c-130 into Baghdad

[SkyDekker 1,465]

I thought some of you might get a kick out of this little piece of writing. don't know if it has any truth to it, but it sure is funny.

Quote

There I was at six thousand feet over central Iraq, two hundred eighty knots and we're dropping faster than Paris Hilton's panties. It's a typical September evening in the Persian Gulf; hotter than a rectal thermometer and I'm sweating like a priest at a Cub Scout meeting. But that's neither here nor there. The night is moonless over Baghdad tonight, and blacker than a Steven King novel. But it's 2004, folks, and I'm sporting the latest in night-combat technology - namely, hand-me-down night vision goggles (NVGs) thrown out by the fighter boys.


Additionally, my 1962 Lockheed C-130E Hercules is equipped with an obsolete, yet, semi-effective missile warning system (MWS). The MWS conveniently makes a nice soothing tone in your headset just before the missile explodes into your airplane. Who says you can't polish a turd?


At any rate, the NVGs are illuminating Baghdad International Airport like the Las Vegas Strip during a Mike Tyson fight. These NVGs are the cat's ass. But I've digressed.


The preferred method of approach tonight is the random shallow. This tactical manoeuvre allows the pilot to ingress the landing zone in an unpredictable manner, thus exploiting the supposedly secured perimeter of the airfield in an attempt to avoid enemy surface-to-air-missiles and small arms fire. Personally, I wouldn't bet my pink ass on that theory but the approach is fun as hell and that's the real reason we fly it.


We get a visual on the runway at three miles out, drop down to one thousand feet above the ground, still maintaining two hundred eighty knots. Now the fun starts. It's pilot appreciation time as I descend the mighty Herk to six hundred feet and smoothly, yet very deliberately, yank into a sixty degree left bank, turning the aircraft ninety degrees offset from runway heading. As soon as we roll out of the turn, I reverse turn to the right a full two hundred seventy degrees in order to roll out aligned with the runway. Some aeronautical genius coined this manoeuvre the "Ninety/Two-Seventy." Chopping the power during the turn, I pull back on the yoke just to the point my nether regions start to sag, bleeding off energy in order to configure the pig for landing.


"Flaps Fifty!, Landing Gear Down!, Before Landing Checklist!" I look over at the co-pilot and he's shaking like a cat shitting on a sheet of ice. Looking further back at the navigator, and even through the NVGs, I can clearly see the wet spot spreading around his crotch. Finally, I glance at my steely-eyed flight engineer. His eyebrows rise in unison as a grin forms on his face. I can tell he's thinking the same thing I am.... "Where do we find such fine young men?"


"Flaps One Hundred!" I bark at the shaking cat. Now it's all aimpoint and airspeed. Aviation 101, with the exception there are no lights, I'm on NVGs, it's Baghdad, and now tracers are starting to crisscross the black sky. Naturally, and not at all surprisingly, I grease the Goodyear's on brick-one of runway 33 left, bring the throttles to ground idle and then force the props to full reverse pitch. Tonight, the sound of freedom is my four Hamilton Standard propellers chewing through the thick, putrid, Baghdad air. The huge, one hundred thirty thousand pound, lumbering whisper pig comes to a lurching stop in less than two thousand feet. Let's see a Viper do that!


We exit the runway to a welcoming committee of government issued Army grunts. It's time to download their beans and bullets and letters from their sweethearts, look for war booty, and of course, urinate on Saddam's home. Walking down the crew entry steps with my lowest-bidder, Beretta 92F, 9 millimetre strapped smartly to my side, look around and thank God, not Allah, I'm an American and I'm on the winning team. Then I thank God I'm not in the Army. Knowing once again I've cheated death, I ask myself, "What in the hell am I doing in this mess?" Is it Duty, Honor, and Country? You bet your ass. Or could it possibly be for the glory, the swag, and not to mention, chicks dig the Air Medal. There's probably some truth there too. But now is not the time to derive the complexities of the superior, cerebral properties of the human portion of the aviator-man-machine model. It is however, time to get out of this shit-hole. "Hey copilot, clean yourself up! And how's 'bout the 'Before Starting Engines Checklist.'"

God, I love this job!

[LouDiamond 1]

BWWWWAHAAAAHHHHHHH, That is the biggest load of crap I have read lately but it made me laugh and I'm sure it will make the REAL HERC pilots and other guys who fly laugh and roll their eyes. Talk about creative writing, you'd think he was flying a fighter for christs sake. Pure drivel in reality but it would sound good in a B movie or equivilent paperback. LOL The pilots are really gonna get a kick out of this...I can see some e-mail hijinx in the making.


Thanks for the laugh

"It's just skydiving..additional drama is not required"
Some people dream about flying, I live my dream
SKYMONKEY PUBLISHING

[slug 1]

Some very creative writeing and use of the english language. Probably all writes for penthouse.

for the real deal on c-130's check out

http://www.spectrumwd.com/c130/

Lot's of pic's, listing of C-130 lost, how and why, just the facts, no stars and strips cowboy pr stuff. Blind Bat missions over laos looking for targets on the Ho chi min trail going to work every other night. Khe San etc.

Not much glamour just a job, but a lot better than a job in the jungle or in the sand.

R.i.P.

