0
ockers

Having fun with a buyer who is trained to use a rubber double ended strap-on deployment system!!!

By ockers, in General Skydiving Discussions

Recommended Posts

ockers    0

ockers
You can normally spot these ar$eholes a mile off with the send me your best price and okay type language. Bold text, capitals and italics are the norm too.

Here is an amusing exchange between me and a guy who is well trained in the use of a rubber double ended strap on...... (I have left his typo's etc as original).

----- Original Message -----
From: scammer
To: me
Sent: Friday, May 26, 2006 7:58 PM
Subject: respond to my enquiry ................

Hi
i am interested in .....is it available forsale let me know the asking price for it and hope it is in good condition you may call me if needed 703186xxxx hope this is the site you placed forsale.
thanks
regards
Scammer

wrote:
Its in great condition, are you qualified to jump it?

----- Original Message -----
From: Scammer
To: Me
Sent: Tuesday, May 30, 2006 11:00 AM
Subject: Re: respond to my enquiry ................

Hi i need to know the asking price as well as your location and i need to let you know that i am qualified to jump it because i have been making use of it before so i am used to it okay so get back to me now because i need to make the payment urgently .
thanks
regards
Fred .

wrote:
Are you qualified to use a rubber double-ended strap on deployment system?

----- Original Message -----
From: Scammer
To: Me
Sent: Tuesday, May 30, 2006 10:54 PM
Subject: Re: respond to my enquiry ................

Hi
i am not interested in all these questions you keep aking me all i know is am interested in that i have requesteed for so let me know if it is forsale or not at least you placed this forsale so what brough about too many question so get back to me if you will be selling this to me okay i need the asking pric e ... your name ..... and your address ind you the phone number is important so as soon as i get all this a cashier cheque will be written out as the mode of payment and i will arrange for the picking up of the good okay
thanks
regards
Fred

wrote:
The rubber double-ended strap on deployment system is quite complex and would be very painful if you have not been trained to use it properly. I could not think about selling this to someone who hasn't been properly trained in its use. Skydiving is a dangerous sport and use of a double ender would be fatal in the wrong hands.


----- Original Message -----
From: Scammer
To: Me
Sent: Wednesday, May 31, 2006 10:00 PM
Subject: i know much more about it and i always train with it . ................

Hello,
i got your mail and i realy understand your feelings regarding doubble rubber okay but i want you to understand me that i have been fully trained with this and that is the reason why i have been looking for it to purchase okay so kindly let talk on the transaction i need to buy this nad if you realy want to sell it to some one i think i am the right person to buy it from you becausei haverealy know much about this and i trained with it almost all time but the former one i make use of is apoilt that is why i need toi buy yours.so get back to me now with the asking price , your address, and your phone number to know who exactly i am transacting with .get back to me now with the required information .
thanks
regards
Fred .

Share this post

Link to post
Share on other sites

Gene03    0

Gene03
"i need to buy this nad"

He could be a serious buyer????? NAAAAAAAA.
“The only fool bigger than the person who knows it all is the person who argues with him.

Stanislaw Jerzy Lec quotes (Polish writer, poet and satirist 1906-1966)

Share this post

Link to post
Share on other sites

ockers    0

ockers
I always time out of my life to try and waste a bit of these ba$tards time. I might spend some time with photoshop tonight to combine rig/double ender pictures and ask him if the one he trained on looks the same!!!!

Here is another one from last year....

Kevin is the scammer
Paul is me


From: kevin
To: paul@
Sent: Tuesday, November 08, 2005 11:35 AM
Subject: Talon 3, Safire 190, Airforce 180, Cypres,


Hi,
I just mail to confirm if the above name advert
placement is still for sale as am really intrested
of buying it kindly get back to me with your last
offer and also send to me its pictures so,that i can
know if its really worth the amount you are
selling it for me.

I expect your urgent response.

kevin


He wanted pictures so he gets sent about a dozen 2mb files sent to cheer him up! I wonder if downtown Lagos has broadband??


From: paul@
To: kevin
Sent: Tuesday, November 08, 2005 7:04 PM
Subject: Re: Talon 3, Safire 190, Airforce 180, Cypres,


Hi Kevin,

It is still for sale, one guy is trying to get the $$ together but hasn't made a final commitment.

