Lindsey 0 #51 December 23, 2005 Still trying to understand the consequences of being partly responsible. For me, the consequences of having responsibility for what happens to me are that I have some control over whether or not I'm going to be a victim. Why do we give each other advice on how to stay safe? I hope it's because we realize that we have some responsibility to keep ourselves out of bad situations. That in no way, in my mind, mitigates the guilt of a person who rapes someone. The rapist is the one who has broken the law....not the victim of rape, no matter what she was wearing or where she was. Being aware that there are bad people in the world and taking steps to avoid them is smart. Not avoiding them is not smart....but it in no way makes a bad person less bad. Just makes me less smart linz-- A conservative is just a liberal who's been mugged. A liberal is just a conservative who's been to jail Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
kelel01 1 #52 December 23, 2005 I agree 100% with Nightingale, although I think mine was even more "my fault". To be clear, I was not raped, but it could have gotten to that point had my friend not walked in. I got drunk to the point of passing out around a total stranger, which led to certain events taking place (which my friend thankfully walked in on the middle of). Does that mean I "deserved" whatever I might have gotten? NO. But could I have prevented setting myself up for it? Absolutely. I agree with Gravitymaster . . . it shouldn't make a difference in the eyes of the court, etc. But in my mind, had I been raped, I would have always felt partially responsible - even somewhat forgiving of the perpetrator, sick as it may seem. Thankfully, though, it didn't get to that point, and I received a proverbial slap on the wrist for being so stupid. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
RhondaLea 4 #53 December 23, 2005 QuoteQuoteQuoteSorry -- not "you" in particular, just everyone who's participated in this stupid, uncontroversial "topic". Yeah I guess you have to be raped for it to be a valid topic Par for the course, your comment doesn't make a bit of sense. It made perfect sense to me.If you don't know where you're going, you should know where you came from. Gullah Proverb Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
RhondaLea 4 #54 December 23, 2005 QuoteBeing aware that there are bad people in the world and taking steps to avoid them is smart. Not avoiding them is not smart....but it in no way makes a bad person less bad. Just makes me less smart The problem here is that you're trying to separate (correctly) the two issues that Ian has tried to merge (incorrectly). He's having a hard time with the idea that one person's behavior doesn't in any way justify the behavior of another. We just had this discussion in another thread about Matthew Shepard. Different fact pattern, but the argument is supposed to be "if you put yourself in a dangerous situation, you get what's coming to you." The argument didn't work re Matthew Shepard, and it doesn't work with a rape victim. Given that his original premise didn't have anything to do with walking around on the bad side of town, but simply with being a dick tease, all the arguments about putting oneself in harm's way (with strangers) don't even have a place here. The real answer to the question is, "don't go home with Ian." rlIf you don't know where you're going, you should know where you came from. Gullah Proverb Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
miked10270 0 #55 December 23, 2005 Quotei think that this attitude of "i should be able to wear what i want, where i want, and when i want" is sometimes partly responsible for them getting raped...Quote BOLLOCKS! BOLLOCKS! UTTER AND ABSOLUTE BOLLOCKS!......(make up the next 20 or so lines yourself!) Maybe I shouldn't go on 'til I've counted to 10++++++++++! BTEW, anyone know of a way to make the start of my post any more visible & strident. I could go on to discuss how foul & destructive Rape is. How it isn't about sex, it's about POWER!... Naaahh... I'm off to post some comedy. Mike. Taking the piss out of the FrenchAmericans since before it was fashionable. Prenait la pisse hors du FrançaisCanadiens méridionaux puisqu'avant lui à la mode. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites 1969912 0 #56 December 23, 2005 You trying to get bleached, er, I mean banned? "Once we got to the point where twenty/something's needed a place on the corner that changed the oil in their cars we were doomed . . ." -NickDG Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites artistcalledian 0 #57 December 23, 2005 QuoteThe real answer to the question is, "don't go home with Ian." hahahahaha some of the shit you come out with is priceless sometimes________________________________________ drive it like you stole it and f*ck the police Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites artistcalledian 0 #58 December 23, 2005 QuoteI could go on to discuss how foul & destructive Rape is. How it isn't about sex, it's about POWER!... and you know that for a fact in every case do you? some decent bloke who has been chatting a girl up in a nightclub all night, they both have a snog and a grope... they agree to go back to her/his house, both are drunk... they start heavy petty on the bed, get naked and at the very last moment she says no.. he carries on and she cries rape... thats about power is it? i think those circumstances are purely about sex________________________________________ drive it like you stole it and f*ck the police Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites miked10270 0 #59 December 23, 2005 Quote... a fact in every case ... decent bloke ... chatting a girl up ... snog and a grope... ... both are drunk... heavy petty ... get naked ... she says no... cries rape... Yep. Power. Forcing will. Also... A long way away from your initial post about provocative dress in risky area! Ask your G/f. Incidentally... Did you, err... just get home after the Works Christmas Party when you posted this? Is this something more productively discussed "Wiff Yer Brief"? Mike. Taking the piss out of the FrenchAmericans since before it was fashionable. Prenait la pisse hors du FrançaisCanadiens méridionaux puisqu'avant lui à la mode. