happythoughts 0 #26 January 3, 2003 "Would you look at my face, Not at my chest! " hmmm... Wouldn't get a lot of eye-to-eye contact with that outfit. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Iezyka 0 #27 January 3, 2003 hmm, I try to figure out what your point is Sonic.. These 50 things you find typical for the women you have met; do you think they are god or bad? Which of them would you like to change if you could? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
IronMike 0 #28 January 3, 2003 I like my coffee like I like my women.... Bitter Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
KawiZX900 0 #29 January 3, 2003 "howling @ moon on the other side of the world" !!!! Accelerate hard to get them looking, then slam on the fronts and rollright beside the car, hanging the back wheel at eye level for a few seconds. Guaranteed reaction- Dave Sonsky Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
KawiZX900 0 #31 January 3, 2003 Call me Kirk, Captain Kirk Accelerate hard to get them looking, then slam on the fronts and rollright beside the car, hanging the back wheel at eye level for a few seconds. Guaranteed reaction- Dave Sonsky Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
lawrocket 3 #32 January 4, 2003 Everyday I give thanks to God I was born a man instead of a broad When Oprah comes on, I turn off the TV I don't shave my legs, I stand up to pee I go to a barber, not a beauty salon Don't pluck out my eyebrows just to draw them back on Don't wax my pubes so I can wear shorts I use my turn signal, I understand sports Man, I'm glad I'm a man, man Tell you the reason I am I don't go through a phase every 28 days Man, I'm glad I'm a man I pay cash at the grocery, no checks or coupons Don't take a lot of friends when I go the the john I don't throw a fit when I break a nail I don't buy a lot of shoes just because they're on sale I don't apply makeup in my rear-view mirror I don't think of Bambi when I'm out hunting deer I drink beer from a bottle, not from a glass I don't ask my friends about the size of my ass Man, I'm glad I'm a man, man Tell you the reason I am I don't face the pain of water-weight gain Man, I'm glad I'm a man Let me tell you ladies Listen to me ladies I love those things inside of your blouse I love your pretty faces Your warm and soft embraces But if I had my own two boobs, I'd never leave the house I don't spend two hours getting ready for a date I don't play with dolls unless they inflate When someone asks me my age, I never lie After sex in bed, my spot's always dry I don't read about orgasms in Vogue magazines I don't mind if my dates try to get in my jeans I don't spend a fortune on French lingerie This is the same underwear I wore yesterday Man, I'm glad I'm a man, man Tell you the reason I am I don't take a pill, I don't use Massengill Man, I'm glad I'm a man Man, I'm glad I'm a man, man Tell you the reason I am I find Michael Bolton completely revoltin' Man, I'm glad I'm a man I didn't write it! - My wife is hotter than your wife. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
happythoughts 0 #33 January 4, 2003 Quote I like my coffee like I like my women.... You like 18 year old coffee? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
jessd 0 #34 January 4, 2003 Nice! Very funny comment! "Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away..." Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Sonic 0 #35 January 4, 2003 I try to figure out what your point is Sonic*** hehe - it's a joke email I got today ----------------------------------- It's like something out of that twilighty show about that zone Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Sonic 0 #36 January 4, 2003 QuoteI like my coffee like I like my women.... In a plastic cup? Covered in bees? Hot and with a spoon in?----------------------------------- It's like something out of that twilighty show about that zone Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Reed78 0 #37 January 4, 2003 I'm new at this site, just came to look around but after I read this I just had to respond. I'm glad I'm a man, you better believe. I don't live off of yogurt, diet coke, or cottage cheese I don't bitch to my girlfriends about the size of my breasts. I can get where I want to - north, south, east or west. I don't get wasted after only 2 beers, And when I do drink I don't end up in tears. I won't spend hours deciding what to wear. I spend 5 minutes max fixing my hair. And I don't go around checking my reflection in everything shiny from every direction. I don't whine in public and make us leave early, And when you ask why get all bitter and surly. I'm glad I'm a man, I'm so glad I could sing. I don't have to sit around waiting for that ring. I don't gossip about friends or stab them in the back. I don't carry our differences into the sack. I'll never go psycho and threaten to kill you Or think every guy out there's trying to steal you. I'm rational, reasonable, and logical too. I know what the time is and I know what to do. And I honestly think its a privilege for me To have these two balls and stand when I pee. I live to watch sports and play all sorts of ball. It's more fun than dealing with women after all. I won't cry if you say it's not going to work. I won't remain bitter and call you a jerk. Feel free to use me for immediate pleasure. I won't assume it's permanent by any measure. Yes, I'm so very glad I'm a man, you see. I'm glad I'm not capable of child delivery. I don't get all bitchy every 28 days. I'm glad that my gender gets me a much bigger raise. I'm a man by chance and I'm thankful it's true. I'm so glad I'm a man and not a woman like you! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Carla80 0 #38 January 4, 2003 There is a womans version to that too, maybe you missed it. I'm glad I'm a woman, yes I am, yes I am. I don't live off of Budweiser, Beer Nuts and Spam. I don't brag to my buddies about my erections. I won't drive to Hell before I ask for directions. I don't get wasted at parties, and act like a clown. And I know how to put that damned toilet seat down! I won't grab your hooters, I won't pinch your butt. My belt buckle's not hidden beneath my beer gut. And I don't go around "re-adjusting" my crotch, or yell like Tarzan when my headboard gets a notch. I don't belch in public, I don't scratch my behind. I'm a woman you see-I'm just not that kind! I'm glad I'm a woman, I'm so glad I could sing. I don't have body hair like shag carpeting. It doesn't grow from my ears or cover my back. When I lean over you can't see 3 inches of crack. And what's on my head doesn't leave with my comb. I'll never buy a toupee to cover my dome. Or have a few hairs pulled from over the side. I'm a woman, you know-I've got far too much pride! And I honestly think its a privilege for me, To have these two boobs and to squat when I pee. I don't live to play golf and shoot basketball. I don't swagger and spit like a Neanderthal. I won't tell you my wife just does not understand, Or stick my hand in my pocket to hide that gold band. Or tell you a story to make you sigh and weep, Then screw you, roll over and fall sound asleep! Yes, I'm so very glad I'm a woman, you see. Forget all about that old penis envy. I don't long for male bonding, I don't cruise for chicks Join the Hair Club For Men, or think with my dick. I'm a woman by chance and I'm thankful, it's true. I'm so glad I'm a woman and not a man like you! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
