0
lummy

Something to Offend everyone

Recommended Posts

Q. What's the Cuban national anthem?
A. Row, Row, Row Your Boat


Q. Where does an Irish family go on vacation?
A. A different bar


Q. What did the Chinese couple name their retarded baby?
A. Sum Ting Wong


Q. What do you call it when an Italian has one arm shorter than the other?
A. A speech impediment


Q. What does it mean when the Post Office's flag is flying at half-mast?
A. They're hiring


Q. Why aren't there any Puerto Ricans on Star Trek?
A. Because they're not going to work in the future either.


Q. What do you call a Mississippi farmer with a sheep under each arm?
A. A pimp.


Q. Why do Driver Education classes in redneck schools use the car Only on Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays?
A. Because on Tuesday and Thursday, the Sex Ed class uses it.
Q. What's the difference between a southern zoo and a northern zoo?
A. The southern zoo has a description of the animal on the front of the cage along with a recipe.


Q. How do you get a sweet little 80-year-old lady to say the "F" word?
A. Get another sweet little 80-year-old lady to yell "BINGO!"


Q. What's the difference between a northern fairytale and a Southern fairytale?
A. A northern fairytale begins, "Once upon a time..." and a Southern fairytale begins, "Y'all ain't gonna believe this shit."


Q. Why doesn't Mexico have an Olympic team?
A. Because all the Mexicans who can run, jump or swim are already In the United States.
One shot... HEY!!! Mas Tequila!!!! Two Shots HEY HEY!!!! Three Shots.......

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
As long as we're offending people, this should cover a couple of different groups:
A dad walks into a market with his young son. The kid is holding a quarter.
Suddenly, the boy starts choking, going blue in the face. The dad realizes
the boy has swallowed the quarter and starts panicking, shouting for help.
A well dressed, attractive, but serious looking woman in a blue business
suit is sitting at a coffee bar in the market reading he newspaper and
sipping a cup of coffee.
At the sound of the commotion, she looks up, puts her coffee cup down on the
saucer, neatly folds her newspaper and places it on the counter.
Then she gets up from her seat and makes her way unhurried, across the
market.
Reaching the boy, the woman carefully takes hold of the boy's testicles and
starts to squeeze, gently at first and then ever more firmly.
After a few seconds the boy convulses violently and coughs up the quarter,
which the woman deftly catches in her free hand.
Releasing the boy, the woman hands the coin to the father and walks back to
her seat in the coffee bar without saying a word.
As soon as he is sure that his son has suffered no lasting ill effects, the
father rushes over to the woman and starts thanking her saying, "I've never
seen anybody do anything like that before. It was fantastic. Are you a
doctor?"
"No," she says. "Divorce attorney.":P
flyhiB|

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
I am very offended! you must be drunker than an Indian on payday to post something like this! It is stereotypes like these that really hurt Americans of all skin color and ethnic group like darkies; fags; nips; ragheads; bluehairs; wetbacks;and brits. I bet you think that just because all female pro golfers are lesbians, that all the ones at your local course are too! Just because all Brits have bad teeth doesnt mean they are bad people. Just because all the silly French people smell does not make them stupid! Just because all Canadians are inbred doesnt make them sexually undesireable! You are probably one of those people that actually believe the Holocaust really happened!
Dick

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Q.how do you tell the Groom at an italian wedding?
A.he's the one wearing the cleanest undershirt!
-------------------------------------------------------------------
Q. what do you call a bus full of (add-ethnic group o fyou disliking here) going over a cliff?

A. A good start
-------------------------------------------------------------------
Q. what do you call a buss full of (add same group) with one empty seat going over a cliff?
A. a Damn shame!
:)Have fun, Live free, SKYDIVE!!T
http://community.webshots.com/user/jtval100

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.
Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

0