SkyyPunk 0 #1 May 5, 2005 Just wondering what kind of stories people have come up with that you have heard or heard of. I know it may be wrong to laugh but everyone needs a good laugh correct? Like the typical idea to pick up women beinbg a guy sitting there doing a H.A.L.O. jump with 3 jumps or in some cases Teresa told me this one someone trying to convince her that hes a regular jumper at her DZ. So what are those wild and crazy stories youve let others tell you or heard others say right before you punk em out? -Punk Im noone special. Im just an asshole, Like you. It's not my fault Im ugly, just like it's not your fault your stupid. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
crotalus01 0 #2 May 5, 2005 an acquaintance from out of town that i took to the DZ to do a tandem jump. she said she had been skydiving before, that a friend had a cessna and loaned her his rig, showed her how to deploy the BOC - she went up and jumped several times with no problems (no training in stability either apparantly). i didnt have to punk her out though, she got down from the tandem jump hyperventalating and puking. later she stuck by her story of soloing from the cessna several times edit to add that the TM later told me she had no idea how to hold an arch and freaked out on the exit. As for me and my house, we will serve the LORD... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
towerrat 0 #3 May 5, 2005 Quote she said she had been skydiving before, that a friend had a cessna and loaned her his rig ------------------------------------------------------------ I had a fellow try to convince me of this once. He told me he had " a whole bunch of jumps" and that he was cuurently learning how to do "tricks". This guy was such a backwoods redneck I didn't even bother to argue with him. I asked him what kind of tricks he could do and his reply was " just all the usual tricks" Needless to say I didn't believe himPlay stupid games, win stupid prizes! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites nbblood 0 #4 May 5, 2005 I had a soldier of mine tell me he had done 17 skydives. He proceeded to tell me that he went with his sister on her first skydive and it freaked her out as he swooped down to her during her AFF skydive. He then told me he had 2 base jumps, one from a bridge and one from a cliff. As a side note, he was pretty well known as a perpetual liar. I punked him out with a couple easy questions that any skydiver would know, which, of course, he couldn't answer. I later told him he shouldn't try to sell his BS to a person he knew was a skydiver, he'd only make a fool of himself. It was quite comical. Blues, NathanBlues, Nathan If you wait 'til the last minute, it'll only take a minute. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites Punky_Monkey 0 #5 May 5, 2005 I work with this guy who told me when I was starting skydiving that he used to be an instructor. Well, I wore my closing pin necklace to work the other day. My friend asked him if he saw it. He said ya, why is she wearing a fishing lure around her neck. He actually thought it was for fishing. Today he was talking to me about flaring my canopy. I had been having problems for awhile. He told me to start my flare at 40 feet above the ground. (I think he wants me dead) I laughed in his face and walked away. This guy is a total lier about everything....******* Punky Monkey You may never get rid of the butterflies, but you can teach them how to fly in formation Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites JohnMitchell 16 #6 May 5, 2005 Had whuffos talk about watching a guy land a streamer but plf'ing right out of it to be okay. Another time some girl was talking all about skydiving, but didn't have a clue. I took her to my place and showed her my rig. She must have felt bad, because she certainly made up for it after that. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites skinnyshrek 0 #7 May 5, 2005 That was my grandma she feels ok now thoughhttp://www.skydivethefarm.com do you realize that when you critisize people you dont know over the internet, you become part of a growing society of twats? ARE YOU ONE OF THEM? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites JohnMitchell 16 #8 May 5, 2005 She was hot! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites EDYDO 0 #9 May 5, 2005 If you want a good whuffo story to tell, do this. First, tell the other jumpers what you are doing so they will go along. Then, get in a crowd of whuffos, preferably rednecks and pretend to be a whuffo. It won't take long to find an easy target, ie: the big talker. Encourage his bravado, let him set himself up and then say, "I will if you will." It can get really funny. Billy Bob, you go ahead. Ed Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites skinnyshrek 0 #10 May 5, 2005 she still is you cheeky bastard. She got cremated last week...http://www.skydivethefarm.com do you realize that when you critisize people you dont know over the internet, you become part of a growing society of twats? ARE YOU ONE OF THEM? