Insults for all nationalities

[R00tj00se 0]

TOP 10 REASONS FOR ENJOYING BEING AUSTRALIAN:
> ------------------------------------------------------------------
> 1. Know your great-grand-dad was a murdering bastard that no civilised
> nation on earth wanted.
> 2. Fosters Lager
> 3. Dispossess Aborigines who have lived in your country for 40,000 years
> because you think it belongs to you.
> 4. Cricket captain not afraid to cry live on TV.
> 5. Tact and sensitivity.
> 6. Bondi Beach.
> 7. Other beaches.
> 8. Liberated attitude to homosexuals
> 9. Drinking cold lager on the beach
> 10. Being part of the commonwealth, and having the Queen as your
> figurehead.
>
>
> TOP 10 REASONS FOR ENJOYING BEING A NEW ZEALANDER:
> ------------------------------------------------------------------
> 1. Being very fond of your sheep
> 2. Being very fond of everybody else's sheep
> 3. Free access to Australian social security
> 4. The ability to run a civilised society without the need for electricity
> 5. The Americas Cup
> 6. You can stick your tongue out at the Queen and not be beheaded
> 7. Everybody looks good in black
> 8. The haaka
> 9. The hungi
> 10. Get to annoy the English-speaking world just by saying a few
> well-chosen words like "sux" (six), "emejun" (imagine), and "fush and
> chups" (fish and chips)
>
>
> TOP 10 REASONS FOR ENJOYING BEING FRENCH :
> ------------------------------------------------------------------
> 1. When speaking fast you can make yourself sound gay
> 2. Experience the joy of winning the world cup for the first time.
> 3. You get to eat insect food like snails and frog's legs
> 4. If there's a war you can surrender really early
> 5. You don't have to read the subtitles on those late night films on
> Channel 4 .
> 7. You can be ugly and still become a famous film star
> 8. Allow Germans to march up and down your most famous street humiliating
> your sense of national pride
> 9. You don't have to bother with toilets, just shit in the street .
> 10. People think you're a great lover even when you're not
>
>
> TOP 10 REASONS FOR ENJOYING BEING AMERICAN :
> ------------------------------------------------------------------
> 1. You can have a woman president without electing her
> 2. You can spell colour wrong and get away with it
> 3. You can call Budweiser beer
> 4. You can be a crook and still be president
> 5. If you've got enough money you can get elected to do anything
> 6. If you can breathe you can get a gun
> 7. You get to be really obese
> 8. You can play golf in the most hideous clothes ever made and nobody
seems
> to care.
> 9. You get to call everyone you've never met "buddy"
> 10. You can think you're the greatest nation on earth.
> 10a. When you're not.
> 10b. At all.
>
>
> TOP 10 REASONS FOR ENJOYING BEING ENGLISH
> ------------------------------------------------------------------
> 1. Two World Wars and One World Cup doo-dah doo-dah
> 2. Proper beer
> 3. You get to confuse everyone with the rules of cricket
> 4. You get to accept defeat graciously in major sporting events
> 5. Union jack underpants
> 6. Water shortages guaranteed every single summer
> 7. You can live in the past and imagine you are still a world power.
> 8. Late night drinking (is it 11 already??)
> 9. Johnny Foreigner doesn't invade beaches in summer
> 10. Beats being Welsh.
> 10a. Or Scottish
>
>
> TOP 10 REASONS FOR ENJOYING BEING ITALIAN
> ------------------------------------------------------------------
> 1. In-depth knowledge of bizarre pasta shapes
> 2. Unembarrassed to wear fur.
> 3. No need to worry about tax returns
> 4. Glorious military history prior to 400 a.d.
> 5. Can wear sunglasses inside
> 6. Political stability
> 7. Flexible working hours
> 8. Live near the Pope
> 9. Can spend hours braiding girlfriend's armpit hair
> 10. Country run by Sicilian murderers
>
>
> TOP 10 REASONS FOR ENJOYING BEING SPANISH :
> ------------------------------------------------------------------
> 1. Glorious history of killing South American tribes
> 2. The rest of Europe thinks Africa begins at the Pyrenees
> 3. You get your beaches invaded by Germans, Danes, Brits etc
> 4. The rest of your country is already invaded by Moroccans
> 5. Everybody else makes crap paella and claims it's the real thing
> 6. Honesty
> 7. Only sure way of bedding a woman is to dress up in stupid, tight
clothes
> and risk your life in front of bulls
> 8. You get to eat bulls' testicles
> 9. Gibraltar
> 10. Supported Argentina in Falklands War.
>
>
> TOP 10 REASONS FOR ENJOYING BEING GERMAN :
> ------------------------------------------------------------------
> 1.
> 2.
> 3.
> 4.
> 5.
> 6.
> 7.
> 8.
> 9.
> 10.
>
>
> TOP 10 REASONS FOR ENJOYING BEING INDIAN :
> ------------------------------------------------------------------
> 1. Chicken Madras
> 2. Lamb Passanda
> 3. Onion Bhaji
> 4. Bombay Potato
> 5. Chicken Tikka Masala
> 6. Rogan Josh
> 7. Popadoms
> 8. Chicken Dopiaza
> 9. Meat Boona
> 10. Kingfisher lager
>
>
> TOP 10 REASONS FOR ENJOYING BEING WELSH:
> ------------------------------------------------------------------
> 1. You've got to be having a laugh, haven't you?
>
>
> TOP 10 REASONS FOR ENJOYING BEING IRISH :
> ------------------------------------------------------------------
> 1. Guinness
> 2. 18 children because you can't use contraceptives
> 3. You can get into a fight just by marching down someone's road
> 4. Pubs never close
> 5. Can use Papal edicts on contraception passed in the second Vatican
> Council of 1968 to persuade your girlfriend that you can't have sex with a
> condom on.
> 6. No one can ever remember the night before
> 7. Kill people you don't agree with
> 8. Stew
> 9. More Guinness
> 10. Eating stew and drinking Guinness in an Irish pub at 3 in the morning
> after a bout of sectarian violence.
>
>
> TOP 10 REASONS FOR ENJOYING BEING CANADIAN
> ------------------------------------------------------------------
> 1. It beats being an American.
> 2. Only country to successfully invade the US and burn its capital to the
> ground.
> 3. You can play hockey 12 months a year, outdoors.
> 4. Only country to successfully invade the US and burn its capital to the
> ground.
> 5. Where else can you travel 1000 miles over fresh water in a canoe?
> 6. A political leader can admit to smoking pot and his/her popularity
> ratings will rise.
> 7. Only country to successfully invade the US and burn its capital to the
> ground.
> 8. Kill Grizzly bears with huge fuckoff shotguns and cover your house in
> their skins.
> 9. Own-an-Eskimo scheme.
> 10. Only country to successfully invade the US and burn its capital to the
> ground.

