chuckakers 425 #26 April 1, 2009 Let you skydive? With that perspective, you don't stand a chance.Chuck Akers D-10855 Houston, TX Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
pirana 0 #27 April 1, 2009 QuoteQuoteTurn in your man card as you leave the building. Hmmm... so what would your answer be if it was an irrational husband not "letting" the wife jump? Uh oh. Here comes the what-does-a-woman-really-want-when-she-asks-if-she-looks-fat discussion. But seriously, for people of integrity, the answer does not depend on gender." . . . the lust for power can be just as completely satisfied by suggesting people into loving their servitude as by flogging them and kicking them into obedience." -- Aldous Huxley Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Alb2Headed 0 #28 April 1, 2009 How about you don't tell her? At least for the first jump. My family couldn't bare the thought of me jumping so none of them knew until the day after Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
regulator 0 #29 April 1, 2009 I met my fiancee long after I started jumping. She is deathly afraid of pretty much everything so jumping for her is out of the question, but I proposed to her on valentines day and I made an agreement that yes I'll marry you happily, but I want my own rig, and I want to make a deal so every other weekend I'll go to the DZ for 5 to 6 hours and jump. That way I dont spend all my time there but I still get to jump. I'm satisfied with this arrangement for a few years until we get most of our bills taken care of then I'll probaby start jumping more then but for now the arrangement works fine. If she is completely irrational about it then you might be hard pressed decide which one to choose. Both of them (hot tang and skydiving) are addictive...but if you didnt have kids and she was only a luke warm tang then I'd drop her ass...but thats just me. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
MajorDad 0 #30 April 1, 2009 Marriage Counselling. You married her and made a baby. Skydiving isn't the issue here, your relationship with your "irrational wife" is. Good luck with that! Major Dad CSPA D-579 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
JohnMitchell 16 #31 April 1, 2009 Quote so every other weekend I'll go to the DZ for 5 to 6 hours and jump. That way I dont spend all my time there but I still get to jump. I'm satisfied with this arrangement for a few years until we get most of our bills taken care of then I'll probaby start jumping more then but for now the arrangement works fine. Does she know you plan to start jumping more in a few years? Let me know how all that works out. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
mr_music11 0 #32 April 1, 2009 QuoteWell maybe shes not completely irrational. Throwing yourself out of an airplane isnt exactly normal. I REALLY want to do it, and get my license but she keeps freakin out and saying I dont care about the welfare of her and the baby (4 1/2...i guess shes still a baby) Sounds like my wife was not as freaked out as your wife-she knew how much I had wanted to do it and then went out and did some research/went to the DZ to see how gently the parachutes can and do land (compared to her ideas of the big bounce or how hard they would come down) She asked a bunch of questions of a friend of hers that also skydives to get a better understanding of what takes place. She made sure that I do have a life insurance policy. And the rest is history. I still call her after EVERY jump to let her know I am safe (others might complain about having to do this or flame me becuz I do... but its a small price to pay to be able to enjoy the sport) As with ANYTHING in life.. stepping out your front door, climbing into a car, riding an elevator, climbing onto a jet liner. All have risk... its about minimizing that risk. Minimize the risk.. maximize the fun. Good luck.. hope you get to enjoy the blue skiesIf flying is piloting a plane.. then swimming is driving a boat. I know why birds sing.. I skydive. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
mr_music11 0 #33 April 1, 2009 Quote How about you don't tell her? At least for the first jump. My family couldn't bare the thought of me jumping so none of them knew until the day after Glad that worked out for you/and Im not flaming you for it....however I wouldn't recommend it to the married or those wanting to maintain a strong tie/relationship with those around them. A good/strong marriage/love relationship is based on trust and honost communication. Doing it and dealing with an angry loved one I feel is better than hiding the truth from that person and eroding at the base of that relationship. bluesIf flying is piloting a plane.. then swimming is driving a boat. I know why birds sing.. I skydive. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
JohnRich 4 #34 April 1, 2009 Are you going to be a pussy-whipped sissy all your life, or are you going to go jump? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
GLIDEANGLE 1 #35 April 1, 2009 I would argue that much of this discussion may be about the wrong relationship. Most folks have written about the relationship between you and your wife (Man card, balls, etc). Perhaps the more important relationship to examine is between you and your child. I know that I felt a tremendous responsibility to provide for and rear my son. That got between me and skydiving for a long time. We each have to make our own decisions based on what matters to us. Good Luck... the sky will be there tomorrow.The choices we make have consequences, for us & for others! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Para5-0 0 #36 April 1, 2009 Ok, First tell your wife this is a second career. A midlife crisis. You have to train to become a coach/instructor. Once she hears you may bring home a few dollars a weekend and she can buy that coach puse she wants, all of a sudden moods change regarding the safety of your life. Approach it from, You are doing this for them not you. Trust me, it worked on my 3rd and 4th wife just fine. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
airtwardo 7 #37 April 1, 2009 Trust me, it worked on my 3rd and 4th wife just fine. If at first you don't succeed... ~ If you choke a Smurf, what color does it turn? ~ Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
