Impersonating a skydiver

[narcimund 0]

I got in an online chat about skydiving with a local guy named Mike last night. He's an experienced jumper, told me which local DZs he jumps at, etc. When I sent him a picture he said he recognized me from when I was down there last week. We agreed to carpool today ('cause my car isn't available this weekend, damnit.)

Well, today he was a no-show. When I got a hold of him he told me that he'd twisted up his knee on a jump last week and wasn't feeling like jumping. I got a teensy bit suspicious and asked him some skydiver-y questions. Once I figured out he was a total fraud I started playing with him to see what he'd come up with. Today's online conversation had gems in it like this:

Me: "So what kind of jumping do you do?"
Mike: "Tandems"
Me: "Oh. Are you a student or a tandem master?"
Mike: "Master. I take students up for tandems sometimes. That's how I hurt my knee."
Me: "Oh really? How many jumps do you have? I have about 250."
Mike: "I have about 340. But I don't do tandems much anymore."

Me: "What other kinds of jumping do you do?"
Mike: (Quick, look up a dropzone website and look for different kinds of jumping. Oh, here's one!) ""I do accelerated freefall with some friends."

Me: "What rig do you use?"
MB: "What do you mean?" (pause) "You mean what's the name of my sail? Everyone uses different terms for these things."
Me: "Yeah, different terms. What's the name of your sail? You know, Paracommander? T-10?"
Mike: "It's a Silverstreak. It's made in Germany."
Me: "How interesting. I've never heard of that one. How many cells does it have?"
Mike: "Ten cells." (Quick! find a parachute manufacturer on the web.) "I usually buy my equipment at a place called performance designs."
Me: "They sell the silverstreak?"
Mike: "Yes. it's a division of vengeance. Oh, now that I think of it, the Silverstreak only has 9 cells."

In the end I couldn't hold back any more and I complimented him on how well he was using our terminology. He got terrifically pissed at me for calling him a liar, said he didn't have time to waste on losers like me, and ended the conversation.

The more I look back on it, the more I realize he basically never used a name or technical term until after I did. I was just so pleased to find someone to talk jumping and carpool with that I was completely fooled for a while.

Joke's on me. And I never did find a ride to the DZ.

First Class Citizen Twice Over

[moodyskydiver 0]

Oh well! Stuff like that just happens.Sorry you didnt find a ride though.

"...just an earthbound misfit, I."

[freeflir29 0]

Sounds like Bill Clinton must have moved into your neighborhood.

[SkydiveMonkey 0]

Well my paracommander is a 10 cell airlocked canopy and I can swoop about 500 feet on it !!

____________________
Say no to subliminal messages

[skymut 0]

I ran into a guy like that once. Told me that he was a skydiver. Asked him where he jumped at, and he told me that he had a friend with a plane that would take him and his buddies up whenever they felt like it. Then he proceeded to tell me about how they liked to land on the roof of his house. What I liked the most was how he kept using 'terminology' from movies like Point Break and Drop Zone that did not fit. I figured that he was making a jack ass out of himself enough, nodded my head, and went on my way.

Matt
A well-informed person is somebody who has the same views and opinions as yours.

[MarkM 0]

I never got why people lie about their personal lives. I mean, the only person ever really that interested in yourself is you, so why do you need to lie about who you are?

I guess I'm naive.

[slotperfect 7]

Funny stuff! I run into people like that on occasion that make an effort to dazzle me with their impressive military career, especially combat stories. I usually don't engage the suspicious ones in conversation, choosing instead to "break contact."

Arrive Safely

John

[thrillseek 0]

I just got my new 11 cell high power sail in the mail today from Sails Unlimited (french company--very obscure!)...i'm thinking about base jumping it from my neighbor's 3 story roof. Ha ha ha

Some people are too stupid to realize that they are in over their heads.

[freeflir29 0]

Quote

I run into people like that on occasion that make an effort to dazzle me with their impressive military career, especially combat stories

There I was, there I was, there I was.....In the Congo......

[VectorBoy 0]

I run into a lot of people like that. They are pilots with extreme credentials. Para-rescue or spec ops etc with wild jumps and water infiltrate tales. Some liar loozers you can walk away from if in public but thats not allways the case. Two perticular bad boys from work had everybody fooled, they were the HEROS and I couldn't escape. One was so bad at an airshow we attended that he turned off a helo pilot
I was trying hard to smooze a ride in, so bad that the pilot wouldn't even talk to us anymore. An idea hit me while trying to find old pilot buddies on the Airmens medical web search. If you're a civilain pilot you have a medical cert right?Two seconds to find out on the net. If you were air force para-rescue you can tell me the size and color of the wind tunnel at yuma that EVERBODY goes through (gotcha). But if you were a Navy seal and you can't remember your military ID was DD form xxx you are definately busted. Remember that fruad that was doing some talk show and charity circuit a few years ago viet namm green beret this medal of honor winner that, until someone looked it up, he had the whole country fooled. Shame, shame and I have the perfect punishment. A couple of hours forced PT with some of our countrys SILENT proffesionals all on video.

[freeflir29 0]

People telling fake military stories are usually pretty easy to bust out. Every school keeps class rosters. SEALS, PJ, CCT, ROMADs, SF...blah blah blah. In fact....I was doing a phone interview a while back and the guy asked me if I had been in "Special Ops" I said...well...I was never "owned" by any Spec Ops command but I have done ops with just about everybody out there. So I hate to attach that word to my job in the Air Force. Don't wanna come off as a 6 beer hero. The guy immediately had lots of respect for me and proceeded to tell me the story of a guy he had just fired. Seems this guy was telling everyone how he had been a "Delta Door Kicker" Well...he did some checking with people and found out that the guy had indeed "worked with" them. Well...in a support role. If you have ever been around any of those folks there is a HUGE difference between the Silver coin people and the GOLD coin people... I don't know how an SF guy got that far if he was the type to go telling tales. It certainly bit him in the ass and he is DONE....and I do mean will never work again in the security industry. I seem to get lots of respect out of people for telling them the truth. I don't know why someone would feel the need to lie.

[mouth 0]

Anybody remember Spectre 230????

--
Hot Mama
At least you know where you stand even if it is in a pile of shit.

[howardwhite 6]

If you're interested in the psychology of people claiming what they're not in skydiving....

http://www.cyberis.net/~jouster/

Read the 100+ page report about Jim Campbell. Or just skim it -- you'll get the idea.

HW
(he'll probably sue me for $5 million again)

[jtval 0]

Sounds like Bill Clinton must have moved into your neighborhood.

yea
"What rig do you use?"
well that depends on what you mean by "RIG"

I never got why people lie about their personal lives. I mean, the only person ever really that interested in yourself is you, so why do you need to lie about who you are?

b/c they are just losers and cant keep themselves interested in "themselves" either.

some folks! HUH! they really have no clue!

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