[freeflir29 0]

"1. You can have a woman president without electing her
> 2. You can spell colour wrong and get away with it
> 3. You can call Budweiser beer
> 4. You can be a crook and still be president
> 5. If you've got enough money you can get elected to do anything
> 6. If you can breathe you can get a gun
> 7. You get to be really obese
> 8. You can play golf in the most hideous clothes ever made and nobody
seems
> to care.
> 9. You get to call everyone you've never met "buddy"
> 10. You can think you're the greatest nation on earth.
> 10a. When you're not.
> 10b. At all."
You forgot one.....Being able to tell the rest of the world to fuck off cause we have the finest military in the world.
"I used to know a girl...She had two pirced nipples and a black tattoo"-Everclear
Clay

[SkydiveMonkey 0]

  Quote

You forgot one.....Being able to tell the rest of the world to fuck off cause we have the finest military in the world

Nah, you just have the biggest cos you have more money to spend Don't pull low, unless you are
Alex@SkydiveUPSC.com

[freeflir29 0]

"Nah, you just have the biggest cos you have more money to spend "
OK....but either way the former statement works...LOL
I got double insulted on this post. I'm an American with strong German roots.....
"I used to know a girl...She had two pirced nipples and a black tattoo"-Everclear
Clay

[chicagoskydiver 0]

1. You can have a woman president without electing her
> 2. You can spell colour wrong and get away with it
> 3. You can call Budweiser beer
> 4. You can be a crook and still be president
> 5. If you've got enough money you can get elected to do anything
> 6. If you can breathe you can get a gun
> 7. You get to be really obese
> 8. You can play golf in the most hideous clothes ever made and nobody
seems
> to care.
> 9. You get to call everyone you've never met "buddy"
> 10. You can think you're the greatest nation on earth.
> 10a. When you're not.
> 10b. At all."
You forgot one.....Being able to tell the rest of the world to fuck off cause we have the finest military in the world.
How about this one....
Being expected by the rest of the world to be the world's police force, at taxpayer expense, and then being hated for doing it. Do nothing, and get criticized. Do something, and someone always gets pissed off. It's a no win situation.
Hackey

[SkydiveMonkey 0]

  Quote

I got double insulted on this post. I'm an American with strong German roots.....

I haven't got anything bad to say about anyone anyway - each nationality is ''different''. At least we've got the common sense to jump out of planes !!! Don't pull low, unless you are
Alex@SkydiveUPSC.com

[freaksister 0]

Chicago's right on that one! Good point, BUDDY!
Sis
Before you judge me, take a look at you...

[flyhi 24]

  Quote

> TOP 10 REASONS FOR ENJOYING BEING ITALIAN
> ------------------------------------------------------------------
> 1. In-depth knowledge of bizarre pasta shapes
> 2. Unembarrassed to wear fur.
> 3. No need to worry about tax returns
> 4. Glorious military history prior to 400 a.d.
> 5. Can wear sunglasses inside
> 6. Political stability
> 7. Flexible working hours
> 8. Live near the Pope
> 9. Can spend hours braiding girlfriend's armpit hair
> 10. Country run by Sicilian murderers

Forgot one: You can grow a mustache and you'll look more like your mother.
Mange!!

[freeflir29 0]

"Being expected by the rest of the world to be the world's police force, at taxpayer expense, and then being hated for doing it"
One of the 4332 reasons I'm no longer in the US Military.
"I used to know a girl...She had two pirced nipples and a black tattoo"-Everclear
Clay

[FallinWoman 1]

When the hell did CANADA invade the US???