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites JohnMitchell 16 #11 May 5, 2005 Quoteshe still is you cheeky bastard. She got cremated last week... Make up your mind. I thought you said "she feels okay now." Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites skinnyshrek 0 #12 May 5, 2005 due its late and im drinking sorry...lol hey come to party poker play texas hold emhttp://www.skydivethefarm.com do you realize that when you critisize people you dont know over the internet, you become part of a growing society of twats? ARE YOU ONE OF THEM? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites noname 0 #13 May 5, 2005 A guy who lives by the dropzone told me he made two solo jumps and on the second one he landed in his yard. He said he wasn't scared and he was one wild and craaaaazy dude .... he just leaps out of the plane YEAH I'M A BADASS. Then he made this funny sideways jump and made a motion like he was pulling his ripcord like he saw on tv. I guess he didn't realize that was exactly where his cutaway handle would have been on a REAL jump. Yeah, I always pull my cutaway handle right out the door, I'm just a badass like that. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites justinb138 0 #14 May 5, 2005 Quote Yeah, I always pull my cutaway handle right out the door, I'm just a badass like that. Hey, it worked for that Lutz guy I keep seeing on TV. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites ChrisL 2 #15 May 5, 2005 QuoteIf you want a good whuffo story to tell, do this. First, tell the other jumpers what you are doing so they will go along. Then, get in a crowd of whuffos, preferably rednecks and pretend to be a whuffo. It won't take long to find an easy target, ie: the big talker. Encourage his bravado, let him set himself up and then say, "I will if you will." It can get really funny. Billy Bob, you go ahead. Ed Done it. It never works. They will agree to do it on the spot because they cant appear to be a pussy, but then later they find all kinds of things that prevent them from following through that they have no control over. "Hey I'd do it, but my house just burned to the ground and I have to save up for a new one. After that I'm in for sure!"__ My mighty steed Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites f1shlips 2 #16 May 5, 2005 Some rigs have a main ripcord handle right by the cutaway handle.-- drop zone (drop'zone) n. An incestuous sesspool of broken people. -- Attributed to a whuffo girlfriend. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites Crater 0 #17 May 5, 2005 This is a second hand story but I heard about someone joining a university club. When asked if they'd ever jumped they were adamant that they'd done two tandem base-jumps After some thought everyone decided that they was confusing parachuting with paragliding. Honest mistake, but still..._________________________________________ "That's not flying ... That's falling with style!" - (Woody, Toy Story) Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites EDYDO 0 #18 May 5, 2005 Quote They will agree to do it on the spot because they cant appear to be a pussy, but then later they find all kinds of things that prevent them from following through that they have no control over. "Hey I'd do it, but my house just burned to the ground and I have to save up for a new one. After that I'm in for sure!" That is exactly what I expect to happen. One almost started putting the rig on before he backed out. A lawyer can be quite inventive when it comes to backing out. I would like to see these same guys just off the ski lift at the top of a mountain. How are you gonna talk your way out of that one? Ed Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites bob.dino 1 #19 May 5, 2005 Old Telesis and PigMee (sp?) SOS Ripcord systems have the ripcord-to-deploy-the-main handle on the right MLW, and a single cutaway-main-and-deploy-reserve fabric loop on left. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites noname 0 #20 May 5, 2005 QuoteOld Telesis and PigMee (sp?) SOS Ripcord systems have the ripcord-to-deploy-the-main handle on the right MLW, and a single cutaway-main-and-deploy-reserve fabric loop on left. Anything is possible, but I kinda doubt the guy had this for student gear last year. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites bob.dino 1 #21 May 5, 2005 If he learned in Australia he did. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites Eiley 0 #22 May 6, 2005 QuoteIf he learned in Australia he did. Well that sure depends on where in Oz. My DZ has had hip-mounted ripcords for several years now. nothing to see here Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites bob.dino 1 #23 May 6, 2005 Really? I was told that all Australian DZs used the old chest-mounted ripcords. Obviously not so. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites masher 1 #24 May 6, 2005 Australian DZs need to use ripcord activated student gear with as SOS handle. The OpRegs don't say where the main ripcord is mounted. If the DZ has a training waiver, they can use throwouts and other things.-- Arching is overrated - Marlies Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites Eiley 0 #25 May 6, 2005 QuoteAustralian DZs need to use ripcord activated student gear with as SOS handle. The OpRegs don't say where the main ripcord is mounted. If the DZ has a training waiver, they can use throwouts and other things. We use ripcords, but they are located on the hip near where a throwout would be. It supposedly makes the transition that little bit easier. We've used this system for many years now. We still have the SOS on the left. nothing to see here Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites Prev 1 2 3 Next Page 1 of 3 Join the conversation You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account. Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible. Reply to this topic... × Pasted as rich text. Paste as plain text instead Only 75 emoji are allowed. × Your link has been automatically embedded. Display as a link instead × Your previous content has been restored. Clear editor × You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL. Insert image from URL × Desktop Tablet Phone Submit Reply 0
nbblood 0 #4 May 5, 2005 I had a soldier of mine tell me he had done 17 skydives. He proceeded to tell me that he went with his sister on her first skydive and it freaked her out as he swooped down to her during her AFF skydive. He then told me he had 2 base jumps, one from a bridge and one from a cliff. As a side note, he was pretty well known as a perpetual liar. I punked him out with a couple easy questions that any skydiver would know, which, of course, he couldn't answer. I later told him he shouldn't try to sell his BS to a person he knew was a skydiver, he'd only make a fool of himself. It was quite comical. Blues, NathanBlues, Nathan If you wait 'til the last minute, it'll only take a minute. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Punky_Monkey 0 #5 May 5, 2005 I work with this guy who told me when I was starting skydiving that he used to be an instructor. Well, I wore my closing pin necklace to work the other day. My friend asked him if he saw it. He said ya, why is she wearing a fishing lure around her neck. He actually thought it was for fishing. Today he was talking to me about flaring my canopy. I had been having problems for awhile. He told me to start my flare at 40 feet above the ground. (I think he wants me dead) I laughed in his face and walked away. This guy is a total lier about everything....******* Punky Monkey You may never get rid of the butterflies, but you can teach them how to fly in formation Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
JohnMitchell 16 #6 May 5, 2005 Had whuffos talk about watching a guy land a streamer but plf'ing right out of it to be okay. Another time some girl was talking all about skydiving, but didn't have a clue. I took her to my place and showed her my rig. She must have felt bad, because she certainly made up for it after that. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
skinnyshrek 0 #7 May 5, 2005 That was my grandma she feels ok now thoughhttp://www.skydivethefarm.com do you realize that when you critisize people you dont know over the internet, you become part of a growing society of twats? ARE YOU ONE OF THEM? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
EDYDO 0 #9 May 5, 2005 If you want a good whuffo story to tell, do this. First, tell the other jumpers what you are doing so they will go along. Then, get in a crowd of whuffos, preferably rednecks and pretend to be a whuffo. It won't take long to find an easy target, ie: the big talker. Encourage his bravado, let him set himself up and then say, "I will if you will." It can get really funny. Billy Bob, you go ahead. Ed Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
skinnyshrek 0 #10 May 5, 2005 she still is you cheeky bastard. She got cremated last week...http://www.skydivethefarm.com do you realize that when you critisize people you dont know over the internet, you become part of a growing society of twats? ARE YOU ONE OF THEM? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
JohnMitchell 16 #11 May 5, 2005 Quoteshe still is you cheeky bastard. She got cremated last week... Make up your mind. I thought you said "she feels okay now." Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
skinnyshrek 0 #12 May 5, 2005 due its late and im drinking sorry...lol hey come to party poker play texas hold emhttp://www.skydivethefarm.com do you realize that when you critisize people you dont know over the internet, you become part of a growing society of twats? ARE YOU ONE OF THEM? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
