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Hazarrd

Who farted in the airplane?

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Its not me.. and I have an answer to this.. AS some who have jumped with me will atest to. I jump with a couple STINKY BASTARDS..... so I went and bought a little bottle of Pina Colada Air Freshener... that I lovingly refer to as ASS BE GONE......

ONe little spritz and the airplane returns to harmony and blissB|

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Sounds like somebody's got a "case of the Mondays"!! and bad food combining! Didn't your mom teach you not to eat carbs and proteins? One or the other as they matabolize at different rates and one will ferment..meaning: Let 'er Rip! Yikes!:S





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I'm always nice enough to let them right on exit so as to let the team behind me enjoy while jamming up in the door B|

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"Beware how you take away hope from another human being."
-Oliver Wendell Holmes

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a little bottle of Pina Colada Air Freshener... that I lovingly refer to as ASS BE GONE...ONe little spritz and the airplane returns to harmony and bliss



:D :DOh My Goodness:D :D
i am laughing so hard right now! you are so blantantly hilarious!!! i luv you amazon! :D :D that is such a cute idea ~ is it one of those stick-on-spray-cans?

i have NEVER put any type of odor in the plane... i will die of a stomach ache before i release "booty-air" in the plane :P sometimes smells can get so bad in the plane it will jack-up my skydive... i get a headache from the nasty gases:S sometimes our pilot will spray a nastier smelling spray just to make us all suffer for someone's carefree fot-a-bunch-booty! i also think one of the cutest stickers i have seen on someone's helmet is the: "no-farting" with a -universal no sign- over a little man with a cloud under his leg...:D :D

~ meL* Pink Mafia / Tunnel Mafia Sister

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Every so often I see the same topic on a thread....why does someone stink up the aircraft at altitude?

There really is an explanation, and in case you arent aware of it, let me pass it on to you.

Having spent a lot of time doing High altitude jumps, I made my second home at the Defence and Civil Institute of Environmental Medicine at Canadian Forces Base in Downsview. I had many chances to be in the hypobaric chamber and have been as high as 43000 feet.

The instructor made extra effort to explain gases at high altitude, as a part of the program.

Depending on what you eat, and when you last ate food, it will cause gas to form in the intestinal tract in various amounts.

As your food digests, it will produce this gas, which is always heading for the rear exit.
As you climb to altitude, gas of any kind will expand, and so your intestinal tract and colon will soon be full of gas, the higher you go, the more gas you produce.

Your body can only retain so much, and the rest has to get out.

Similarly, if a jumper has a bad tooth with a small cavity that is filled with decaying food , that small amount of food will produce gas, and as the aircraft climbs, it can cause a very large toothache, so at very high altitudes, you will think your jaw is coming off.

If youi plan on going high, the longer you wait since eating, the more likely the more gas will have formed in your body, so expect the fragrance to be very strong.

Another similarity, is when a large helium balloon is being inflated to cross the ocean, it may be partially filled (say with 100,000 cubic feet of gas) on the ground, but when it gets to 35,000 or 40,000 feet, it expands to contain 1/2 a million cubic feet of helium.


The only difference is in the quantity, and the balloon doesnt fart on the pilot,

There isnt much anyone can do with stomach /intentinal gases....grin and bear it.




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I've been farting in the turrbine all summer. With twenty people in the plane one can get away with it. :)
Now it's winter and we fly a Cesna.
Not so easy to hide anymore :$:S

There are only 10 types of people in the world. Those who understand binary, and those who don't.

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Another similarity, is when a large helium balloon is being inflated to cross the ocean, it may be partially filled (say with 100,000 cubic feet of gas) on the ground, but when it gets to 35,000 or 40,000 feet, it expands to contain 1/2 a million cubic feet of helium.


The only difference is in the quantity, and the balloon doesnt fart on the pilot,

.



Not true - the large (Rozier) balloons used for long distance flights have long (nylon fabric) vents attached to relieve overpressure if they ascend too high - and the vents come right down to the gondola. You can see them on the J. Renee balloon in the attached picture.
...

The only sure way to survive a canopy collision is not to have one.

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Best thing I have found is a couple of drops of Olbas oil in my full face, great for two reasons, the first is I can't smell my own "contributions" the second is that all the free flyers jump open face helmets so can ;)
I'm drunk, you're drunk, lets go back to mine....

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We smile b/c otherwise we'd cry. I have regular exposure to CS, but some of those farts make me want to leave early, even if it does involve bailing at 10 grand and landing off.

Mike
Until you've stepped out at 800' in the dead of night with 100 lbs of chute and equipment.. you haven't jumped. AIRBORNE !

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