analogies and metaphors...

[skybytch 273]

***Analogies and Metaphors Found in High School Essays

Her face was a perfect oval, like a circle that had its two other sides gently compressed by a Thigh Master.
--Sue Lin Chong, Washington

His thoughts tumbled in his head, making and breaking alliances like underpants in a dryer without Cling Free.
--Chuck Smith, Woodbridge

He spoke with the wisdom that can only come from experience, like a Guy who went blind because he looked at a solar eclipse without one of those boxes with a pinhole in it and now goes around the country speaking at high schools about the dangers of looking at a solar eclipse without one of those boxes with a pinhole in it.
--Joseph Romm, Washington

She caught your eye like one of those pointy hook latches that used to dangle from screen doors and would fly up whenever you banged the door open again.
--Rich Murphy, Fairfax Station

The little boat gently drifted across the pond exactly the way a bowling ball wouldn't.
--Russell Beland, Springfield

McBride fell 12 stories, hitting the pavement like a Hefty bag filled with vegetable soup.
--Paul Sabourin, Silver Spring

Bob was as perplexed as a hacker who means to access
T:flw.quid55328.com\aaakk/ch@u... but gets T:flw.quidaaakk/ch@u... by mistake.
--Ken Krattenmaker, Landover Hills

Her vocabulary was as bad as, you know, like, whatever.
--Unknown

He was as tall as a six-foot-three-inch tree.
--Jack Bross, Chevy Chase

The hailstones leaped from the pavement, just like maggots when you fry them in hot grease.
--Gary F. Hevel, Silver Spring

Long separated by cruel fate, the star-crossed lovers raced across the grassy field toward each other like two trains, one having left Cleveland at 6:36 p.m. traveling at 55 mph, the other from Topeka at 4:19 p.m. at a speed of 35 mph.
--Jennifer Hart, Arlington

The politician was gone but unnoticed, like the period after the Dr. on a Dr Pepper can.
--Wayne Goode, Madison, AL

John and Mary had never met. They were like two hummingbirds who had also never met.
--Russell Beland, Springfield

The thunder was ominous sounding, much like the sound of a thin sheet of metal being shaken backstage during the storm scene in a play.
--Barbara Fetherolf, Alexandria

The red brick wall was the color of a brick-red Crayola crayon.
--Unknown

Even in his last years, Grandpappy had a mind like a steel trap, only one that had been left out so long, it had rusted shut.
-- Sandra Hull, Arlington

The door had been forced, as forced as the dialogue during the interview portion of "Jeopardy! "
--Jean Sorensen, Herndon

Shots rang out, as shots are wont to do.
--Jerry Pannullo, Kensington

The plan was simple, like my brother-in-law Phil. But unlike Phil, this plan just might work.
--Malcolm Fleschner, Arlington

The young fighter had a hungry look, the kind you get from not eating for a while.
--Malcolm Fleschner, Arlington

"Oh, Jason, take me! " she panted, her breasts heaving like a college freshman on $1-a-beer night.
--Bonnie Speary Devore, Gaithersburg

He was as lame as a duck. Not the metaphorical lame duck either, but a real duck that was actually lame. Maybe from stepping on a land mine or something.
--John Kammer, Herndon

Her artistic sense was exquisitely refined, like someone who can tell butter from I Can't Believe It's Not Butter.
--Barbara Collier, Garrett Park

She had a deep, throaty, genuine laugh, like that sound a dog makes just before it throws up.
--Susan Reese, Arlington

It came down the stairs looking very much like something no one had ever seen before.
--Marian Carlsson, Lexington

The knife was as sharp as the tone used by Rep. Sheila Jackson Lee, D-Tex., in her first several points of parliamentary procedure made to Rep. Henry Hyde (R-Ill. )in the House Judiciary Committee hearings on the impeachment of President William Jefferson Clinton.
--J. F. Knowles, Springfield

The ballerina rose gracefully en pointe and extended one slender leg behind her, like a dog at a fire hydrant.
--Jennifer Hart, Arlington

It was an American tradition, like fathers chasing kids around with power tools.
--Brian Broadus, Charlottesville

He was deeply in love. When she spoke, he thought he heard bells, as if she were a garbage truck backing up.
--Susan Reese, Arlington

She was as easy as the "TV Guide" crossword.
--Tom Witte, Gaithersburg

Her eyes were like limpid pools, only they had forgotten to put in any pH cleanser.
--Chuck Smith, Woodbridge

She grew on you like a colony of E. coli on a room-temperature Canadian beef.
--Brian Broadus, Charlottesville

She walked into my office like a centipede with 98 missing legs.
--Jonathan Paul, Garrett Park

Her voice had that tense, grating quality, like a first-generation thermal paper fax machine that needed a band tightened.
--Sue Lin Chong, Washington

It hurt the way your tongue hurts after you accidentally staple it to the wall.
--Brian Broadus

[wlie 0]

He's been programmed to suck up like a Hoover
- Bucky to Sachel of Get Fuzzy comic

My other ride is the relative wind.

[wingnut 0]

these where as funny as the funny stuff people write sometimes.......gona have to copy and paste this to my email....