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites Lindsey 0 #60 December 23, 2005 they start heavy petty on the bed, get naked and at the very last moment she says no.. he carries on and she cries rape... thats about power is it? i think those circumstances are purely about sex That's not just "crying" rape, that IS rape. It IS about power, and the guy who "carries on" is a rapist, and no different than the fella who lurks in the shadows waiting for a victim. linz-- A conservative is just a liberal who's been mugged. A liberal is just a conservative who's been to jail Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites RhondaLea 4 #61 December 23, 2005 QuoteQuote... a fact in every case ... decent bloke ... chatting a girl up ... snog and a grope... ... both are drunk... heavy petty ... get naked ... she says no... cries rape... Yep. Power. Forcing will. Also... A long way away from your initial post about provocative dress in risky area! His initial post was about "...if a woman is dressed like a slut, leads a man on... goes back to his house, then says no to sex right at the last moment..... she must shoulder some of the blame for what happens next." It got taken off track later on, but the original post was clearly about "date rape." rlIf you don't know where you're going, you should know where you came from. Gullah Proverb Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites Remster 30 #62 December 23, 2005 QuoteYou trying to get bleached, er, I mean banned? Having discussions and debates is exactly what this forum is about. For once, Ian's posts arent trollish! We dont ban or warn people when they express opinions that are to many's views, way out there.Remster Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites Darius11 12 #63 December 23, 2005 You know what mostly I think you’re funny or crazy in regards to your other posts. But this one I agree with you. If you act like a slut dress like a whore and lead a guy on make out with him play with his dick let him rub your pussy then say well I think I should go home at the same time your taking off your panties then yes you have to take responsibility for your actions. I remember there was a story on here a few years ago about a teenager who fucked 2 or 3 guys in the same night but accused one of the guys of rape. Witch is fucked up in my opinion. I know there is people who say well that’s was her choice, and by saying no or I want to go home the guy should jump off and say oh let me get you a cab. That’s bull shit and who ever does not think so is living in a dream world.I'd rather be hated for who I am, than loved for who I am not." - Kurt Cobain Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites Gravitymaster 0 #64 December 23, 2005 QuoteYou know what mostly I think you’re funny or crazy in regards to your other posts. But this one I agree with you. If you act like a slut dress like a whore and lead a guy on make out with him play with his dick let him rub your pussy then say well I think I should go home at the same time your taking off your panties then yes you have to take responsibility for your actions. I remember there was a story on here a few years ago about a teenager who fucked 2 or 3 guys in the same night but accused one of the guys of rape. Witch is fucked up in my opinion. I know there is people who say well that’s was her choice, and by saying no or I want to go home the guy should jump off and say oh let me get you a cab. That’s bull shit and who ever does not think so is living in a dream world. Here's another one women may want to avoid IMO. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites tigra 0 #65 December 23, 2005 It would be so much easier if they wore special hats or something. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites artistcalledian 0 #66 December 23, 2005 QuoteIt would be so much easier if they wore special hats or something. how about you lend me your ass hat? ________________________________________ drive it like you stole it and f*ck the police Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites Lindsey 0 #67 December 23, 2005 yep.... I can see a guy being pissed, and not wanting to pursue a relationship with a person who would lead him on like that, but to think it's okay to go ahead and have his way with her is frightening. Perhaps she's comfortable with some nekkid play and thinks that he is too. Is there no point at which she's able to say no? Her responsibility for what happens is in being with a person who has the capacity to rape her.... I think the "special" hat idea is a good one.-- A conservative is just a liberal who's been mugged. A liberal is just a conservative who's been to jail Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites tigra 0 #68 December 23, 2005 I'd be happy to send him to you if you send me the airfare. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites Gravitymaster 0 #69 December 23, 2005 QuoteIt would be so much easier if they wore special hats or something. It really amazes me how guys get their dick hard over some woman and then thinks it's the womans fault and then the woman who caused it has some responsibility to relieve his immature little teenaged hard on because he no longer can control himself. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites Gravitymaster 0 #70 December 23, 2005 Quoteyep.... I can see a guy being pissed, and not wanting to pursue a relationship with a person who would lead him on like that, but to think it's okay to go ahead and have his way with her is frightening. Perhaps she's comfortable with some nekkid play and thinks that he is too. Is there no point at which she's able to say no? Her responsibility for what happens is in being with a person who has the capacity to rape her.... I think the "special" hat idea is a good one. Yep. I wonder how these guys would feel if it turned out the "woman" was actually a transvestite and they got fucked in the ass by force. Would they claim they had it coming to themselves? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites artistcalledian 0 #71 December 23, 2005 QuoteQuoteyep.... I can see a guy being pissed, and not wanting to pursue a relationship with a person who would lead him on like that, but to think it's okay to go ahead and have his way with her is frightening. Perhaps she's comfortable with some nekkid play and thinks that he is too. Is there no point at which she's able to say no? Her responsibility for what happens is in being with a person who has the capacity to rape her.... I think the "special" hat idea is a good one. Yep. I wonder how these guys would feel if it turned out the "woman" was actually a transvestite and they got fucked in the ass by force. Would they claim they had it coming to themselves? ok, would you be happy about your girlfriend going out looking a little slutty to a bar with her friends?________________________________________ drive it like you stole it and f*ck the police Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites RhondaLea 4 #72 December 23, 2005 QuoteHere's another one women may want to avoid IMO. I sometimes think this is why it is better to get to know someone from a distance (online) first. You never know where these attitudes are going to come up. What I do know is that people who think this way are people I want to avoid at all cost. For the guy who made the statement: It's not just women who get to change their minds at any time. I want you to think about all the times you've changed your mind about anything, and then tell me why sex should be different from any other decision one makes. rlIf you don't know where you're going, you should know where you came from. Gullah Proverb Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites artistcalledian 0 #73 December 23, 2005 QuoteIt's not just women who get to change their minds at any time. I want you to think about all the times you've changed your mind about anything, and then tell me why sex should be different from any other decision one makes we're getting a little sidelined on the point i'm trying to make. I'm 100% agreed that all rape is wrong, But what i'm trying to say is that its also wrong for a woman to do certain things and expect her "no" to then be taken seriously every time. I'm talking about the real world here, in real situations________________________________________ drive it like you stole it and f*ck the police Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites Gravitymaster 0 #74 December 23, 2005 QuoteQuoteQuoteyep.... I can see a guy being pissed, and not wanting to pursue a relationship with a person who would lead him on like that, but to think it's okay to go ahead and have his way with her is frightening. Perhaps she's comfortable with some nekkid play and thinks that he is too. Is there no point at which she's able to say no? Her responsibility for what happens is in being with a person who has the capacity to rape her.... I think the "special" hat idea is a good one. Yep. I wonder how these guys would feel if it turned out the "woman" was actually a transvestite and they got fucked in the ass by force. Would they claim they had it coming to themselves? Quoteok, would you be happy about your girlfriend going out looking a little slutty to a bar with her friends? Since I don't go to bars, I have the ability and the maturity to choose women who don't either. It might surprise you to know there are many women who appreciate a guy for his intelect and they don't find it necessary to troll bars for losers. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites artistcalledian 0 #75 December 23, 2005 QuoteSince I don't go to bars, I have the ability and the maturity to choose women who don't either. It might surprise you to know there are many women who appreciate a guy for his intelect and they don't find it necessary to troll bars for losers. you don't go to bars? ________________________________________ drive it like you stole it and f*ck the police Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites Prev 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 Next Page 3 of 9 Join the conversation You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account. Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible. Reply to this topic... × Pasted as rich text. Paste as plain text instead Only 75 emoji are allowed. × Your link has been automatically embedded. Display as a link instead × Your previous content has been restored. Clear editor × You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL. Insert image from URL × Desktop Tablet Phone Submit Reply 0 Go To Topic Listing
1969912 0 #56 December 23, 2005 You trying to get bleached, er, I mean banned? "Once we got to the point where twenty/something's needed a place on the corner that changed the oil in their cars we were doomed . . ." -NickDG Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
artistcalledian 0 #57 December 23, 2005 QuoteThe real answer to the question is, "don't go home with Ian." hahahahaha some of the shit you come out with is priceless sometimes________________________________________ drive it like you stole it and f*ck the police Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
artistcalledian 0 #58 December 23, 2005 QuoteI could go on to discuss how foul & destructive Rape is. How it isn't about sex, it's about POWER!... and you know that for a fact in every case do you? some decent bloke who has been chatting a girl up in a nightclub all night, they both have a snog and a grope... they agree to go back to her/his house, both are drunk... they start heavy petty on the bed, get naked and at the very last moment she says no.. he carries on and she cries rape... thats about power is it? i think those circumstances are purely about sex________________________________________ drive it like you stole it and f*ck the police Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