Pictures attached as requested. They are pretty high res so you should get a pretty good idea.

I was looking for AU$6000 but will take $5700

0410 xxxxxx if you want to speak

Cheers

Paul


Kevin's reply...
Thanks for your mail,the price is fairly ok by me but i will like to know if payment by cheque will be ok for the payment,if ok,you are to get back to me with the name you will like to be on the cheque alongside your contact address so that payment can be made to you will like to have your phone number so that we can talk more extensively more on this


I replied saying that was fine

Kevin again...
Thanks for your mail,i will instruct my Secretary to issued the cheque to you but mind you she will include shipment fees with it so you are to deduct your selling price and the remaining funds should be send to my Shipping company who will later come to your location for the pickup of my goods alongside the one am buying from you I hope the above explanation is understood by you,if that should be the case,i await your quick response so that the payment can be made by my Secretary immediately

A few weeks later from me, (I had already sold the rig but wanted to see where this went. His 'check' had shown up and it was pretty realistic, interestingly sent from Ireland!!!!! This guy had my address and I wasn't moving house until the next weekend so needed to stall him).....

3 weeks and no sign of your cheque so far so assume you are no longer interested. A friend has my rig at the moment to test jump so I won't have it back til next weekend at the earliest. If your deal falls through, I'll sell it to him. Where do you jump by the way Kevin

Kevin again....
Thanks for your patience,the cheque will get to you in a short time so do let me know as soon as you got it so as to advised on how you will be sending the remaining money to the shipping company who will later come to your location for the pickup


OK, so now I tell him the check has turned up...

Your cheque finally showed up but only for US$3000 That is less than AU$4000 and I told you the rig was for sale at AU$6000. I was happy to accept a small reduction to AU$5700 but no less. The guy who borrowed my rig still has it and has offered me AU$5500 for it because he can't afford any more. If you want it, you will need to come up with another AU$2000 for me to sell it to you. If it helps, I can take it on good faith that you will send the balance and I can ship the gear. If you sort out the shipping details and pay it from your end with UPS or someone similar,
I can take the rig into their office for you. I won't have it back until Monday or Tuesday but can ship it as soon as it gets here if you have arranged the UPS payment. You seemed really keen on the rig and I know you will be happy with it when you get it. Just let me know what you want to do

..I was thinking at this stage that a small bag of sand might have been funny to send him!!!

Oh dear, seems Kevin has a few dramas..
----- Original Message -----
From: kevin
To: paul@
Sent: Wednesday, December 07, 2005 3:21 AM
Subject: PLEASE HELP ME OUT


Hi Paul,
I won,t be able to buy the Rig any longer because i received a call from our family Doctor that my blood brother have a serious accident while coming from his business trip this lead to the crack in his spinal Cord and the doctor told me that i will needed to raise a sum of 10,000$ for the operation to start,i will need your assistance here because i don,t have more than 6000$ in my account.i will urged you to do me a favour by cashing the check so that you will be able to send the money to the Doctor so that he can start with the operation,i will be rewarding you
with a sum of 200$ for the time you must have wasted on this transaction.
Thanks for your understanding.
KEVIN

----- Original Message -----
From: paul@
To: kevin
Sent: Thursday, December 08, 2005 8:52 PM
Subject: Re: PLEASE HELP ME OUT


Hey Kevin

Sorry to hear that, that's a real pisser.

How do you want me to send the money to you?

Blue skies

Paul


OK, Kevin again..
Hi Paul,

Thanks for your mail and support,You are to transfer the funds to the Doctor direct so that the operation can start immediately
So you are to go to any of this westernunion office near your area and transfer the funds to them

Below is the Doctor information in which you will need in transfering the funds to the Hospital.

NAME:-FUNMILADE SUNDAY
ADDRESS:-106,MAINLAND AVE
APAPA CRES
LAGOS STATE.
NIGERIA.23401


As soon as the money has been send you are to get back to me with the necessary westernunion details such as.

CONTROL NO(MTCN):-

AMOUNT SENT:-

SENDERS FULL NAME:-

TEXT QUESTION & ANSWER:-

Thanks for your assistance and understanding,may God Almighty bless you..
Regards,
KEVIN...