[freeflir29 0]

"When the hell did CANADA invade the US???"
and no one mentioned our public school systems......till now.....LMAO
"I used to know a girl...She had two pirced nipples and a black tattoo"-Everclear
Clay

[FallinWoman 1]

It is not a reflection on our public school system...The reason we were not taught about Canada invading the US is that it never happened.

[Slappie 9]

"When the hell did CANADA invade the US???"
I thought Texas was taken over the free world, we do have Dubya in the Oval ya know!
Gota jump baybay!! Blue Skies!

[freeflir29 0]

"Canada invading the US is that it never happened"
I'm not a historian but I seem to remember something about the "War of 1812" I think it was. Believe it was more French (Quebec) than Canadians per se??? Am I right?
"I used to know a girl...She had two pirced nipples and a black tattoo"-Everclear
Clay

[chicagoskydiver 0]

Canada invading the U.S.? I must have been absent the day they brought that up in history class.....or maybe it happened on the TV show "South Park"?
Hackey

[FallinWoman 1]

Actually it was the British whom we were fighting in the war of 1812. They did successfully invade and burn the Capitol in 1814.
So, the bragging rights for the only country to invade the United States and burn the Capitol go to the UK, NOT TO CANADA.
CANADA and the US have never been at war with each other.

[mountainman 0]

  Quote

So, the bragging rights for the only country to invade the United States and burn the Capitol go to the UK, NOT TO CANADA

BUHHAHAHA!!! Bragging rights to the UK over US?? I think not. I seem to remember that the UK lost some sort of war and a WHOLE DAMN COUNTRY with it.
Oh yeah......we kicked their asses in the 1700's and became our own country. Hahah......"the redcoats".
--------------
Our website...updated daily

[Iflyme 0]

  Quote

CANADA and the US have never been at war with each other.

Probably because 3 American attempts to invade Canada in 1812 failed!!!

[SpeedRacer 1]

It was the British who burned the White House down in 1814.
But then in January of 1815 there was that little Battle in New Orleans, in which the Yanks fired from trenches at the Brits. Meanwhile the Brits, outnumbering the Yanks two-to-one, used their old traditional battle tactic of proudly marching in formation across an open field wearing bright red coats.
British casualties: Over 700 dead, over 1000 wounded.
American casualties: 8 dead. 13 wounded
Too bad the peace treaty, the Treaty of Ghent, had already been signed before the battle was fought, and both sides just hadn't heard the news yet!!
Speed Racer
"Come up to my lab,
And see what's on the slab!"

[freeflir29 0]

"Probably because 3 American attempts to invade Canada in 1812 failed"
And the outcome today would be? Besides what does Canada have that America wants........Ummmm...all the hotties in Kingston and Molsen XXX. You guys can keep the nasty overpriced smokes.
"I used to know a girl...She had two pierced nipples and a black tattoo"-Everclear
Clay

[spectre230 0]

[SpeedRacer 1]

Incidentally, America invaded Canada against British troops in Canada. So it was America vs. Britain. And the Brits won that one, under the command of General Isaac Brock. Canada didn't become an independent nation until 1867.
Speed Racer
"Come up to my lab,
And see what's on the slab!"

[SpeedRacer 1]

CANADA INVADED BY AMISH!!
http://sonoguy.tripod.com/canada.html
(Hey, sangiro, your URL link markup doesn't work, whether or not I leave out the "http://" bit.)
Speed Racer
"Come up to my lab,
And see what's on the slab!"

[freeflir29 0]

Speedracer (dancing around in front of his computer)
I....... am History Man! I am so smart "smrt" I mean "sm A rt" I am so smart........
What are you? A college student? LMAO
"I used to know a girl...She had two pierced nipples and a black tattoo"-Everclear
Clay

[Snowflake 0]

Ok I noticed that all insults were directed at all the countrys except the UK. Well MR you'dbespeakingermanifitwasn'tforus. You make fun of our president but is that any worse then being in love with a bunch of inbred snobs who can't wipe their own ass's call themselves royalty, and do nothing more then sit around looking silly and pontificating about color Vs colour. We are the greatest nation on this planet you know this to be true but like most people in the UK you stick your head in the sand to avoid the truth (We kicked your smarmy uptight ass's outta this country over 200 years ago and we'd be more then happy to do it again...hell Texas alone would be more then happy to do it and you know we could). You talk about our clothes? This from the country that brought us punk wtf have you been smoking. No we don't call everyone buddy you silly twit in someplaces it's buddy others it may be dude, Bubba or a host of other names why, because were friendly, unless provoked (ya'll are so uptight if we stuck coal up your ass it would turn into diamonds). Yes almost anyone can have a gun here so just bring your holigan ass's over here and try that soccor riot crap and see what happens. On the beer thing well 1 out of 10 is about par for someone from the UK. with that being said go stick your head in the lou and flush repeatedly.
Why hate someone for their race, creed, or color when you can get to know them and hate them for a good reason. Unless their from Kennesaw Georgia and make jokes about Texas in which case hate away
JG