TNturtle 0 #38 April 1, 2009 QuoteAre you going to be a pussy-whipped sissy all your life, or are you going to go jump? I asked a similar question not too long ago. The above quote is the kind of reply I was hoping to get. Gender seems to make a big difference! My best advise....stop reading now! The best and most sincere advise will come to you in private messages. These folks have seen or experienced it all. They love this sport, share your enthusiasum, and wish you and your family the best. I share your delema, give all my love & time to my family, then hall ass 4 or 5 states away just so I can jump for a day. Crazy we are ! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
airtwardo 7 #39 April 1, 2009 QuoteQuoteTurn in your man card as you leave the building. Hmmm... so what would your answer be if it was an irrational husband not "letting" the wife jump? My answer would be pretty much the same...tell the controlling SOB to turn in his man card for not encouraging his wife to live her life. explore new things, expand her resume of experiences. On a serious note, I certainly understand the feeling of reservation regarding the ever present possibilities... But I believe it comes down to a question of personal priorities and risk assessment. If "I" thought there were a good chance of my not being around to enjoy my family because of any particular endeavour, I would think hard and weigh the cost/benefit to ME. I was jumping 18 years before I met my wife, she often says she can't imagine what life would be like if I wasn't skydiving given the joy I get from it. Together 15 + years, 3 kids, a couple mortgages, business ventures etc...we're happy because we actively support each others dreams. You can live life (relativity) safely in a bubble, but the view never changes. If that's all you want, that's fine... but if you have the urge to taste different things then go do it. Often denying yourself those opportunities has as much, if not more of a negative effect on those around you, than not being there at all. ~ If you choke a Smurf, what color does it turn? ~ Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
regulator 0 #40 April 1, 2009 C'mon John! I had to work hard to get 6 hours at the DZ every other weekend as it is. Tell you what...I wont tell her I plan on jumping more in a couple years if you dont! Deal? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
ladydyver 0 #41 April 1, 2009 we're happy because we actively support each others dreams. ----------------------------------------------------------- in my opinion this is why it works so well - being supportive of ones dreams and endeavors is where it is at....some of us are lucky to have that. DPH # 2 "I am not sure what you are suppose to do with that, but I don't think it is suppose to flop around like that." ~Skootz~ I have a strong regard for the rules.......doc! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
topdocker 0 #42 April 1, 2009 I don't see this as a need to "grow some" or "think of the children." Both of those mean you bury what you honestly want to do for the sake of your wife and children. At some point in your relationship with both your wife and children, you have to be honest with them to tell them what is important to you. We're not talking about selling the house and living green in South America here, just trying something out. Did you ask permission to take up golf, lots of people die getting struck by lightning on the course? How would your wife feel if something happened to you on the way to work and you never got to fulfill your dream of finding out what freefall was like? How will your children feel when they got older and knew they were the reasons you never got to try something. Would you hold them back when they are older? Great relationships are about helping/abetting your partner's dreams. Holding them back is about control, insecurity, and all the things that make relationships wrong. You've obviously thought about this and really want to do it. You know what motivates your wife, you need to find that trigger that will allow her to be you. Also, tell her that the worst thing that can happen to you is not that you die, but that you will love it! Or go when she's at her sister's and apologize later. topJump more, post less! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
billvon 2,990 #43 April 1, 2009 Perhaps as a first step, stop referring to her as "my irrational wife!" Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Mazz 0 #44 April 1, 2009 QuotePerhaps as a first step, stop referring to her as "my irrational wife!" lol, true.In the Navy, you can't put your hands in your pockets but I was always told not to put my hands in my pockets by people with their hands in their pockets. Kinda funny huh? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
piratemike 0 #45 April 1, 2009 QuoteGreat relationships are about helping/abetting your partner's dreams. Holding them back is about control, insecurity, and all the things that make relationships wrong. I very much agree. I'm glad that I'm not in scythes position. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Remster 30 #46 April 1, 2009 QuotePerhaps as a first step, stop referring to her as "my irrational wife!" Yes. May I suggest "The ole ball and chain", or "that hag who is destroying my soul" as both being inline with your way of thinking.Remster Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Tuna-Salad 0 #47 April 1, 2009 It's time to make a cutaway man...Millions of my potential children died on your daughters' face last night. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
millertime24 8 #48 April 1, 2009 Ok I have to say something here. If you have adequate life insurance to cover the child until the age of 18 in the event something bad happens you should just do it. Why the hell would anyone who 'loves' you want to hinder you from doing something like skydiving provided all safety measures are employed (ie insurance, research, etc)? These sort of threads always serve to reaffirm me of my decision to stay single and not have kids. I can do whatever I want, whenever I want, spend as much money as I want and not have to be concerned about catching a verbal lashing or worse when I come home.Muff #5048 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Chubba 0 #49 April 1, 2009 Just jump, sort out the details later. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
MajorDad 0 #50 April 1, 2009 Quote Quote Perhaps as a first step, stop referring to her as "my irrational wife!" Yes. May I suggest "The ole ball and chain", or "that hag who is destroying my soul" as both being inline with your way of thinking. By the way, how is Karen doing, Remi? Luv ya both lots!!! Major Dad CSPA D-579 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