miked10270 0 #59 December 23, 2005 Quote... a fact in every case ... decent bloke ... chatting a girl up ... snog and a grope... ... both are drunk... heavy petty ... get naked ... she says no... cries rape... Yep. Power. Forcing will. Also... A long way away from your initial post about provocative dress in risky area! Ask your G/f. Incidentally... Did you, err... just get home after the Works Christmas Party when you posted this? Is this something more productively discussed "Wiff Yer Brief"? Mike. Taking the piss out of the FrenchAmericans since before it was fashionable. Prenait la pisse hors du FrançaisCanadiens méridionaux puisqu'avant lui à la mode. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Lindsey 0 #60 December 23, 2005 they start heavy petty on the bed, get naked and at the very last moment she says no.. he carries on and she cries rape... thats about power is it? i think those circumstances are purely about sex That's not just "crying" rape, that IS rape. It IS about power, and the guy who "carries on" is a rapist, and no different than the fella who lurks in the shadows waiting for a victim. linz-- A conservative is just a liberal who's been mugged. A liberal is just a conservative who's been to jail Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
RhondaLea 4 #61 December 23, 2005 QuoteQuote... a fact in every case ... decent bloke ... chatting a girl up ... snog and a grope... ... both are drunk... heavy petty ... get naked ... she says no... cries rape... Yep. Power. Forcing will. Also... A long way away from your initial post about provocative dress in risky area! His initial post was about "...if a woman is dressed like a slut, leads a man on... goes back to his house, then says no to sex right at the last moment..... she must shoulder some of the blame for what happens next." It got taken off track later on, but the original post was clearly about "date rape." rlIf you don't know where you're going, you should know where you came from. Gullah Proverb Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Remster 30 #62 December 23, 2005 QuoteYou trying to get bleached, er, I mean banned? Having discussions and debates is exactly what this forum is about. For once, Ian's posts arent trollish! We dont ban or warn people when they express opinions that are to many's views, way out there.Remster Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Darius11 12 #63 December 23, 2005 You know what mostly I think you’re funny or crazy in regards to your other posts. But this one I agree with you. If you act like a slut dress like a whore and lead a guy on make out with him play with his dick let him rub your pussy then say well I think I should go home at the same time your taking off your panties then yes you have to take responsibility for your actions. I remember there was a story on here a few years ago about a teenager who fucked 2 or 3 guys in the same night but accused one of the guys of rape. Witch is fucked up in my opinion. I know there is people who say well that’s was her choice, and by saying no or I want to go home the guy should jump off and say oh let me get you a cab. That’s bull shit and who ever does not think so is living in a dream world.I'd rather be hated for who I am, than loved for who I am not." - Kurt Cobain Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Gravitymaster 0 #64 December 23, 2005 QuoteYou know what mostly I think you’re funny or crazy in regards to your other posts. But this one I agree with you. If you act like a slut dress like a whore and lead a guy on make out with him play with his dick let him rub your pussy then say well I think I should go home at the same time your taking off your panties then yes you have to take responsibility for your actions. I remember there was a story on here a few years ago about a teenager who fucked 2 or 3 guys in the same night but accused one of the guys of rape. Witch is fucked up in my opinion. I know there is people who say well that’s was her choice, and by saying no or I want to go home the guy should jump off and say oh let me get you a cab. That’s bull shit and who ever does not think so is living in a dream world. Here's another one women may want to avoid IMO. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
tigra 0 #65 December 23, 2005 It would be so much easier if they wore special hats or something. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
artistcalledian 0 #66 December 23, 2005 QuoteIt would be so much easier if they wore special hats or something. how about you lend me your ass hat? ________________________________________ drive it like you stole it and f*ck the police Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Lindsey 0 #67 December 23, 2005 yep.... I can see a guy being pissed, and not wanting to pursue a relationship with a person who would lead him on like that, but to think it's okay to go ahead and have his way with her is frightening. Perhaps she's comfortable with some nekkid play and thinks that he is too. Is there no point at which she's able to say no? Her responsibility for what happens is in being with a person who has the capacity to rape her.... I think the "special" hat idea is a good one.-- A conservative is just a liberal who's been mugged. A liberal is just a conservative who's been to jail Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