noname 0 #13 May 5, 2005 A guy who lives by the dropzone told me he made two solo jumps and on the second one he landed in his yard. He said he wasn't scared and he was one wild and craaaaazy dude .... he just leaps out of the plane YEAH I'M A BADASS. Then he made this funny sideways jump and made a motion like he was pulling his ripcord like he saw on tv. I guess he didn't realize that was exactly where his cutaway handle would have been on a REAL jump. Yeah, I always pull my cutaway handle right out the door, I'm just a badass like that. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
justinb138 0 #14 May 5, 2005 Quote Yeah, I always pull my cutaway handle right out the door, I'm just a badass like that. Hey, it worked for that Lutz guy I keep seeing on TV. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
ChrisL 2 #15 May 5, 2005 QuoteIf you want a good whuffo story to tell, do this. First, tell the other jumpers what you are doing so they will go along. Then, get in a crowd of whuffos, preferably rednecks and pretend to be a whuffo. It won't take long to find an easy target, ie: the big talker. Encourage his bravado, let him set himself up and then say, "I will if you will." It can get really funny. Billy Bob, you go ahead. Ed Done it. It never works. They will agree to do it on the spot because they cant appear to be a pussy, but then later they find all kinds of things that prevent them from following through that they have no control over. "Hey I'd do it, but my house just burned to the ground and I have to save up for a new one. After that I'm in for sure!"__ My mighty steed Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
f1shlips 2 #16 May 5, 2005 Some rigs have a main ripcord handle right by the cutaway handle.-- drop zone (drop'zone) n. An incestuous sesspool of broken people. -- Attributed to a whuffo girlfriend. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Crater 0 #17 May 5, 2005 This is a second hand story but I heard about someone joining a university club. When asked if they'd ever jumped they were adamant that they'd done two tandem base-jumps After some thought everyone decided that they was confusing parachuting with paragliding. Honest mistake, but still..._________________________________________ "That's not flying ... That's falling with style!" - (Woody, Toy Story) Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
EDYDO 0 #18 May 5, 2005 Quote They will agree to do it on the spot because they cant appear to be a pussy, but then later they find all kinds of things that prevent them from following through that they have no control over. "Hey I'd do it, but my house just burned to the ground and I have to save up for a new one. After that I'm in for sure!" That is exactly what I expect to happen. One almost started putting the rig on before he backed out. A lawyer can be quite inventive when it comes to backing out. I would like to see these same guys just off the ski lift at the top of a mountain. How are you gonna talk your way out of that one? Ed Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
bob.dino 1 #19 May 5, 2005 Old Telesis and PigMee (sp?) SOS Ripcord systems have the ripcord-to-deploy-the-main handle on the right MLW, and a single cutaway-main-and-deploy-reserve fabric loop on left. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
noname 0 #20 May 5, 2005 QuoteOld Telesis and PigMee (sp?) SOS Ripcord systems have the ripcord-to-deploy-the-main handle on the right MLW, and a single cutaway-main-and-deploy-reserve fabric loop on left. Anything is possible, but I kinda doubt the guy had this for student gear last year. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
bob.dino 1 #21 May 5, 2005 If he learned in Australia he did. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Eiley 0 #22 May 6, 2005 QuoteIf he learned in Australia he did. Well that sure depends on where in Oz. My DZ has had hip-mounted ripcords for several years now. nothing to see here Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
bob.dino 1 #23 May 6, 2005 Really? I was told that all Australian DZs used the old chest-mounted ripcords. Obviously not so. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
masher 1 #24 May 6, 2005 Australian DZs need to use ripcord activated student gear with as SOS handle. The OpRegs don't say where the main ripcord is mounted. If the DZ has a training waiver, they can use throwouts and other things.-- Arching is overrated - Marlies Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Eiley 0 #25 May 6, 2005 QuoteAustralian DZs need to use ripcord activated student gear with as SOS handle. The OpRegs don't say where the main ripcord is mounted. If the DZ has a training waiver, they can use throwouts and other things. We use ripcords, but they are located on the hip near where a throwout would be. It supposedly makes the transition that little bit easier. We've used this system for many years now. We still have the SOS on the left. nothing to see here Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites