ACMESkydiver 0 #26 January 9, 2008 Quote Damn...that was priceless!!! You know Red is going to chase you down and kick you in the... ankle, right? (I would have said kneecap but, well...she's short) HEY!!! 5' 3" is considered rather lofty and statuesque in some places...like the Pygmy nation. ~Jaye Do not believe that possibly you can escape the reward of your action. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
mnealtx 0 #27 January 9, 2008 Quote Quote Damn...that was priceless!!! You know Red is going to chase you down and kick you in the... ankle, right? (I would have said kneecap but, well...she's short) HEY!!! 5' 3" is considered rather lofty and statuesque in some places...like the Pygmy nation. No, I'm pretty sure *they've* got ya beat on the height issue, too!! Mike I love you, Shannon and Jim. POPS 9708 , SCR 14706 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
hottamaly 1 #28 January 9, 2008 Do you want to run for President? Amen sista!! Skydiving gave me a reason to live I'm not afraid of what I'll miss when I die...I'm afraid of what I'll miss as I live Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
shermanator 4 #29 January 10, 2008 well you got my fiancee beat. she stands at 4'9"CLICK HERE! new blog posted 9/21/08 CSA #720 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
jm951 0 #30 January 10, 2008 I know who I'd vote for if you were running. About time somebody had the stones to say what needs sayin'. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Gene03 0 #31 January 10, 2008 I bet you're feeling a lot better now? Don't let the bastards get you down.“The only fool bigger than the person who knows it all is the person who argues with him. Stanislaw Jerzy Lec quotes (Polish writer, poet and satirist 1906-1966) Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
rickjump1 0 #32 January 10, 2008 I like what you say. Next time, just don't sugarcoat it. Do your part for global warming: ban beans and hold all popcorn farts. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
ACMESkydiver 0 #33 January 10, 2008 Quote I bet you're feeling a lot better now? As a matter of fact, I do. ~Jaye Do not believe that possibly you can escape the reward of your action. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
mnealtx 0 #34 January 10, 2008 Quote Quote I bet you're feeling a lot better now? As a matter of fact, I do. Still short, though... *ducks/runs*Mike I love you, Shannon and Jim. POPS 9708 , SCR 14706 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
TrophyHusband 0 #35 January 10, 2008 i agree with you, i blame the hippy democrats. "Your scrotum is quite nice" - Skymama www.kjandmegan.com Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Shotgun 1 #36 January 10, 2008 Ok, because this is Speakers Corner, and it's weird to have a thread where everyone is just agreeing with you, I have to come back and ask: QuoteWHAT IN THE WORLD gave you the fucking idea that you are the only one that matters in a marriage? Maybe you should have realized that you are far too fucking selfish to ever commit to anything but yourself and NOT GOTTEN MARRIED IN THE FIRST PLACE. Would have been better than bogging those of us that take the commitment seriously down into your fucking 80% divorce rate statistics. Why are you upset about other people getting divorced? Doesn't seem like it should affect you or your own marriage in any way. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
ACMESkydiver 0 #37 January 10, 2008 Quote Ok, because this is Speakers Corner, and it's weird to have a thread where everyone is just agreeing with you, I have to come back and ask: Quote WHAT IN THE WORLD gave you the fucking idea that you are the only one that matters in a marriage? Maybe you should have realized that you are far too fucking selfish to ever commit to anything but yourself and NOT GOTTEN MARRIED IN THE FIRST PLACE. Would have been better than bogging those of us that take the commitment seriously down into your fucking 80% divorce rate statistics. Why are you upset about other people getting divorced? Doesn't seem like it should affect you or your own marriage in any way. That first part is awesome! You're right; you can't have a thread in a forum based upon debate without some debate, so here goes: Regarding the marriage, 2 reasons it bother me personally: divorce and kids. With divorce rates nearing 8 of 10 marriages in this country (I heard that in a recent seminar and don't recall the sited source) -what message are the kids that are growing up right now getting? Love isn't permanent, adults are unaccountable, a promise is not a promise. Talk about taking the hope out of the future. It may seem like I'm reaching on this, but hear me out. I have a keenly observant 11 year old daughter that is asking these tough questions right now. "Why aren't Rachel's parents together? Why does her mom have a boyfriend? Why AREN'T Emmy's parents divorced?" Then you get the divorce with children...and it's just a mess in the best of situations. I'm jaded, I admit it. An inlaw -whom shall remain nameless to protect the idiot- Has 2 kids from 2 different guys (I know that's common). Ditched the first one when she was pregnant, married the second one when she was pregnant with his kid, they were together a total of 5 months. Then she moved in with us. Now recently, the first daddy has been trying to track down his then 8 year old daughter. He was married with 2 kids. Started talking to dummy, and moved in with her and her two daughters, leaving his wife and 2 sons (one toddler and one newborn, BTW). Not even divorced yet. THE POINT? -My nieces have had 3 last names since before they hit 4th grade. They are confused, mom tells them that whomever just dumped her is dangerous and doesn't love them, the girls have to see daddy's for visitation and they live in terror because mom wants it that way. We'll be getting a call any day now that she wants to move in with us again, no doubt...Those girls don't deserve that. Judging all divorcees based on my idiot inlaw? No, I pray to God it isn't that common. It is admittedly an extreme case, but once again, half of my daughters' friends come from broken homes, and tell me you don't see pain in a kid's eyes when they tell you they