Getting ino heaven

[SkydiveMonkey 0]

It was getting a little crowded in Heaven, so God decided to change
the
> admittance policy. The new law was that, in order to get into Heaven,
you
> had to have a really bad day the day you died.
>
> The policy would go into effect at noon the following day. So the next
day
> at 12:01 the first person came to the gates of Heaven.
>
> The angel at the gate, remembering about the new law, promptly asked
the
> man, "Before I can let you in, I need you to tell me about the day you
> died."
>
> "No problem.", said the man. "Well, for some time now, I've thought
my
> wife was having an affair. I believed that each day on her lunch hour,
> she'd bring her lover home to our 25th floor apartment and have sex
with
> him. So today I was going to come home too and catch them.
>
> Well, I got there and busted in and immediately began searching for
this
> guy. My wife was half naked and yelling at me as I searched the entire
> apartment. But, damn it, I couldn't find him!
>
> Just as I was about to give up, I happened to glance out onto the
balcony
> and noticed that there was a man hanging off the edge by his
fingertips!
> The nerve of that guy to think he could hide from me!
>
> Well, I ran out there and promptly stomped on his fingers until he
fell to
> the ground. But, wouldn't you know it, he landed in some bushes that
broke
> his fall, and he didn't die. In a rage I went back inside to get the
> first thing I could get my hands on to throw at him.
>
> And oddly enough, the first thing I could grab was the refrigerator. I
> unplugged it, pushed it out onto the balcony and heaved it over the
side.
> It plummeted 25 stories and crushed him! The excitement of the moment
was
> so great that right after that I had a heart attack and died almost
> instantly."
>
> The angel sat back and thought for a moment. Technically, the guy DID
have
> a bad day, and it WAS a crime of passion, so he announced, "Ok, sir.
> Welcome to the Kingdom of Heaven.", and let him in.
>
> A few seconds later the next guy came up.
>
> "Ok. Here's the rule. Before I can let you in, I need to hear about
the
> day you died."
>
> "Sure thing.", the man replied. "But you're not gonna believe this. I
was
> out on the balcony of my 26th floor apartment doing my daily exercises
> when I got a little carried away and accidentally fell over the side!
>
> Luckily however, I was able to catch myself by my fingertips on the
> balcony directly beneath mine. When all of a sudden this crazy man
comes
> running out of his apartment and starts cussing and stomping on my
> fingers! Well of course I fall. I hit some trees and bushes on the way
> down which broke my fall so I didn't die right away. As I'm laying
there
> face up on the ground, unable to move and in excruciating pain, I see
the
> man push his refrigerator, of all things, over the ledge and it falls
> directly on top of me and kills me!"
>
> The angel is quietly laughing to himself as the man finishes his
story. "I
> could get used to this new policy.", he thinks to himself. "Very
well.",
> the angel announces. "Welcome to the Kingdom of Heaven.", and he lets
the
> man enter.
>
> A few seconds later the third man in line comes up to the gate.
>
> "Tell me about the day you died.", said the angel.
>
> "Ok. Picture this.", says the man. "I'm naked inside a
refrigerator...."

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