Made me giggle

[dove 0]

Insert your favorite enemy's name for "blonde"...
EXPOSURE
A blonde is walking down the street with her blouse open and her right breast hanging out. A policeman approaches her and says, "Ma'am, are you aware that I could cite you for indecent exposure?" She says, "Why, officer?" "Because your breast is hanging out." She looks down and says, "OH MY GOD, I left the baby on the bus again!"
DIETING
A blonde is overweight, so her doctor puts her on a diet. I want you to eat regularly for two days, then skip a day, and repeat this procedure for two weeks. The next time I see you, you'll have lost at least five pounds." When the blonde returns, she's lost nearly 20 pounds. "Why, that's amazing!" the doctor says. "Did you follow my instructions?" The blonde nods. "I'll tell you, though, I thought I was going to drop dead that third day." "From hunger, you mean?" asked the doctor. "No, from all that skipping."
RIVER
There's this blonde out for a walk. She comes to a river and sees another blonde on the opposite bank. "Yoo-hoo" she shouts, "how can I get to the other side?" The second blonde looks up the river then down the river then shouts back, "You are on the other side."
PULL OVER!
A highway patrolman pulled alongside a speeding car on the freeway. Glancing at the car, he was astounded to see that the blonde behind the wheel was knitting! Realizing that she was oblivious to his flashing lights and siren, the trooper cranked down his window, turned on his bullhorn and yelled, "PULLOVER!" "NO," the blonde yelled back, "IT'S A SCARF!"
THE SUN
A Russian, an American, and a Blonde were talking one day. The Russian said, "We were the first in space!" The American said, "We were the first on the moon!" The Blonde said, "So what, we're going to be the first on the sun!" The Russian and the American looked at each other and shook their heads. "You can't land on the sun, you idiot! You'll burn up!" said the Russian. To which the Blonde replied, "We're not stupid, you know. We're going at night!"
SPEEDING TICKET
A police officer stops a blonde for speeding and asks her very nicely if he could see her license. She replied in a huff, "I wish you guys would get your act together. Just yesterday you take away my license and then today you expect me to show it to you!"
VACUUM
A blonde was playing Trivial Pursuit one night. It was her turn. She rolled the dice and she landed on "Science & Nature." Her question was, "If you are in a vacuum and someone calls your name, can you hear it?" She thought for a time and then asked, "Is it on or off?"
FINAL EXAM
The blonde reported for her university final examination that consists of "yes/no" type questions. She takes her seat in the examination hall, stares at the question paper for five minutes, and then in a fit of inspiration takes her purse out, removes a coin and starts tossing the coin and marking the answer sheet "Yes" for Heads and "No" for Tails. Within half an hour she is all done, whereas the rest of the class is sweating it out. During the last few minutes, she is seen desperately throwing the coin, muttering and sweating. The moderator, alarmed, approaches her and asks what is going on. "I finished the exam in half an hour, but I'm rechecking my answers."
RANSOM
There was a blonde woman who was having financial troubles so she decided to kidnap a child and demand a ransom. She went to a local park, grabbed a little boy, took him behind a tree and wrote this note. "I have kidnapped your child. Leave $10,000 in a plain brown bag behind the big oak tree in the park tomorrow at 7 A.M. Signed, The Blonde" She pinned the note inside the little boy's jacket and told him to go straight home. The next morning, she returned to the park to find the $10,000 in a brown bag, behind the big oak tree, just as she had instructed. Inside the bag was the following note... "Here is your money. I cannot believe that one blonde would do this to another!"

[ChromeBoy 0]

You did make me giggle Dove now am going to make you wiggle! Come here and lay on top of me since you can walk now and start wiggling.

[ChromeBoy 0]

Dove's the Sweetist Thing
My Dove she throws me like a rubber ball
Oh oh oh, the sweetest thing
She won't catch me or break my fall
Oh oh oh, the sweetest thing
Baby's got blue skies up ahead
But in this I'm a rain cloud
You know she likes a dry kind of love
Oh oh oh, the sweetest thing
I'm losing you
Hey hey hey, I'm losing you yeah
Ain't Dove the sweetest thing
I wanted to run but she made me crawl
Oh oh oh, the sweetest thing
Eternal fire, she turned me to straw
Oh oh, the sweetest thing
You know I got black eyes
But they burn so brightly for her
Mine is a blind kind of love
Oh oh oh, the sweetest thing
I'm losing you
Oh oh oh, I'm losing you yeah
Ain't love the sweetest thing
Oh oh oh, the sweetest thing
Oh oh, yeah
Blue-eyed boy meets a brown-eyed girl
Oh oh oh, the sweetest thing
You can sew it up but you still see the tear
Oh oh oh, the sweetest thing
Baby's got blue skies up ahead
And in this I'm a rain cloud
You know we got a stormy kind of love
Oh oh oh, the sweetest thing
Oh oh, the sweetest thing
Oh oh oh, the sweetest thing
Oh oh oh, the sweetest thing

[TEB6363 0]

Very Funny, LOL.
Now, Dove Giggling[drool]thinking of Dove's giggle[drool].
:::OK, Canopy is Open, No Traffic Around, .. Why are these "Extra" Lines Draping Down??, Damn!

[kingbunky 3]

A drunk walks out of a bar with a key in his hand and he is stumbling back and forth. A cop on the beat sees him and approaches. "Can I help you sir?"
"Yessh! Ssssombody stole my car" the man replies.
The cop asks- "Where was your car the last time you saw it?"
"It wasss at the end of thiss key" the man replies.
About that time the cop looks down and sees the man's weiner is hanging out of his fly for all the world to see.
He asks the man "Sir are you aware that you are exposing yourself?"
Momentarily confused, the drunk looks down at his crotch and, without missing a beat, blurts out-
"SON OF A BITCH ----- THEY GOT MY GIRLFRIEND, TOO!!!!!"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
bunky
get crazy, before it gets you.

[coconutmonkey 0]

A cop is watching a local watering hole waiting to catch a drunk driver.
A few minutes before closing time, a man stumbles out of the bar. He bumps into his car, fumbles for his keys, drops them, fumbles about on his knees to find them, opens the car, starts it and drives away.
The cop follows for a several mile waiting for the driver to begin to swerve or speed away, but the driver holds steady. Finally, frustrated, the cop hits the lights and pulls the driver over. After an exhaustive roadside sobriety test, the driver seems to be completely sober.
Cop,"Hey, I saw you staggering about the bar in a stupor and now your fine. What happened?"
Driver,"We saw you waiting outside the bar and I volenteered to be the DD tonight."
Cop,"Designated Driver? You haven't anyone else in the car."
Driver,"Naw, I'm the Designated Decoy."

[dove 0]

Awwwwww, you gettin' sweet on me Chromie?!
dove

[ChromeBoy 0]

I've always been sweet for you Dove. Your sweet like a Dove bar! My favorite ice cream. I like it when Dove melts in my mouth and runs down my lips and I have to wipe my chin off because of the sweet juices. I could eat Doves' all night long.