So I ignore him

Hi Paul,

I hope you got and understand my mail concerning how you will be transfering the funds to my Family Doctor?????????????????

Get back to me as soon as possible.
Regards,
Kevin.

So ignore him some more and he calls me a heap of times on the mobile on Saturday afternoon, all of which I answer and pretend I can't hear him, leaving the phone connected on the table. Nigeria to Oz mobile 5 times cant be cheap!

Here is his next reply, notice he has changed to Mrs...

From: kevin
To: paul@
Sent: Saturday, December 10, 2005 5:33 PM
Subject: Business Is Done With Trust..



Hi Paul,

I called your number just to know when you will sending the funds to the Doctor so that he will start with the operation on my Brother but i don,t know if the network is bad or you are the one cutting the phone.Business is done with trust,that is the reason why i send such as huge amount to you base on trust.

Business is done With Trust..
Regards,
Mrs.K.Moore

More ignoring him and letting him sweat...

From: kevin
To: paul
Sent: Monday, December 12, 2005 2:22 AM
Subject: Business is done with Trust........................

Paul,

I hope you got all the previous mail i sent to you because i don,t know hear anything from you,if by Monday i still didn,t hear anything from you i may be forced to contact the authority over this transaction and also i will
instruct my Bank to stop payment on the cheque with you

Business is done with Trust.
Mr.K.Moore..

Time to reply....
Hey Kevin,

I got a couple of calls the other night but just couldn't hear anything. I have been away for a few days researching the physics and dynamic lateral forces of airflow on women's wobbly bits in freefall and unable to access email. Your cheque is in my office, as soon as I get back I will bank it and send your money over.

Hope it wasn't bumlove that affected your brother

All the best

Pork

From: kevin
To: Paul
Sent: Tuesday, December 13, 2005 5:27 AM
Subject: Re: Business is done with Trust........................


Hi Paul,

Thanks for your mail,i will like to know when exactly will you be transfering the funds to the Doctor so as to notify him over this.OK

Looking forward to hear from you soonest.
Regards,
Kevin...

From: Paul
To: kevin
Sent: Wednesday, December 14, 2005 2:09 PM
Subject: Re: Business is done with Trust........................


Hi Kevin,

Didn't make it into work today so will try tomorrow.

What happened to your brother, was it bumlove or something more serious like beaverleavings disease?

All the best

Paul

Sadly no bite or comment on the use of language It amused me when i wrote it!..

From: kevin
To: Paul
Sent: Wednesday, December 14, 2005 4:15 AM
Subject: Re: Business is done with Trust........................


Hi Paul,
I don,t even know what the cause of the problem is because he can,t even say a word to me ever since the accident.I will let the Doctor know the you will be sending the funds to him Tomorrow so that he can start making all necessary arranegement over the operation.OK
Thanks for your mail and support.
Regards,
Kevin..

I'm amazed at how presumptive these fu(kers are!!!
Anyway, this guy has my personal email address which is also my website with pictures of the house etc. so its bye bye time

OK,

Sounds to me that you lot smoke far too many purple oboes, resulting in a considerable consumption of throat yoghurt!

I took the cheque into the bank today and they asked me to wait in a side office whilst they checked the details. The next thing I know the police turn up and arrest me for trying to gain money using counterfeit documents. After many hours, they let me go and I am due back in court after Christmas.

They have confiscated your check and my computer at home, also they have charged me with being involved in an international money laundering and fraud operation. There is an additional charge of being tiptop bloke which is clearly aimed at me!

The police are also contacting their counterparts in Nigeria so you and your Doctor Sunday can probably expect some rubber gloved starfish stretching treatment fairly shortly.

I am assuming that this is all a terrible mistake that will be quickly resolved but if the milk turns out to be sour, I aint the kinda pussy to drink it.

Not sure what else to say really

Stiff upper lip and all

Pork Sword

Share this post

Link to post
Share on other sites

kelpdiver    2

kelpdiver
Quote

Hahaha -

you need to start a club dedicated to the screwing around with telemarketers and internet scammers and spammers.

The CDSATISS - I'm in



419eaters.com is a group focused on Nigerian scams, but ockers is as good as any of them. The fun seems to be in getting them to send pictures of themselves holding up signs.

Share this post

Link to post
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.
Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

×
0
Go To Topic Listing