tigra 0 #68 December 23, 2005 I'd be happy to send him to you if you send me the airfare. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Gravitymaster 0 #69 December 23, 2005 QuoteIt would be so much easier if they wore special hats or something. It really amazes me how guys get their dick hard over some woman and then thinks it's the womans fault and then the woman who caused it has some responsibility to relieve his immature little teenaged hard on because he no longer can control himself. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Gravitymaster 0 #70 December 23, 2005 Quoteyep.... I can see a guy being pissed, and not wanting to pursue a relationship with a person who would lead him on like that, but to think it's okay to go ahead and have his way with her is frightening. Perhaps she's comfortable with some nekkid play and thinks that he is too. Is there no point at which she's able to say no? Her responsibility for what happens is in being with a person who has the capacity to rape her.... I think the "special" hat idea is a good one. Yep. I wonder how these guys would feel if it turned out the "woman" was actually a transvestite and they got fucked in the ass by force. Would they claim they had it coming to themselves? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
artistcalledian 0 #71 December 23, 2005 QuoteQuoteyep.... I can see a guy being pissed, and not wanting to pursue a relationship with a person who would lead him on like that, but to think it's okay to go ahead and have his way with her is frightening. Perhaps she's comfortable with some nekkid play and thinks that he is too. Is there no point at which she's able to say no? Her responsibility for what happens is in being with a person who has the capacity to rape her.... I think the "special" hat idea is a good one. Yep. I wonder how these guys would feel if it turned out the "woman" was actually a transvestite and they got fucked in the ass by force. Would they claim they had it coming to themselves? ok, would you be happy about your girlfriend going out looking a little slutty to a bar with her friends?________________________________________ drive it like you stole it and f*ck the police Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
RhondaLea 4 #72 December 23, 2005 QuoteHere's another one women may want to avoid IMO. I sometimes think this is why it is better to get to know someone from a distance (online) first. You never know where these attitudes are going to come up. What I do know is that people who think this way are people I want to avoid at all cost. For the guy who made the statement: It's not just women who get to change their minds at any time. I want you to think about all the times you've changed your mind about anything, and then tell me why sex should be different from any other decision one makes. rlIf you don't know where you're going, you should know where you came from. Gullah Proverb Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
artistcalledian 0 #73 December 23, 2005 QuoteIt's not just women who get to change their minds at any time. I want you to think about all the times you've changed your mind about anything, and then tell me why sex should be different from any other decision one makes we're getting a little sidelined on the point i'm trying to make. I'm 100% agreed that all rape is wrong, But what i'm trying to say is that its also wrong for a woman to do certain things and expect her "no" to then be taken seriously every time. I'm talking about the real world here, in real situations________________________________________ drive it like you stole it and f*ck the police Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Gravitymaster 0 #74 December 23, 2005 QuoteQuoteQuoteyep.... I can see a guy being pissed, and not wanting to pursue a relationship with a person who would lead him on like that, but to think it's okay to go ahead and have his way with her is frightening. Perhaps she's comfortable with some nekkid play and thinks that he is too. Is there no point at which she's able to say no? Her responsibility for what happens is in being with a person who has the capacity to rape her.... I think the "special" hat idea is a good one. Yep. I wonder how these guys would feel if it turned out the "woman" was actually a transvestite and they got fucked in the ass by force. Would they claim they had it coming to themselves? Quoteok, would you be happy about your girlfriend going out looking a little slutty to a bar with her friends? Since I don't go to bars, I have the ability and the maturity to choose women who don't either. It might surprise you to know there are many women who appreciate a guy for his intelect and they don't find it necessary to troll bars for losers. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites artistcalledian 0 #75 December 23, 2005 QuoteSince I don't go to bars, I have the ability and the maturity to choose women who don't either. It might surprise you to know there are many women who appreciate a guy for his intelect and they don't find it necessary to troll bars for losers. you don't go to bars? ________________________________________ drive it like you stole it and f*ck the police Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites Prev 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 Next Page 3 of 9 Join the conversation You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account. Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible. Reply to this topic... × Pasted as rich text. Paste as plain text instead Only 75 emoji are allowed. × Your link has been automatically embedded. Display as a link instead × Your previous content has been restored. Clear editor × You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL. Insert image from URL × Desktop Tablet Phone Submit Reply 0
artistcalledian 0 #75 December 23, 2005 QuoteSince I don't go to bars, I have the ability and the maturity to choose women who don't either. It might surprise you to know there are many women who appreciate a guy for his intelect and they don't find it necessary to troll bars for losers. you don't go to bars? ________________________________________ drive it like you stole it and f*ck the police Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