can't because they have to go visit their dad that weekend. They love both parents but don't know where their place is any more and it breaks my heart, it does. Anyway, I blame DISNEY!! We were the generation that grew up on Disney princesses, and they taught us to kiss a frog, he'd turn into a prince and you'd ride off into the sunset and live happily ever after. If we put as much into planning the marriage as we did on planning the honeymoon, we'd all be better off. I would advocate (and I'm really going to get this put in for state of WA! Wait and see!) a quarter-long, college level course on marriage prior to getting the license. It would include books such as 'For Better or Best' by Smalley, 'The Art of Understanding Your Mate' by Osborne, 'The Five Love Languages' by Chapman, among others. It will teach 'How to fight right', like Shedd proposes in his book 'Letters to Karen'. Fighting right means disagreeing but agreeing to rules of fair play! Critical. Many married couples don't know where the line is when arguing. It needs to be known. How many people wouldn't get the license because they couldn't be bothered with a quarter-long class like that? 80% divorce rate... If you got the license and meant 'forever', then we should take it seriously and give ourselves the best shot at it! I'm not one of those 'Stay in the marriage no matter WHAT' advocates...in cases of abuse or broken vows, I wouldn't try to tell a person to continue something dangerous. If people had more knowlegde and understanding up front, maybe they would take that commitment more to heart. Maybe they would choose to wait, and it would be the right decision. After years of 'helping' some married couples through some tough times (Joe and I are not marriage counselors), and seeing the same issues come up over and over, it's just not that uncommon that the honeymoon is over...whine and complain about your spouse...I don't love you any more and I'm out of here. Gyah. My mom was married young and divorced quickly before she met my dad. I don't hate divorcees! I love my mom, I love a lot of people that have gone through a divorce. Mom would be the first to admit that jumping into marriage that first time was a mistake (well obviously). I'm just saying that it does effect me, living with so much hopelessness all around. I want to help change that.~Jaye Do not believe that possibly you can escape the reward of your action. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
rickjump1 0 #38 January 10, 2008 So true. Children suffer. My wife still has her former students come up and hug her. They had no love and attention at home so they attempted to get it at school.Do your part for global warming: ban beans and hold all popcorn farts. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
PLFXpert 0 #39 January 10, 2008 Quote Anyway, I blame DISNEY!! I was sort-of skimming your response and then I couldn't help myself. You so funny! Maybe it's the crazy divorce rate, my experience, or whatever, but I just don't want to be married. With Billy I feel like every moment we are together is b/c we really want to be--not b/c we agreed to be. Paint me in a corner, but my color comes back. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Shotgun 1 #40 January 11, 2008 Thanks for the explanation. I do agree that divorce can be a bad thing for children, but living with parents who no longer love each other can be a bad thing for children too. In both cases, the effect on the children depends on how the situation is handled. It sounds like the problem you describe has more to do with people having children before they're ready rather than a problem with so many people getting divorced. A person could get divorced twenty times, and if there are no children involved, then I can't really see anything wrong with that. (Though you would think they'd get tired of the hassle. ) And making it more difficult to get married (like requiring a class) might change the divorce rate, but it probably wouldn't do anything to reduce the number of people having kids before they're ready for kids. Quote If you got the license and meant 'forever', then we should take it seriously and give ourselves the best shot at it! I don't think that everyone means "forever" when they get married. (Marriage means so many different things to different people.) But everyone does mean "forever" when they decide to have a child, whether they like it or not, and whether they are married or not. And I don't think that the divorce rate has much to do with people having kids before they're ready for such a commitment, but I don't know what can be done about that since we can't restrict people from reproducing. And I guess I don't equate a high divorce rate with "hopelessness" because I didn't grow up thinking that my happiness depended on falling in love with one person and being with them for the rest of my life. Not that there's anything wrong with wanting such a thing for yourself, but I guess that would cause us to have different perspectives on what marriage and divorce mean. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
PLFXpert 0 #41 January 11, 2008 Quote because I didn't grow up thinking that my happiness depended on falling in love with one person and being with them for the rest of my life. Not that there's anything wrong with wanting such a thing for yourself, but I guess that would cause us to have different perspectives on what marriage and divorce mean. What does marriage mean to you if not "falling in love" and wanting to "be with that person for the rest of your life"? I'm with you, though--marriage means different things to different people. It certainly doesn't mean for me whether or not I'm in love or want to be with someone the rest of my life. I already have that. And I'm not "married".Paint me in a corner, but my color comes back. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Shotgun 1 #42 January 11, 2008 Quote What does marriage mean to you if not "falling in love" and wanting to "be with that person for the rest of your life"? I see it as mostly a legal thing. If people just want to make an emotional commitment to each other, a legal marriage is not necessary for that, as you already know. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
