him a home too. I still miss and cry for my old friend. Your story got me going again tonight. But sharing my life with two loving dogs was the best decision I made. "I could have missed the pain, but I would have had to miss the dance." - Garth Brooks Brisco Experience is what you get when you don't get what you want. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
jraf 0 #16 March 25, 2003 Sad, sad, sad I know what it means. My rottweiler Max died of bone marrow cancer at age 7. He was the friendliest stupidest dog I have ever seen. The mailman was affraid of him, cause every time Max would see him, he would jump from joy and bark his friendly but thunderous bark. He was never neutered, but he definitely was gay. She dogs just did not cut it for him. jraf Me Jungleman! Me have large Babalui. Muff #3275 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
MC208B 0 #17 March 25, 2003 As a "keeper" of two Pugs, I feel for you, sorry for your loss. Mike Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Michele 1 #18 March 25, 2003 QuoteSomeone said, to get another dog some day. No, I won't, it's just too hard. I will say the same thing a year from now. Maybe, I will be a dog sitter! What a great choice! The good thing is, you don't have to make any decisions about it now. I won't say "get another one"...and I won't say "don't". I will say that the decision is not ready to be made. You have such a huge heart, Jan...Toby knows how you grieve. You are loved. Ciels- Michele ~Do Angels keep the dreams we seek While our hearts lie bleeding?~ Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
JJohnson 0 #19 March 25, 2003 Nice Golden as your avatar. Trying to steal my thunder? Everyone should be owned by a Golden. The world would be a better place. JJ "Call me Darth Balls" Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
freefallfreak 0 #20 March 25, 2003 Jan, I wasn't gonna reply to this cause it's just sometimes too hard for me put into words my feelings for animals. But I wanna' share something that my Granddad told me once a long time ago before he passed. He told me that nothing lasts forever. Two people could be married for 75 years and eventually one of them left this world before the other. He said that if I could remember this, that when one did leave the other, there would be pain. If I could remember that nothing lasts forever, that although there would be pain, it would be lessened. Empathy is my only redeeming quality and believe me, I feel this pain. Congratulations for giving Toby the best home possible. Take pride and joy in knowing that he will love you always. FFF Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
boudy 0 #21 March 25, 2003 QuoteYou have such a huge heart, Jan...Toby knows how you grieve. You are loved. Just another dog lover here who has felt your pain and offers a thought. Our wonderful k-9 companions bask in our acceptance and our love. It is truley what they live for. While it seems agonizingly unfair that they stay with us such a brief time, may your grief be sweetened by the thought that your love and affection made Toby's life complete. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
riggerrob 643 #22 March 25, 2003 In that picture, Toby looks like one huge hairy hunk of love. I shed a tear to his memory. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
hooked 0 #23 March 25, 2003 QuoteI have cried harder and mourned more for dogs I have known than for most people I know. I feel bad for anyone who has not known the love and affection of dog. Truly one of God's greatest gifts to us......and undoubtably a burden for the dogs. Do we as humans ever really do them justice? I think quite often that they are the higher life form. How true, how true. Nothing compares to the unconditional love a pet brings to your heart. I will get through the pain and only the memories will remain. Freefallfreak--Your Granddad had great wisdom! Riggerrob--"huge hairy hunk of love" that was Toby! SpeedRacer--Jerry Garcia?? You know, you're right! Brisco--We had Toby for 11 1/2 yrs, I wouldn't want to replace him, couldn't replace him. I just don't want to take on the responsibility of another pet. I wouldn't trade the 11 1/2 yrs we had with him for anything. It was pure joy seeing his smiling face, and he did smile! You people are the absolute best!!!!! J -------------------------------------- Sometimes we're just being Humans.....But we're always Human Beings. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
falxori 0 #24 March 25, 2003 its been a couple of weeks since i've lost my Charley... i've posted the story here awhile ago, its all still too fresh. i still look for him when i get home, still fight the urge to throw a piece of what i'm eating at his direction, and it breaks my heart over and over again to find out he's not there. before he has died, i couldnt imagine getting a new dog, but now, i miss that feeling so much. take your time and mourn, when it feels right, you'll know. a new puppy is not a replacement, its a new puppy. again, i feel your pain. i know it seems as though no one else can know what it feels like and its true. no one beside those who have sadly lost their best friend too O "Carpe diem, quam minimum credula postero." Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
SteveM 0 #25 March 25, 2003 I am so sorry for your loss -- but be happy that you will always carry Toby with you in your heart and just smile when ever you remember him Steve M >^..^for me -- SkyDiving is a life sentence -- for it has saved my life. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
