airtwardo 7 #26 April 9, 2013 QuoteQuoteSkydiving with a cat is frowned upon, almost everywhere. Almost everywhere? Can you expand on that? Where is there a friendly place I can jump with my cat? a Chinese restaurant. ~ If you choke a Smurf, what color does it turn? ~ Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
jackwallace 3 #27 April 9, 2013 Dam you beat me to it. I was going with ThaiU only make 2 jumps: the first one for some weird reason and the last one that you lived through. The rest are just filler. scr 316 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Trafficdiver 8 #28 April 9, 2013 You can't get pregnant if you have sex after a skydive with another skydiver. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
DBlank 0 #29 April 9, 2013 QuoteYou can't get pregnant if you have sex after a skydive with another skydiver. WHAT? This changes EVERYTHING, I knew that kid wasn't mine."Do you really want to take advice from the guy we call Tarmac?" Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
sfullerman 0 #30 April 9, 2013 [Because of the earths rotation parachutes fly faster & farther when facing west, newer jumper usually are encouraged to face east only when they land...it takes some practice & experience to land safely without flying directly north in the northern hemisphere or south in the southern ] Although skydivers represent a fairly small % of the total world population, they account for over 1/3 of the sunglasses sales, due to the afore mentioned phenomenon by Twardo. I remember one late afternoon dive as a new jumper, making my final approach due west with no shades. I had to do a "mergency" divert landing to the North east and dang near did myself in. Still scares me to this day thinking about it. I'm sittin here at my desk shaking like a squirrel tryin to crap a peach seed. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
airtwardo 7 #31 April 9, 2013 Quote [Because of the earths rotation parachutes fly faster & farther when facing west, newer jumper usually are encouraged to face east only when they land...it takes some practice & experience to land safely without flying directly north in the northern hemisphere or south in the southern ] Although skydivers represent a fairly small % of the total world population, they account for over 1/3 of the sunglasses sales, due to the afore mentioned phenomenon by Twardo. I remember one late afternoon dive as a new jumper, making my final approach due west with no shades. I had to do a "mergency" divert landing to the North east and dang near did myself in. Still scares me to this day thinking about it. I'm sittin here at my desk shaking like a squirrel tryin to crap a peach seed. Hey big man! Good to see you're checkin' in! ~ If you choke a Smurf, what color does it turn? ~ Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Divalent 135 #32 April 10, 2013 Quote...Would you happen to be able to help me out with some facts? Many thanks I strongly recommend you read the "DBCooper" thread in this sub-forum. It is just chock full of facts. (you're welcome!) Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Amanda18 0 #33 April 10, 2013 Lol, im sure my article will be very interesting, thank youQuote Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites Amanda18 0 #34 April 10, 2013 Noted, thank you Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites Amanda18 0 #35 April 10, 2013 Many thanks Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites mr2mk1g 10 #36 April 10, 2013 There is also an emergency handle on our equipment for if you are coming in too quick to land safely. Pulling the handle allows a skydiver to do a go-around and attempt the landing a second time. An electrical backup device is available using ground penetrating radar which assesses the suitability of the landing area. In the event concrete/asphalt etc is detected the device will automatically initiate a go-around so that an alternate landing area can be selected. Advanced versions of the device can be purchased which link to commercially available mapping software and suggest a potential alternate landing area. Much debate has been seen in the skydiving community as to whether such devices should be mandatory for newer skydivers but the issue is divisive and as yet no consensus has been reached. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites tempretired 0 #37 April 10, 2013 Oh, you must know that Skydivers go down faster than non skydivers. It's a gravity thing! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites sfullerman 0 #38 April 10, 2013 Hey big man! Good to see you're checkin' in! -------------------------------------------------------------------- I come out of lurking every couple years to let my smartazz flag fly Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites drjump 0 #39 April 10, 2013 I thought the most hazardous part was driving to and from the drop zone. Have I been wrong all these years? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites airtwardo 7 #40 April 10, 2013 QuoteI thought the most hazardous part was driving to and from the drop zone. Have I been wrong all these years? It varies to a degree, driving a car though hazardous is better than an Ox-cart. ...but driving ANYTHING there - isn't nearly as hazardous as riding a goat there. ~ If you choke a Smurf, what color does it turn? ~ Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites drjump 0 #41 April 10, 2013 Will riding a goat get you pregnant? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites airtwardo 7 #42 April 10, 2013 Quote Will riding a goat get you pregnant? Depends on the goat.... ~ If you choke a Smurf, what color does it turn? ~ Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites mik 2 #43 April 10, 2013 QuoteSkydiving with a cat is frowned upon, almost everywhere. Except in Russia, where it is a requirement of the the first jump post-AFF (along with old frap hat) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HYS_Gge9Klc *********************************************** I'm NOT totally useless... I can be used as a bad example Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites brokenwing 1 #44 April 11, 2013 however taking a roadkill gopher (long time ago so i may not recall the exact details) and doing accuracy approaches is a perfectly acceptable activity -- unless, of course, that you are Bill Ottley (RIP) and a wing of your Bonanza (again details fuzzy) has been designated dead center. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites swovelin 11 #45 April 12, 2013 Ooh, ooh, ooh! Another old-time jumper just reminded me of some additional "unusual but true facts" about skydiving, as follows: • The Downer You Are, The Faller You Fast - You fall faster as you get closer to the earth and gravity - this is especially true of BASE jumping as I'm sure you can attest. • Sunset Loads - It is a well known fact that winds at sunset will subside if enough alcohol is consumed within the USGS grid in question before Green Light. I believe the formula is V=-3k/1liter squared where V=velocity, k = knots and 1 liter is clearly not enough. • DZ Managers - The timing of canopy rides for the purpose of punishing low-pullers simply doesn't count if said stopwatch has been cleared within 5 minutes of the event. (throw hat now). • Reserves - The number of emergency deployments is in direct proportion to the number of times ones mouth is open regarding the lack of said emergency deployments. There! I hope that helps to clarify matters! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites airtwardo 7 #46 April 12, 2013 The slower ya pack the slower it opens! ~ If you choke a Smurf, what color does it turn? ~ Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites Rover 11 #47 April 12, 2013 QuoteMany thanks My beer drinking team has a skydiving problem!2 wrongs don't make a right - but 3 lefts do. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites strife 0 #48 April 12, 2013 QuoteWill riding a goat get you pregnant? still end up with a kid Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites PROGRESSIVE 0 #49 April 13, 2013 If one hundred skydivers were all wearing balloon suits on a successful formation dive, ie, all hooked up in freefall, they could land safely without the use of a parachute. (Don't drop a grip!) Pete (It may require two hundred balloon suits. I forgot. First try one hundred. If I'm wrong, go for two hundred) Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites airtwardo 7 #50 April 14, 2013 Quote If one hundred skydivers were all wearing balloon suits on a successful formation dive, ie, all hooked up in freefall, they could land safely without the use of a parachute. (Don't drop a grip!) Pete (It may require two hundred balloon suits. I forgot. First try one hundred. If I'm wrong, go for two hundred) ...already GOT that tee-shirt! ~ If you choke a Smurf, what color does it turn? ~ Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites Prev 1 2 3 Next Page 2 of 3 Join the conversation You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account. Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible. Reply to this topic... × Pasted as rich text. Paste as plain text instead Only 75 emoji are allowed. × Your link has been automatically embedded. 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Amanda18 0 #34 April 10, 2013 Noted, thank you Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
mr2mk1g 10 #36 April 10, 2013 There is also an emergency handle on our equipment for if you are coming in too quick to land safely. Pulling the handle allows a skydiver to do a go-around and attempt the landing a second time. An electrical backup device is available using ground penetrating radar which assesses the suitability of the landing area. In the event concrete/asphalt etc is detected the device will automatically initiate a go-around so that an alternate landing area can be selected. Advanced versions of the device can be purchased which link to commercially available mapping software and suggest a potential alternate landing area. Much debate has been seen in the skydiving community as to whether such devices should be mandatory for newer skydivers but the issue is divisive and as yet no consensus has been reached. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