ACMESkydiver 0 #43 January 11, 2008 Quote And I don't think that the divorce rate has much to do with people having kids before they're ready for such a commitment, but I don't know what can be done about that since we can't restrict people from reproducing. If science could develop a way to make it so that you can't have children without taking a pill (which was mentioned somewhere in these forums in the past), I would be all for helping to fund it. I'm not talking about requiring people to be infertile, but how many of us would do that if it was available? I know I sure would have! How great would it be if we could make SURE that we didn't produce babies unless we fully intended to? I already know the arguments against...it might encourage younger sex, it would alleviate the consequences of sex that many churches rely upon to give people reason to not have sex until marriage...government would try to find a way to require it on some (the mentally ill? Rapists? etc) -who would produce the procedure or medication -is it safe? What if it's not reversible? Yadda yadda yadda... And you know I've said it before, but I would lay money on having a 10 year legal marriage contract available in the US before the end of this century. A temporary marriage. I don't know of any religion that will endorse it, & for sure will try to fight it, but proponents will talk of it as a legal contract, not an acknowledged religious union. And that will be ok for the non-religious. It will come with stipulation and pre-nup agreements already built in. I'm telling you it's going to happen, wait and see...I'm not saying it's good or bad. I'm saying it's coming.~Jaye Do not believe that possibly you can escape the reward of your action. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
ACMESkydiver 0 #44 January 11, 2008 Quote Quote because I didn't grow up thinking that my happiness depended on falling in love with one person and being with them for the rest of my life. Not that there's anything wrong with wanting such a thing for yourself, but I guess that would cause us to have different perspectives on what marriage and divorce mean. What does marriage mean to you if not "falling in love" and wanting to "be with that person for the rest of your life"? I'm with you, though--marriage means different things to different people. It certainly doesn't mean for me whether or not I'm in love or want to be with someone the rest of my life. I already have that. And I'm not "married". Far better than getting married because somebody else tells you it's a good idea.~Jaye Do not believe that possibly you can escape the reward of your action. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
georgerussia 0 #45 January 11, 2008 Quote What does marriage mean to you if not "falling in love" and wanting to "be with that person for the rest of your life"? Tax deduction. Or inheritance money. Or a solution to immigration problems. Or your family/grandfamily/friends approval. Or religious reasons. Whatever.* Don't pray for me if you wanna help - just send me a check. * Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
georgerussia 0 #46 January 11, 2008 Quote -what message are the kids that are growing up right now getting? Love isn't permanent, adults are unaccountable, a promise is not a promise. Then they are getting the correct message.* Don't pray for me if you wanna help - just send me a check. * Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
PLFXpert 0 #47 January 11, 2008 I was just curious what it meant to Shotgun. We've already conceded it means different things to different people and can be done for different reasons. Paint me in a corner, but my color comes back. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
PLFXpert 0 #48 January 11, 2008 Quote I see it as mostly a legal thing. If people just want to make an emotional commitment to each other, a legal marriage is not necessary for that, as you already know. A legal marriage isn't necessary for a lot of things people think it is--but it makes some things easier. For me, the only instance I have considered might be cause for a legal marriage is a life & death situation. I wouldn't want there to be any complications getting in to see Billy if God forbid something happened. B/c I don't know if I'd happen to have a piece of mail, mortgage coupon & a desposit slip for our joint accounts on me to prove we're life partners. Although I'm not sure a legal spouse does anything other than run in and tell whomever they're the "wife" or "husband" anyways, and that's likely what I'd do.We have living wills and Billy gets to pull the plug. But, I'm sure there's more immediate instances when a decision might need to be made by one of us and I'm just not sure how all that works. I haven't looked into it and I probably should soon.Paint me in a corner, but my color comes back. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Shotgun 1 #49 January 11, 2008 QuoteAlthough I'm not sure a legal spouse does anything other than run in and tell whomever they're the "wife" or "husband" anyways, and that's likely what I'd do. Unfortunately, I have been in that position before. I'm pretty sure that all I did was tell them that I'm his wife, and they never asked any questions beyond that. I guess they didn't even notice that my last name was different from his when I was signing all the papers. (Hmm, or maybe that's because my signature is unreadable.) So you might get away with that even if you're not really his wife, but there might be legal issues with it later on. I'm not sure how that stuff works. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
ACMESkydiver 0 #50 January 11, 2008 Quote Quote -what message are the kids that are growing up right now getting? Love isn't permanent, adults are unaccountable, a promise is not a promise. Then they are getting the correct message. Well thank you, mister positive. I guess all that remains is to find out if you're the type of person to wallow in it and complain, or the type that will actually do something to make it better. I'm working towards a solution. I hope you are, too.~Jaye Do not believe that possibly you can escape the reward of your action. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