[rhino 0]

Awesome! I actually read the whole thing

[slug 1]

Wisconsin soldiers' flight home becomes perilous journey
Enemy fire strikes plane, knocking out engine
Me thinks this is more real world C-130 stuff in the Sand Box. Just pros doing their job.

By MEG JONES
mjones@journalsentinel.com
Posted: Dec. 28, 2004

It sounded like a thud.

Maybe a bird had flown into the C-130 as it took off from an airfield in northern Iraq. Or so the flight crew thought.

But then lights and instruments in the cockpit began to blink and sound. One of the flashing instruments alerted the crew to a fire in an engine. A crew member looked out a window to see one of the engines engulfed in flames.

This was more than a bird.

What happened in the next 10 minutes is something the crew from Milwaukee will probably talk about for a long time.

The six-man flight crew from the Air Force Reserve 440th Airlift Wing based at Mitchell International Airport had just picked up a group of 57 soldiers heading for home at the end of their tour of duty. The crew is part of a group of 180 people deployed from the 440th that rotates in and out of the Southwest Asia Central Command area of operations.

Shortly after the C-130 took off, the plane was hit by enemy ground fire that punched a large hole in one of the engines and severed fuel lines.

"I noticed a lot of fire coming out of the No. 1 engine - the motor pretty much exploded," said Master Sgt. James Grigsby, 41, of Brodhead.
Tense moments

Grigsby and the other flight crew members spoke in a phone interview Tuesday from southwest Asia about the harrowing plane ride that happened several weeks ago. The 440th is one of five air wings in the 386th Air Expeditionary Wing.

The pilot, Maj. Rolf Breen, looked at all the cockpit lights and indicators and immediately noticed two of them - the fire light and the one indicating turbines were overloaded. The No. 1 engine was shut down. That left three engines still working. Normally that would be OK.

A button was pushed that drained a fire extinguisher inside the engine compartment, a chemical designed to deprive the fire of oxygen. It didn't work. A second extinguisher was drained. Same result.

"On a normal engine fire, one of them would work great," said flight engineer Staff Sgt. Dan Hayes, 29, of Fort Atkinson. "But this wasn't a usual engine fire."

The huge holes in the engine were feeding the fire plenty of oxygen, so the fire extinguishers were no help.

Meanwhile, crew members were telling the soldier passengers what was happening, looking for airfields to land, notifying ground control, checking for other damage and trying to extinguish the fire.

"I think I was the only one on the crew who felt like time was going very fast," said co-pilot Capt. Jason Schroeder, 32, a former pilot for United Airlines who lives in Milwaukee. "I didn't really have time to get scared or anything."

They considered heading back to the airfield they had just left but were worried about additional enemy fire. As the fire continued to burn out of control, the crew had much more pressing problems because of the fear the fire would burn right through a wing.
Rocky landing

The C-130 was turned toward a small airfield that had been used by the Iraqi air force. But the pock-marked runway was still heavily damaged from the war. Crews were on the tarmac repairing the runway when they looked up to see a smoking C-130 approaching.

The engine fire burned itself out a few minutes before the plane landed, and Breen managed to set down the C-130 on the half of the runway that wasn't damaged or strewn with construction equipment.

"I said quite a few Hail Marys and a few Our Fathers. I didn't have time to get through a whole rosary," said Breen, 36, of Grafton, who was a pilot for Delta before he was deployed.

Tech Sgt. Robert Sczesny, one of the two load masters aboard, told the soldiers what to expect in case the crew had to set down the plane in the desert. Once the plane landed, Sczesny and Grigsby made sure the soldiers got off safely.

"We got them off the plane in less than a minute, which is pretty fast for 57 soldiers. They made a beeline off the plane because the engine was still smoking," said Sczesny, 40, a Milwaukee firefighter.

"They were all standing at attention and they began to applaud as we got off, which was really nice," Sczesny said. "They had just spent a year there, so they were going out for good. It's another story for them" to talk about.

The soldiers and the 440th flight crew waited four hours before getting on another flight to their destination.

Within hours, the 440th assembled a maintenance team of eight people who were flown to the airfield along with their tools, parts and equipment.

The maintenance crew quickly removed the damaged engine and repaired shrapnel holes in the wing, the props in the No. 2 engine and tail. But first they gaped.

"We were amazed at the damage and amazed at what could have happened," said Tech Sgt. Richard Bobber, 38, of Milwaukee. "It could have taken out a wing if you were looking at it from the luck standpoint."

Holding his arms out as big as a bushel basket, Bobber described in an interview at the 440th headquarters Tuesday the size of one of the holes in the engine.

As the maintenance crew worked on the plane, they came under fire from a mortar attack but were not injured. They had the aircraft fixed - with a new No. 1 engine - and ready to fly in 24 hours.

The flight crew went back into the normal rotation, and their next flight was four days later.

"They sent us right back to the airfield where this happened. We all were a little nervous and had some choice words for the command," Sczesny said. "Alcohol is not allowed here, so we pretty much said our prayers."


From the Dec. 29, 2004, editions of the Milwaukee Journal Sentinel

[MC208B 0]

Hey, where's Ivan when you need him?!?

I posted this story several montyhs ago

Nice to see it back tho