christoofar 0 #1 November 15, 2002 This is really hard to say... A couple weeks ago one of my best friends committed suicide. Went to the funeral. Very tough. Today her dad shows up at work and hands me a note she was writing to me. It was just the usual stuff we always write about, what we're up to... what our friends are doing, et al. There wasn't a date on it but it's probably a couple weeks or so ago before she died. I couldn't concentrate at work all day today. Why do people do this shit? ____________________________________________________________ I'm RICK JAMES! Fo shizzle. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
skygirlpc 0 #3 November 15, 2002 I'm very sorry for your loss! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
suz 0 #4 November 15, 2002 (blows lots of kisses) i'm sorry sweetie. my heart cries for you, went through something very similar in may. chin up, go for a jump! then you can be with her........for about 50 secs.. ( gives Christoofar big cuddles) Don't bother me, I'm living happily ever after Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
jtval 0 #5 November 15, 2002 Damn , I know how hard that shit is. I can not even think of any words to explian the dissarray of feelings you/and everyone she was dear to must be feeling! sorry to hear it, brotha!My photos My Videos Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
christoofar 0 #6 November 15, 2002 thanks suz I thought I got over everything after the funeral (I go to a lot of them, I have lots of really old relatives)... but this note is just sitting on my desk and it kind of freaks me out. This is awful, I want to give it back to her parents. ____________________________________________________________ I'm RICK JAMES! Fo shizzle. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
suz 0 #7 November 15, 2002 They obviously wanted you to have it. They came to you at work, to give it to you...so that must mean something, huh? I still cry for my mate alot, although, he's alive. But he's still going through alot of heartache.. hey...he could be reading this. Hey Dan!! love you to bits!!!! Don't bother me, I'm living happily ever after Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
christoofar 0 #8 November 15, 2002 Yeah, I guess that makes sense. ____________________________________________________________ I'm RICK JAMES! Fo shizzle. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Gawain 0 #9 November 15, 2002 Unfortunately, I can relate on several levels to what you're going through. The longest lasting sense I have from these events is still that of utter disbelief. It's sort of like being in a perpetual state of "coming to terms" with the loss. One of the most enduring memories I have is that of a phone call I received from a dear friend of mine two days before she took her life. The reason being was that we were making plans. It still feels like unfinished business, a stranger feeling than any written correspondence I received from others. I'm sorry you have to share in that feeling. So I try and I scream and I beg and I sigh Just to prove I'm alive, and it's alright 'Cause tonight there's a way I'll make light of my treacherous life Make light! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
suz 0 #10 November 15, 2002 this is making me sad. Don't bother me, I'm living happily ever after Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
skybytch 273 #11 November 15, 2002 QuoteWhy do people do this shit? They probably aren't thinking real straight yet either. Perhaps they thought you'd appreciate a last message from her, or maybe they felt a need to connect with one of her best friends and the note was a good excuse to drop by. I've also lost a friend to suicide - in this case suicide by parachute. I know what you're going through - the grief, the anger, the guilt, the memories good and bad - it's so hard to concentrate on anything. You'll have more days like this, guaranteed, but they will be fewer and further between. If you were really close to her you'll probably never get completely over it, but someday you will get to the point where you can think of her, see a picture of her, remember her, or even read that note again and you'll be able to smile instead of wanting to cry. I feel for you, Chris. This is one of the toughest things life can throw at you. Hang in there, and feel free to pm, call or email me if you need to talk to someone who's been there. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
suz 0 #12 November 15, 2002 That's so sweet of you, Skybytch. Your an angel to Christoofar. Don't bother me, I'm living happily ever after Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
blewaway5 0 #13 November 15, 2002 Skybytch is right, my friend. I've lost so many friends, and I'm only 22, that there are moments I just have to pause and wonder what it's all about. One friend death by parachute, one by shotgun, one by hanging. I don't know why people reach a point and decide that death is the better option. Personally it seems that life is the more exciting choice, the choice that has the best chance of success with the least chance of hurting the ones we love. Of course, that doesn't make your life easier after they're gone. For me I had a hard time dealing with the pain and the anger, but after a while the strangest thing started happening. I still hurt when I think about Troy, Mike and Marshal, and I'll always wish they were still a part of my life, but the anger goes away, and the pain fades to a dull ache that is almost covered over by the good memories. Time may be "an old bald cheater," but he's a hell of a doctor, too. Let him work on you. I know it's cliche, but it's been true for me. Truman Sparks for President Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
ChileRelleno 0 #14 November 15, 2002 Vibes<<<<<<<<>>>>>>>>>>>><<<<<<<<<<<<>>>>>>>>>>>><<<<<<<<<>>>>>><<<<<>>>>>><<<<<<<>>>>>>>><<<< lots of good vibes to help with hard times, wish I could do more... <<<<<<<>>>>>><<<<<<>>>>><<<<<<>>>>>>><<<<<<>>>>>>>>><<<<<<<<<>>>>>>>>><<<<<<<>>>>>>>>>>><<<<<<<<<<<>>>>>>>>>>><<<<<<<<<>>>>>>><<<<<<<<>>>>>>><<<<<<>>>>><<<<<>>>>><<<<<<>>>>><<<<<<>>>>>>><<<<<<<>>>>>><<<<<<>>>>>><<<<>>>>><<<<>>>>>> ChileRelleno-Rodriguez Bro#414 Hellfish#511,MuffBro#3532,AnvilBro#9, D24868 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
outofit 0 #15 November 15, 2002 i too can relate on several different scales when it comes to this issue. i am a police officer and it is quite troublesome to have to go to these scenes where someone has taken their own life. for me it makes me appreciate my life more even when i get down. not to mention i had a good friend commit suicide whenever i was in college and it is not an easy thing to deal with. i guess the best advice i can give u is that time heals the wound, it did for me anyway! BSBD It is better to be dead and cool than alive and uncool! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Michele 1 #16 November 15, 2002 Hey, my friend. I have a recent experience with a friend suiciding in late August. The note has got to be really, really tough. If I had the same thing happen, I'd take the note, and tuck it away somewhere safe. Maybe give it to my Dad to hold on to until I could handle it. Then I'd get the grieving thing going - however it works for you. Someday in the future, you will smile when you think of her, you will be amazed at the strength of your memories. And then, when you are ready, you will be able to deal with the note in a manner which brings you the joy she did. Hang in there. And as Lisa said, pm me should you need to talk. Ciels and hugs- Michele ~Do Angels keep the dreams we seek While our hearts lie bleeding?~ Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Rookeskydiver 0 #17 November 15, 2002 Quote ( chin up, go for a jump! then you can be with her........for about 50 secs.. ( gives Christoofar big cuddles) that was amazing. i just love that PCSS # 1 Rookeskydiver "Its a Wonka Bar"....."Go ahead Charlie open it, lets see that golden ticket" Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
suz 0 #18 November 15, 2002 that was amazing. i just love that *** I've gotten that feeling up there...that somebody was near me...but they were more, like, floating around me. I had a feeling it was my nana. Don't bother me, I'm living happily ever after Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Skystorm 0 #19 November 15, 2002 Chris, I know what you're going through. I've lost a friend in the beginning of October. First we were told that he committed suicide, it turned out later that he was murdered.I'm sending good vibes your way. Hang in there. Gene Police: "YOU!! Out of the pool, NOW!!!" Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
AirMail 0 #20 November 15, 2002 Quote that was amazing. i just love that *** I've gotten that feeling up there...that somebody was near me...but they were more, like, floating around me. I had a feeling it was my nana. My Dad is with me on every jump. I have his dogtag and a piece of his parachute from WWII in my pocket.-- It's never too late to have a happy childhood. Postal Rodriguez, Muff 3342 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
JumpNFly 0 #21 November 15, 2002 my heart truly goes out to you. My friend committed suicide when she was 12, I was only about 6... lots and lots of good <<<<>>>> and hugs... hang in there... The key to walking on water... Is knowing where the rocks are Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