______________________________________
"i have no reader's digest version"

[AirTime 0]

Too funny.
Ya know some analogies and metaphors and you can technically mean the same thing but get a completely different response.
Tell your Significant Other, "When I look into your face, time seems to stand still" and you’ll get lucky. Tell your Significant Other, "You have a face that could stop a clock" and you’ll find yourself with out a Significant Other.

The Paranoids are after me! The Paranoids are after me!

[kinney29 0]

Quote

He spoke with the wisdom that can only come from experience, like a Guy who went blind because he looked at a solar eclipse without one of those boxes with a pinhole in it and now goes around the country speaking at high schools about the dangers of looking at a solar eclipse without one of those boxes with a pinhole in it.
--Joseph Romm, Washington

It may be because I'm a little inebrieted but that is classic. now I have to go read the rest.

[prepheckt 0]

I'm off like a prom dress....

Unknown..

"Dancing Argentine Tango is like doing calculus with your feet."
-9 toes

[Deuce 1]

When he saw I was wearing new shoes, he painted me into a corner.

[brits17 0]

lmfao!!!! those are great ;) i like your signature... her vocabulary was as bad as you know, like, whatever. c ya!

_______________________
aerialkinetics.com

[quatorze 1]

Quote

It hurt the way your tongue hurts after you accidentally staple it to the wall.

uh.................accidentally.....................?

I'm not afriad of dying, I'm afraid of never really living- Erin Engle

[Rookeskydiver 0]

those quotes just made my day

PCSS # 1 Rookeskydiver
"Its a Wonka Bar"....."Go ahead Charlie open it, lets see that golden ticket"

[SpeedRacer 1]

"Like a midget at a urinal, I knew I had to stay on my toes..."

Leslie Nielsen
Police Story

Speed Racer
--------------------------------------------------

[AggieDave 6]

"Like Clay wearing tall boots in a sheep pasture, I had to get busy..."

"Like a post-whore with out a keyboard, I felt like I was getting no where..."

--"When I die, may I be surrounded by scattered chrome and burning gasoline."

[happythoughts 0]

About a baseball player: "He protects third base like a Mormon girl on prom night."

[DrunkMonkey 0]

"I'm all over that like a Frat Boy on a drunk Chick."

Basic Training: "If I do that, my ass would have more attention than a snitch's on 'OZ'."

-Just my $0.02

[AggieDave 6]

Quote

He protects third base like a Mormon girl on prom night

I'm laughing because I dated a mormon girl for a while, took her to prom in high school...I'm guessing the baseball player must really suck, atleast this is from my experience...

--"When I die, may I be surrounded by scattered chrome and burning gasoline."

[dove 0]

Hehehe! Dave said "suck!"

Fall in dove.

[emartin 0]

From a friend:

Quote

I'm like the fat girl at prom...I'm just happy to be here!

beth

[eeneR 3]

You are out standing in your field.............

Left field that is....

She is not a "Dumb Blonde" - She is a "Light-Haired Detour Off The Information Superhighway."
eeneR
TF#72, FB#4130, Incauto

[jtval 0]

it was so dark i was like a blind man at an orgy, I was gonna have feel my way around

paraphrase leslie neilson

My photos

My Videos

[rgoper 0]

don't know if these were in any high school essays or not, but they should have been, the following are a few of my favorites:

1) "man is the only animal that blushes, or needs to"

Mark Twain

2) "the dogmas of the quiete past are inadequate to the stormy present. the occasion is piled high with difficulty, and we must rise to the occasion. as our case is new, so we must think anew and act anew"

Abraham Lincoln

"a competitive world has two possibilities for you. you can lose or, if you want to win, you can change"

Lester C. Thurow
Former Dean, Sloan School Of Management
Massachusetts Institute Of Technology

"all things are ready. if our minds be so."

William Shakespeare
Author: Henry The Fifth

"all right ladies! off your ass, and on your feet. out of the shade, and in the heat"

Huntis Black
Junior High Football Coach
Giddings, Texas

--Richard--
"We Will Not Be Shaken By Thugs, And Terroist"

[flyhi 24]

He was as nervous as a 12-year-old boy with an untied shoe at a NAMBLA Convention.

Shit happens. And it usually happens because of physics.

[SkyDaemon 0]

A metaphor is like a simile.
Busier than a one legged man in an ass kicking contest.

find / -name jumpers -print; cat jumpers $USER > manifest; cd /dev/airplane; more altitude; make jump; cd /pub; more beer;

[PLFKING 4]

"When in doubt I whip it out,
I got me a rock-and-roll band.
It's a free-for-all."

[Kris 0]

Heh. I've used the "Like a hefty bag full of vegetable soup" analogy during a FJC I taught once.

That was my answer to a really persistant student who wanted to know what would happen if someone hit at terminal. I declined to discuss, but she kept pestering so I dropped that one on her when nobody else was listening. She pretty much shut up and paid attention after that.

Kris

Sky, Muff Bro, Rodriguez Bro, and
Bastion of Purity and Innocence!™

[lippy 918]

"She was sweatin like a blind lesbian in a fish factory"
-A real cool skychick

I got nuthin