tempretired 0 #37 April 10, 2013 Oh, you must know that Skydivers go down faster than non skydivers. It's a gravity thing! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
sfullerman 0 #38 April 10, 2013 Hey big man! Good to see you're checkin' in! -------------------------------------------------------------------- I come out of lurking every couple years to let my smartazz flag fly Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
drjump 0 #39 April 10, 2013 I thought the most hazardous part was driving to and from the drop zone. Have I been wrong all these years? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
airtwardo 7 #40 April 10, 2013 QuoteI thought the most hazardous part was driving to and from the drop zone. Have I been wrong all these years? It varies to a degree, driving a car though hazardous is better than an Ox-cart. ...but driving ANYTHING there - isn't nearly as hazardous as riding a goat there. ~ If you choke a Smurf, what color does it turn? ~ Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
drjump 0 #41 April 10, 2013 Will riding a goat get you pregnant? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
airtwardo 7 #42 April 10, 2013 Quote Will riding a goat get you pregnant? Depends on the goat.... ~ If you choke a Smurf, what color does it turn? ~ Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
mik 2 #43 April 10, 2013 QuoteSkydiving with a cat is frowned upon, almost everywhere. Except in Russia, where it is a requirement of the the first jump post-AFF (along with old frap hat) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HYS_Gge9Klc *********************************************** I'm NOT totally useless... I can be used as a bad example Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
brokenwing 1 #44 April 11, 2013 however taking a roadkill gopher (long time ago so i may not recall the exact details) and doing accuracy approaches is a perfectly acceptable activity -- unless, of course, that you are Bill Ottley (RIP) and a wing of your Bonanza (again details fuzzy) has been designated dead center. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
swovelin 11 #45 April 12, 2013 Ooh, ooh, ooh! Another old-time jumper just reminded me of some additional "unusual but true facts" about skydiving, as follows: • The Downer You Are, The Faller You Fast - You fall faster as you get closer to the earth and gravity - this is especially true of BASE jumping as I'm sure you can attest. • Sunset Loads - It is a well known fact that winds at sunset will subside if enough alcohol is consumed within the USGS grid in question before Green Light. I believe the formula is V=-3k/1liter squared where V=velocity, k = knots and 1 liter is clearly not enough. • DZ Managers - The timing of canopy rides for the purpose of punishing low-pullers simply doesn't count if said stopwatch has been cleared within 5 minutes of the event. (throw hat now). • Reserves - The number of emergency deployments is in direct proportion to the number of times ones mouth is open regarding the lack of said emergency deployments. There! I hope that helps to clarify matters! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
airtwardo 7 #46 April 12, 2013 The slower ya pack the slower it opens! ~ If you choke a Smurf, what color does it turn? ~ Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Rover 11 #47 April 12, 2013 QuoteMany thanks My beer drinking team has a skydiving problem!2 wrongs don't make a right - but 3 lefts do. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
strife 0 #48 April 12, 2013 QuoteWill riding a goat get you pregnant? still end up with a kid Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
PROGRESSIVE 0 #49 April 13, 2013 If one hundred skydivers were all wearing balloon suits on a successful formation dive, ie, all hooked up in freefall, they could land safely without the use of a parachute. (Don't drop a grip!) Pete (It may require two hundred balloon suits. I forgot. First try one hundred. If I'm wrong, go for two hundred) Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
airtwardo 7 #50 April 14, 2013 Quote If one hundred skydivers were all wearing balloon suits on a successful formation dive, ie, all hooked up in freefall, they could land safely without the use of a parachute. (Don't drop a grip!) Pete (It may require two hundred balloon suits. I forgot. First try one hundred. If I'm wrong, go for two hundred) ...already GOT that tee-shirt! ~ If you choke a Smurf, what color does it turn? ~ Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites